Cute topic! Our quotes are not always accurate, but we know what they're from: What About Bob?: "I'm on a vacation! A vacation from my problems!" and "I'm sailing! I'm a sailor!" O Brother, Where Art Thou?: "We thought you was a toad..." Pride and Prejudice: "If I had studied piano, I would have been a proficient." Jane Eyre: "I declare the existence of an impediment!"

I would check local news and local Facebook news (if you have a feed that tracks 911 calls and current emergencies). If nothing wonky is going on, and authorities are not issuing warnings, I'd just go about my daily life.

I think you're doing just fine with your difficult person. You still come around, but you limit exposure and refuse to buy in to her worldview. I know it bugs you, and it might always be that way because you don't have the same worldview. Good for you. You might come up with a catchphrase to repeat, just like the complaining about age/everything is her catchphrase. "Yes, Mom, I see that getting older has been hard for you." or "Yes mom, I see that it has been difficult for you to age gracefully."(might be a touch snarky). Or, "I see that going out in the rain has been stressful for you." She's trying to pin the difficulty with aging (or anything she complains about) on you. I'd put it right back on her. That it's her difficulty. She won't change, and you may not want to engage, but it might help you deal with her.

With my dd I sent a full high school transcript, but all her "current" 12th grade classes were listed as "in progress" with a note saying they'd be completed May 2022. If you split the year into semesters, put her 1st semester grades, and then put 2nd semester grades as IP* (*in progress). ETA This way the colleges can anticipate what her final credits will look like.

I’m sorry for what you have to put up with, but I must admit that I look forward to your play-by-play posts😂

Not to steal anyone's thunder, but my dog has appeared in several Just Labs calendars over the years! See above.

Not about Costco, but I started using Zenni for glasses. I was wary at first because you order online and the glasses are inexpensive. You need a prescription from a doctor, and you can add on different tints and lenses. If you upload your picture, you can see how the glasses look on you. . I will never go back to expensive (Walmart and Costco) glasses. I’ve ordered two pairs from Zenni and I’m very happy! sorry just saw that online doesn’t work for you. But maybe someone else will see this😁

I think the pants are fine. I wouldn't wear white or cream on top, either. I like the pink/burgundy/red, or some other nice color. (I got a "Thanks for everything! It was great!" from a guest at a recent wedding because they thought I was part of the staff. I seem to give off that vibe, but in future I'm going to try to add some color to my wedding attire😁.)

I would try to start to cultivate a relationship with them for the sake of their children. At some point, as the kids grow older, they might need to know that there are kind, loving people who don't act and believe as their parents do. As young adults, way in the future, the kids might need a soft space to land, and to know that their "weird aunt" (you), might give a different perspective, and you could have thoughtful conversations with them. I have seen many kids like this reject their parents' extremist religion and politics. It didn't always go well, but it has helped for the kids to see that some good people in their lives don't participate in their parents' worldview.

Praying for him and the whole family

I had pelvic floor pt , and did kegels and such. Didn't seem to do much. Then I read somewhere (sorry, no link) that just doing a variety of basic squats would take care of it. I started doing body weight squats, different stances like: feet hip width apart, sumo squats, forward lunges, etc. Nothing too radical, but I did them consistently. It fixed the leakage problem. I still have prolapse, and some intimate pain, but I'm happy with the results overall. Good luck, and I hope you find something that helps you.

Also, the Wise card is a Visa debit card, so it’s accepted just about everywhere.

My dd20 is doing study abroad in Japan this year. She got a Wise card and it has been wonderful. You get the card for a $9 fee, and then you put money onto it from your bank account or a credit card. Then you can convert your money into many different currencies with a very small conversion fee. I have used it to convert to Japanese yen for my daughter, and I also used it for Euros. They mail you a physical card, and you download an app on your phone to make deposits and conversions. It has worked really well in Japan, according to dd.

Look at Okinawa. We’re going there in March at the end of a Japan trip. It looks tropical, interesting, safe, and relatively cheap.

^^^And this is the toxic loop that is running through your friend's brain. You can't use a healthy communication style, because she will see it as an attack. Best to not engage at all.

It’s like she’s playing a game with you and she keeps changing the rules. At first she said if you’re unwilling to reconnect on her terms, no worries. You basically said that you’re unwilling to reconnect on her terms, and to give it more time. And she accused you of being controlling. But she gave you the option that you took, and now she’s mad. I don’t think she realizes what she’s doing. She’s hurt, depressed, whatever, and sees your interactions through a lens that doesn’t make sense. It’s her, not you. She is trying to set boundaries, but is not doing a very good job with it. You set a boundary, and now you’re getting a reaction. I’m so sorry. I know this has to be baffling and painful. I would cherish the memories you have with her, but don’t put a whole lot of energy into the current relationship. It has changed and may never be what it was. It’s ok to grieve what’s gone.

I wore Keen shoes for years until my feet got better. Now I still wear Keens most of the time, but have been able to wear some Brooks running shoes as well. I have Morton's Neuroma in both feet, arthritis, high arches, and I used to have general pain a lot of the time (much improved). This has helped considerably: 1. I wear Keens or other shoes with a wide toe box and good support. I buy new shoes every six months or so. 2. I use Superfeet insoles with glycerin insoles on top, plus a metatarsal pad on top of that. 3. I do ankle and foot exercises every night, and then massage each foot using lotion. I have done this religiously for about five years, and I am much better off than when I started. Podiatrists have been of no help at all. I have had to cobble together this regimen on my own. But it works for me! I hope you can find relief.

I think your plan to charm her is a good one. I have won over a few grouches using this method. Think of her as a future friend who is having a rough day😁

You will never win with her. It's good you took over the food; you aren't being selfish, you are being kind and solving problems your mom refuses to acknowledge. You have come a long way, but she is still jerking your chain by having you second guess all your decisions. I think you handled everything beautifully. Now just stop over-analyzing everything, and say, "that's just mom being mom." You are a good daughter, mom, and wife. Hold those boundaries, and keep doing what you're doing.

By all means, give the uncomfortable people an option to do something else, then leave it up to them whether they do it or not. Games, crafts, making cookies, putting together gifts for charity, watching a movie or a game, anything. I am usually the person who has to endure drunk conversation at social gatherings, and having something else to do is a godsend. At some point, the really uncomfortable people are going to stop attending.

I’m glad it went well and that you are happy with your decision!

Then you start calling them on it every single time. “Oh, I heard you say …” Eventually, they should settle down. If they don’t, you may need to bring it to the attention of the supervisor, especially if they are talking about kids this way. Do you have anyone you can trust in that school? Maybe confide in them and ask for advice.

I agree with goldberry. Look up Jefferson Fisher videos. He gives ideas on this sort of thing. One way is to ask them to repeat the hurtful remark, especially if they mumbled it the first time. Another tactic is to ask, “Are you ok?” Don’t stoop to their level; stay polite and professional, but have some responses that you’ve rehearsed. You will come across as the sane and mature person.

Your ideas sound good. Maybe gourmet hot cocoa packets, some chapstick, a nice pen, some hand warmers, gum or breath mints.