Yes! Ds17 also took it today and said the same thing. We've been working on practice tests in a book, and they also had 4 sections. He also said that there were some more spaces for answers than there were questions on the test. This is the first SAT that he has taken. I hope he's right!

It does sound like it could be migraines. Is it possible to have migraine pain behind both eyes? He also has a tingling sensation on the bridge of his nose. Is that common in migraines? Is it unusual to have a migraine every day, on and off? Tap- it could be his sinuses. He doesn't seem very congested, but I'm sure the doctor will check it out. I doubt it's from studying. He should be doing more of that!

Ds20 has been having headaches, sometimes severe, over the last couple of weeks. The first one was on February 13, with pain behind the eyes. It's not a throbbing pain, and it is behind both eyes. The first headache, he had nausea and vomited, but he hasn't had that since. In the last week, he has had a less severe headache every day, in the middle of the day. He is under a lot of stress. He's on his own (his choice), living with his girlfriend and roommates, working and going to the university. He plans on getting married (big wedding) in October. He had mono in August. Do you think this could be related? He had swollen lymph nodes on his neck with the mono, and one of them is swollen again. He's going to make an appointment with a doctor today. We are trying to find him a good primary care doctor. Any advice on what he should have checked? Shawn

I guess this is a common problem in fast food. Ds got a job when he was 17 at a locally owned fast food restaurant. Some of the employees smoked pot after work. I found out later that one of the shift managers was transporting drugs from out of state and selling them in the parking lot (and no doubt elsewhere). He would hire the young employees to sell the drugs (not my son, thankfully). My son stayed away from drugs (as far as I know), but he was still influenced by the people he worked with. They were young people with difficult pasts just trying to survive. Some people were fresh out of jail. Others were kicked out of the house as teens. One girl was afraid to go home to her alcoholic father. Tough, sad stories that often lead to drug use and wild behavior. Few of them were going to college or had any plans to. Ds has changed in many ways. You can't hang out with people and not have them affect you. Keep in mind, that your son could be influenced in many ways- their language, their ways of thinking. I would not recommend a fast food job for a teenager.

Ds19 got a job last year, his last year of homeschool. I wanted him to limit his hours to 20/wk, but he was given 30. He refused to cut his hours, even when he went to the university, and then dropped out of school. He is now a manager at the same fast food restaurant. He is talking about going back to school full time, while working full time (he now needs to because he lost his scholarship). Low paying jobs can be a real distraction from education and career goals. Many fast food restaurants require 30 hours a week, and teen jobs can be hard to get.

Ann- you are so right about chocolate. Have you tried Trader Joe's chocolate covered ginger cookies? They only have them this time of the year. They are awesome!

Elizabet1- yes, 30 hours is way too much. I tried to get him to reduce his hours, but he wouldn't. I think he really enjoyed having all that money. Sometimes it's hard for a young person to see the long term value of an education. Both his father and uncle were late bloomers. His dad dropped out of community college and learned a trade. He went back to school 10 years later and got his master's. He now has a well paying job in law enforcement. His uncle went into the Air Force, but had to retire due to health problems. He then went back to school and has a great job at a hospital. I know that it can take a while for kids to figure out their lives, but it is so hard to watch.

Catwoman- I didn't mean to sound harsh. We were (and are) trying to work out how to help him without helping him too much. He is a procrastinator to the extreme, and I'm sure that contributed to the problem. Although he has a great work ethic at his job, not so much with school or home. In the past I would have jumped in and tried my best to fix things, but it is just not good for him to be dependent on me to solve his problems. We will definitely help him financially, and I will give him advice when requested, but I can't jump in and fix everything for him. It's not healthy for him (or me). EmilyGF- I don't know if they would give him a year of absence, since he is not in good academic standing. He also doesn't want to go back (although that might change). Crimson Wife-you are right. It is hard to be so far away and know what is going on. We talk often, but ds was never a big talker on the phone. You have to catch him at the right moment to find what he's really thinking. He does get depressed at times, and he's perfectly happy other times. He's happier now that he has a job and friends, but it's just not going anywhere. Playing video games, eating fast food, and skateboarding are all fun, but not a good long term option. He may be happier there, with his friends. I don't know...it doubt it would make him happy in the long run. I also worry that he might get involved with drugs. If he moves here, I am concerned that he won't have friends for a while. Then he could get really depressed. It's hard to move when you are a shy person. I'm not sure what he should do, but he will have to decide (quickly).

Peacefulchaos- he is deciding whether to move in with us. He said he probably was, but I wouldn't be surprised if he changes his mind. I'm sorry you went through that with your grandparents. Ds' grandparents (my in-laws) would be incredibly disappointed. If he does come with us, I will have to leave out some info. Some things are better off kept to ourselves. We were amazingly calm with him- no yelling or crying- even dh kept his emotions in check.

Reign- I would like him to get out of fast food. I'm not sure what he'll find around here. His physical health is pretty good, I think. His mental health varies. When he has bad times, he tends to be very negative. I used to be that way, too, but I've learned (am learning) to cope with difficult times. It is important to try to be resilient- to figure out ways to solve problems and recognize the possibility that things will get better. His life has been pretty cushy in the past, and I'm sure he will have some hard times in his life. If he seems depressed, I will get him to a doctor. He is shy, but he has come a long way. He could use some coaching on making friends and small talk. He's pretty negative about changing. It does worry me that he won't have friends here when he first comes. Any ideas for making friends in a new place?

Thanks so much for all the input. I'm not sure if they will make him repay the scholarship. I hope not, but at least it's only 1 semester. It is too late for him to withdraw without failing. Exams are next week. He is studying for the 2 classes that he can pass. I know 30 hours was too much. 10 would have been ideal, but there aren't too many jobs out there that are 10 hours per week. It took him 2 years to get a job. I recommended that he reduce his hours or work only during breaks, but he chose to work. Catwoman- yes, his home moved away from him! Both dh and I feel terrible about this, but it was a forced government move. We had no choice. Flowing Brook- we are going to help him. We're paying to have his things shipped, even his truck. I'm sure we'll have to help him with his school expenses here. We do want him to pay for some things. He tends to spend a lot of money on video games and movies. If he has income coming in he needs to contribute. There will be some negotiating on this point, because dh is tougher on this than I. If ds doesn't contribute, dh will resent ds wasting his money. I also think he needs to learn to handle money responsibly. We are very close. In the past, I think I've helped him too much. He waits until there is a major problem and expects me to help him out of it. I think I need to transition from fixing his problems to giving him advice on how how he can solve them. Shawn

Sunflowerlady- management is a good idea. He's thinking of something in computers (he did some programming in high school and built his own gaming computer). He may find that it is too challenging (given his lack of work ethic).

He decided that he wouldn't go to classes the last 2 weeks (sigh). He wasn't doing great even before that. He thinks he can still pass 2 classes. The others, no. One was a small seminar, and the other 2 had a lot of assignments and quizzes. He still has that teenage brain fog- he just doesn't make logical decisions sometimes. We gave him the option in the summer to come with us and go to community college- or even take a gap semester to get acclimated, but he decided to stay. As far as the manager's job, he didn't want to take it while he was in school, because it required a lot of hours. He was already working about 30 hours per week. If he comes to live with us, he'll have to find a new job. Change is hard for him, as is making new friends. We have moved a lot, and he has lost a lot of friends because of that. He still keeps in touch, but it's not the same.

Ds19 is dropping out of the university at the end of the semester. He had a merit scholarship for tuition. He says he doesn't like it there, doesn't fit in, hates the dorm. We moved 2000 miles away last month, and his only friends are at the fast food restaurant where he works. He devised a plan to rent an apartment and go to the community college. I don't see any way he could afford that, and we will not help him. I feel so sad. He is making life so hard for himself. We told him he could live with us (and pay some rent), go to community college here (he would have to pay at least until he proved himself). He thinks he will come, but he doesn't want to leave his friends. They are nice kids, but are going nowhere. I'm not sure how to react to all this. Mostly, I am incredibly sad. This kid is great with the family. He actually likes to hang out with us (sometimes). He likes learning. He will actually watch documentaries and listen to npr on his own. He does great in his job. He got a raise right away, and they wanted him to become manager. But, when it comes to school, he isn't motivated to do the work. If we hadn't moved, I know he wouldn't be dropping out. I know it is his fault, but dh and I still feel somewhat responsible. Any ideas of how we should handle this as parents?

Betty- I think Reston might be ideal for us, but may be too expensive. Dh and I love to be outdoors, and I even drag ds15 outside for walks during the school year. Pink and Green Mom- dh will have unpredictable, long hours. Those buses sound great, but I don't know if the hours would work out. Dh is fortunate that he will have a parking spot at work. Are there any school districts in VA that are less homeschool friendly (or hostile to homeschooling)? Shawn

Thanks for all the replies! Dh's office is near the L'Enfant station, but he would prefer to drive. He doesn't like the metro. They wanted him there in 30 days, but he negotiated 120 if he goes there (paid trip) for 30 days. He has to be there in early August. I will, hopefully, fly down for a week. Ds18 will stay here at the university, and come home on breaks (hopefully). We will probably rent either a townhouse or small house (because of the dogs). Dh does not want to give away our St. Bernard. It would not work out having him at a high rise apartment. We were thinking maybe the Woodbridge area, or maybe Manassas? Reston seems nice, but pretty expensive. Alexandria is a possibility, but expensive. Are some areas better for homeschooling teens? It might be nice for dh not to live in DC, because they might call him in after hours more often. NoPlaceLikeHome- the downsizing doesn't bother me too much. Dh and I have been wanting to do this for a while. I'm not so sure that ds15 will appreciate it, though! Shawn

Hellen- yes, the chiles are awesome. We are addicted, but we usually buy the 505 brand. I'm told they even sell them in Maine! Shawn

Spryte- thanks for all your info. Dh will get a raise, but not nearly enough. I think ds18 will be very upset if we leave him. Our last move came after he had just gotten settled at his new high school. UNM is nice, but Albuquerque is very violent. I will worry about him. Pink and Green Mom- thanks for the homeschool info. Shawn

Alicia64- Thanks for the Fredericksburg idea. We will look into it. We have tried so hard to be careful with money. It would be nice to live in a cheaper area than DC. I'm glad DC is animal oriented. We have an 11 year old Golden Retriever. We've had him since he was 6 weeks old. We also have an 8 month old St. Bernard. He is such a handful, I would worry about him ending up at the pound if we gave him away. Cera- The problem with ds18 coming home on breaks is that he also has a job. It is fast food, but he loves it. Ethel Mertz- I'm not sure we could afford DC, but it is good to know that homeschooling is easy there. Shawn

Dh works for the government, and was told today that he has to move to DC (for at least 3 years). We don't know what to do. We live in Albuquerque. Ds18 is set to go to the local university next month on scholarship, and ds15 is in his second year of homeschool high school. Oh, and we have one large and one giant dog. None of the options are good. One is to have dh move to DC and rent a room. We would stay here, but for financial reasons we might have to move to a smaller house. I can't image paying for a house here and even an efficiency there. We have lived apart in the past, and we would really miss each other. Another option is for the three of us to go, and ds18 to stay here (either on or off campus). I really don't want to leave him. We have no family, no support system here. Also, I know it's harder to homeschool in the DC area than NM. I'm worried about homeschooling there. Also, ds15 has a best friend in a city near here that he sees several times a year. A third option is that dh could quit. But he has a great job, and has put in 13 years with the government. In 7 more years, he will have a pretty good retirement. Also, there are no lucrative jobs here in his field. Any ideas what we should do? I feel that there are no good options. Shawn

Debbi in Texas- I never worried about him until recently. His dad was thin when he was young. Like your son, he often isn't hungry. If we don't have foods that he likes, he just won't eat! Also, if he's busy playing a video game he won't bother to get food. Of course, if he's doing school work he's always willing to take a break! Shawn

Thanks for all the replies. I have never worried about ds15's weight, but he is looking very thin in his face. He is healthy except for some dizziness when he gets up quickly. This runs in the family, but I do want it checked out. Exercise is a good idea. He loves his video games, and doesn't move much. Shawthorne44- adding fat is a great idea. Dh and I eat a mostly plant-based, low fat diet (but the kids eat more meat). It might be good to sneak more fat into his diet. Arcadia- eggs are a good idea, too. Crimson Wife- he may be addicted to grains and dairy, but I don't think he would change. They have always been his preference. Shawn

Ds15 is 5'9" and 107 lbs, which puts him under the 5th percentile for his height. I knew he was thin, but I didn't realize he was that thin. He has always been thin, but in the last couple years he has grown a lot in height but not weight. Any ideas to put on weight? He is a very fussy eater. He does like dairy and starches and is not a fan of many veggies. Shawn

Wow! Thank you all for your many replies! My feeling is that ds should stay on campus the first year. This goes against my frugal nature, but he is a quiet kid. It would be easier for him to get involved and make friends. He does want to do that, but he also wants a car so that he can come home whenever he wants. As many of you mentioned, the university doesn't recommend that. It is expensive and inconvenient for parking. I don't see how he'll be able to pay for that, but that is up to him. jjhat7- My frugal side agrees with you that he should commute from home. He could graduate with no debt! What a great way to start life. We'll leave it up to him, though. hjffkj- I also lived on campus first semester freshman year. My parents lived about a mile down the road. My mother gave me the option of paying half of room and board, but I wanted to save my spending money. I went to a small liberal arts college for women. Many of the students were quite wealthy, even bringing their horses to campus! Although my parents contributed some, I still owed a lot in student loans when I graduated. I was pretty clueless about money. Dh's parents helped him buy his first car, but that was about it. He went to community college and worked 2 part-time jobs. His parents even charged him a little room and board. CathieC- Yes, jobs are tough to find around here as well. Ds has been applying for 2 years and hasn't found anything. I think he may get a job at a fast food restaurant, because it is someone my husband knows (through work). texasmama- ds is a very frugal as well. He doesn't usually ask for much. Right now, I think he's thinking how fun it would be to live on campus with a car. I think I will just tell him how much we are willing to pay, and he can decide what to do. He is very analytical- I'm think he'll make the right decisions.

Ds18 will be going to the local university in the fall. He wants to live on campus and have a car (we live a half hour away). I want to be very clear with him re. what we will and will not pay for. When we visited the campus, the tour guide said that parents usually put money on their kids debit cards, so that they could get pizza, fast food, etc. All this really concerns me. I am very careful with our household finances. Our big splurge is going to breakfast at McDonalds a few times a week. We are very close to being debt free except our mortgage. We are giving ds a set amount of money for college tuition, books, etc. He is going to be getting a part-time job soon, which should help. I'm just really concerned that he will expect spending money on a regular basis. I don't think he can afford to live on campus and have a car (plus, it's not really necessary), but he'll have to decide. He is the kind of kid that loves to argue, so it is best to get this settled in advance. How do you handle your college kid's expenses? Do you pay for their car expenses, restaurants, small purchases? Do you give them a set amount per month or help them out periodically? Do they have to earn the money themselves? Shawn