Know when to say when.

Shoot, I'm trying to figure this stuff out. I think the main problem is that she isn't moved out. She's having sleep overs. But because she's still "living at home", she is still your responsibility. But she's not there. So you can't help her. If she wants to be on her own, she needs to be competent. Which it sounds like she's not. She needs support and care. A husband could be expected to take on that role, but she doesn't have one. She has a boyfriend. It's just not a solid, committed relationship which will provide the kind of support she needs. To me, it seems that if she still wants and needs your help and support, she needs to physically live in your home. If/when she can stand on her own feet, she can move out. If/when she has a partner who is willing and able to take on her care, she can move in with them. She does not have that now. IMO you need to set some limits. There have to be times when she is available to you, in the home, where you can help her. If she is not willing to do that, she needs to have supports in place. If your home is not appropriate or desirable, you might need to look into some kind of halfway house, group home, assisted living type of situation.

There could be a lot of reasons. My 6yo does it. But a few of my kids have been chewers, and one was a taster, as was I. It's not necessarily a problem all by itself. But it could be an indication of a problem, combined with other things. Are you concerned about the chewing/mouthing itself, or that it's a sign of something bad?

Not in a long time. I have worked in all of the fields that I scored well in, and, you know, I guess I'm kind of done with those. I will take some see where they lead me.

We have substantial savings and D will still be bringing in some income. We should be alright with not a lot of $$. He's basically just retiring early. What does the bolded mean?

Ooh, I would like to do 911. I worked a help line, too. While it is stressful, I have more maturity now, and I generally liked it. Good suggestions. Thank you.

Oooh, I loved phlebotomy. Good idea. I would like pharm tech, too. I haven't looked into that program yet. No, we don't need health insurance.

I guess that my biggest stopping point is that I feel lukewarm about all of my options. I just don't know that I'm looking in the right field. But I don't have a burning passion for anything. :sad: I don't want a job that I dread and hate, and then bring all that misery home with me. But what can I not feel that way about?

I do have some training in BCBA, but I'm not certified. I haven't seen openings here, but where we were before, they required a masters, which I don't have. I don't love the idea, but I would consider it. We are having all of that work done on the house now, which of course won't last forever, but should last a long time. We buy our vehicles at auction. I'm watching three for tomorrow, minivans comparable to the one I have now going for $55 to $2500. They won't last long, but If I can get a year or two of use out of a $100 vehicle, it's good. We don't really even need health insurance, as we have VA benefits. I would prefer it, but if I can't get it, nbd.

All valid concerns. I hadn't considered that I would have to do lifting here as well. That's a no. The pay is low, but better than I've had in the past (sadly). I would definitely not do this long term. It's not a sustainable long term career IMO, which is why there's such a high turnover and high demand. Which makes it an easy starting point.

Caregiver or carer is the term depending on where you are. This is likely where the staffing company would put me. At least today, this is where I;m thinking I want to go. Just short term to get some fresh work experience and my certifications and trainings updated. I have spoken with some people, and they were warm and welcoming. They have a residential facility (for adolescents I think) which would be wonderful, but they also do in-home placements.

I am so proud of myself. I was in and out of Walmart in one hour, with three kids-including Luna scream-whining "MommeeeeMommeeeeMomeeee" continuously the entire time, with tears streaming down her face towards the end, and searching all over for Jay's medicine, which was sold out :glare: and changing up our usual breakfast fare for high fiber options, which I've never shopped for before. Also swapped out one of Jay's supplements for a new kind. Without a list :ohmy: And the boys needed multiple, lengthy bathroom stops :rolleyes:

Our plan is for me to return to work in approximately 2 years. I will be the main breadwinner. We will be debt-free, solar powered, vehicles paid, mortgage free. We only have to pay for food and water, and life maintenance type stuff. I'm not sure of numbers, but we wouldn't need much. I have worked in childcare, but I don't want to do that. I have worked in the medical field, but I have no certifications or anything. I HATED nursing, but I'd be willing to go back into something medical related. Maybe. I cannot do office work. I'm not cut out for it. I will be miserable. I went back to school for Behavioral Sciences. I am qualified as a Behavioral Health Tech. This was my plan, but I'm not sure this is what I want to do. I would work in a residential facility of some kind. I want shift work. 12s would be ideal. I do not want a 9-5, being away from my kids for 5 days a week. I don't want to do a masters or any more college, but I would be happy to do some vocational training, certifications, something. I will need to get my certifications updated if I go into medical/psychiatric field. I can't physically do EMT/Paramedic work anymore, so I think that's out. I could maybe do medical escort work (which I did in the past). But I'm afraid there would be lifting, and I would definitely be injured. I'm thinking about hiring on with a home health/medical staffing company. At least to get my feet wet. I haven't worked in a LONG time. Ugh. I just don't know what to do.

Unless you are the size of an 11 yo, they just aren't made for you. While I am still the height of my 11yo self, I am considerably larger in girth. I don't negotiate the equipment like I used to.

This is the week of appointments. 3 kid dentist appointments and I'm headed to the doctor this morning. and Luna has therapy this afternoon. Our extracurriculars are just getting started. Jay wants soccer, Jeff wants gymnastics (probably not this month), Ben wants kickboxing(also not yet), W wants to go to Zumba with me, as does Jay. I also need to sort out our other classes. This stuff is exhausting.

All of this except the medication. I have never been diagnosed with ADD but I have my suspicions. I don't miss my kids' specialist appointments, because I have anxiety over it, and check and check and recheck and lie awake the night before. But last month I scheduled my own appointment in the morning, followed by Jay's specialist in the afternoon. Completely forgot my own until I was on the freeway going to his. I have a planner (several) and a huge wall calendar. My kids are getting better at checking because I am so terrible about it. It's maybe my worst flaw. :sad: I also have no concept of time, so I'm often late or super early. I'm better when things are close, but not always. If I have to account for traffic, I'm screwed. Luna's therapist has been trying to work with a family for months. she has to drive 2 hours to get there, and they NEVER show up. At their own house! She has gone in the evenings and on weekends. They are NEVER there. That baffles me.

We are doing Christina Rosetti this year.

Ok. So... probably not going to work for me. I'm little and I have enough trouble managing my minivan. We would have to haul my van as well. We would be driving through mountains, San Diego, and Los Angeles. OMG i'm having anxiety thinking about it. I really want a little one, or maybe even a van conversion. That would be great.

Ack, the auction is in Minnesota. But for future reference, how hard is it to drive an RV of this size? Has anyone done it?

ah, thank you for clearing up the tea confusion. In my family, tea is an afternoon snack. I didn't know it could be a full meal. I mean, I knew it could be elaborate, but I didn't know it could be the evening meal. I'm glad to see that my Inlaws are not the only ones who eat dinner midday. It made perfect sense when gma explained it, but other people acted like she was a crazy old lady. Growing up, I thought supper was a simple, light meal in the evening, but now I know most people use it interchangeably with dinner. I will sometimes use it with my kids the way I learned it. I'm so relieved to see I didn't invent that meaning myself.

I think you are putting a lot more thought into this than Freedom did. I had a friend who was named Windy because the desert winds were blowing the day she was born. Another friend was named Wendy after the song Windy, because her parents misheard it when it played on the radio on the way to the hospital and they didn't check. Some people just don't put that much time into these things.

Just a little end of the day update. She was a little more subdued than usual, took her normal 2 hour nap, ate her meals, and went to bed at her regular time. She seems fine. She sees her therapist Friday. I'll talk to her about it. but I think she's fine, and just extra tired today. I will keep an eye on her overall activity level to see if she is declining.

We have had more blood draws than I want to think about. If at all possible, go to a children's hospital. They do such a better job with the small ones. It's an hour drive for us and worth every mile. There is nothing worse than a failed blood draw, knowing you will have to bring the now traumatized baby back and do it again.

And where do you live? I grew up in California, eating Breakfast, lunch , and dinner. In Louisiana, we had breakfast, the main meal of the day was dinner whether it was midday or evening, and the other meals were lunch or supper.

I used to be so on top of it. One of those pinterest, blogging moms. I can see it possibly somewhere in the future, possibly.