We're not visiting people, nor are we hosting visitors. Not even if they stay in a hotel. Visits involve several hours on a plane or a multi-day car ride. My husband is diabetic and has high blood pressure. I'm not interested in playing the odds with his health to cure someone else's cabin fever. Plus, I don't have any relatives or in-laws near me to take care of DS11 if DH and I got sick. None of my relatives, except one sister, are being careful and they all have high risk people in their homes. We've had to have a few very tough conversations with relatives about how *if* they continue with cross-country vacation plans and not being careful, and *if* they get sick, we will not be available to help. Furthermore, if they got sick and *if* the worst came to pass, we will not be attending any funerals.

Carvel ice cream. I also babysat, but I hated it. I had no idea what to do with the kids, and it was super awkward, because the kids were the niece and nephew of my 9th grade French teacher. The baby did nothing but scream the entire time (separation anxiety), and the 4 year old was really fascinated with my boobs and kept trying to find a way to grab them. It was the worst.

I have 3 people here and do dishes 2-3 times a day. I'm over it.

You really can't enforce your rules for living in someone else's home. If I had kids over and their mom gave me a list of do's and don'ts for acceptable play, I'd make a mental note that those kids were park-friends only. I don't want to be responsible for all that.

There's plenty of square feet in this house, but the layout is terrible for quarantine. Since DH is talking about working remotely long term, I've realized that we need a dedicated homeschool room. He has the office during the day, which is fine, but any time he leaves the office, he has to walk through our livingroom/dining room, which is where we homeschool. I really need a room where I can shut the door if need be.

NY is really tight about records. I tried to get some records confirming dates of my parents marriage and divorce, and NY state would not give them to me. I have to wait until 50 years after the event OR both of my parents are dead.

Well, I was trying to give the benefit of the doubt.

It's all about power. Money, power, control. Every time my dad sends a gift, there is drama. I can only think of one time in the last 5 years where he just bought a thing and mailed it, and there was no drama.

Oh, I dunno that we should be so hard on Scarlett about this. She was trying to do a nice thing and it backfired. I've had that happen more than once, and I'm sure other people have had it happen, too. "No good deed goes unpunished" isn't a new saying.

Unfortunately, if you try not to play the game, the game just changes to a different game. The goalposts will always move. I suggest asking for a $20 box of candy or some other consumable thing that you have zero feelings about. You won't get the candy; she'll give you something else entirely, but you won't have any emotional investment in it. The only way to not play the game is to completely not care that she's playing it without you. For what it's worth, I literally had this argument with someone a few hours ago because my birthday is coming up. They asked what I wanted, and I gave them 3 ideas. They didn't like any of those ideas. Ok. *shrug* I've got soooooo many stories of loony gift-receiving experiences from extended family and inlaws. They all swear I'm hard to shop for. I have an amazon list with stuff ranging from $5 to $150, but they won't pick any of that because picking something I want means they can't surprise me. 😕

I do not do it any longer, except I'll wipe down canned items that require a can opener, (rather than a pull ring to open). Once it was determined that surfaces were a low-risk, I decided to stop wearing myself out.

I bought 5 gallon, food safe plastic buckets at Home Depot.

Aw, I want to feed Pickles! So cute!

Hypothyroidism caused hair loss for me, plus anemia, which made the hair loss worse.

Follow the interest! Allow her a 2nd year to become more of an expert on this area that interests her.

That's what I was trying to do, build a community for mom, where there would be friendship and advice, plus some events for the kids. I posted info about local events of interest for homeschoolers, hosted park days and parties, arranged field trips. I won't moan and groan about the individual issues with that group, but the general problem was despite offering what people said they wanted, attendance was often poor and people constantly complained. I asked another, more experienced mom for advice; she had homeschooled in several different states, had graduated her kids, and had a homeschool-related business. She said it was a problem with this area, that she had experienced the same thing: the moms sounded desperate for friendship and community, but they would not come to events, no matter the day, the type of event, the cost, etc. In all the places she'd lived, this was the only state where she struggled to build a social network for herself and her kids. So I just gave up on it. New leadership took over the group, and they had the same issues I had. I guess it is just a tough community to break into.

Yes, yes, yes. I briefly ran a homeschool group with a couple of other moms, and the biggest issue I had was that I could not get anyone to agree to what our focus would be. I kept trying to narrow the focus and stop being all-things-to-all-people, and eventually threw in the towel and quit. No matter what was offered, there was always someone loudly complaining it wasn't what they wanted.

He needs to be seen by a vet. Upper respiratory infections in cats can become serious quickly. If they cant smell their food, they'll stop eating, which can lead to fatty liver disease. I would call the vet tomorrow and get him in. I'd expect some combination of antibiotics, sq fluids, appetite stimulant, and some L-lysine as a treatment. Keep offering food and water, and keep him inside until you can talk with the vet.

True. My kiddo just doesn't care one little bit to write anything, lol. Not even topics he has strong opinions about. He spent quite a bit of time debating which Dungeons and Dragons alignment a given number would have. He had them all sorted out into which ones were lawful good, chaotic neutral, etc., but could settle on how to categorize zero. I would have loved for him to write it all down, but he didn't see a point in it because he can just tell me and I'll remember it for him, (so he says). 🤷‍♂️🙄

Their test was negative, but they also got a test way past the "optimal" window, so a false negative was highly likely to occur. So I have no idea if this person had covid or not. Thankfully, DS and I did not get sick. I was really blown away by the la-di-da attitude of it all. No one here cares if they get covid or pass it on to someone else. They don't consider it to be their problem if someone gets sick. It's such a callous mindset.

My go to strategy is: Block People and Pretend They Died There's swearing in it, so fair warning.

Yes, it was March 13. We had attended a birthday party in the early part of the day, and even though it was outside, I was very uncomfortable being there because I knew what was going on with covid. I still wanted to go because I really didn't know when my son would be able to see his friends again, so it was potentially a "last hurrah" for a long time. Everyone at the party was rolling their eyes and acting like covid was no big deal. We were only there an hour when my husband texted me to say that his employer was sending everyone home and if I needed to go to the store, I should do it NOW before everyone else got the same idea. So I bustled kiddo out of there, hit up Walmart, and spent twice as much as I normally do, because I really had no idea when we'd be able to go back to the store again. Kiddo kept asking "Why are you buying so much? We have all this stuff at home! Why are you spending so much money?", and I remember looking at him and feeling like I'd failed him in a really basic way. Like, how do you answer that question in a way that is truthful but not terrifying? Several days after the party, one of the attendees was like "Oh by the way, I've been exposed to covid and feel sick, so I had to get tested", and I about came unglued. I only found out because they commented on in a random post about how they wanted to go to a parent's night out dinner, but were waiting on test results. If I hadn't been looking at that post, I never would have known they were exposed. If they told the party host about it, I don't know, because no one ever contacted me to say "Hey, you might have been exposed".

I wish I had done this with some people I met early on. I wasted too much energy trying to crack the code to fit in.

I don't think I'd give it much thought? This isn't him "correcting" what you made. He decided to make more of it. I'd just be happy that someone other than me made food. If you are too sick to clean the dutch oven, then tell him "Sweetheart, I'm too worn out to clean the dutch oven and need you to do it". 🤷‍♂️

Ah, I know some of those ladies. I think of them as "Nice", with a capital "N", because they never ever say or do anything that could be construed negatively. It is a very superficial sort of friendship. I really couldn't tell you about anything they like or enjoy, now that I think about it. 😕