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maryode

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  1. There are a lot of great comments here. One thing that’s maybe missing is helping him see that even if he caught Covid, chances are still quite slim he’d have any problems. Then shield him from the news, don’t discuss Covid at the dinner table, etc. Focus on other things your family enjoys instead so he doesn’t fixate on Covid at least at home. Surely you know know plenty of people who’ve had Covid and been just fine—if he brings it up, talk about their experiences and how they came through it with little trouble. Obviously this might not fly for a wide variety of reasons may not work for your kiddo. I truly don’t mean to downplay a serious virus but it’s not like he’s being careless… he may need to hear that while it’s good to try to avoid Covid, even if he did catch it, he’d most likely just have a few cold symptoms and be fine with it. In a way that he would still trust you if he did end up hospitalized of course… but even though hospitalizations are up, they’re still quite unlikely for children. I have one with some anxiety and this message has helped her.
  2. We jumped from Singapore to MM last year, levels 2, 4, and 7, and haven’t looked back. With 3 kids to teach I just couldn’t face the Singapore teachers’ manuals. I love that MM has everything in one place and can be done mostly without help. There are plenty of practice problems- we can even cross some out sometimes. It is incremental and thorough- I don’t notice a huge difference in topics from Primary Math. We have videos through the site if we need them. My kids are all good at math, but varying degrees of low in confidence, and at least two developed more of an appreciation for it and higher confidence after a year of MM. It’s not perfect but much easier to use than SM if math isn’t your favorite to teach. Also you get to purchase a stuffed mammoth support animal just for fun.
  3. We switched to MM last year after years of Singapore (my oldest went from 1st to 6th with Singapore) and I am not looking back! I love that MM is written TO the student. Older kids can nearly learn it by themselves, or when they need help, it's super easy for me to jump in right where they're at since the guidance is right there and I can easily move from kid to kid and understand it. I never liked the teacher guides for Singapore; they felt hard to teach from since although I'm good at math, I'm definitely not a natural teacher of it. After our switch to MM, I no longer had to worry about doing a math lesson with each kid, so it took a lot off my plate. I appreciated the smaller steps, more practice problems for mastery, and videos to accompany when I didn't have time to help, or just for the "cool" factor. Plus, it goes through pre-algebra. And it's super thorough, rigorous, etc., so I don't feel like I have to worry about missing anything. The best parts: when my kids mastered a topic early, we got to cross out problems, and we got to purchase a stuffed mammoth as our "math support animal." Happy people all around. Singapore is fantastic for math-motivated parents and/or kids. But while we're all fine with math, that's just not us! So we will happily stick with MM!
  4. Another poster posted about "when the kids were little"--that wasn't my post, which is why it didn't make sense! 🙂 My girls are 7, 10, and 12. They're super sweet and I love being around them and they actually do willingly go off and read or do their own thing. It's just tricky when we have a lot of schoolwork, music practice, chores, etc. to do that I often have to supervise or help with or hold them accountable for. It just gets intense, and especially since we have a co-op day and other activities that break up our week. I'm not complaining--I generally enjoy our schedule--I just think the addition of an extra person around the house, with all his projects, and work drama, etc., puts me over the top. I also totally agree about leaving the burden on my DH for figuring out his own social/emotional health and I'm not afraid of a conversation. I had not thought of it that way, and you're totally right--it's his challenge to figure this out and he's perfectly capable of that. I just am a researcher and want to make sure that before I approach the conversation, my expectations are reasonable, and I consider every angle to give it the best shot of working out well. And to figure out what I actually want--which is half the battle. I have a few friends I can hash this out with, but I haven't seen them as much lately and sometimes it's also a benefit to figure things like this out anonymously. 🙂 All your advice and others' has been super helpful for putting things in perspective and remembering that I don't have to solve every angle of this--I can lay out reasonable boundaries and inform him of our routine, rope him into our chores list, etc.
  5. Yes. Once I mentioned to him that he always seems to show up just as I've gotten the house all quiet, and he responded that that's when he figured I'd have time to chat. Which totally makes sense, and is super sweet... except this quiet moment is literally what I've motivated myself with the entire morning, and it usually doesn't last more than 15 minutes anyway before either someone breaks the peace, or I need to make dinner/run to the store/do laundry/clean something/make a child work on something, etc.--because I'm responsible for virtually all of it. And that was my last chance at quiet until 10:00 or 10:30 p.m. So glad I'm not alone!! Me being quiet isn't an invitation to come and dump all your stuff on me! It's just me enjoying being quiet. And sometimes quiet is a need, not a want. And how do you keep the magic in the relationship when you're around each other 24/7??? I'm sure it's different for each couple, but absence kinda makes the heart grow fonder around here! I'm sure this is difficult for husbands, too, to be immersed in the day-to-day grind, and without their own change of scenery. Do your DHs do anything like work in a coffee shop or exercise midday to get out? My husband seems to chronically not have enough work to do, which really fuels the problem. How do you handle summer with a work-at-home DH? Summer is my break. I desperately need it. I also feel like since I won't be homeschooling, I will seem that much more available. But I'm totally not--I'll be planning, deep-cleaning, making the kids do chores and practice piano, and figuring out camps, travel, etc. I'll be doing tie-dye and little cooking projects and board games without wanting to simultaneously hold conversations about people I don't know and technical regulations I don't understand. And I'll be trying extra hard to get extra peace and quiet and focus on all my ignored projects. Do ya'll set boundaries for summer too? I'm tempted to basically just rope off the hours from 8-5, except for lunch. We'll do our thing, you do yours.
  6. This is all great advice--thank you!! Part of the problem is that my husband doesn't actually want anyone else to socialize with, or doesn't think he wants anyone else, anyway. He talks to his family, and frequently with one coworker (who's a 60-year-old woman and a good listener, apparently), and my family when they're around. That's it unless I make him get out of the house and be around other people. But his family is long-distance, and has been disappointing him occasionally, so I'm trying to plant the idea in his head that he needs other people--it's just such a huge paradigm shift for him since he's never made friends a priority--more of an afterthought. He will be friendly and visit with the husbands of my friends when we see them, but basically only under duress. Now he's starting to dump his work drama on our 10- and 12-year-olds, since they're good listeners and don't really mind. I think a big part of the problem is that the way he processes is to talk. The way I process is to think my own thoughts in silence, and occasionally to talk (but his eyes glaze immediately if I start talking to him about school, so I don't even try much anymore). So we're inherently at odds. To be honest, I'm in my zone with the kids all day and am very happy to chat with him at 5:00 or 5:30 and later in the evening (as long as I'm not knee-deep in making dinner--which somehow offends him if I can't talk then), but even over lunch...I'd kinda prefer he does his thing and I do mine and we save our conversations for later. That sounds terrible, I know, and it's probably just something I have to get used to since I've had the house to myself, with the kids, for so long. So I think I need to help him figure a few things out and, you're right, set actual limits. He's not 100% unaware and sometimes stops himself, but it's still a constant challenge for me.
  7. Yes! This! And so much of what others have said! Except my husband’s other outlets are really limited and some will disappear after he’s done with his current job and transitions. He’s an introvert too but the verbal processing drives me crazy sometimes, and he does seem to time it when I’ve literally just gotten the kids to all be outside at the same time and I finally have my brain back for a very limited time. Once I did say something and that helped... I just might need a more formal arrangement like other posters have said, and be direct. I think I also need to convince him that he needs friends in similar life situations to verbal process with. I can’t be it. His family is all far away and he doesn’t really want friends, or to leave the house/yard... sigh... So we often have the same conversation multiple times a day and that’s part of the problem... I can’t be all the emotional support for one more person while I’m schooling the kids, running the home, and doing all the things I do. This is why I’m up until 11:30 every night!! It’s finally quiet then!!😆
  8. My husband has been working from home off and on since covid hit, and it's mostly been fine, after a few adjustments--but partly because I thought it was temporary. I admit, though--as an introvert homeschooling 3 kids 12 and under, I'm often happiest when he goes in to the office to work since that means there's one less person in the house. Nothing against him--he just hasn't been busy at work and is pretty chatty (a verbal processor), plus the kids get distracted from their work when he walks through the house. To be honest, listening to and working around one extra person all day feels like too much for me sometimes. Our days just seem to flow better when I can focus on school, housework and activities, and occasionally get a moment of quiet when the kids are all occupied, and then chat with my husband in the evenings. But now he's accepting a full-time work-from-home position. I think I've convinced him to set up an office in the basement so we don't have to tiptoe around him. And I know I just have to get used to having an extra person around the house, and we need to have an honest conversation about what works and what doesn't, but does anyone have any tips for what might help? Or any routines that work for you? Or even a good way to hold the conversation without hurting any feelings? Anyone else in a similar situation?? Please tell me I'm not crazy for not being delighted we'll all spend 100% of our time together!!
  9. I'm teaching a homeschool co-op class on Creative Writing next fall for grades 9-12, and I'm considering using the Creative Writer, with each student purchasing a copy and then going through the assignments as a class. I'm wondering a few things: 1. Would this be workable for a co-op? I was thinking I'd introduce the topic, then we'd potentially work through an assignment or activity from the book as a group. 2. Which level would work best for high-school students? I've taught some of these kids before, and the skill levels are all over the map so I'd love something that can inspire beginners and those who have already delved into creative writing. Also, ideally, I'd like them to work on skills and then use those skills to create short stories, completing at least 2-3 polished short works throughout the year. Would that make sense with this curriculum? I wouldn't be married to the book and would be happy to assign some things independently of it, but I definitely need a guide. 3. Are there grading rubrics or criteria I could use while evaluating papers? I'm a non-fiction writer who's interested in creative writing--but my oldest is 11 so I don't have much practice with high-schoolers. I'd be so grateful for any information on this or any other creative writing curriculum that might work! Thanks!!
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