The purpose of a booster seat is primarily to get good placement of the shoulder belt, I believe. Since you only have a lap belt in an airplane, then, I think, you don't need a car seat once the child is out of the 5 point harness. So, around 2 or 3? Personally, I think I stopped using the carseat around 2 yo.

I pay $40/day for someone to stay overnights at our home to pet sit (and we round up to the nearest day). I don't require them to be there 24/7, but they can't leave for more than 8 (or so) hours at a time and need to spend every night there. We have 4 dogs, 4 cats, 2 goats, etc. . . but it is actually fairly easy b/c the dogs just go in and out our back yard (no walking). I think we are lucky to have people who will do this happily for 40/day. We live in a low wages area. In a major city/suburb, I think I'd be lucky to find someone for 60-80/day.

$50/day

I think I'd save IEW until the child is comfortable writing several paragraphs at a sitting -- say 3rd grade or so, depending on the child. I find IEW quite valuable, but don't know that it'd be very valuable to start prior to 3rd or 4th grade. Then again, I haven't tried it that early, so who knows! Prior to IEW, I'd chose a program that focuses on writing meaningful, clear sentences. . . or skip official "writing" lessons altogether and simply use narration and free/fun writing, letter writing, etc. . .

When I had plastic miniblinds, I used to take them down (easy to do) and wash them with dish soap and a sponge in my bath tub every year or two. Gross, but it worked great and actually got them clean. Getting them wet didn't seem to hurt anything. Just have to clean the tub when you are done!

I don't like to punish for mistakes. This was a mistake. It totally stinks, but, it is just a mistake. They happen. More often to some of us than others. I would punish for the lying however you would punish similar lies (as in, lying to get out of trouble, but not malicious). I would also start using my freezer key. I might well keep it somewhere that everyone knew about, but all kids would be prohibited from touching it under pain of dire punishment. I would no longer allow any kids into the freezer. I'd just go down there myself (or have dh do so) to get food from it, and keep the regular upstairs fridge/freezer adequately stocked for kid stuff. I feel for you. I coupon shop, OAMC cook, and buy $800 in beef once a year. . . so I fear a kid leaving a freezer ajar with a quaking heart. So far, we've been lucky. But, I keep telling myself it is foolish to keep freezer pops in the big freezers b/c it is just tempting fate. I think I'll move them inside after reading this. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Don't be too hard on him. He likely feels worse than you know. $600 is a lot to you, but to him it is SOOOO much more, and he will feel really crummy about it for a loooonnnngggg time.

In my small IRL hs circle, the norm actually seems to be to finish up about a year early, and to start college at 17.

DS10 used it this past year. We were both very happy! Any specific ??s?

7000 sf? Unfinished? Money tight? Honestly, it sounds like a money pit to me. I can hardly imagine the utility bills. Makes me shudder just to think of cleaning it, let alone heating & cooling it! Let alone FINISHING it! Flooring for 7000 sf??? UGH! I would think long and hard about it, and resist unless you truly need all that space.

32. I wanted a fourth, but dh was not game. . . I still wanted a 4th until recently when he did the permanent deed. . . I've come to accept it recently that I am now just too old -- at least for MY comfort level. :( I will be 40 in a couple months. I think I could have comfortably had a baby a few years ago (39 was always my mental cut off), but not now. One of my best friends has been trying for her 4th and has lost two pregnancies (never having had any problems with the older children) and it made me realize that I am thankful to be spared that pain. Maybe dh knew what he was doing.

Maybe there already is one, but if not, could you start a "social group" here on WTM for single hs'ing moms? I don't know how the social groups work but I see people referencing them, so I bet you could start one! (((hugs)))

Mmm, well, gosh, no, what I do is *not* a formal dinner party IMHO. I grew up in formal/political Northern VA with a mom who hosted formal dinner parties (and still does) regularly. She has a biweekly cleaning lady and that's the only hired help she's ever had. She has had a few parties catered with caterers providing wait staff) but most parties she has done all her own except occasionally having some dishes/platters catered/delivered. At a formal dinner party, you do *not* bring food (wine or chocolates to be consumed at your hostess's leisure is oK -- a dessert or other dish for that night would actually be very rude) -- you bring a hostess *gift*, but NOT something that you expect to be consumed that day/night. . . and the hostess serves, cleans up, etc. My mom and her friends hosted formal dinner parties routinely in the 1970s/1980s and none of them had hired help. The hostess did all the cooking (fancy food), serving, and cleaning up. They'd have adults only. . . assigned seats even sometimes, but definitely with exactly 8 guests, no odd bachelors unless they had a paired odd female. . . everyone dressed up. . . kids were off with a sitter. . . My mom cleared the table and then did ALL the dishes after the guests left or the next day. . . Noone else would have dreamt of going into the kitchen and helping and Mom wouldn't have dreamt of taking time away from hostessing to begin washing up -- all that waited until the guests were gone. Noone came into the kitchen except the hostess. Folks were formally led from living room cocktails, to dining room meal, back to living room coffee. . . There was little/none of the casual standing-in-the-kitchen gabbing while the hostess worked. In fact, my mom STILL throws me out of her (open floor plan!!!) kitchen when she is seriously cooking b/c it obviously stresses her out to have distractions in the kitchen. So, anyway, formal dinner parties are alive and well in certain places/circles. . . and certainly can be done w/o staff. Just w/ a lot of work from the hostess!

I would try not to think of it again. Keep sending the cards. Many/most kids wouldn't think to call and say thank you w/o a parent prompting them. SIL may be too irritated to do so, or may have unrelated issues that just made her forget/choose not to do the "proper" thing this time. If anything, I'd think it'd be extra nice of you to send an EXTRA card or packages to your nieces every so often (silly holidays, perhaps.) just so they remember you care. Many families stop doing "kid cards" when the kids grow up. Your 20 yo may have just "aged out" of getting routine b'day cards/$$. Does HE send your inlaws b'day greetings? Any greetings? Calls? We stopped sending our younger cousins and nieces/nephews b'day stuff around age 18. We now treat them with the same benign neglect as we do our other beloved adult relatives, lol. *Kids* get special treatment. . . grown ups get what they GIVE (for the most part.)

LOL, I so clearly remember having to take a few weeks playing rhyming games with dd#1 at that point in 100EZL before we could move on. So, for my younger dc, I made sure to play rhyming games from an early age so they were great rhymers (is that a word?!) by the time they began 100EZL. I do think it is important. It will help them reading and spelling. Just take a break from 100EZL and play rhyming games for a few minutes every day. Make up silly songs, rhyme in the car. . . etc.

My guess -- contact allergy. I was never an allergic person until my late 20s. Not even serious hay fever. My allergy issues began around age 27 with some skin sensitivities to medications (esp in the SENSITIVE areas, if you KWIM) and then a food allergy at age 30. . . Since age 35, my skin issues have gotten worse and worse. I can only use J&J head-to-toe baby wash for sensive skin for my sensitive areas. . . I break into hives frequently from things like sitting on the carpet. . . and other times for I just have no idea why. . . God forbid I get near poison ivy! Obviously, you want to try to identify what might be breaking you out so you can avoid irritants. Google up and you'l find a long list of possibles. It is certainly possible that your hives had nothing to do with the originial medicaiton. . . or, alternately, that your system was somehow sensitized and now you are allergic. . . So, anyway, my cure all is a tub (1 lb tub for my $10 copay, lol) of triamcinolone cream. It is extremely effective and allows me to avoid oral steroids. I just use a bit as needed when the hives break out and they go away right away. No more oral steroids, and no more suffering. Good luck!

I think it is a problem. I wouldn't want someone I cared about to do it. I would be seriously concerned about anyone who did it regularly (say, more than a few times a year) or who drove, went to school or work, or cared for children under the influence. But, I do allow for some "normal" experimentation in youth (say 16-28, unmarried, w/o kids) with alcohol and pot -- that wouldn't completely flip me out. I would def. do as much as I can to discourage it. . . and would be upset and concerned. . . but I would not cut them off or totally freak out.

I like casual in many things, and I don't equate casual with rude. I.e., if a little old lady (or anyone) prefers to go my Mrs. Jones, then it is rude to call her Betty (not casual, just rude). I like casual dress b/c frankly I just have better things to do than spend an hour dressing or ironing or taking stuff to the cleaners. . . Formal clothes take longer to deal with. Clothes just aren't that important, IMHO. Maybe this is lazy, but I prefer to think of it as good time management. I like casual entertaining b/c it means I can do it frequently. We have folks (say one family) over for meals once every week or two on average. . . Larger groups (say 3 or more families) for meals every month or two. . . We eat well, and go to a good deal of effort to make delicious food, set a clean and attractive table in a clean home. . . But, our friends nearly always contribute a dish or at least a loaf of bakery bread. . . and without fail someone takes over getting the first and sometimes second loads into the dishwasher. If I hosted these gatherings as formal dinner parties, it would translate into either much simpler food OR much, much more work for me. I just couldn't do it as often. I think everyone enjoys casual entertaining b/c you don't feel a burden when you are a guest and you don't feel exhausted when you are the host!

I would insist that MIL stay away until the sores are healed and gone for at least a few days. No negotiations. If your dh insists on her coming, you must cancel the party as it would be utterly irresponsible to have that kind of party with kids, etc there. No way. If you don't, and someone's kid gets MRSA and ends up in hospital, with major scarring, or even *dies*. . . well, 'nuff said. 10 mos ago my ds had a probable (but not cultured) MRSA sore on his arm. (There'd been MRSA floating around our workplace and we recognized it. . .) It was a Friday when we guessed what it was an my BFF who happens to be a pediatrician (but lives 4 hrs away) advised us to wash/medicate/wait over the weekend as it wasn't getting *worse*. . . We followed the protocols and it got much better on it's own by Monday, so we never had to actually go to the DR. (But, we had access to the "good stuff" topical antibiotics b/c we happened to already have them on hand. . . And we were really, really diligent about washing and bandaging.) Nonetheless, 2 weeks later my dd broke with what we were sure was MRSA on her skin somewhere -- I don't recall where. We treated it the same way and it resolved. We were scheduled to visit my BFF and her toddler 7 days into my dd's MRSA episode (it was almost cleared). BFF didn't want us there no matter. . . and I agreed completely. Trip cancelled. BFF sees MRSA all the time in her job as medical director of the pediatricians at a major hospital. . . She knows the ins/outs and hows/etc. . . It is just *not worth the risk* for a social visit. I've had friends who passed MRSA around their families and watched it happen here with my dc, even though we knew what it was and were as careful as we could be. It is scary stuff.

That is adorable!!!!!!!! What a great idea for a thoughtful, fun, gift when cash isn't in the budget! You could even go bigger for a more showy but still very affordable gift! I am going to steal that sometime!!

8th grade graduation isn't a "real" graduation in my book, so a card and $20 would be about right in my book (birthday equivalent) For high school, I'd go with cash unless there is a specific item you know she wants/needs and you can pick it out. Amount would vary with your family habits and budget. For me, it'd probably be $100 for a family member or very close family friend. (Less for more distant acquaintances.)

Sick, depressing, sad. The ironic thing is that in every study of wellbeing and happiness I've seen (as it relates to friendship), the importance of having a few close relationships is clear. I certainly know that in *my* life, I find support, comfort, and energy in the few close friends I have in my life. . . while the other more superficial friendships are convenient, pleasant. . . but not at all the strength and inspiration that my close friends are. I think there is value in being friendly and comfortable with a wide variety of people. . . but it is essential to have a few dear friends, and learning how to manage those close relationships has much greater influence on your future happiness in marriage/family. . . although I can see how learning to fake being an extrovert could be valuable in business. I agree that they are trying to mold everyone into at least *acting* like an extrovert. I feel so sad for the kids who are being deprived their close friends. So sad.

UPS

I put out plates of veggies & fruits as an appetizer before meals and they usually get polished off b/c the kids are starving. We also make fruit salads frequently with any old meal. I typically aim for 2 to 3 veggies with dinner. Say, green beans, salad, and a fruit salad (plus one meat and one starch.) Soups are a great way to get in veggies if you enjoy cooking them, as they are another course and come before the main course, so again, they usually get eaten. (I adore soup.) Smoothies are really yummy and an easy way to load up on gobs of fruit.

Don't buy more than 6 months out if it is a new curriculum for you. (Something better might strike your fancy, or just a new edition.) After a couple years of using somethign that works (say, math), you might buy up to a year ahead if it is a great deal. ETA: Of course, if something is a SCREAMING deal, all bets are off. . . and you are limited just by storage space, lol.

A turning point for me came during a church annual meeting during which a few things in the budget struck me as inconsistent with responsible leadership: 1) a suggestion from leadership that was being seriously considered to encourage/facilitate members to donate via credit cards. 2) a completely outofbalance annual budget with a "hope we come up with it" line that added up to about $25k (out of a 250k budget). So, we were being asked to approve a budget with a 10% fudge factor and no plan to fix that. 3) we were spending about 25k for MUSIC. Now, I love music. It's wonderful, especially at church. But, our annual childrens budget was under $300 (there are NO missing digits!) and we were spending 25,000 on music. . . while approving a budget with 25k more expenses than income? It just boggled my mind. It was the last annual meeting I've ever attended. I just don't want to know how the sausage is made. . . But, I'd surely never be motivated to give up an emergency fund for any project-of-the-year at any church. Not right, imho.