Jump to content



  • Posts

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by Targhee

  1. Had a very similar situation with DS. He’s not got ASD dx but I have wondered sometimes - his sister got a dx just recently and they share so many traits.  He does have ADHD dx, is overwhelmed by full time school days, and prefers alone time. This year with his heavy school load he just wants to be alone making music at the end of the day. 

    I tell him he is not responsible for friend’s happiness. He is responsible for being kind, honest, and setting his personal boundaries for mental health. When his friend asks to hang out and DS doesn’t want to right then I tell him to say “I’m needing some time to myself, want to hang out [insert a better time here]?”

    Yes, I’m grateful for this friend and it is DS’s only close one, and want friend to be happy and healthy BUT I also need to teach DS that he doesn’t need to strain his own mental health to accommodate others.  This is important - he doesn’t need to mask or conform to another’s needs or demands because that person is mentally fragile when so doing could very likely result in his own mental fragility. I know this from my DD and my niece 😞

    I also try to have conversations with his friend, wish him luck with things, notice his new clothes or hair style, etc.  I can do this, which has a smaller impact than if DS did it but is positive anyway, because i am in a place mentally/emotionally to give.

    • Like 2
  2. I no longer have a boy that age but my girl that age gets around 12 hours a week of entertainment/free choice screens. And that’s on the weekends. During the week there’s about 45-60 min each day of school on the computer (BA, Typing, Language nut, and sometimes an episode of Wild Kratz or Magic School Bus), but no entertainment screens.

  3. Last year DS went to daily classes from 8-9:45 at the middle school (band and science), then did work at home from 10-2:30.  That times included his online classes, classes with me, and interest driven work.  I’m not sure how much really happened at the middle school 🤷‍♀️ so I’d guess 5.5 hours.  He also did soccer, Scouts, and private music lessons/practicing outside of that time.

  4. On 10/22/2019 at 11:11 PM, Paradox5 said:

    OP, be aware these teach VERY differently from anything else we have suggested here. Be sure to look at the samples quite carefully before purchasing. 

    Yes, they do! And it’s exactly why we love them (and why my 3rd trader is currently using them).  My kids, on the whole, do best when they know the big picture - the whys and hows and where things fit in - first. And MCT does that, beautifully, gently, yet thoroughly.  It isn’t for everyone, certainly, but it is for many for whom the “anything else we suggested” programs are not effective.

    • Thanks 1
  5. Towels - Costco has great bath towels that lasts long time. Doesn’t have a huge color variety but they are great. They have great sheets too. Not the cheap options but the higher end options (but still cheap, it’s Costco)

    Knife block - we for years had a Henkels block on the counter and it was great. I wanted clear-as-possible counters in the new house so we bought an in-drawer block and I love it! The entire drawer has sharp implements and small cutting board and is located where I do fresh food prep so it’s perfect. https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0009NMVV4/ref=ppx_yo_mob_b_inactive_ship_o0_img?ie=UTF8&psc=1

    mattresses - we have twin mattresses from Costco and they are good.  We ordered a Queen firm mattress from Sleepzz and are very happy with it. They let you no-risk sleep on it for 90 days (free return) if you don’t like it. 

    Home Goods - we have bought some things here. None of the furniture has ever been really solid, so I would only buy piece that need to look nice but won’t be getting much touching.  This is a good store for throw pillows and other soft goods.

  6. Had chicken pox at age 2 pretty severely. Reexposed at age 12 when my brother had them. I have not got vaccine/booster for shingles, and kids did get chicken pox vaccine.

    ETA I did get small pox vaccine at 23 while working in a virology lab. Just the single pock on my shoulder was intensely itchy and uncomfortable. I can’t imagine having the disease and am grateful for vaccines on the whole! Im conflicted about cpox vaccinations for all because of the loss of re exposure and the rise of shingles. But I’m sure I’ll get the shingles one when recommended.

  7. On 10/14/2019 at 1:38 PM, Katy said:

    So it's been a couple of moves since I last asked, but once again we're in a home that needs some carpet replaced.  Actually the carpet was pristine when we moved in over the summer but with two toddlers at once multiple times a day I find someone making geometric patterns on the carpet by shaking milk out of a sippy cup.  It's a wonder we don't have ants.  And I'm highly allergic to mold so running a carpet shampooer every week is not going to happen.  And, par for being in a new area, we've all been sick more times in the past few months than we have in the past couple years, so I'm unlikely to go back to the only have milk at the table rule until we're over this phase of constant viruses.  I've been one wet diaper away from taking them each to the emergency room a few times in the past 6 weeks.

    Anyway, I need waterproof flooring and I'm leaning towards vinyl plank over wood this time.  Not only because it's softer on little heads but because it's harder to ruin with a steam mop than the wood I put in most of the last house.  Home Depot's Lifeproof has pretty good ratings online these days.  Has anyone tried that? 

    I want something that cannot be ruined by either toddlers, teenagers, or movers.  Preferably chosen before Black Friday sales.

    Every flooring can be ruined - even concrete - and even vinyl.  We have LVP over 2100 sq ft of flooring. We no longer have toddlers but do have a gang of 6-9 year olds from the neighborhood coming through all the time plus two dogs.

    LVP *can* be softer than hard wood, but only if you get the type that has a soft/cushioned layer in the “sandwich” of layers on the plank. Otherwise it’s just as hard as the subfloor.

    LVP is susceptible to gouging and scratching.  How susceptible depends on the wear layer that is over the vinyl layer in the plank “sandwich.”  The lightest scratches can sometime be taken care of with a super fine sandpaper and mineral oil.  Otherwise you have to replace the plank.  With gluedown application that’s easier than floating floor (tongue and groove application) but it’s usually the floating floor that has the cushioned layer.  That top wear layer that prevents scratches is also a factor in how much the vinyl fades from UV exposure.

    Also, the embossing that makes it look even more like wood grain can be a cleaning difficulty.  It creates grooves, and things like paint can get stuck in there and it’s a bear to clean.

    I don’t know about the brand you are looking at, but I suggest getting a sample and putting it through the wringer!

    LVP is good for lots of reasons - price and water resistance are probably the biggest! But I wanted to point out the shortcomings we have noticed.

    Good luck!

    ETA we didn’t let movers on our new LVP for fear they would scratch or gouge it with the furniture. Our teenagers don’t really bother it, and with as many people forgetting to remove shoes, spilling water, and others just not thinking about the floor I’m glad we have the LVP

    • Thanks 1
  8. 44 minutes ago, Carrie12345 said:

    Mansplaining is a sexist act.  It IS the put down.

    But women jump in to explain to others when they feel authority/expertise on the subject.  It happens all the dang time. Just because it was a man doesn’t mean he was doing because his perceived authority was his manhood- in this case the authority was he’s the AUTHOR.  It can be quite rude, and is usually annoying at a minimum but it isn’t sexist unless the perceived authority is based on gender. This wasn’t mansplaining.

    • Like 1
  9. 5 minutes ago, happi duck said:

    Patrons have access to the shelf?  I've never seen that!  We always need to ask a clerk.  I'd feel funny having other patrons looking at my holds!

    Hopefully, there won't be too many mixups!

    In the three libraries we lived by previously I could grab my own holds. In our current small town library they are behind the circulation desk.

    • Like 1
  10. I agree it’s amazing! It is so great to connect to people who you feel you can relate with even though they are no one you’ve met in person.  And it’s wonderful to connect with family and friends you do know but aren’t around all the time. But I also think it’s so much easier for those of us who grew up without them to self regulate their use.  We are seeing the first young adults that had them as part of their formative years and they are really struggling.  Also, those who might have baseline difficulties with self regulation are having extreme difficulties because the phone is easy to disregulate on.

    • Like 2
  11. I agree with the above.  We generally only use secular materials.  W&R would not call it completely secular but I am happy to use it as it isn’t preachy or always referencing God’s hand and design in things.  I am Christian, but so many Christian materials are trite and overly simplistic in the way they weave God unto their materials.  This is more akin to the degree of Christian content you might have found in a public school text 75 years ago. Not much. Overtones,allusions, drawing on common culture, but not faith or doctrine.

    • Like 3
  12. 3 minutes ago, CTVKath said:

    I don't know the answer to your question but I can tell you how my daughter has done with Spellwell. She breezed through Level A/AA in 2nd grade and breezed through Level B/BB in 3rd grade. This year is 4th grade in Level C/CC and it isn't as easy as previous years. Some weeks she can spell the words correctly on Monday's pretest but then might struggle in some of the daily activities - for example, dividing the syllables correctly, thinking of synonyms or adding new syllables to the spelling words to make new words. Other weeks, she'll miss a bunch of the words on the Monday pre-test but then do fine on the daily activities.

    Hope that helps!

    Thank you! Overall are you happy with the program and how it teaches?

  13. Do you have to start with A and AA? (That was the EPS website recommendation)

    Rethinking spelling for dd8 who is 2nd-3rd ish grade.  She completed LOE Foundations A-C and I had intended to go on to Essentials with her because D looked like there wasn’t enough spelling (we’ve fairly well launched for reading).  I have used Essentials before about 6 years ago, and now I am realizing that for this girl we don’t need quiet so intensive of spelling instruction.  She isn’t a natural speller, but not a struggler either.  Can I start with level B? If no is it reasonable to whiz through A and AA? 

    Yes we do copywork and dictation, but we still need a bit more spelling instruction for her to see the patterns.

  14. I think teaching children how to find answers to their questions is important.  How do you find answers to those questions? How do you determine what to believe? How do you deal with hypocrisy? 

    Also, I think it’s essential to separate doctrine from people.  Doctrine being something you believe is true, and people being fallible even if they think they are following doctrine. There are many things I  tell my kids “that’s church culture, that’s not gospel” or “that’s organizational, that’s not the doctrine” or “if we were all perfect we wouldn’t be at church.”

    • Like 1
  15. 1 hour ago, Farrar said:

    So, there was a politician who literally said this. That women can control their flow and thus don't need sanitary products. In fact, this myth is pretty common on the men's rights boards. A lot of men seem to think that women can choose when their periods happen and how much flow they have. Timing it, of course, to inconvenience men or ask for "special treatment."

    Beliefs like this cause politicians to believe that women in prison should not have access to adequate menstrual products, that tampons and sanitary napkins should be taxed as luxury items (as they are in most states), and that students who receive free lunch should not additionally receive free menstrual products at school. At many schools, rules for teenage girls preclude access to the bathroom for long enough to change a pad or a tampon for several hours. Can you time your urination? Yes. Can you time when blood flow decides to kick into high gear? No, not always. But girls get punished in schools for needing the bathroom for five minutes to deal with menstruation.

    To the first bolded, WTH... I had no idea there were people so ignorant and clearly speaking “out of their lane.” What in the... I bet a Ven diagram would show an ironically large overlap between men who believe women can control their menstrual flow and men who believe men can’t control their own actions once sexually aroused...

    To the second bolded, first I didn’t know that feminine hygiene products were available free at schools for some. Where does this happen? And where is it either free and reduced lunch or tampons?

    To the third bolded, no not ever... I mean, I won’t even concede you can control bleeding ever.  You might be able to hold it vaginally for a moment (odds of success doing this are probably higher for younger women who have not had vaginal deliveries), but that doesn’t control flow (ie blood/tissue sloughing and leaving passing through the cervix). 

    Thanks for the information. I’m either going to get a kink from SMH so much or tmj issues from how far my jaw dropped.

    • Like 1
  • Create New...