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Joker2

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Everything posted by Joker2

  1. Ugh, last week Ds had a bad sore throat, headache, and a cough. He actually made an appointment for drive up testing at the clinic at out local Kroger, but when he got there they told him to come inside for testing. He didn’t want to do that so left and never ended up getting a test (he feels better now). I’ve since stopped shopping at Kroger here since I now know they’re having symptomatic people come inside the store for tests. There’s zero separation from the store and often the line for the clinic blocks the entrance. There’s plenty of other places to choose to shop that do no testing. We’re just going on as normal as possible at this point and hoping our vaccines work. Both dc will be back to in person college classes in the fall and I felt it important to start getting out more so youngest will be comfortable.
  2. I don’t have a whole lot to add but I really don’t understand why the US can’t come up with a way to introduce these things even to elementary aged students. My first year homeschooling was 2008, so Obama’s first election. My kids were 1st and 3rd grade and we talked about how there had never been a Black President before. My oldest was absolutely shocked and we spent a lot of time discussing why that was and how that probably made all different kinds of people feel. I didn’t even vote for Obama that first time but I kept my kids up to see him win and hear his speech and we cried because it was amazing to witness and sad that it took so long. I think most of these kids will be able to understand that something is wrong that it took so long and be able to understand how white men holding so much power for so long could negatively affect those who are not white. As my dc grew we were able to discuss how other laws/power/issues negatively affected minorities, but many of the kids we have met along the way don’t have parents who do this (and many who won’t even acknowledge it). I do think it’s important for schools to teach an accurate account of history and that’s not going to be comfortable for many-it should still be done though.
  3. Shower shoes and shower caddy Comfy rug, pillows, and blankets (Ds’ room became a hangout and those things were a reason) 3m stuff for hanging pictures and lights The blue IKEA bags are seriously awesome Oldest needs a desk calendar and a smaller planner to keep track of assignments An umbrella that easily fits in their backpack
  4. My 19 year old still often has me go in with them. They also are autistic though and absolutely hate the way doctor’s talk to them. They look to me in almost every appointment wanting me to clarify what is being asked. Oldest wanted me to stop going in around 17 and it was never an issue with doctors. Neither of my dc ever allowed the changing into gowns type of exams though unless there was an actual need. Fortunately, their doctors didn’t push them to do something they weren’t comfortable with. They can both make their own appointments easily online but hate to actually call. They do fine confirming the appointment via phone but hate making it that way. ETA: Neither of mine care about the sex of the doctor. I’m one who only wants male gyns anyway as I’ve never had a female one that didn’t cause me awful pain.
  5. Yes, both of my dc receive scholarships in the spring they didn’t even apply for because professors must nominate students to receive that donor money. When added to the original merit aid, it means they will both graduate with no debt.
  6. The Alligator Farm in St. Augustine. I know they did this sort of thing when we lived there, and it wasn’t as busy as regular zoos or theme parks either.
  7. They’re not an issue at our house but half of the five mile drive to our grocery store is full of them. It’s so loud and they’re just everywhere. The store parking lot isn’t too bad but the sound makes you feel like you’ll be surrounded any second.
  8. I have never been able to easily swallow pills. It used to drive my mother crazy. I’ve tried and tried but will end up choking so don’t bother with it anymore. For vitD/k2, I use the Nordic Naturals gummy.
  9. FTR, I’m really far skinned so not positive mine actually wouldn’t look white on someone else (reviews are pretty good for others though), but my favorites are Farmacy Green Defense and BeautyCounter Countersun. I order these online. The only stores bought one I like is Sunbum (I also love their scalp one with the little nozzle for the part in my hair). Edited because I realized you probably wanted non mineral sunscreen recommendations. Oops - that’s all I use.
  10. Yes! My sister is the one in my family who is behaving this way. She has been outspoken about my dc’s “sin” of not being straight, yet is now playing the victim because they are now grown and it’s bitten her in the *ss. She is acting perplexed that they want nothing to do with her. She wants to be able to say how wrong they are but is offended they don’t still want her in their life. My dc are very aware there are many Christians who have zero problem with who they are, and they are also very aware there are people who disapprove but have rightly kept their opinions on it to themselves.
  11. This could be part of it too. I haven’t actually changed my mind on “big picture” right or wrongs. I just never considered some issues to be as big as some other Christians.
  12. Fortunately, my views changed regarding the LGBT community (and other issues) prior to my dc coming out. At some point I just realized I actually didn’t know everything and should err on the side of love instead of judgement. I fully believe God understands this and my faith and relationship with God hasn’t suffered at all.
  13. I think it’s like how my ASD adult dc says they are autistic instead of having ASD. They were just born that way and it is who they are. They are also non binary and are fine being called transgender. They prefer transgender because it is just who they are and not something that was done to them or something they have.
  14. This is interesting because it’s not crazy easy here. When Ds looked into actual surgery just over a year ago, the requirement here was still 12 months of therapy and letters from his therapist and his doctor. He also had to be socially transitioned for at least a year, as well as being at least 18. I’m a bit disheartened to hear it might be too easy to make permanent decisions in places. We all benefited greatly from therapy during those first few years (we did individual, parent, and family therapy) prior to, and in the beginning, of hormones (which we also had to have documented therapy and letters to start as well).
  15. So, dh has had deltoid/shoulder pain since a few days after his first Pfizer vaccine. I’ve been saying he didn’t even have a sore arm because it wasn’t the usual pain after a vaccine and it was a few days later. Neither of us really knew there were actually injuries like this from vaccines until today when I went to Google and read about SIRVA (I think that’s accurate?). The pain is getting worse now as well as a more limited range of motion. I’m going to call the doctor tomorrow and make an appointment, but is this something that will eventually go away on its own? Does anyone here know of things he could do to make it better? Any experience, info, or advice at all? Update 8/1 I just wanted to update this since there is so much discussion out there regarding vaccine injuries, but dh’s issue is actually his spine. The doctor finally ordered several MRI’s after nothing was working but the pain was getting worse and includes most of the arm now. Poor dh’s back has always had some issues but it’s actually a mess. The timing of the vaccine was just a weird coincidence. We’ll find out soon if he has to have surgery (of course, Covid might delay it) but it’s looking that way.
  16. I was terrified when Ds told me he had started using the boys bathroom in high school. We live in a really conservative, sports are everything, area but fortunately nothing physical ever happened to him in a bathroom. He was assaulted last year for being trans but it was in broad daylight with other people around. Now I’m just scared for him all the time.
  17. That’s not been my experience. We live in one the most conservative places I’ve ever been in at the moment, and for our dc’s high school experience. No one here has ever said a word to youngest for not shaving. The young people here today just don’t seem to think shaving is any kind of an issue anymore.
  18. So, ds hasn’t stood for or participated in the Pledge of Allegiance for several years now. It’s something he feels strongly about. During high school he was one of several who never stood for it in classes, which was always allowed. Prior to his graduation ceremony students were told they had to at least stand and pretend in order to graduate and were told not too embarrass the school. Ds was the only one who still stayed in his seat for it during the ceremony. Fortunately, they didn’t actually stick to their word but we would have fought it hard if they had tried. Neither dh, a Marine Corps veteran, nor myself were upset with him at all for following his conscience. Again, I really hate hire controlling schools have become. Also, the work and “real world” examples given don’t always actually work that way. Dh has been very outspoken and gone off script several times while in the corporate world and most times it’s actually led to change, not him getting fired.
  19. Yes! High schools seem so extremely controlling today (and they weren’t that great when I was in them either), so I can totally understand trying to finally show them who you really are. I really don’t like how that control has turned into keeping students from actually getting a diploma and graduating for these types of things. I feel it’s a huge overstep and it might even be why these things keep happening.
  20. Youngest has never shaved. Not even in high school when swimming was required for PE. No one has ever said a word. I would let her do what she wants and would be a bit surprised if someone said anything to her. I did warn mine that someone might but it never happened.
  21. Oh, I get it. It was about more than just that for him but that was the first, and early, thing we actually noticed. Kindergarten was absolute hell for him because once he was around another large group of kids he thought there was something wrong with him because he didn’t feel like them. The school wanted to have a resource officer force him out of the car for school midway through and I pulled him out and homeschooled. He returned for two years of ps but at a different school. Things only got worse from there though and we did years and years of therapy starting at age seven. He’s been off meds and actually happy since he he came out, so I think this is what’s right for him. I don’t know how I’d feel though if youngest wanted surgery for being non binary. I admit it would be difficult.
  22. I had no idea those who are non binary were having surgery. I talked with youngest and they said they were aware some do but they have no plans to and neither do any of their friends (that they know of). I also agree with those above in that neither of my dc identify as they do because of gender roles. I used to post so many questions here when Ds was younger because of how much he hated his body. The general consensus was to ignore it, it was normal, and it would get better. It obviously never did but it had nothing to do with gender roles. He is a trans male but still likes many feminine things and has no desire to try to present as totally masculine.
  23. I don’t hear or see the misogyny in youngest or their friends, and since they are non binary there hasn’t been any medical choices at all. Oldest is trans and has taken testosterone since he was 18 but he hasn’t taken steps as of yet to do anything further. He is 21 and came out at 16 and I have no reason to believe it’s a phase, so when/if he does move forward with anything else I’m sure he’ll be just fine.
  24. Gen X I was young because he was a family friend, and then about two years after high school one of my school besties came out. In the years since hs, several friends have come out. It was small town Texas so I don’t blame them at all for waiting until they could leave to do so.
  25. One of my dc is trans and the other is non binary. Youngest, non binary, also has ASD and almost all of their friend group is non binary (and autistic). 🤷‍♀️ Dh has an uncle who is transgender and transitioned while he was growing up. Dh’s other uncle was gay (uncles from both sides of dh’s parents) and dh’s father was a bit weird with dh while he was growing up because he was afraid dh would “catch” being gay. Father in law is a lot better about it all today thankfully.
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