Dryersheet
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Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
I want to say thank you all so much, from the bottom of my heart for all this kindness, advice and sharing of experiences. Also, I would like to apologize for taking so long to come back and respond. I read each response as they came to my email and I have gone through and written down suggestions from each one. I have put some into place already. I feel like I went to a personal conference with very helpful big sisters who told me what to do to make things better. (& it helped) I am not sure how things unfolded as they did, but God lit a neon sign that pointed me toward signing all of us (the baby to my lone high-schooler next year) up for a one-day a week, partial day co-operative type school (like classical conversations, catholic schoolhouse, etc). My high school student took part this year for a few classes and I was really happy with it. I do not know how it happened, really, but I feel much more at peace with this decision. a few things pointed me in this direction (which was not what I planned, at all) & a few things have confirmed that this is probably the right decision! I even signed up to teach a class. My husband seems quite happy about it and I think it will be good for us. I realized that what I want is a clean house (I wish it were bigger- who doesn't!), more space inside, and a slower pace. Quitting homeschooling would only give me the first part, possibly. So I have focused on what I can do and also focused more on looking my kids in the face each day~ realizing that I do not want to miss a second of their childhood. I think we are going to be OK now. I cannot sincerely thank you all enough. -
Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
fairfarmhand : CAN YOU COME TO MY HOUSE? :laugh: none of that advice is "dumb" to me. It is all very, very helpful. I am going to print it and think and actually answer each one and show the hubby. How would you do something like this- the teams-- would you actually write down who does what? just because I have been at this parenting thing for a long time and delivered lots of babies does not mean I have a clue when it comes to management. Also, I forget. Literally, I am not sure who or what I was and did when my first few kids were smaller. It was like a different universe or dimension then. Now it is all about crowd control. So much fun and activity and personalities, for sure, but more about crowd control and survival. My husband says it is a good day when everyone is fed and safe. I would like a little more than that... You all have been so helpful. I think I owe each one of you who has responded a therapist's co-payment or something!! I have read the forums here and there for years. I was pretty desperate the last few days and needed help and did not know who to turn to. I cannot thank you all enough. We actually had a really good day today, despite my 2nd grader losing their workbooks 2 days ago (hopefully accidentally) . My husband works weird hours and is gone overnight about 1/3 of the month (not consecutively) . So that can be very hard too, getting nighttime routines done alone. But, alas, they are in bed and the older ones have friends over. I feel like I am getting so clarity and you ALL have helped a bunch. Thank you. And I am very open and grateful for anyone else who takes the time to try to help me! -
Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
Preschool is a definite consideration. The problem I have is that everytime i leave to go drop off or pickup- the house becomes like a circus- mom's gone-- let's bake brownies! throw legos!, forgot the workbooks and color yet another mermaid coloring page-- and then i come home and it starts all over again 2 hours and 15 mins later . I will be 58 when the littlest graduates and I am looking at that with BIG trepidation....... thank you -
Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
This has been very helpful in getting me thinking. I like free school and in my mind, it is like free babysitters for all day for a few kids. Honestly, it is. But I realize there will be so much work involved in getting them ready and staying on top of the requirements of a public school. The schools in our area are quite good, from what I know. one of my adult children lives with us, but she is very busy with school, work and has her own life. She does help when she can. I would love to have some clean my house so that each morning I could just start on school and fun stuff. I would love to have someone be there to hold the baby or play with the 3year old when I am trying to help someone else learn the times tables. I have never had household help (besides the kids and husband). I think that is what I may need. I would like to be able to do little crafts and read books to my little kids. there is no way , on earth, time for that anymore :( we have sent a few to preschool, with varying results. Some liked it. One dropped out, but the $ spent and worse , me driving back and forth to preschool mid morning just was a mess and made our day so discombobulated and kids went wild everytime I left the house. -
Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
no. I have not talked to the kids about it. Maybe because now, I am afraid that the little ones will be excited to go to school and I am realizing that maybe I do not want them to.... I did ask my husband to come up with a list of priorities and he came up with a list that did not inlcude homeschooling, but I think that was because he knows that I have told him for 2 years that I am done with it. He would not put his list of priorities in any order. I was secretly hoping he would come home with a list that had homeschooling and clean house on it. and then I could ask him about hiring help and continuing to homeschool. but he did not. I know that my older kids think homeschooling is the best, as they had a wonderful childhood that they chalk most of it up to the freedom of homeschooling. -
Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
the currently homeschooled ones are 17 (graduating, so I am not counting her!) almost 15/ 9th; 12/7th;10/5th, 7/2nd, 5/K, 3 & infant during the day, I only drive one kid to a class and drop off, one day a week. Otherwise we are home ( the 17 & 15 yo drive themselves once a week to another class), so I am in the house almost all the time- which is much better for all, especially the more kids I have the husband is a big help and is home sometimes during the week. he helps clean up , cook and keeps things running when he is home. He is gem. I am a lucky lady. I have bought and sold TT twice.. I realize I probably should NOT have sold it the second time. LOL I am working on streamlining routines here. I think you are right, that would go along way to helping homeschooling work. -
Need help- big family and almost quitting
Dryersheet replied to Dryersheet's topic in General Education Discussion Board
Thank you all for these responses. They are very helpful to me, actually. Very helpful, each of them I have tried very hard to make a conscious effort to not make my kids the "mini-parents" for the younger half, as I have seen that in other big families in our homeschool community, where the teenagers babysit, do chores and teach while mom does other things. My older homeschooled kids are all very active outside the home in community, church groups and with jobs. The older 3 , who graduated, are doing well in college (one finished with an associates and getting a bachelor's next year and 2 working on their associates. I feel like, despite my failings, education has gone "ok" in general (except Math, 2 needed remedial math at the community college, but apparently that is not totally a "homeschool thing", at least not here, locally. My currently homeschooled kids are not terribly behind, all reading at age appropriate levels. Math is slightly behind- about a year or two at most (9th grader is in pre-algebra) 7th grader is in Saxon 6/5, 5th grader is in Abeka 3 and the younger ones are on grade level with Abeka. They read alot, Harry potter for the 5th grader and up (they have each read the whole series more than once. They read for fun and the 9th graders takes classes outside of the home and writes papers for a teacher there and does well. In reading all of each of these responses, I am seeing that maybe what I really need- is a babysitter or a helper. I need someone to keep the little ones busy for a few hours, so I can work with the other little ones.- 43 replies
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I need help, advice, something. I have a big family(more kids than you can count on 2 hands!)- 3 out of highschool and all the way down to a 3 year old and infant. I have begged my husband for years to put some of then in school and he has agreed to put our elementary school age ones in next year (that will only be 2 of them). I realize that i do not want them in school- i really want homeschooling to work. With such a big family, i could literally spend ALL DAY cooking, cleaning and schoolhas just worked its way down my priority list. I have been doing this for almost 2 decades and, frankly, i am pretty tired of it. But i want the younger ones to be homeschooled, just as my older ones were. There is so much pull from so many angles now- baby who needs nursing or diapers, little one who need stuff and the ones out of high school still need alot! ( i never thought the older ones would still need so much attention- but they do! College help, relationship help, resume help, car help, it goes on and on ;)it makes diapers and messy kids look easy. How do I know when I am "done" with homeschooling? I thought I was, but I am totally not a peace with my husband's agreement to put them in school. I think my begging to put then in school was really a cry for help and I did not realize it until now. I guess I am wondering if anyone has been through this or how they managed to figure out what they really "wanted" to do. Thanks for reading all this..
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I need help, advice, something. I have a big family(more kids than you can count on 2 hands!)- 3 out of highschool and all the way down to a 3 year old and infant. I have begged my husband for years to put some of then in school and he has agreed to put our elementary school age ones in next year (that will only be 2 of them). I realize that i do not want them in school- i really want homeschooling to work. With such a big family, i could literally spend ALL DAY cooking, cleaning and schoolhas just worked its way down my priority list. I have been doing this for almost 2 decades and, frankly, i am pretty tired of it. But i want the younger ones to be homeschooled, just as my older ones were. There is so much pull from so many angles now- baby who needs nursing or diapers, little one who need stuff and the ones out of high school still need alot! ( i never thought the older ones would still need so much attention- but they do! College help, relationship help, resume help, car help, it goes on and on ;)it makes diapers and messy kids look easy. How do I know when I am "done" with homeschooling? I thought I was, but I am totally not a peace with my husband's agreement to put them in school. I think my begging to put then in school was really a cry for help and I did not realize it until now. I guess I am wondering if anyone has been through this or how they managed to figure out what they really "wanted" to do. Thanks for reading all this..