Rebel
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Posts posted by Rebel
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I totally misread the subject line as needing a book on sex change for teen boys.:001_huh:
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1994 Ford Taurus given to him by his grandparents.
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If I knew my dh was a child molester that was getting out of jail, the best way I could keep an eye on him would BE to stay close to him. Since I am pretty keen to his thoughts and patterns [since it was I that reported him in the first place], it would be much easier for ME to watch and see if anyone is at risk than for some other new chick that might not know his full history. Ditto w/ other forms of abuse. I am not required to stay with him in such a way that I am UNSAFE [even the whacked-out Pearls acknowledge that] but I should be close enough somehow to know what's going on so I can report him again if need be.
Or I can justifiably cut him loose and let some other future victim fall prey to his ways after he has "duly served his time."
I was responding to this quote which I interpreted as your opinion and not something scriptural. It's been many years since I last read the Bible through so it's entirely possible I have forgotten the part about staying with a child molester to make sure he doesn't molest someone else. I suppose it could be a really loose interpretation of, "Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth," or the part about being my brother's keeper... Lucky for me, I'm not Christian so I don't have to live my life based on stories from the ancient Hebrews.
I understand that you would do things differently which is fine by me. I was just trying to present another view.
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Hmmmm, I'm in the process of divorcing my registered sex offender husband, because he still feels no remorse for what he did, only remorse for getting caught. His probation officer wanted me to still attend chaperone training so I could keep an eye on him. I decided that was not MY responsibility or burden. That is HER job. My son had already expressed that he felt confused by why I was staying with a liar who had betrayed us. (We were living separately but still seeing each other.)
At the very least, he has required weekly sex offender therapy and twice monthly meetings with his probation officer for 9 more years. After that, do I worry that he might do it again? Yes, I do, but I'm choosing my happiness and the happiness of my son over policing stbx. As my therapist explained to me, I'm not responsible for his behavior. I'm not here to spend the rest of my life keeping an eye on a pedophile. Am I being selfish? Maybe. Do I care? No.
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My son and I are going to LA next week to check out a college he wants to attend. We're also doing the tourist thing and was wondering if any of you have been on one of the whale watching tours while visiting the Aquarium of the Pacific. Did you actually see any whales? Any other suggestions? FYI - We'll be taking the hotel shuttle, taxis, or public transportation if we can figure it out. It will just be the two of us so no littles to worry about.
Our plans so far are:
fly in Sat. arriving about 1:00, get checked in at our hotel in Hollywood, and check out the surrounding area (Hollywood Blvd., Mann's Chinese Theater)
Sun. - we already have tickets to Universal Studios so will spend most of the day there
Mon. - LA Zoo from 10-1, back to hotel to clean up, meet with admissions counselor at 3:30 (the zoo is only about 4 miles from our hotel and the college is within walking distance)
Tue. - Aquarium of the Pacific and possibly whale watching tour
Wed. - fly to San Jose to spend several days with a relative and play tourist with him
Sun. - fly back home
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Hey now...I happen to think that a mother's bond with her son can be just as special.
Rebel - mother of a boy and no girls
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My ds has attended both Sea World Adventure Camp and Sea World Career Camp in San Antonio and I would highly recommend both. He also did some travel camping with a boys only group, Fort Smith Mountain Men out of Georgetown. One trip was a week in Big Bend and the other trip was a month that started with flying in to Seattle, taking the Inner Passage to Alaska, and working their way back down to Texas. That group is great if you have a son that is really into the outdoors and conservative in his thinking and looks. My son enjoyed the scenary, but not so much the company. There was some bullying and a Lord of the Flies mentality, especially on the Alaska trip. Ds went on the Big Bend trip first and it was fine, but the other one convinced me not to ever send him with that group again.
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I haven't read all the other replies yet, but it's JUST a restaurant, not a strip club. Would you have the same problem if he took them to a beach in the summer? They would see more skin there. As for serving alcohol, so do Chilis, Applebees, Red Robin, most steak houses...you get the idea. My only gripe would be the money if the kids had not be told in advance that they would need to cover meals any place other than fast food. Also, OP's son is 18 and I'm presuming that the others are at least high school age. (Honestly though, the age would not matter to me.)
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I've had it since April and have never had a problem.
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bump
Surely, there are more of you.
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What a nice idea. I'm looking forward to seeing what our talented mom's create (since I don't have an ounce of creativity). Already checked out Jenny's site and it's fantastic with lots of gift ideas.
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Really? I had no idea. I blog semi-regularly.
A short summary:
Dh (stbx now) was convicted this past April, a little over a year from the arrest. He was given 10 years probation, and life-time registration as a sex-offender. He also had a fine and has to attend therapy every week for at least 3 years. One of the conditions of his probation is that he can't be around children, including my 16 year old son. We had left ds with a friend while we went to court and he could not even come back home. He stayed with his dad that week while I found us a place to live.
We moved out, but dh and I were still hoping to eventually be able to live together as a family. I had more or less forgiven him, but was feeling very bitter and mistrustful. One of the things that kept nagging at me was a brief mention in the case summary of dh having a prior history of chatting online with minors. Dh claimed it was just one other minor in the same general time frame as the one he was arrested for. In August, I did some digging and was able to contact the two detectives that dh had chatted with. One had been posing as the minor and the other as the father of the minor. I found out that the prior history went back 4 years! He had even scheduled a meet, but never showed up. I confronted dh. He admitted it, said he thought I would leave him if he told me the truth, begged forgiveness, etc. I told him that I did not know if we could get past this.
We continued a strained communication and the very next week the FBI called me to tell me I could have all our seized computers back. Over the course of the conversation with the agent, I found out that ch**d p**n had been found on all the computers in unallocated file space. He said it could have been because our computers had been networked together. They could not "conclusively prove" dh viewed it or they would have filed federal charges. They did not think it was me or ds, but that would be what a defense could use. He said all the computers had been wiped, but when I got them, only 2 of the 5 had been completely wiped.
That was the final straw for me. Dh and I continue to talk as I want to support him with his therapy, but our marriage is over. I've been making payments to a lawyer and once I'm finished, she'll file for divorce.
Meanwhile, ds graduated homeschooling early and started community college full-time this Fall. I also returned to school to take post-bac classes (music-education doesn't easily switch to biology) so I can enter grad school this Spring. My classes have gone well, my GRE scores were good, I have a research professor who has agreed to take me as a student, so now I just wait for the final word (Dec.1) saying I'm in for Spring. I'll finish my M.S. in Biology about the same time ds finishes his A.A.S in Commercial Music-Performance. He'll head off to a 4-year school while I head off for a PhD dissertation.
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I could have SWORN I posted this earlier, but the thread is gone. Was it deleted for some reason or did I just not actually hit submit?
I was thinking about blogs I've read where the blogger just disappeared. Does anyone know what ever happened to the following people?
http://roadschola.blogspot.com/
No link, but I used to read a blog by a lady who posted on the old boards about 5 years ago. Her name was Allie (Allison). She accidentally backed over one of her daughters, Kelsey. The girl lived, but had some health issues. Allie and her husband later divorced.
Anybody else ever wonder about stuff like this?
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I would suggest you try and find her a better home. You got a puppy without thinking it through at all really. A dog is a pack animal. They should sleep indoors with their pack, not outside on a porch. Too small for your house? I've seen great danes in one room apartments. Not a problem so long as the owner takes the dog outside to let it use up its energy. Seriously, how can you claim to not have room in your house for a dog to sleep?
Have you done any training at all? How can the dog come when called if it doesn't know what calling means? And of course it would be aggresive, it is alone, fending for itself without a pack. It wants to protect what little it has.
I want to cry for the poor dog. Either make a radical change in your comittment to this animal, or give it to someone who will love it as it deserves. And please please, think twice before deciding to take care of another living creature in the future.
P.S. Yes this may be harsh, but I really have a low tolerance for animal neglect.
I completely agree with everything said here. What would I do in this situation? I would move the dog back inside, hire a trainer (not a vet asst.) to train ME and the dog, and be prepared to spend major time and energy training and showing the dog I love him. If you can't do that, find the poor animal a better home.
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No abuse whatsoever in my home, nor was I abused anywhere else. I admire the strength those who were abused have shown.
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I downloaded The Greatest Show on Earth by Richard Dawkins yesterday and am loving it so far. Other recent listens that I enjoyed are Middlesex by Jeffery Eugenides and The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown.
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You've had a tough time this year with your daughters and step-son. Do you think there is any chance your older girls see him, his girlfriend, and their baby living with you, and think getting pregnant isn't that big of a deal? (We'll just live with Mom.) Did you ever find out if the oldest's pregnancy scare was for attention or not?
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Oops, sorry...that would be me. I routinely tell people that my doctor's office is in the strip mall in the parking lot of the old Target. At least, it still looked like a Target before the recent doctor office renovation.
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1960's - Woodstock, smoke dope and run around naked in the mud.
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Right there with you nmoria.
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Personally, I can't imagine that my son would have even cared to stop and look through these books on the way to the children's section. (when he was younger) He was always on a mission to get there and ignored the rest of the library. The covers don't bother me (it's not like they are porn) and aren't any worse than what you would pass in Barnes and Noble on the way to the children's section there. Even now, at age 16, he's not interested in those books.
ETA: He's not a prude or anything, just considers those "mom" books.
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Send him.
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My son (15) was given both of those about 6 weeks ago. He had tested positive for strain A which apparently isn't responding well to Tamiflu by itself. He did not have any side effects.
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I may be asking a stupid question here, but what Mexico situation? I didn't know anything was going on.
Is 24 the new 18?
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
My son and I are both in college full-time and both of us get financial aid. For the divorced parents, you only have to give the parent's income that the child resides with the most. I'm not sure about when custody is split equally.