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forevergrace

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  1. The psychologist who performed the evaluation was not even present during our meeting. I also spoke w/dd's old teacher who was really surprised that the psychologist was not there. She has worked with her for other children that were tested and told me that the psychologist was always present at the parent meetings(she knows this psychologist personally). Her concern being that dd's school was not paying her. I'm not sure how charter schools work with payments for special educations. I do know it would of been different if dd had been tested in a public school. I was not even aware of all the subcategories in memory, or what nonverbal learning disabilities were. I also know that I have been worried about our beliefs that dd's problem were only related to just dyslexia. The neuropsychologist has worked with the public school system for twenty years, her specialty is working with children, and I feel that we need to find out everything. DD also told me she was done the evaluation at school in two-hours, she didn't wear her glasses, and given the depression she has been experiencing I'm not sure we can count on anything. Budget cuts are rapid in our state, and many children are going to feel the outcome. We rank 49th---bottom of the barrel for education and mental health. I thank God that we can manage the payments, and that I can stay at home with dd, because I am really aware of so many that can't. Whatever it takes we have to do it, and I really feel fearful, worried, frustrated, and sad, but I have to believe God will provide the way even when I can't see it. I say this to remind me, not to preach. DD and I went to have coffee w/a friend and her daughter last night, it was the first time dd has laughed in so long. I realized how stressed we have all been, and how much I wanted everything to be o.k. I just have to stop and breathe, because I can run with this nonstop in my head. Thanks for listening!:)
  2. Hi Sandra~~ it sounds as if you are talking about my dd (13 will be 14 next month). We suffer same issue w/brushing teeth, and the fact that if I don't sit w/her she will never get her work done. For me I think it was easier when DD was four-years-old. I jokingly told my friend that I better never get sick and die because I don't think anyone else would be able to pick up the slack w/dd and she would be lost. I've also thought that it was connected with hormones, however I've begun to wonder if we correctly diagnosed dd in the beginning (dyslexic). We are in the process of fixing that. This year has been exceptionally hard for dd, and hard for me watching it. It really could be that the hormones add a different twist on things. Looking back dd started her period about just over a year ago and that is when her mood swings became more intense.
  3. I do know that Saxon Math is really intense. DD's school is using it and she is in 7th grade. DD would have anxiety, meltdowns and stress when she was doing homework. The school quickly decided she could not keep pace with the grade level they were in Saxon and moved her into 4-5th grade math. Good luck!:)
  4. I can't offer much help as I am just beginning this process with the neuropsychologist. But I can relate to your feeling of discouragement, and feeling like how could you have not done something sooner. DD hates school at this point, and I am keeping her home for now. It is really hard!!! Sending you hugs and prayers.
  5. Sorry I have not gotten back, I have just been trying to work through all of this. I've contacted several specialist in our area. I've contacted a neuropsychologist who will be able to see DD in June. She also does psychoeducational, psychological evaluation, and has worked with children in public school, non-profit agency and private practice settings. She is board certified and certified as a school psychologist by our state. She spoke on the phone with me for 45 minutes, and agreed that DD's scores did not jive. I also found out that there are two Woodcock-Johnson tests, the one DD had taken (WJ-III) does not go over well for children with dyslexia. The other can be used to examine and work with a child who have dyslexia. I also spoke with educational specialist who can help us learn how to teach dd and work with her after the results. The educational specialist has worked in the past with the neuropsychologist with other students. This is costly, but it is the only way I feel we can actually figure out what to do, and this something we should of done long ago, I just wish I had known I thought we had everything going o.k. We really don't know to what level of dyslexia dd has or it is compounded by other factors. All I know for sure is that if we don't do something we will be sitting here next year with the same issues. The school had said DD has short term memory problems, however I've now found out that there are several categories under short term memory. The psychologist who performed the test was not at our meeting on Monday, and I was told she that she should of been there. I didn't know this at the time, only the school psychologist was there along with her teacher. The school psychologist had difficulty explaining things, and difficulty reading the evaluation. Most days she is out of DD's school by 11 and does not work on Fridays. This is the woman (the school psychologist: SP) that is suppose to be working with all the children that have IEPs in dd's school. While explaining the test results she (SP) kept reiterating how slow, bottom of the line, and very low DD's test scores were, that she really is without her saying it "dumb" but not dumb enough in their eyes to qualify for help. At first I thought this was just my thinking, but after Dh and I had time to digest all this info. we both felt it. Come to find out that there are only two children in 5th, 6th and 7th grade who have IEPs. The SP was pulling DD out of class to work on her math. Originally, both her teacher and the SP wanted to pull DD out of class for her other subjects and dd wanted to stay in class. When I asked the teacher why she would not let DD take the spelling test with her class, she told me that she and SP would do what they thought was best for DD. DH called the school and explained that he wanted his DD to be able to take the spelling tests with her class, and they were pulling her out of classes that had not discussed with us. Afterwards dd was allowed to stay in class for her other subjects, but we both agreed to allow SP to pull her for math. **Remember this all before any testing for an IEP. I started working with DD on her spelling and grammar and, making her memorize her voc. for weekly tests. DD went from straight Fs on eight spelling test to anywhere in the 90s after we started working together. All extra credit words that were not on the list DD would miss. Several weeks ago I started asking DD why she was not getting any math homework, and wrote a brief note to the teacher also asking her. DD told me that she (SP) had not really worked with her in math for three weeks. Along with the fact that the other child who has an IEP had spent several days coloring in class (all day long while other students were learning) because SP was absent and very busy preparing for the school's move. Now remember, this is a high rating charter school on the scale from 1-10 our state gives them a 9. The school that DD did so well at was rated a 5. However, there was much more verbal and visual hands on activities, discussions of current events at dd's old school. The school she is in now is using Saxon math and discussion is kept to a minim as dd's teacher does her lessons. This is not horrible, this is the way I was taught and the way I tried to work with DD. I was so consumed with dd learning how to read and write that I honestly didn't have time in the beginning to do anything else. Later on we were fighting to do work, even our nightly readings went to the side. This type of teaching does not work with her as I am seeing and finding out. I feel really guilty and sad that I didn't realize this earlier. When I hs I did not use Saxon because it was to intense for DD. At the other school DD was doing pre-algebra, and her teacher was tutoring her after school. This school has placed her in Saxon 60 (I think) it is geared to 4-5th grade. She is once again doing decimals and basic fractions. While our standardize tests for high school requires algebra, and this is something DD will be faced with next year. DD stayed home yesterday. Complaining that her stomach hurt, and her class was suppose to be bowling as an extra activity. DD loves bowling, but was said no she was not feeling right. You know I'm watching her body posture (slumped shoulders, head hung slightly down) and I know inside she is not sick, that she feels beaten down. She is listening to the most depressing music and I feel like I've failed her. This is how it was when she first went to school in 1st grade, and they held her back and couldn't figure out what was wrong. I'm seeing it all over again, the once happy girl being sucked dry. I'm keeping her home today.
  6. I am trying to figure out Weshler WISC-IV, TONI-40, WJ-III, Bender-III results. DH and I went to the school yesterday to meet w/teacher and counselor, I just sat there and felt overwhelmed and sadness for DD-13 yrs. old. Short history of DD: We hs for several years believing she was dyslexic. DD couldn't read, write and had been teased in first grade for being dumb. Using parts of the Well Trained Minds suggesting's, and teaching her sight words in a brail format DD learned. I was consistent, and we had melt downs for almost three years but DD even started to learn Latin. I enrolled her in extra activities at the YMCA, dance, etc., I didn't want her to socially feel out of it, and she also needed to rebuild her self-esteem. Finally the day came when she would fight me ever step of the way, and this was not good for either of us. She wanted to try school, I was terrified. We found a wonderful charter school, that was thirty minutes away (it was a God thing that I found this school). I didn't care about the drive, the school seemed perfect. Her fifth grade teacher was a warm and strong woman, also the vice principal. Her sixth grade teachers were two exceptional men. At the beginning of this year I was told that the owner of the school had misappropriated the monies and cuts of all kinds were going to be made. Many teachers left including both of DD's teachers. There was up to 70 children in two classrooms, they combined the 6th and 7th grades. I knew DD was not learning, to many children, watching movies during class, the whole thing reminded me of a daycare. We pulled DD who was extremely angry with us for taking her away from her friends, and became depressed. We tried to hs again, however, she had become such a social butterfly and was so happy in school that I really felt we were disserving her by keeping her home. I started my long journey of school hunting. One of her teachers that had left her school went to another school nearby. This I thought would be perfect DD would have one of her old teachers, and I felt confident things would be o.k. DD hated the school within weeks and I thought it was due to the lack of education and direction that were being enforced plus she rarely was even with her old teacher. We than tried another school, and I felt like the most terrible parent when friends heard we were yet again moving her around. Again DD had troubles, this time compounded by the fact that she felt like a failure. She just was not getting it. She was failing all subjects, and for the first time was getting in trouble in school. This happened in first grade, the trouble was DD would just zone out, she wouldn't answer questions and was not doing her work. She wasn't disrupting the class, I say this because my oldest DD did disrupt the class. So, this has always struck me as odd about DD and what they labeled as "trouble" I tried to explain to the teacher about DD being dyslexic, and I felt like she dismissed me. I tried to explain DD needed direction, left to her own she would rather do anything then do her work. She looked at me like I was a some cruel mom. She told me that she didn't believe in pushing children to learn, and a few weeks later she told me DD was failing everything. DD now hates school. I began to suspect the school that DD did so well in favored her because she is incredibly kind and sweet with everyone but me. Perhaps, I thought they let her slip by on many things. However, I couldn't get how she had made honor roll for over year, her grades were fantastic. How could this drop happen and what could I do??? I requested IEP due to her dyslexia. I felt terrible watching DD drowning in all this, she was being pulled out of class for math, and felt other children knew she was having difficulty. They did and do and this has hurt DD. I was told it would take up to six weeks for the evaluations to come back meanwhile DD needed the help with math. The results came back yesterday, she does not qualify for an IEP, however she is way below in everything. The evaluator noted that she did not understand how DD did so well in the other school when clearly she falls so far below, but missed the standard deviation of 15 in a point in two areas. This whole thing is surreal, as I sat there with DH I thought this can't be right. We have to do something, because at this rate she will not pass next year, or pass the required tests for high school she is barely passing this year. I was informed yesterday that DD will be one of the first groups of children that will be required to pass the standard tests. I am guessing that in prior years you could continue to take the test once you were in high school. I Thank you for listening and sorry this is long.
  7. I think the "I hate you" was the worse statement dd(13) said to me. It seems to be a common statement that these children make. I didn't homeschool dd(26) I had to work. I really thought homeschooling my next child would help ensure she would grow into loving person. It is and has been different, challenging, wonderful, crazy, and frustrating. Homeschooling has also binded us together in whole different way. I know one is never suppose to favor one child more than another, and I do feel guilt about it. However, dd(26) put dh and I through such pain. I thought for a whole year she was dead, and the toll that placed on dd(13) and dh was devasting. Also, I never spent the time w/dd(26) that I did by homeschooling dd(13). My point is; I really thought things would be different w/dd(13)!! Now, I realize it is just a different set of problems, but how it hurts at a whole new level. DD(13), went back to school for about two-years, due to the battling of doing her work at home. She loved it and thrived. I felt abandoned at first, but watching her blossom, and become this unique young lady was amazing. Her teachers remarked at how well adjusted she was, how polite and mannerly, etc. I started to have a life!!!!! After I let go, and let things happen. As you can imagine, God has other plans!!!! DD's school suffered due to unwise money management. Teachers that I grew found of and trusted began to leave through out the school year. Finally I had to move dd into a different school. That lasted for three weeks, and she wanted to be homeschooled. I did not want to go that route again, but knowing her and seeing things fall apart around her I decided I would do it. This was against Dh thoughts, he remembered the arguing and fighting. However, he said he would support my decision. Two-weeks into it, and I soooo regret it. The constant nagging for her to do her work, hand her work in, do her chores, get up for school in the morning. She certainly was not like this at school. The sloppy half-done work, rolling eyes, the "I hate yous", slamming doors, the "I'm ruining her life"!!!! Friends tell me that the real test of a child is how they are outside the home, and of course they will say things in the home because they feel safe. I don't know what to do or think at this point. I do feel trapped, resentful, sad and angry at any given point in the day. I don't like the way she talks to me! Most importantly, I was just figuring out what I wanted to do w/me!! (I know that is selfish). ~~Kim (forevergrace)
  8. Lisa~ I'm sorry for what you are going through! This really is a difficult time compounded by your dh being ill. I am also having the most difficult time w/both my adult daughter and youngest daughter. I don't know if that helps to know that your not alone~~I hope it does. A friend sent this to me this morning to inspire me: "Setting My Own Course" Today I will realize that I am powerless over other people's expectations of me. I will think about what I want and consider that how I respond to others' needs will affect the course of my life. I will own my own power and choose the course that's right for me. Thinking of you!
  9. We have not given our daughter tetanus injection and we live in the desert and are out- doors most of the time. However, I can't really give you valid info. on this injection with the exception of finding out what is in it, and what is it mixed with. I wish I had of known all that I know now, or when we stopped vaccinating. DD had several years of vaccinations before I became educated. As for the tetanus I would look into what else is in the shot; mercury, formaldehyde, etc. I'm not sure what is in it, however I do know that those beauties are in others. I always worry if I'm doing the right thing, you do have valid reason w/your love of outdoors. Good luck in your decision! Let me know what you find out! Our own science reality w/vaccines. Our new dog has had no vaccinations, w/the exception of state required rabbies shot. I can tell you there is a difference from him and our others (who have all be regularly vaccinated) from his weight, bone structure, to many other things. He is totally healthier. Several of our dogs have had short lives, due to bone disease, cancer, and loss of eye site. One made it to eight-years of age, but sadly two died by five. A friend told me long ago to take a look at the life expectancy of our animals today compared to 25 years ago. When I did, and I realized our (family, friends) dogs use to lived 12-15 years when I was growing up, and we were not vaccinating from the moment they were born. Not to mention they didn't have cancer, and a host of other health problems, maybe you would hear about one remote story.
  10. I have not really joined the group, but I had to declutter my whole house before Christmas. We (another family and I) had been planning a garage sale for two-years. I'm not joking, really two-years, and I had been storing everything I thought I'd sell in the garage (bags and bags of clothes, toys, books, stove, etc.). My garage looked like one of those hoarder shows. My husband had to shimmy down the side wall to get to his motorcycle, the other two could no longer fit in the garage. We had a huge sale in the first week of Dec., everything left over went to Salvation army, plus I wrapped up my collection ofl glass angels and other little figurines and dropped them off at nursing homes for Christmas gifts.. This was really stressful. Mostly the two weeks prior to the garage sale, and the clean-up from the sale. However, today I can actually walk in my garage. It's amazing, and it is clean!!!!!!!! Good Luck, because I really had a hard time throwing things out. Right down to my daughter's toys.
  11. Trader Joe's carries a variety of hummus, in the fridge section (letting you know-if you run out of time)! :hat:
  12. Check out the Clean Program by Dr. Junger. Their web site has fantastic meal plans, recipes, support, and much more. I did followed his thirty day plan, and continued on for another month. I really felt amazing and lost bloat due to gluten and dairy, however, that was two years ago and I've slipped back into some old food habits. Holidays are hard, because of baking!!!! I still manage to watch my sugar, and stick w/stevia. Good Luck!!!! Dr. Junger also has the Elimination Plan, easier than flying into the the thirty-day cleanse for some. I've done both and use the Elimination more often. For more info. go here:http://my.cleanprogram.com/
  13. I know Trader Joe's has gluten free chips and dips (humus-- isreally good w/fresh fruit or celery & carrots). Most of their foods that are gluten free are labled, also they carry soy cheese. Sprouts has a variety of rice cheeses that are really yummy. They also carry different snacks, and frozen goodies. If you have a hard time finding something in the store just ask for help, most of the people that work there will go out of their way to help.
  14. As a proud Mom of two, I didn't care what they sat on as long as they went in the "potty!" Hold them up, or show the how to pee squating w/out touching the seat. Worse case, take them home and soak them in a hot tub!
  15. Really, unless you live in a little town, with nothing but one market and perhaps a strip-mall, you are unfortunately gonna hear about the nasty thing called "strippers." Along w/ "pot" and "drinking" or "drunk-mom, dad." This is life, we have to explain the right and wrong. We set the example!! My dd is eleven-years-old and asked about Santa, and in the same breath explained that her friend's mother was partners with another woman. Floored was I, but, I must remember what year we live. Do the right job, and let go.
  16. Without reading any replies, I'm gonna just shot from the hip. What do we call a white person? I think as time goes on, at least for me, I point out to my children the colour of a person isn't what makes the person. Under God's eye we are all the same. All beautifully connected, all filled w/love. Oh, I sound so frightful!! I believe the titles, labels, confuse many. Even when said in the most innocent way, your are bound to get someone who has a hurt ego and most definitly will take it the wrong way. We have to get through the labels, the definitions that are associated w/them, and realize we are all learning, just in different words and time.
  17. Hi All~~Started hanging laundry 6-8 years ago. At that time we were not worried about bills. I just couldn't get over how long towels took to dry!! Present day: this has saved us a bunch of money, along w/using cold water for all clothes. I know, I was one of those who had to use hot-hot water for whites, yellows, and semi-light color clothing. Really, I share this because I was so OCD about laundry (still am somewhat) that I just have to laugh. Here, in sunny AZ, our electric bill goes from about $45.00 during winter months, to $250.00-400.00 a month during summer months. Summer for us is anywhere from March till October. Laundry is a big factor. We are building solar pannels, and laundry is one of the biggest electricity users, along w/hair-dryers. I have a sheet to calcualte the electricity we use, so that we can buy the proper size inverter, all I can say is; "Wow!!" My family laughed at us, I said we exfoliated by using line-dryed towels and wash-clothes. To me it's just another everyday thing, along with cloth-napkins, and no paper towels. I really can't wait to we start building!! Many Blessings~
  18. Mandy~Great link, I think we might use bits of it!! I love this one for math, especially fractions. http://www.homeschoolmath.net/worksheets/fraction.php
  19. Hi Sue~ I'm unsure about who "Pearl" is, but, I don't like the idea that she gave your daughter the book when you expressed reservations to her about the author. I feel she should of spoke to you first. The whole thing seems sneaky, underhanded on her part. I didn't read how old your dd is, mine is eleven-years-old almost twelve and I will probably be censoring her reading material for a few more years. ~always~
  20. I think my DH is stressed due to his birthday (today). He's, been a pain in the butt for two weeks. I wish I could honestly give words of profound encouragement, but right now I feel like whacking him in the head w/his birthday cake. I like what one woman wrote; kisses, extra nice dinners, words of encouragement, but I'm at the end of the rope. ~~Always~~
  21. Christine~ My prayers are with you, just as my heart. Please know that I along w/my family will pray for you. Much love to you and your family!!!! Always~~forevergrace-Kim:grouphug:
  22. One more thing, funny how years ago this product was really cheap (ALL Purex). The other day I was in Target, and I noticed the price went up again!!! I mean this use to be the cheapy product to buy. Anyway, I know it's not pertinent to the problem, but, it just left me wondering.
  23. Same thing happen about ten years ago, when I was visiting my mom. We both used Tide, mom, had a habit of using more liquid soap and fabric soften than required. I developed red lumps from my ankles to my knees. Really strange and weird reaction, plus scary looking. Now we use "All Free Clear," baking soda for stubborn stains, and sometimes a splash of vinegar. The really hard thing for me was giving up bleach. But, after talking to our doctor; he a functional doctor and I believe what he says, I had to step away from my bleach. To be honest, I use it every now and then. His theory was that our bodies were reacting to a combination of things or overload. The tide being the "straw that broke the camel's back!" My daughter went to visit my mom a few summers ago, and she suffered the same problem all over again. This is after seven-years of changing products. ~~always~~
  24. Gosh, my heart just breaks for you. No kidding, we just went through this w/my baby. He's not a baby, but nine-years-old. My Bear (giant-German rottie), weighs in at 135 lb. and for the last several month he's been dragging his back legs. Continually getting worse until he cries. I was sure when we brought him into the vet. (hubby and I had to actually put him in the back seat) that they were gonna tell us this is what we needed to do. After x-rays, pain meds, and a bill that makes me wish we had insurance for our animals he's home. Still not energetic and running, mostly dragging. But, I'm so grateful. I know the time is coming, and I could just cry right now. Please know you and your family are in my prayers, sending you much love and light. ~~always~~
  25. Hey Heather~~ Wow, you know I often read about your adventures. When you were adopting your daughter; the joy, the worry. I was so happy for you and your family. You are blessed, and seeing things in the light you do gives so much more to you then the norm. Be who you are (sounds wishy-washy) and trust that everyone in this life is exactly where they need to be, just as you are. Don't feel sorry for happiness at the joy you witness by going to your Ahma's (sorry if spelling is off) house for Christmas. They have all they need, maybe not what you would consider necessary in terms of material objects, but, in true love and family. Sometimes we lack the simplicity we see in others, and sometimes we wish for the simple joy that is overlooked. I know this is true for me, in both aspects. One being; we are not terribly rich, more of the "middle of the road Joe." However, I am always reminded just how blessed I am when I see others who have less, or I realize how lucky we are that we are healthy and together!!! My Mom use to tell us, "there will always be others that have more than you, and others that will have less than you, remember who you are!" ~~Always~~
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