Someone I know has a son who tested positive for Covid (likely meaning the rest of the family was infected). From what was shared with me he told this news to the others who regularly play soccer together, and they all were fine with still playing a big multi family soccer game together. Even though I already knew they all played twice weekly in violation of our county guidelines, and didn't use masking or distancing in many of their interactions, I just never imagined that they would all knowingly play while one of them had active Covid in the household. I felt like something in my brain broke. Or maybe my heart because it made me cry. I feel like I don't know who people are anymore.

It has been in a way comforting to hear this has been happening to others. I've felt like I'm in some type of messy middle. I think this whole thing has brought up a deep longing for some type of community that I feel more fully connected with, rather than being friendly with a lot of groups, but never really at feeling at "home". Having been part of that "home" type of church group/social network at other times in my life makes me wish for it again.One of my good friends who is part of a more progressive church has had a pretty much across the board conscientiousness about covid health practices among her church "family". My friends/acquaintances in the homeschooling circles seem to be all in together as they dine out, have parties and huge indoor church gatherings with no distancing. I guess, lately, I've often felt like I'm friendly with different groups, but never really part of a tight group that I have really really similar values with. However, I should be very grateful that my husband and I are mainly on the same page and that my children have been mostly happy during this time. I guess it has been hard because I think in other years, social disappointment would have been offset by the comfort of family gatherings or whatever.... But everything is park or porch visits and masks, which I agree with given the current situation, but still, altogether it's not as comforting. Hoping to have a couple good cries about this and move on to be a more experienced, stronger person.

Maybe one thing I became painfully aware of is that one or two relationships I thought were friendships may have more been "acquaintances that got together in person frequently". Once the in person meetups stopped, at first due to shutdowns and then more so because I wasn't interested in meeting up for activities with no attempts at social distancing/masks, communication wasn't very reciprocal and dried up to very minimal. So, that was disappointing. I didn't want to do any more in person meetups that didn't involve some type of current health practices, but I didn't want to entirely not communicate either.

The idea about the "backstory" is helpful. I admit this has been at play in my own mind.

That's good to hear. I've been very grateful for my friends with whom I've been able to have a difference of opinion with, but it's left at that. I'm also grateful for another friend who has been more than happy to meet me where I'm at, by doing a social distanced visit or zoom. It hasn't all been bad. Bu, like I said before, the social fallout was just so unexpected...and sad.

Hello everyone. I'm just seeing who else is with me in this still kinda depressing boat. The social fallout from Covid was something I did NOT expect in March. Since the time we went into lockdown, I had one person stop speaking to me, a rather close friendship turn very distant (I'm still confused by this one, but I believe differing covid views played a part), one other friend consider me something close to the Anti-Christ because I was happy to follow the gov guidelines ( I was happy my government was at least trying SOMETHING, even if it wasn't the most proactive or ideal). Some of the broken or damaged friendships mentioned above also have had sad results for my children, since we tended to socialize as families. I've also felt very alienated and confused by the behavior of many people I've been friendly with, or been part of homeschool groups with, who would belong in the conservative Christian camp. I was baffled by the quickness to defy health guidelines and promote whatever newest somewhat conspiratorial theory that came around. It got to the point where I was refreshed nearly to tears to hear that people in my house church group (which I had only barely been getting to know more before the pandemic hit) were conscientious about trying to reasonably comply with the guidelines and who did not see masks as the mark of the beast or etc. I have lost a lot socially during this time. I had really enjoyed my children's once weekly school program, but when I saw that they were not going to comply with the health guidelines that apply to local private schools and day camps (public schools weren't opening then) I was again at a loss. I could not see, being pregnant and still in contact with my parents (who are diabetic and older) participating in such an environment, and I further questioned if I wanted people who had that perspective teaching science to my children, as previously planned. For awhile now, I've been more aligned with an approach to Christianity that differed to the general evangelical circle I was initially part of....but Covid seemed to really strain or break some of the last remaining ties. I've not lost anyone close to me to Covid during this time. But at times the social fallout has made me very depressed to the point where I almost feel like I've been in grief over relationships that have, in a way, died. Things are beginning to look up. I've found some new social outlets that I can feel reasonably "responsible to my community" by participating in. I was thankful for some of the house church members I've gotten to know a bit better during this time. But, still, there's a part of me that continues to feel a deep loss and sadness when I think about what's happened to my relationships these last six months. Anyone else had something similar happen?