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About Dreamergal

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    Hive Mind Queen Bee

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  1. I am the mother of a boy who turned 13 this year. For a good part of his life, he was my only child and for a while it was looking like he was my only until DD arrived 4 years ago. So take what I say with that background. DS and I are extremely close and some of it is very good, some of it was destructive because I thought I was only going to be the mother of one, so I pretty much dedicated myself to him during his younger years. I had to step back a bit on that especially when DD was born, but I still intensely mother him. Food is my love language, so it turned out to be his too. We cook a lot together now as I am teaching. He loves to play, I am much more of a swimming and gym person, but I try my utmost to play with him as much as I can. DH and I alternate. I used to lot of manga when I was younger and left it for a few years, mostly forgot everything. Now he has picked up on it and we have added manhwa to it. We don't do much just the two of us because I want us to be a close family unit of 4 but what he is interested in has mostly been my interests vs picking up things that was introduced to him by us or others like electronics, coding or video games. I always facilitate things like making our house a place for his friends to hang out and cook for them and he appreciates that a lot. DS is very close to DH too, but the kind of bonding he has with me is the most. I just mother him now by including him in whatever interests of mine he likes or making an effort to do what he likes. As he grows older, there are interests of his that I do not know or do not want to participate. But I always make an effort to know about them and when he talks, listen to him. We always talk, I always tell him I love him and respect boundaries. I used to hug and kiss him a lot, but as he grew older he did not care much for it. So I respected that a lot. But he always asks for a hug when he wants now, doesn't pull away when I do it, sometimes puts his head on my shoulder or lap, wants me to sit next to him if he finds things stressful. It's gotten longer than I meant to have and sort of rambly. I just do life with him, but always taking care not to smother him or make him dependent on me because I wanted him to feel special as I did that too.
  2. Food prep before is a very big part of cooking and eating healthy in my opinion. I absolutely will not be able to cook the variety or healthy if I have to spend hours chopping and dicing. I use a variety of beans a lot, all dry. It needs soaking overnight. There is no way I can remember to soak beans every night or even plan ahead. I am not organized at all. We get beans in 400 g packages. I soak them overnight, cook and freeze them in around 1.5 cups portion size. So too with pulses. I cook with what seems like a bazillion of them, all needing to be soaked. So I soak 400g for 4 hours, cook them and freeze them in 1 cup size portions. I eyeball them so it can be up or down. I always buy peeled garlic. There is no time in the universe for me to peel garlic. DH is the one that most of the prep but we sit down and cut sometimes 10lbs of onion in various forms. We very rarely eat onion uncooked. Ginger is peeled and frozen. I mostly pound them in a mortar and pestle, but also have ginger garlic paste in the fridge. All vegetables are immediately cut and frozen except what we want to eat fresh. They are also washed again and processed. So too herbs. I even have coconut milk frozen in ice cubes. I knead dough and keep it in the fridge. I also employ gadgets. Food processor is the biggest thing I use next to a mortar and pestle. Rice is always in a rice cooker. I make a lot of spice powders myself, cook pretty much entirely a significant part of all our meals from scratch, but none of it would be possible without major prep before where I am pulling things out of a freezer.
  3. We eat a lot of vegetables. I just include them in pretty much everything we can. "Vegetables" in our diet also include pulses and beans in significant quantities though I do not know how to classify them. Food as medicine is a philosophy I believe in very much and was raised with. We also "eat the rainbow" to boost immunity. I also believe in "bulking up" what we eat nutritionally. I try to balance that with food safety especially in the age of COVID. Ways we implement "eat a rainbow" are adding bell peppers in different colors to pretty much everything. Most everything I cook starts with onion, ginger and garlic. I've added bell peppers to them. They do change the taste of the dish to what I remember eating but in a way that is noticeable to DH and I, our children don't know different. I buy things like red cabbage, orange and purple cauliflower, colored carrots wherever and whenever I can. I used to cook exclusively with red onions before COVID only changing now because of lack of occasional availability. We eat beets, eggplant, radishes, sweet potato a lot too. "Bulking" up comes in ways where I include black beans or zucchini universally in every chocolate baking I do except mousse. Using pureed white beans as a base for all white sauces instead of the usual. I grind vegetables a lot into curries which is how we eat mostly if I cannot find a way to "logically" use it. It probably sounds stupid and cannot pass the logic of anyone except me but I do it quite a lot to "bulk up". Vegetables mostly are cooked with beans or pulses and even meat will be cooked with vegetables. It is partly my culture and partly how I "bulk" up. I also believe in eating bitter vegetables. So I try to include them wherever I can. PreCovid I used to use a lot of salads and raw vegetables. But not now. So I started cooking with salads and treating them like I would treat greens. Trying to grow our own salads now but not much success so pretty much everything we consume vegetables wise is cooked.
  4. Childcare rates matter to me more than nursing homes because that is an indication of what will happen to schools with me. That will directly impact number of cases and hospitals in my state. We have decided to homeschool. Most people cannot. A vast majority of children will have to go to school.. You can isolate nursing homes, how do you stop the school spread happening if a small segment of day cares is contributing to the rise in a way that is measurable ?
  5. Your inferences are spot on. Day care cases are on the rise.
  6. Scrubbing bathrooms while pregnant ?? 😱Where is the bowing low emoji ?? @barnwife, you astound me. I treated both my pregnancies like I was sick. I was never that active at all. Yay for 30 weeks. You are down to the home stretch. @IvyInFlorida Glad you had your swim. Hope you have nausea free days ahead. @soror Glad you slept well. I get so much information from your posts and this thread about what to watch for. Thanks. @Ali in OR Sorry you did not sleep well and the anxiety. Naps are good. It is tough being a grown up. We can only control what we can. Did a family bike ride and played with DS. DH has had his PT moved home now. He has been given a bunch of exercise equipment including dumbbells which we already have and exercise bands. Don't know who is paying for them. Perhaps insurance ? Anyway, he has also been prescribed exercise so we plan to do it together. Weather is holding out here surprisingly. I will take all the good news we have because the cases are rising at a rapid level and we have withdrawn again in our bubble. We can only control what we can.
  7. I got this chart in an email from our doctor. Another with ways to increase your immunity. Did not happen in March during the first lockdowns. Now because of the spike i see this chart everywhere. All this is useless unless someone bells the cat and puts a foot down on this. Which is the governor. Height of irresponsibility. The Houston Mayor is struggling alone. I think the all Masks mandate came down last week because of this. The Texas Medical Association withdrew as a sponsor/ advertiser in this convention. All other conventions are cancelled. Until this ridiculousness is put a stop to all the charts will not save TX. Attitudes will do. Starting with taking this convention online. But that is a whole other conversation.
  8. In our culture, there is a specific title for Mil and Fil so initially DH and I used to call each other's parents like that. It approximates to our language version of aunt and uncle. In my culture we don't call elders by first name, it is considered disrespectful. We call them our language's version of aunt and uncle The first time someone called my mom, mother other than my brother and I is DH. My mom was the person in the room with DH when DS was born. He was so overjoyed on becoming a father he called my mom the word for mother. He became conscious later and reverted back to the original name for mil. However, that struck with me and I had a conversation with DH where I said if he wanted to call my mom by a version of mom, I would not object and I would do the same for his mom. It applied to our dads as well. Calling my mom and dad by a version of mother and father came naturally to DH. Our parents and inlaws stay with us 6 months at a time , alternate years so it is not like we can avoid each other. But for me, it was hard to do so because I honestly was prejudiced towards mil. Let's just say DH is very disciplined and I am not and he gets that from her. So I always felt self conscious around her and could not relax around her like I would with my mom. DH never felt that with my parents, but I did with my in-laws especially mil. Calling them a version of mom and dad, brought us closer.
  9. @Ali in OR Thanks for the pictures. Beautiful places to walk are a blessing. @soror Great temps. Walking/biking anything sounds good. Hope you enjoyed your yummy lunch. I love how you toss Hsing into the mix. Hopefully that would be us soon. Glad you had good sleep. @wintermom Haying again ? Tennis sounds good. Glad you had a day of rest. @happysmileylady Water walking and swimming both count. @Jenny in Florida Never knew virtual walking was a thing. Looked it up. There are all sorts of city tours and urban trails. Thanks for pointing me towards that. @Matryoshka Wow at the information. Never knew or bothered about that. Our weather is very surprisingly good. Took advantage with a walk and playing with DS outside. DS played jump rope with DD. I feel better running and playing than jumping rope. Weird.
  10. Here comes the sun by The Beatles Good day sunshine by The Beatles Beautiful Day by U2 If it makes you happy by Sheryl Crowe Would you be Happier by The Corrs Nothing else Matters by Metallica (especially the version with the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra) The Best Day by Taylor Swift This is not in English, but in Hindi and is one of the very first songs for which AR Rehman, the composer of Slum Dog Millionaire ever composed music for. It talks about little desires and small pleasures of a simple rural girl.
  11. I use leftover grilled chicken to make it. It is already seasoned with some sort of spice mix like asian indian chicken, ras-al-hanout, jamaican jerk, baharat. most often. So the chicken is already spicy. Chopped chicken, minced red onion, very finely chopped celery, deseeded cucumber, bell pepper, radish, sushi ginger, shredded carrots, . Peanuts for crunch. Dressing is a mixture of coconut milk, lime and cilantro. Tortilla strips if people want or broken pieces of indian pappadum which is a crisp flatbread.
  12. Eleonor Rigby - The Beatles Sunday Bloody Sunday - U2 Eric Clapton - Tears in Heaven Something in the way - Kurt Cobain Where were you when the world stopped turning - Alan Jackson Rehab - Amy Winehouse Used to Love you - Gwen Stefani You ought to know - Alanis Morisette Long Night - The Corrs Apologize - One Republic Fix You - Cold Play
  13. The usual bike ride and elliptical. It is monotonous but I am glad for that. Just want a routine. I am ok with change just not lightening fast. With all that is going on, I would love one part of our life which is exercise to be on auto pilot and we finally seem to have that. Have a good day ladies !
  14. I think fear, lack of information on what it actually is and an overactive imagination have kept me from venturing out. DH is a gym guy, not an outdoorsy person so though we travel it is more to cities and their attractions vs nature. We both have never ventured into anything resembling camping or anything outdoor. The tip about the local urban trail is a good one. DH and I can navigate cities quite well without google, with just a map. We depend on landmarks of buildings and signs a lot to navigate which is not there in the woods. I just want to know where to start. Right now though I've bought a book for the kids and me to learn about local birds, identify bird calls, tree names, wild flowers and so on. We bought a binoculars for bird watching. We have started a small container garden. Even suburbia has so much nature when you look for it. I know a bit about wildflowers because TX has so much of them. I've been very fortunate when it comes to seeing huge animals in the wild. We have a nature preserve in India where the only way to go in the forest is on the back of an elephant. I've also seen a python eat a deer live, a tiger live, whales in the wild in the US, touched a dolphin. While all those are exciting and incredible experiences, they are one off. I want to incorporate nature as part of our lives, not just incredible beings in the wild, but the ordinary birds and animals that make up our backyard. I can't even identify a robin or even know if TX has them. I want my kids to grow up knowing about these things. You once said something about going into the woods to have nature saturate your senses. I've never heard of something like that and it sounded incredible to me, I've always walked with headphones on. Now I do not, only the chatter of DD when we both walk. But I am more aware now and thank you for that.
  15. Not too late at all. My son and his friend started picking up each other's languages just by hanging out with each other. Ours is an Asian Indian language and our neighbor's is Spanish. Both are 13 and 14. They do not have fluency and they picked it up entirely from speaking at home. I started picking up Korean and have gotten enough fluency so I can understand ok and read a bit. My goal for my kids was fluency so from when they were babies I sing, spoke and even soothed them in the language. So they picked up understanding at a very young age. But since we wanted English to be their primary communication language we stressed on that a lot. So their proficiency in speaking in our language came later. I would say keep speaking to them in Spanish, even if they do not reply let them understand. Slowly words will creep into the vocabulary. My son and his friends speak a mixture or Spanglish and our language to each other. It's amazing to see. They were not intentionally immersed. Just hung out from kids. Children pick up languages more easily. I would recommend listening to songs, watching movies and even the news. Not late at all.
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