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kmacnchs

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Posts posted by kmacnchs

  1. :grouphug: :grouphug: It has been my experience that the best thing I can do for a trying relationship is to actively work at finding things to appreciate about the other person. You might want to try beginning and ending each day by writing a list of 5-10 things that you appreciate about your son. It could be things he's done or said that made you smile, nice things you've seen him do for others, the way he looks when he's all dressed up for a fancy outing, silly things he did as a toddler, etc. In other words, anything at all that makes you appreciate him from past, present or future. I'm willing to bet that you will feel better about things if you try this for even a little while. :grouphug:

     

    thank you

    I'm going to try this

    My oldest gets on my last nerve and I find it hard to even smile at her sometimes. I have the hardest time being kind to her when my parents are around - she is their favorite and she knows it (so she acts like a brat) and the youngers are oblivious to it but I feel like yelling and crying when they baby her and ignore or yell at the others. I am trying to spend less time with them in order to separate my feelings toward them from my feelings toward her but your suggestions help, so thanks :)

  2. Kids are pretty smart though. If you explain the "thee" pronunciation and that we often say "thuh" in our speech, she'll get it. You'd be surprised how easy it is to explain things like that sometimes. It is not an exception to a rule. It's a strange way of pronunciation on our parts. ;) In fact, I would be find with sounding it out in a reader and saying "thee", and as she gets better at reading, it will naturally become "thuh" in the proper places.

     

    I don't see the point of explaining the "the/thuh" stuff unless the child brings it up. I agree w/the last statement completely!

     

    We use OPG so I taught my kids "the" as a sight word at first (just for the sake of reading early on) and then later, when we were learning what 'th' says and that vowels at the end of little words say their names, they would want to sound it out (even they already knew it as a sight word)...I was never asked about the "the/thuh" distinction (maybe it's b/c mine learned to read 'early'). Now that my oldest can read anything and everything - literally - I couldn't tell you what she says when she comes to that word (and she reads aloud to me daily) but my guess is, she does what boscopup said she would.

  3. if she knows her letters & sounds, the only other thing I made sure mine knew before I started teaching them to read was lower case letters - that actually took awhile (as they knew their uppercase only).

     

    Once all of that is mastered, I agree w/others - we use OPGTR and LOVE it! It is scripted & THOROUGH!

  4. What is your favorite Discipline book? Which book helped you discipline and raise your children and made a big difference in your home life?

     

     

    I am currently reading Sheparding a Child's Heart and I am enjoying it tremendously.

     

    Don't Make Me Count to Three - builds on Shepherding a Child's Heart (gives practical examples of how to implement and great use of verses I would NEVER have thought to use when building sibling relationships, for example)

     

    There's another one that was recommended to me from here and the title is *something* like How to Stop Complaining, Arguing...in You and Your Kids...something like that - it moves beyond obedience and into HONOR (going above & beyond just doing what you're told)

     

    I HATE the titles of both of these books and would have NEVER picked them up had they not been recommended to me by certain people on this forum but they are AWESOME POSSUM!!!

  5. 2. What do you do with a child who is already reading and is becoming strong in comprehension?

     

     

    I know you have already been warned but just beware - the answer is different w/each teacher and ideals vs implementation is different as well - iow, you probably won't get a truthful answer and/or you probably won't like the answer...

     

    Here is the answer I got when I asked this question: "Oh, we had a girl who already knew her alphabet when she came to Kindergarten and she was our little helper - for example, she helped show students to the library" The teacher didnt' think I knew what I was talking about (how on earth could a child be reading BEFORE kindergarten - impossible! she must mean the child knows their ABCs...) AND the answer that was given solidified my decision to homeschool - I don't need my child to go to school for 6-7 hrs/day just to be a tour guide!

     

    good luck! :)

  6. That's what we do. I use Viva paper towels.

     

    me too

     

    1 1/2-2c boiling water (pour 1/2 over mixture & 1/2 over towels)

    1 Tbsp baby wash

    1 Tbsp baby oil

    1 tsp alcohol (keeps from molding, if you don't use them frequently enough)

     

    I just keep mine in a ziplock bag (w/the slide zipper?)

  7. I look at Sonlight, Ambleside Online, and Veritas Press for booklists of great books to read. My dd LOVES to read as well and I was running out of stuff for her to read so I just checked out all of the Sonlight, AO, and VP Kindergarten books from my library. After she read all of those, we moved on to 1st grade books and now are onto 2nd grade books. I chose these so I wouldn't feel the need to read the books before she read them (a difficult task b/c of how quickly she devours them) since I trust these curricula.

     

    I let her pick out books (her faves are babar, curious george, clifford, and franklin, but then again, she's 4) at the library to read by herself and I get those books from the previously mentioned lists for her to read to me. After she reads them to me, she will also read them to herself later before we turn in the books.

  8. Since your daughter will be in K, I would only do formal Phonics/Reading, Math, and Handwriting with her. I asked my parents (teachers with combined 60+ years of experience) when I started homeschooling my oldest what they would do in a perfect educational world with kids in Kindergarten. Without hesitation they said, "Teach them to read, teach them basic math, and start handwriting the second semester." I followed their advice and it couldn't have been wiser!!

     

     

     

    totally :iagree:! History & Science are just fun extras at our house that we do when interest peaks and/or there is time (not much of that these days!) :)

  9. Math is a hard subject to advise on w/o knowing your kids so good luck w/that one! If you KNOW your dd is a mathy and would be bored w/a lot of repetition, from what I've heard, Singapore is good. If repetition is key for your avg math student, give Saxon a go (knowing it takes A LOT of time and one-on-one work)...good luck :)

     

    For reading, I 100% recommend Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading!!! I use the book, magnets (for the beginning), bob books (after the 1st 30 or so lessons), and a magna-doodle (others use white boards). The magna-doodle (or white board) is b/c the book is really busy and the lettering may be challenging to your K'er (not big enough). In fact, my K'er is on lesson 90 or so and she is just starting to read the stories out of the book (rather than me writing them down for her).

     

    Writing - HWT: I found the teacher's manual to be helpful so I use that, the chalkboard, the workbook, and the curves & lines (I made them out of cardboard - there is a template in the teacher's manual).

     

    History: I did geography last year w/my K'er & pre-K'er (look up the scope & sequence from K12 K History, get a globe & map, use your library & the internet & have fun!!!). This year, I am reading CHOW (Children's History of the World) w/o doing activities (we are going to do SOTW w/activities, etc. next year since mine are young).

     

    Science: Kid-led. The goal was to do Mudpies to Magnets but it never happened. So, we did whatever was around us - a month of butterflies, flowers, farm animals, leaves, and birds - took pics, read TONS of library books, colored diagrams, printed out the pics, and made books...lots of fun!

     

    hth! ;)

  10. is she saying 'a-t' and just can't blend it? I just would then say "a-t...at!" and have her repeat. dd1 just needed me to model how to blend first...dd2 got it by herself...she may not be ready or she may just need a little help at first - doesn't hurt to try :)

  11. I certainly don't wish it was dementia but then again, if there was a reason, it *may* be easier to swallow...He is a control freak - plain & simple. Even though he has never made a lot of $$ (my mom is the one who rakes it all in), he throws around their $$ in order to control us.

     

    When I was 18 (I think), he said he would pay me $10,000 if I would elope - so he wouldn't have to pay for a wedding. A few years later, he upped it to $20,000. I wish I could have taken him up on his offer but my mom wouldn't let me - she wanted a wedding. :glare:

     

    They offered to finance our house (essentially be our bank - we pay them back, w/interest & escrow) when we got married but when they found out we were pg, they took back their offer. I can't remember what they did when they found out about #s 2 & 3 but I know they did something - they always do... We have been so much on our own, they have less leverage than before but when they found out about our newest baby, they didn't invite us up to the lake house this summer but once (we used to be invited once or twice a month).

     

    I care but I don't care...the one thing I HATE are the comments around & to my kids. He even said one time, "three's a crowd" to my ds - he was only 1 so he didn't understand but it made me (and still does) SOOO MAD!!!

  12. What if one daughter had two kids and the other had six. Do I really have to give each equal value gifts? My natural inclination would be to give equally to the two families or maybe slightly more to the larger. QUOTE]

    You don't have to give any gift at all. Last I checked, gift giving was voluntary.;) But think about it from the child's POV. I'm worth less because my parents happen to have more children, and my cousins are worth more because their parents have fewer.

     

    yeah, I'm not a very big present or holiday fan so I certainly do not expect a certain #/amount of presents or want them but even if I did, :iagree: with Lawana

  13. I'm so sorry that your dad is like that to you.

    My grandmother didn't want my mom to have us. She tried her best to get my mom to abort each one of us (3 of us kids altogether), and when that didn't work, she tried to get us adopted out. I don't get it. My mom and dad were married, in their twenties, it's not like they were having kids out of wedlock or financially irresponsible and things. She said that the more grandkids she had, the more Christmas presents she would have to buy...

     

    yeah, my parents want to help pay for their grandkids' education and by having more, I am making it harder on them. I said we appreciate all the $$ you have put toward their education but please do not feel obligated to continue to contribute to the 529 (btw, my mom still works and makes over a million a year so it's not like they're strapped for cash) -

  14. Just curious as to how others have decided how many children to have -

     

    How did you decide when to stop, when to keep going, or was the decision simply out of your control, etc.?

     

    we don't have a # in mind - really. MANY in our church have 4 so we feel like we almost *can't* have 4 :) however, this last pregnancy was by far my most difficult and I wonder if it will only get worse or if it was just this pregnancy (here's to hopin'). I can't imagine more than 10 but I am such a people pleaser and the only thing that makes me want to limit the # is the comments of my father - why do I care so much? :glare:

  15. When I saw the title of your post, I was thinking, "Heck, that has to be one of the fun things about getting old--saying whatever you want." :001_smile: But what your dad is doing isn't being tactless. It's very hurtful and mean-spirited. What do you mean he doesn't approve of any of your dc? Did he expect you to never have children? I'd probably avoid him as much as possible if it were me.

     

    Well, dd1 was a honeymoon baby, which they thought was CRAZY and said I should be done (I was 23). dd2 was 16 mo later and again, we're crazy, etc., etc. They get angrier with each one and my dad says it's b/c of finances that we shouldn't have anymore (even though we are not in debt). We have separated ourselves from them more and more as the years have gone by and so they get even more angry b/c there is less leverage :\ anywho...

     

    they think everyone should have 1 or 2(maybe) and they should be spaced 3-5 years apart - anything else is ridiculous...

  16. Anyone have a relative or neighbor (close) that makes comments frequently that just make your jaw drop?!?!?

     

    My dad has made 3 since I got pg this last time that would be good sitcom material but people find it hard to believe me when I tell them (b/c of how outrageous they are). Here they are:

     

    When I was going through morning sickness, he did not want me coming over to their house b/c I was "throwing it [the pregnancy] in his face" when I got green...(he has not approved of ANY of our kids and has tried to 'punish' us in any way possible).

     

    I was nursing my newest (2 weeks old today!) last week and my dad offered to pay if my dh wanted a vasectomy and would throw in an extra $5,000 if we did it NOW!

     

    My dh is doing P90X (I am so proud of him) and I was just making casual conversation w/my dad about how well he is doing and my dad says (in front of my oldest), "Well, he better do something or you are going to be a widow before you know it". Really??? Really??? Argh!

     

    This is a vent thread - there was no point, just wanted to :001_huh: with others' sympathy? :)

  17. We hardly ever get comments. Like Paula, due to medical issues during pregancy James is my one and only. If people do say anything, I always say something to the effect that "Yep, he is my miracle child " rather than get into the whole story of why I could only have one. That usually shuts them up and besides it isn't their business anyway. You truly know if they aren't listening when they say 'that's nice' and move on. It seems to be one of those programmed questions like the socialization question. An issue that's not really an issue. KWIM.

     

    I always go straight into defense-mode when getting to know a new friend if said friend has an only b/c I always hear comments about how many, how young, how close ours are. I never thought that parents of onlies would hear comments as well until I met a friend in a similar situation to yours - it really opened my eyes!

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