Is there anything that would cause a person to legitimately not process alcohol normally in their body? A person says that they had 3 shots on an empty stomach. I have other reasons to believe this is the truth. This person also became sick with a stomach bug (running a fever). Four hours later this person clocked a BAC of .27 which is borderline alcohol poisoning. The stomach bug is still there today, 18 hours later. Fever and diarrhea today. Any thoughts?

I grew up in Texas. I remember reading up on the whole "catch and release" system that had everyone in an uproar, but the root of all that was how long it takes to get their cases heard. Has improving that system even been part of anyone's immigration/border plan? That would seem like a no-brainer. And the fact that they can't work in the mean times, I totally agree with Terabith it's just a setup for failure. But also, how I personally concluded that no one really wants to solve it is the fact that they never go after the employers with any seriousness. They will do a raid and haul off brown people on television...but zero consequences for the employers. Until someone is willing to make that stand, I will never believe any plan is real about solving anything.

That's one story being told, but it's far from clear. There are contradicting stories out there which will undoubtedly take awhile to hash out. Whichever the case, the issue of a federal agency being denied entry by a state agency seems problematic. If Texas has the right to arrest illegal immigrants (which I don't necessarily disagree with) they should still not prohibit federal agencies from doing their job in the matter. However the migrants died, it's sad that we've reached the point where anyone feels they "deserved it".

This is an inevitable result of dehumanizing certain groups of people.

It was frozen when I put it on the counter. It was cooked shrimp like in a ring with cocktail sauce in the middle. At the end parts of it were still frozen but parts of it were unfrozen. I put it in the fridge immediately after.

Frozen shrimp cocktail ring on the counter for three hours??? Room temp 66 degrees UPDATE I ate it and I lived! 😁

My local rural school district just added armed security but with no school-environment training and will not release to anyone what their training or credentials requirements are. At the same time they refused to renew a mental health grant, which resulted in them firing 15 mental health professionals. They did this because "schools are for education, not mental health or social services." Comments were made that "mental health was just a cover for that gender garbage anyway". So yes, it's hard not to feel discouraged.

I wasn't talking about this guy in particular but dating in general right now. So you can be thinking about your mindset as you move forward.

Adding what someone else mentioned that it's the norm to date multiple people at the same time until it's officially declared exclusive. I would hate that personally, but that's the vibe now and it is assumed. But it sort of makes sense given how many people flake out, so you are not putting all your eggs in one basket.

THIS. I am stunned by the stories I heard from my daughter and her single friends. Sadly, you're almost better off assuming the person will be an a-hole and then being pleasantly surprised if they are not. Maybe change your mindset about it. I get it, I would have a horrible time with it! DH and I say we caught the last chopper outta 'Nam! Someone else mentioned thinking seriously about if this process is good for you right now. I think that's valid, not because it's wrong to want a relationship, but because the dating process right now is SO FULL of games and rejection, you really need a thick skin. It's that bad.

I am so sorry and that sounds awful for your husband. I've said for many years there is no one more miserable than a good man who is unemployed. It is so tied up with their identity, they are just miserable.

If you are using dating sites, I recommend a subscription to one of those background check services. My daughter used that and it revealed so many weirdos! Scary out there. Another vote for nerds though. I married a nerd (38 happy years), my daughter's now long-term bf is a nerd/gamer who is just graduating with pharmacy degree. My niece found a lovely man after two failed relationships.. he's a D&D nerd. Not very ambitious but NICEST and most unpretentious guy ever. Just sayin... Some of them are indeed a little too weird, but the good ones are amazing.

Dd and her bf were both down over Christmas with stomach bug. His lasted several days with fever, hers was shorter. After the vomiting is over we always do applesauce with 2 opened capsules of probiotics dumped in. It definitely seemed to help her stomach recover faster. She did not have days of diarrhea like bf did.

Just saw this, but I started making cocktails during COVID and it's a hobby now! My favorite super-easy is Malibu coconut rum and orange pineapple juice. The juice comes in little cans in the juice section. We do 2 shots rum and one can of juice. You can also add vodka or peach schnapps. Another good one if you only have vodka is vodka, cranberry juice and 7up. 2 shots vodka, equal parts juice and 7up. I do all of these in a tall glass with ice.

I get that. It's pretty much what I've been doing for the last year or more. There have been cracks in our friendship that I've tried to address and she has not wanted to discuss. So step by step we've been retreating to this surface level communication. It's only made her anger and resentment build up more, it didn't make anything better. To me that's fine temporarily but not permanently. Any of us can find more "acquaintances" in our life, people we are friendly with, but can't be totally ourselves around or honest with. She has said awful things about me. I don't see it healthy for me to keep investing in a former best friend who now wants to move to acquaintance while still thinking awful things about me that I'm not allowed to address. I was fine all this time giving her more space. But she's telling me she doesn't see that changing. I can't rationalize it anymore. I feel like I would just be setting myself up as a target for her anger. In her romantic relationships there have been serious problems that she has just ignored and carried on like nothing was happening. Horrible hateful arguments that they would just wake up the next day and start talking about the weather. So I get that for her that is not an unusual response. But every time, that just leads to nothing being resolved and the eventual total blowup and destruction of the relationship. I mean, has that philosophy LONG TERM ever worked for anyone? It's been like two years of this for us. So yes, I hear that's what she wants from me right now, but I am not able to continue it, and don't see it ending up well if it did.

I feel like she is dealing in counseling with her life-long habit of keeping destructive men in her life. I have been lumped in with that group. Unfortunately, she never really gave me the chance of respect to prove otherwise, just kept a tally of all the things that seemed to fit the narrative, never discerning whether or not they were true. I get it. My daughter came out of a toxic relationship, and is in a healthy one now. At the beginning she was super "on-the-lookout" for problematic behaviors, as she should have been, but sometimes went overboard. And that was a much shorter period of time than we're talking about here. Even healthy partners can hurt each other. It just should never be by intention or malice, and should be made better when it's pointed out. It's sometimes hard to see if this is a bad person who is good sometimes, or a good person who is bad sometimes. Because we all act less than our best at times. OT, hubby just brought me home a donut because I've been sad. ❤️

Thank you for all the perspective. It has really helped solidify what I already know and feel but just didn't want to accept. My heart keeps thinking, there has to be something I can do, or say, or should have done or said. But it's time to just accept what is.

Yes I see that. She doesn't want the friendship. I have to accept what is.

She's going back decades but including more recent things that she assigned bad motives to. Examples: I am VERY happily married, but she has accused me of trying to get attention from her husband and "competing" with her. (3 years ago) Her husband is a complete ass. During my daughter's graduation party (5-ish years ago) there was an incident where she was talking loudly about a topic we both knew was really touchy to my husband, so I kept giving her a "zip it" look when I went by. She then asked in the midst of all these people as i was walking by "why are you being so crappy to me" and I ignored her because we were in the middle of everyone. The next day we were engaging normally, she never said anything, we had a couple more days of fun visiting. I guess I should have come back to it but she didn't seem bothered by it later so I just forgot about it. Only recently she brought it up as an example of how I "treat her as less than, not really family, like I don't want her around, etc" I honestly barely remembered the incident, that interaction was the extent of it. The rest of the party I was introducing her around as "my best friend of 40 years!" She was a lot more snippy to me at her daughter's wedding, but I just blew it off, because wedding. Both of these examples were never brought up at the time, only now. If I had known how she was feeling I would have apologized and reassured her. She's been keeping a list of grievances she never said anything about but confirm whatever her narrative is. I feel like she has some deep insecurities and has projected that onto our friendship. I agree with the other posters who said she's trying to take control and set boundaries but is being destructive with it. She has always let the men in her life treat her badly. I confess I feel angry after all the crap she has put up with from men, I'm the one she decides to cut off. 😕 Thanks to all for listening to my drama. It's been helpful to me to vent and process.

She's accused my of some pretty crappy behavior. Obviously I've deeply hurt her (without meaning to), but she has also hurt me. I had the feeling she expected to be able to say whatever she felt and I shouldn't challenge in order to "prove myself" to her. I'm not okay with that kind of interaction. But also didn't think it would really HELP anything in the relationship either. It would only imbed the dysfunction further.

In a normal relationship you reach terms you both feel good about. I wasn't insisting, "no, we will talk about this now, even though you've said you're not ready!" I was acknowledging her desires and adding my own, "okay, then let's just wait until you are ready since my desire is not to set up unhelpful conversations". The vitriol is totally out of proportion to anything happening. Sadly you are right, it's time to just grieve now.

So, I responded this: I'm so sad and sorry for whatever all you are going through, the things you can no longer share with me. I can't pretend I don't feel ripped apart inside and don't feel lost and confused about how we got here. I don't think having more interactions where we are both not being honest will help anything. So maybe let's give it some more time. I love you and I always will. She responded furiously, that of course I had to control everything like always, and to stop sending her my "occasional insincere texts to see how she was doing when that clearly was all about me and nothing to do with her". So yeah! 😔 Thank you guys though, because I have a tendency to overthink that I responded badly to make her act that way. You guys give me some perspective to keep me from overthinking. I tried to word my responses carefully as best I could.

It's been a 40 year friendship. 😥 The most important person in my life outside my husband.

So, since I posted this I've sent her a few polite but distant texts "thinking of you" sort of things. She responded a couple times with short responses. Today I got this text: In a couple of weeks I might be ready to connect a lil bit on the phone. I'f you're wanting to hash out the stuff between us or want explanations or gonna feel the need to defend yourself more... I'm not gonna be in a space to do that for a long time. If you feel you don't want to connect on my terms ... no worries. Letting you know what I can do and in what appropriate timeframe. I responded: What would that look like, just so I understand? Like just chit chat surface stuff like we were earlier this year? Nothing serious or just nothing serious about us? You still do not feel safe sharing anything about your real life with me? I'm asking so I can think about how I would feel resuming interaction with you on that level, not asking for explanation, I hear you that you don't want to give that. She responded: I can't tell you exactly how the conversation will go. What happens organically happens. I'm not up to being interrogated. If you need more than that to decide ...that's all I can give right now. I can't do a back and forth. Ttul. So first, I felt like I tried really hard to be respectful in my response, but she still took that as interrogating. Second, I feel like she's telling me she expects whatever interactions we have to be on her terms 100 percent, which might involve me specifically not "defending myself". Am I reading this wrong? I'm kind of feeling like this reconnection is not something I want to engage in. But I don't want to trash the whole friendship either. Thoughts?

My daughter somehow grew up with the expectation that she would have many true friends in her life, and that other people would be as kind and supportive as she is. She (a person who goes the extra mile, gets the surprise cup of coffee for a colleague, would do anything for a friend) has been consistently hurt at what other people consider "friendships" and how she is treated by them. I, a person who has had two people in my life I considered real friends, one of which is my husband, did not give her this expectation. But there it is! I told in another thread how my life-long best friendship has recently broken up. So I've been putting out a bit of effort to be social. HOPELESS! Seriously, for all the talk about people being isolated, lonely, needing community, etc.... no one really seems that interested. So, ((hugs))...