We buy a similar number of gifts for each child. They each always get a new shirt, new PJs, a new book (or new books, each kid gets the same amount), and then at least one toy/game. They have no idea whose books/PJs/shirts/toys cost more or less. We just try to make sure they all get approximately the same number of gifts. If one kid got a HUGE gift they would be fine with having less, but generally the "large" gifts we give are shared amongst the kids anyway.

Just adding my voice to the chorus of not just no but HECK NO.

So it pretty much sounds like it turned in to a celebration of dildos and fart guns. Now THAT's the college experience right there.

You're hired. I'm not sure what for, but you're hired.

"There hasn't been a mass shooting for a while, we should probably make one up, it always seems to help people realize the important of making sure everyone can own guns." erm... ok... good luck with that logic.

This amuses me because DH just ordered me a chocolate peanut butter ice cream cake so I can go a little crazy after the baby is born, lol. I should probably still be watching my sugars after he's born, but... darnit, I'm gonna have at least ONE slice to celebrate! Besides, ice cream cake is totally a "recovery from labour" kind of food, right? (Please don't actually answer that.)

Frankly, I was kind of looking forward to having an excuse for a cupcake related incident. ;) You all have disappointed me!

I think this is a large part of it for me. When I actually have time to think deeply about something... well, then I know in the back of my head that I'm forgetting about something else I should probably be doing, lol. My husband refers to it as "having too many tabs open in my brain."

Look, I'm supposed to be watching my blood sugars right now, but I'm 9 months pregnant. If this turns in to another cupcake thread, I'm not sure I can stop myself from giving in to temptation, and ON YOUR HEAD BE IT. ;)

I think there IS a happy medium between "take her abuse" and "cut them off". You just... drop the ball. You don't get in touch with them or try desperately to arrange things or make them right. The ball is in their court, whenever they're ready. If they get nasty through other people, don't take it personally; you've done everything you can and however much they may point it in your direction, their anger is not about you. Let them take the lead from her on out. That may mean a long time with no contact, and that's okay; that may be what they need right now. And even when they ARE ready, it may be tense the first time because clearly you guys feel like an easy target for her, and that can be difficult to shift away from. But hopefully it will get a little bit better each time.

Yes, he sounds dangerous. He sounds like he's not going out and doing anything about his delusions... yet. He's in the "preparation and protection" stage, and that could slip in to the "action and self-defense" stage at any given moment from pretty much any imagined trigger.

This is scary. He's telling you that he's got big plans and activities to be a part of, and you know that those involve searching for "jihadist training camps" on google earth and then doing.... something. Lord knows what. Please contact the police in his area, they need to know that a mentally unstable man is out there actively searching for someone who looks like a "problem" that he can "fix".

Thinking of you today, hoping your trip was safe and that you're getting some actual answers.

No Trader Joe's here, sadly, I'm in Canada. (Maybe I should post that as a con on Katie's thread about moving to Canada, lol.) Love the sausage balls and mini quiche suggestions, those sound simple and crowd-pleasing. :D I can whip those up in a hurry, too!

DH and I are hosting both a family Christmas party and a New Years Eve party this year. We're also expecting our 5th child, probably to be born sometime next week. (It's honestly easier for us to just host parties in our own house than to deal with packing the kids up and doing Christmas/NYE at someone else's house, having to find somewhere to put the younger two down to sleep, taking my post-recovery supplies with me, finding a quiet spot to nurse the baby, etc. We have a great house for hosting parties so this way is just simpler.) I want to do as much of the prep work ahead of time as possible. Ideally I'll spend some time this weekend making food for the parties and then freezing them so we can just take them out to thaw or bake the day of the parties. We only have one crockpot and we're using that to do meatballs. Although I suppose we could always borrow another one from a friend if we wanted. :) I'd love suggestions for appetizers that can be made ahead of time, frozen, and then reheated or thawed would be perfect, but I'm also open to things that are very simple to make the day of. Ideas so far: Pepperoni pizza bites with pizza sauce for dipping. (Basically small rolls stuffed with pepperoni and cheese) meatballs in the crockpot nachos cinnamon rolls (already have these made and frozen) mini-cheesecakes in muffin cups (also already made) Throw some suggestions my way! These will both be all-ages parties, so both kid-friendly recipes and fancier adult ones are welcome. As you can see I'm leaning towards kid-friendly at this point since some of our friends are not particularly, uh, adventurous when it comes to food. ;) I'd still like to have one or two "nice" options, though!

I would be very worried, but I'm not sure how founded in reality that fear would be. I don't imagine this is the kind of thing they keep stats on. :/ I'm sorry you have to deal with this, wow.

I agree with the above post. NS is a lovely and comparatively inexpensive place to live, but health care is different there, as is the way of life in general. It's very laid-back, to the point that it drives some Type A people absolutely insane. Like everywhere else, you'll want to check it out thoroughly, there are a lot of pros and cons.

Yes, you should absolutely go to a counsellor. A lot of those issues point to serious underlying concerns, and the longer it's left without being identified and dealt with, the more difficult it will be for her to deal with them. Please contact a counsellor asap, both for her sake and your own. I don't think you can afford NOT to.

We have a fake tree that looks quite real. When people see the tree stand peeking out and realize it isn't real, they often go up and touch it to make sure, and sometiems even then they look twice, lol. Take a close look at the tips of the branches You want the ones that have molded plastic needles on the end, they look like this. The inner branches are just filler for colour, but no one can really get a close look at those. Ours is going on 9 1/2 feet tall and for 10 years and we've had no problems, other than the maintenance of replacing burnt out bulbs every year. so the strand doesn't blow.

Well, that depends. How much an extrovert are you? I actually love the winter, and I am NOT a fan of the cold. If I were an extrovert who constantly wanted to be out of the house and seeing people and interacting, I might go stir crazy. As it is, I have no problem saying, "I don't want to drive in this. Let's stay home today and cuddle in front of the fireplace and watch a movie." It can also be a lot of fun once to go out and play in the snow, build forts, go tubing/skiing/snowboarding/sledding/tobanning, etc. There are definitely SUPER cold days where you just want to stay inside and not drive anywhere, and sometimes there can be a few of those in a row. But there are also a lot of days where the sun is shining, it's perfect for sledding (especially as a homeschooler when all the kids are in school and you get the best hills to yourself and friends who also homeschool, lol), and everything looks like a Christmas postcard. If you would go nuts having to stay in the house for a few days in a row when you're snowed in and/or it's too cold to go outside for long, then yeah, you might go a little nuts. But for those of us who don't mind a few days of just hanging out in the house with our family... it's not so bad at all.

It's called a block heater and is usually in the cylinder block. The plug sticks out of your front grill and you plug it in to a regular outlet. The further north you go, the more common it is to see electrical posts in mall parking lots, etc, so people can plug their cars in while they go shopping. There are two main benefits: first, it stops the oil from getting cold and thick (not really freezing, but unable to move properly through the engine to lubricate it), and second, it means that when you get in to the vehicle yourself, your car's heater will actually be giving you hot air right away instead of blowing cold air on you for the first few minutes while your car warms up.

First off, I wanted to say that I'm sorry it came to this. We felt the same way at our old church, though we weren't there for as long, and moving on was difficult but allowed us to grow SO MUCH. I know that feeling of things coming to a head, and the relief and grief and hope for the future and sorrow all kind of comingle together in to one big emotional wrecking ball. I felt that so many times... when my ldest was finally given his diagnosis of autism, when my grandmother finally died after a long, painful battle with cancer, the first time one of my children was stillborn and we were told that there wasn't anything we could have done and that it would in no way affect future fertility... it's honestly such a BIG feeling that is so overwhelming and happens so often. I'm kind of aghast right now because I've realized that you're right, there ISN'T a word for it that I'm aware of! How is it that a feeling that's so huge and so crucial to the experience of human doesn't have a name?

Life in Canada will vary a LOT depending on where you want to live. Living expenses like food, clothing, books, furniture, etc, are higher here. Real estate is all over the board. Like most places, big cities can be quite expensive whereas smaller/less developed communities can be quite reasonable. Homeschooling is legal everywhere except Quebec (frankly I wouldn't recommend Quebec unless you speak French, the culture there is very... haughty, I suppose), with varying levels of oversight. Moving here isn't too difficult if you're a skilled worker. But yeah, the winters will be a BIG change, and you should probably spend some time here in winter before you sign up for a lifetime of it. ;)

Or is it perhaps your insurance company? Serious question, no snark intended. It certainly seems to me as an outsider as though the insurers, not the patient or doctors, get to decide what's actually urgent or serious enough to deserve treatment. (I'm excluding from this those able to afford to pay out of pocket for ANY possible treatment regardless of cost, as that demographic seems to be next to non-existant.) Is that an inaccurate perception on my part?

I agree with the PP who said she probably just felt like she needed to make SOME kind of recommendation after the inspection. I sounds like the sort of thing my kids (okay, fine, or my husband) would say when they're completely out of their depth and are just reaching for ANYTHING that will sound remotely relevant on the topic, no matter how poorly informed they may be. It may also be that on her end, she's supposed to fill out a section that lists recommendations she made and it reflects poorly on her if it's left blank. Clearly it has nothing to do with actually struggling in math, so try to just roll your eyes and carry on.