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Unless we can diminish the impact of people who hold these views, misogyny will remain a problem for women and for our wider culture. This is why it’s so important to speak up, to leverage our competencies for the benefit of all people and to become masters of unselfish networking.

I think that’s separate from misogyny. I also think it’s a question for the chicken & egg. Our Ed system needs to be reformed, but we’ve been taking about that for decades now, so I think it’s obvious than men don’t actually want to do that, because they hold the power that can make that happen. Now they’re the ones having problems with the system they created & sustained. It’s unfortunate that they have squandered the opportunity, but here we are.

The problem is defining “upright, valuable male behavior.” Patriarchy & misogyny are features, not bugs, in conservative Christianity. Dangerous messages about what it means to be a man are rampant among conservative Christians. I don’t want them to be the arbiters of what “upright, valuable behavior is” because it diminishes the value of women. This will continue until we break the stained glass ceiling and can influence organizations. That will be hard to do as the men in power put rules in place and have wide influence on the culture & they won’t make any rules that will diminish their power in favor of women. They truly believe they are better suited to make decisions than we are.

I agree. It’s smart to be aware of this.

Andrew Tate, along with his brother, has also been indicted for international sex trafficking in Romania & Great Britain.

Managers of their Homes, Vision Forum, Douglas Wilson, Bill Gothard, Doug Philips, the Maxwells, the Duggers, IBLP, Patrick Henry College, The Gospel Coalition are all misogynistic programs & people that that have influenced many, many homeschoolers & evangelical Christians. There are so many more. Patriarchy and misogyny are very close relatives, IME. There is also a close relationship between neo-Calvinists and misogyny. Misogyny is a strong feature of the “manosphere.”

All behavioral Health and chronic pain patients have these same barriers. In a lot of respects providers are required to do what they do as a result of legislation and rules written by bureaucrats. Those were written for the “war on drugs,” which was a proxy for a “war on people who take drugs, both legally and not.” Many mental health patients are treated with a great deal of suspicion and fear. I think most practitioners do the best job they can possibly do, but I concede that there are some jerks out there too. I’ve said it before - but the best specialist to see re: medication for ADHD and other mental illnesses is a psychiatrist. After initial screenings, there isn’t much in the way of actual tests. I’ve never heard of anyone who wasn’t being treated for drug addiction to be required to take a drug test by a psychiatrist. Maybe some do, so no promises.

Ditto.

1 - I never addressed approach, nor did I intend to. For further clarification, then, it’s not typical, but it’s also not uncommon to disagree with a diagnosis. 2 - I do understand what you’re saying. You don’t seem to accept the starting point. Without the fact that a practitioner doesn’t have to accept another practitioner’s diagnosis, there would be no nuanced situations in which that becomes a possibility. I never said that every practitioner starts from scratch. That is a conclusion that you jumped to all by yourself. 3 - Psychiatry is the specialty of choice for our family when it comes to ADHD. There has been no on going testing and prescriptions are adjusted as needed. Thyroid function tests are ordered very occasionally, maybe every five years or so, based on symptoms. 4 - Insurance companies put quite a few barriers in place that make it difficult & sometimes impossible, to get a variety of medications consistently. Ongoing shortages of various ingredients have caused shortages in medications, notably some ADHD meds and some chemo meds, that make it a multi day endeavor to fill a prescription. Then there are the economic barriers with which we’re all aware of. The difference is that barriers for psychopharmaceuticals imply a moral deficit on the part of the patient. Many people don’t even realize that the drug manufacturers and a relatively few renegade physicians along with the international drug trafficking that was initially enabled by our own governmental system, have been shown to be extensive root system of the problem. As long as people in power can put & keep regulations on place that detract attention from the root system and onto the intended beneficiaries of the needed medications, the system won’t change. The rot runs deep & it’s not the vast majority of patients or the vast majority of providers who are rotten.

So - He’s not obligated to accept the diagnosis of another provider, then? My point exactly. Thank you. Also, IME means in my experience.

Also, make sure you have a family photo without him in it. Both all family present and immediate family present. My nephew’s now ex girlfriend is in the last family picture we have. It’s really distracting. All these years later I still haven’t forgotten, so it obviously bothers me.

Every nuance starts with a blanket, black and white statement. Starts. Physicians can question every diagnosis. As I said before, this is when best practices come into play. A physician looks at a record, examines the evidence, talks to the patient and makes a judgement. That’s their job - to be curious and thorough. If anything doesn’t add up - that’s when there’s a possibility for changes. Without doing this, countless people would be treated incorrectly and systemic problems would never be identified. Both you and I know, as does your family member, that this doesn’t mean they disregard the patient’s history. It does mean that they don’t have to accept the current diagnosis. IME, APPs function very differently than physicians and are less likely to take the curious route. I’ve always attributed it to training and the function of their role. I don’t know if that’s where your family member is coming from or not & it doesn’t really matter to me. Perhaps you’ll never understand what I am saying, but my black & white statement is true and I stand by it.

This is where her not being an owner in the community will be a benefit. The owners can act immediately for trespassing to prevent squatting.

Likewise my sister was diagnosed with lupus. She changed insurance and had to change providers. This resulted in her being diagnosed with and treated for RA. The new MD said he didn’t think she has lupus and over the years he has been proved correct. She’s a different person now that she’s being treated correctly.

I’m sorry your family member doesn’t think he can disagree with his peers. I think that’s weird. He must not ever give a 2nd opinion I guess.

I stand by this. It’s an accurate and straightforward statement. It’s a fact. It doesn’t mean they won’t accept it, but they don’t have to. There are standards. They’re called best practices. People with ADHD don’t jump through “significantly higher hoops” than people with other conditions. There are a lot of hoops coming from a lot of different places and every person or organization holding one has the power to say “no.” Still accurate. Still true. Still a fact. You don’t have to like it, but it’s there. It is and remains a black and white statement. Physicians are not obligated to accept a diagnosis made by another practitioner. This is not hard to understand. It’s why people are able get second opinions & why sometimes that’s a very wise thing to do, frankly. Additionally, there is an obvious difference between diagnosis of an illness and surgical treatment of a diagnosed condition. They are not the same thing. Agreeing, disagreeing or making a more accurate diagnosis doesn’t treat anything. Not being a physician, I’m not in a position to determine what tests “will do.” I also think that accepting a path that “will do” can close the door on what is better or best. “Will do” is not a criteria I use for quality healthcare. All of the evidence regarding treating ADHD revolves around treating the symptoms. There may be studies in progress to determine the cause of ADHD, but until that is determined , if it’s ever determined, the only thing to do is treat the symptoms. Antibiotics treat the cause of the symptoms. Other medications are added to treat symptoms. Comparing prescribing ADHD meds to prescribing antibiotics is like comparing “apples to oranges.” It’s very often legislation and rules put in place by people who don’t practice medicine that result in this paternalistic behavior. Reform has to start there.

No it doesn’t mean that a doctor has do it, it means that if they need to they can do it. Some things, like providing genetic test results are straightforward. A genetic test is going to present the same results no matter what age the person is when it is originally conducted. Others conditions can’t be diagnosed that objectively. The OP admits these tests have never been done before, thinking they are unnecessary or being required for prejudicial reasons, but the provider is simply meeting the standard of care for adults, and relying solely on previous test results doesn’t meet that criteria. This happens when people do to specialists and more extensive blood work is ordered to gain additional information, updated results and/or tailor treatment. The referring GP met the standard of care through an initial test or evaluation, and the specialist meets the standard of care for the specialty. Your example of repeating surgery is unrealistic. I can however, tell you that when my husband had a heart attack one year after bypass surgery they did a heart Cath, which is an expensive, invasive and dangerous procedure, not only to look for new or missed blockages, but to to make sure the previous grafts were holding and that the plates & wire that put his ribs back together were holding & in the right place. They had the images from his last Cath, which were a year old at that time, no one doubted he had the surgery, or that the surgery was done correctly, but they repeated a test that had been done before to meet the standard of care for the current situation. The attending cardiologist would have been foolish if he had relied solely on previous medical records to diagnose a current condition that has the potential for a variety of presentations and potentially a variety of treatment options.

I do not believe your son is being profiled or harassed due to his appearance. It sounds like the physician is using best practices for an adult, which are often different than best practices for children. It’s not realistic to expect an adult medicine practitioner to do things the same way a pediatrician does them. This person is treating your son like the adult he is. Here is information on what can be expected when diagnosing an adult with ADHD. Everything you’re describing is detailed in this explanation. https://chadd.org/for-adults/diagnosis-of-adhd-in-adults/# He’s with a new practice and they are doing a thorough work up to diagnose ADHD, which they do in order to make sure they provide appropriate treatment. No practitioner is obligated to accept the diagnosis of any other practitioner, or to treat a condition that they have not personally documented. His “hands are tied” by the standards he is following, and whether the standards are derived from best practices, laws, based on education and experience or any combination of those, it doesn’t really matter. A physician doesn’t have to adjust their standards for any of his patients.

There is a small variety of gardenia that I had a lot of success with in that climate. It needed an annual trim, but other than that I ignored it. I see them at Lowe’s pretty regularly during the summer. I found this plant finder. You can customize the many filters to get a list of ideas.

I think it's weird the people from the home were driving around looking for her. I would think they'd have a elopement plan that would be more effective than that. But, maybe not. I recommend getting the police involved every single time. Then, find out what type of license the home has and which government agency has oversight. This will depend on the state and how the home is classified from a licensing perspective. Report any incidents to the police, then also report them to the licensing agency and the ombudsman for the home, if there is one (that will depend again on how the home is classified). This way you can get multiple eyes on the problem. Also, don't hesitate to ask the police if they will file a report with the overseeing government agency and clarify which agency that is. They probably already have that information on file, or are able to easily access it. It could be a "one off" for the group home or the particular person, but even a "one off" is a serious problem when safety is concerned. Thank you for looking out for your neighbors like this! And just an FYI for everyone: The correct terminology is eloping, not escaping or running away.

Yes, send it back. You’ll be happier in the long run.

Then you should realize that there are others like you as well and not assume others are stupid. No one has a monopoly on knowledge & experience.

Quote honestly, you’re living in a fantasy land. Very few services are available for adults with autism. There is very little public funding available once a person leaves the public school system. Private help, when it’s even available, is cost prohibitive for many. The wait lists are years long. This is true even in the most populated, educated and richest cities and states in the country. As mother to an adult son who has “high functioning” autism, this entire thread is mind blowing. Do people really think we family members have made it all the way to adulthood without understanding what autism is, the diagnostic process and what interventions might be helpful? We have spent hours upon hours in various appointments, on the phone, researching and advocating for our loved ones. All of this is done in addition to actually loving and living with a person with autism. We engage in social skills training & executive function support constantly. It never ends. At times we are exhausted. It takes a lot of arrogance to state the obvious under the pretense of helping. People have been jumping to a lot of conclusions. I’m left wondering if people really think we’re that stupid when it comes to the needs of our adult loved ones. Really? Scarlett did not ask for advice on what helps & supports are needed. He has involved parents. He has an extended family that cares & is supportive as much as they are able. A lot of energy has been spent here jumping to conclusions. Of course Scarlett didn’t provide every single iota of context. Not only has she been posting about this specific situation for a while, she is also not obligated to provide enough context for any one of us to understand the situation fully. As mature adults we should all realize that we never know the entire story about anyone else’s life and what’s more, we are not entitled to it, even when they ask for a listening ear, support or advice.

NM