Or her grandchildren could write her a note, if they know how the mail works. :001_rolleyes: Really though, why is the "new" way of communicating somehow better than the "old" way? Why would things skew in the direction of the grandchildren's preferred method, rather than the grandmother's preferred way? I get it -- she has nostalgia for the way things used to be, little handwritten notes from the grandkids, and all that. But still, how hard is it to write a note or send a card to your grandmother? Take ten minutes once a month and make it happen! I don't blame her for missing what she once had and would still prefer. I do think her complaints (to anyone other than her grandchildren) are pointless, though.

When I have noticed this in my older relatives, it's usually because they are simply too tired to keep learning new stuff, more new stuff, and yet more new stuff. Like with my parents, they seem to have reached a point where they had updated "enough," and were ready to simplify life, in order to be able to handle it. The same could be said for my aunt and uncle, who "got rid of the internet," because they didn't understand it, didn't want to pay for it, and didn't want to run the risks associated with it. From their perspective, it's not worth it to them. They are perfectly able to live their lives without it, and they say they feel safer and more confident sticking with what they know -- television and a land-line phone. I've also seen this generation (80+) change stay-over vacations into day trips -- no more sleeping in strange beds, LOL. But I think a lot of this has to do with being able to manage the changes that have come with being in their 80s, and they all do remarkable well with their independence and enjoying life. So it's not really a matter of being completely closed off to things, but rather a matter of wanting to maintain that independence and making sure that they don't get too far out on a limb. I think this is actually wisdom, so long as it's not done with a spirit of closing off completely to life and relationships, if that makes sense. The only other case I've seen, in someone much younger, was a person who was never really very sociable, who decided to move out to the woods and leave people behind. That lasted about five years before they were super lonely and isolated. They have since made the choice to sell that house and move closer to their adult children, out of the woods. We'll see how that turns out, in the long run. But, knowing the entire situation, I think there were good reasons why they wanted some time away in the woods. At first, I did think -- window seat, stack of books, pot of tea? How long will that satisfy you, even if you're a total introvert? They actually lasted longer out there than I think I could have done, yet the time still came when it was best to move on from the isolation, towards family and community. So maybe a person has to come to these realizations on his or her own?

:iagree: Here's what I would do: (1) Line up Math as soon as possible, and work through that consistently (2) Establish daily & weekly routines for November & December (e.g., Daily = math, reading, instrument, chores, laundry, meals, exercise, hygiene, hobbies, pets, etc.; Weekly = grocery shopping, errands, library, park, church, etc.) (3) Work together to set up your new home, become familiar with your new community & church, prepare for the holidays, etc. (4) Plan & prep for the rest of the school year (January through May/June)

In that situation, yes, I would homeschool, but then, we have always homeschooled. Parents with children in our local middle school say the bullying is very, very bad. When we first started homeschooling, my goal was to get all three girls up through 3rd grade. When we moved here, that goal changed to "through middle school." Then we heard that the high school has a horrendous drug and alcohol problem... sigh. I feel sorry for the kids stuck in those situations, honestly. With my girls, hopefully we'll be able to homeschool through high school, and like you said, just avoid all that social drama. So, yes, I would homeschool her. But you have to ask yourself if that is what YOU want to do. It's work, and no mistake. We have to be honest with ourselves about our own commitment to the task at hand, our willingness to do the hard work of homeschooling. When my girls were little, homeschooling them was actually easier than doing the school routine would have been, but that has now shifted. Homeschooling them now is much more work, in a certain sense, than putting them in school would be. But with homeschooling, we have autonomy and freedom that we would never have if we were tied down to a school system. At this point, it would be incredibly tough for us to give up that autonomy, however much work there is to homeschooling. You get used to being your own boss, KWIM? As for getting "out there" every day, as some have suggested you do, my question to that is "Why?" I don't think there's a problem with being a home-body, really. Every family can find their own balance of at-home work and outside activities to create a whole, rich life for each member. We are definitely not out the door each day, and we like it that way. The girls have some high-quality activities outside the home, but they also have personal hobbies and interests right here, where they live. I think that sometimes there is a misconception that every interesting thing you could pursue has to happen outside the home, in a classroom, or in a group setting. But home can be a rich and interesting place in which to learn and grow. Fill your home life with good things -- music, books, crafts, pets, hobbies, games, recreation, family traditions, healthy meals, chores, rest, and so on -- and there will be plenty to fill up your lives for a long time. :) HTH.

I agree, these dresses are "too short." They seem to me to be more of a cover-up for a swim suit, rather than a dress, but even then they're kind of on the short side. IMO, it's more than how short they are -- they are too skimpy all the way around. HTH.

Three students here -- 7th, 5th, and 5th. We did Latin for several years, but made the decision this year to drop it and focus our language studies on French. It took a full schedule in everything else for me to realize that not doing Latin was a viable option for us. We may come back to it at some point, but even if we never do, our time in the language was well-spent. HTH.

:iagree:

English Reading The Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading (worked for all three kids) Memoria Press Story Time Treasures and More Story Time Treasures (all three kids in 1st grade, LOVED IT; but it has changed a bit since we did it; we didn't care for their other literature guides, though) Spelling & Vocabulary All About Spelling (Levels 1 through 3 or 4, then it was time to switch to something more independent) Phonetic Zoo (Levels A [4th grade], B [5th grade], C [6th grade]) Advanced Spelling & Vocabulary (7th grade, only three sections) Wordly Wise Vocabulary (we did Book 1 when the girls were little and just LOVED it; we never did Book 2, but have done Books 3, 4, 5, 6, and now 7). Grammar First Language Lessons (we lasted about halfway through Level 4, then it was time to switch to something more student-directed) CLE Language Arts (grammar & spelling sections only, not penmanship or composition; 400s through 600s, then we're done) Composition Writing with Ease (Levels 1 through 3; we stretched these out over 1st through 4th grades, because we added in other writing assignments; we never did any of Level 4, though I have it in a box!) Writing with Skill (Levels 1 & 2; part of WWS 1 for 5th, finish WWS 1 for 6th; part of WWS 2 for 7th, and so on) Math Horizons Math (from Kindergarten through part of 3rd Grade, then it started to drive us crazy; we switched to...) CLE Math (from 300s through 700s or 800s [not sure], and are happy with it so far) French Ecoutez, Parlez! (Books 1 through 4, first all of them only orally, then again with all the workbooks)Bible & Christian Discipleship Egermeier's Story Bible (we read this over and over, it was a hit) Family Bible Reading Hymns & Worship songs What the Bible Is All About for Kids (all three girls read through this over two years) David C. Cook Journey through the Bible (same as above, read over two years) Adventuring through the Bible (the plan is for the girls to read this book over 2-3 years) Junior Bible Quiz (we did this [non-competing] for a few years in place of a "catechism") CLE Bible (400s [Life of Jesus] and 500s [Old Testament: Creation to Moses]; I'm not sure what we'll do next year) History Story of the World (all of them) Mystery of History (so far, Volumes 1 & 2) Miscellaneous This is not a program, per se, but we have stuck with reading aloud over the years, with all the children. We have also added hundreds of well-organized books to our home library, and I think this has had more impact than any program. For Science, I have not found anything that I like consistently enough to have used it for years and year. This is my most stressful subject to teach, I think, for two reasons -- (1) I'm weak in it, and (2) it's more "hands-on" than some other things I'm weak in, so it requires more in the moment explanations and interpretations. Not my strong suit, so I'm always looking for hand-holding in Science. Haven't really found it yet, unfortunately!

:lurk5:

We have always homeschooled. We'll be starting 7th (oldest) and 5th (twins) in a week or two. When the girls were little (Pre-K through about 2nd grade), homeschooling was basically a parental decision, with very little input from the children. I did ask them what they "liked" about homeschooling, but that was about it. Generally, the things they liked had more to do with my mothering and their being at home than with academics. Around 3rd grade, I would occasionally ask my oldest daughter, "Do you like being homeschooled? Do you want to continue, or do you want to attend school? Do you ever wonder what it's like? Do you have advice for me?" I genuinely wanted to know if she had questions, was curious about school life, felt like she was missing out, had something to say to her mother/teacher, or whatever. She always wanted firmly to continue homeschooling, as have my younger two children as they passed through 3rd and 4th grades. At around 5th grade, I have included the girls in the planning more -- asking questions; getting feedback; brainstorming our schedule, routines, and structures; asking them to make a list of things they'd like to learn and do; discussing methodology and approaches to learning; and so on. I think the more invested they are in their own education and lifestyle, the better things proceed during the year. I can come back and say, "You wanted this, and you wanted it this way, so now it's time to own it." ;) Even with this current level of student input, I anticipate having to give "The Speech" at least two or three times this year. LOL. :toetap05: Yeah. As for high school, I have mixed feelings on that, honestly. On the one hand, I think most parents still have the greater wisdom, as well as a responsibility to protect and lead/advise/give guidance. On the other hand, we need to place some decisions into our child's hands. It's her life, not "mine," and she needs to be free® to live it. So I don't know how much the choice will be "ours" or "hers" when that time comes. At present, they all want to homeschool through high school, so we'll see. HTH.

My husband's work colleague posted an adorable video of his teenage daughter smashing her old clock with a sledge hammer, as she received a new clock for her birthday. There was no explanation with the video, so we were just wondering -- Is this a Swedish tradition, or possibly a family tradition? He is an engineer with the company. Maybe that has something to do with it? My husband is going to ask him later today, but I'm curious now! :) The sledge hammer is bigger than she is! ;)

Not what you asked about, but last year, for 4th & 6th, we used the following: Spelling -- Phonetic Zoo, Levels A & C (but I'm not sure the girls really "got much" out of this, so I have mixed feelings about recommending it; and it's not exactly inexpensive, either). Grammar (with some Spelling) -- CLE LA, half of 500 (for 4th) and half of 600 (for 6th), grammar only (but there is also spelling in here, and the girls did do it; this, I think, was a good thing; I like the word lists) Vocabulary -- Wordly Wise, Book 4 (for 4th) & Book 6 (for 6th); this can be completely very independently and was definitely worth doing; easy to implement! Vocabulary (Roots) -- English from the Roots Up, Volume 1 (cards only); we studied and tested out on a set of cards about once per month HTH.

Yes, that is what it felt like to me on Sunday! The bass was SUPER loud, just very much vibrating throughout the building, even out to the lobby. There is a large chalkboard on the wall outside the sanctuary, and the entire board was shaking with the bass beat. I couldn't even sit outside in the heat, because the music was being blasted through loud speakers to the patio area. Sound waves everywhere! So I escaped to my van, which I parked at the farthest end of the parking lot. But I can't really do that every week, can I? Ear plugs have not seemed to help the past few Sundays. I do always carry them in my purse, and usually put at least one in my left ear (more sensitive). But the past few Sundays, the "ill" feeling has been more about the assault by sound wave than the actual volume itself, if that makes sense. Do you mind if I ask, How were you finally diagnosed with SVT? Feel free to PM me with that, if you like. Thanks!

No evening service. No Wednesday night service. Wednesday nights = groups for kids + adult discussion groups.

Hi, Rose. No, but I think it could be Supraventricular Tachycardia (SVT). I tried to link it, but I can't get the links to work. SVT is an irregular and/or rapid heartbeat that is not triggered by exercise, high fever, or stress (or related to an underlying heart condition, from what I have read). Years ago, I had a friend who had panic attacks, so I am familiar with what those look like. Plus, she described to me how they feel. I don't think that what I experienced on Sunday was a panic attack. I think it was directly related to the vibrations/sound waves affecting my heart's electrical signals, the signals that control the heart rate.

In a way, I agree, Winterbaby, but there really is nothing else up here. Nothing. Really and truly, of all the options, this is the only one there is, and that is why it's so upsetting that it has changed to this extent. The only other thing we can think of is to simply stay at home, but how is that going to work for our (homeschooled) children? Even if we go and I sit in the parking lot, that is a sacrifice I am willing to make for their sake. I realize this is less than ideal, but there are some things in life we don't control, and the way churches are is one of them. It's a corporate entity, you know, like this group blob that has nothing to do with what I think or what people actually need spiritually or... I don't even know how to explain it. It's just that, this week, for the first time in my life (50 years now), I suddenly understood what Jesus meant when he said, "Blessed (fortunate, lucky, wealthy) are the poor (beggars) in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven." We always say things like, "We're so blessed," in the context of what we have, never what we are lacking. But Jesus said that we are blessed in our abject spiritual poverty, in our lack of options spiritually. I honestly never grasped this prior to this past Sunday. At that point, I realized that there really is no option for me, except to beg, to be a beggar -- that what we need is truly not available to us. Poverty is not setting aside our options to "play" at being poor. No, poverty is not having a workable option at all. It is non-voluntary constraint. And that is where I am now. Up against it. I'm not sure how to move forward even one step further from here.

Morning Routine (approx. 7:30 to 9:30 am) Breakfast & Pet Care Meal Prep (lunch & supper set up) Kitchen Clean Up Chores & Bedrooms Drink Water School Work (approx. 9:30 to 11:00 am) Finishing up Science (group; we always save a little Science for the summer, we like to do this.) Finishing up Composition (6th grader, just a little left) Typing practice Music practice (piano, other instrument, or choir) Spelling (a few more steps to go) As the school work wraps up, this is morphing into free time (no TV, don't even ask) ALSO, if the weather is lovely in the morning, they go outside! That little bit of school work that we still have to do can wait until the afternoon... or tomorrow... or a rainy, sticky day. It's cooler in the morning, and there's less chance of a thunderstorm. Household Projects (M/W/F) or Summer Crafts (T/Th) (11:00 am to 1:00 pm) Organizing, sorting, cleaning (Fridays), clothing, closets, etc. Summer crafts (we sort of have a list of things that we'd like to get to) This is actually more flexible in real life than it looks here. ;) They also might be off "doing their thing," while I'm on my own "doing my thing." Right now, I'm scratching my sewing itch. Lunch & Clean Up (1:00 to 2:00 pm) Afternoon Activity (2:00 to 5:00 pm) Swim (backyard pool) or Exercise (treadmill, play room, backyard, park) Library or Field Trip (W) Homeschool Creek Day (F) Evening Routine (5:00 to 8:00 pm) Clean Up (yard, suits, unpack the van, etc.) Showers & Free Time/TV Supper & Clean Up Pets & General Pick Up More free time, if responsibilities are done Bedtime (we have to be careful in the summer time, because bedtime is always sliding to later and later times, but our kids really do need their regular bedtime, or they start to fade) Weekends are a bit different, with Saturdays devoted to either yardwork, errands, or a fun family outing. Sundays are for church, rest, and a Family Movie Night. HTH.

This should go on the Chat Board, but I avoid the Chat Board, so here goes.... We have been attending Church X for the past three years. The girls are happy there, and for them, it's going well enough. My husband and I are just sort of "there" for the sake of being somewhere. In our area, there really is no other viable option, so there we are. For the past three or four Sundays, the music, if you can call it that, has become louder and louder, to the point of really being unbearable. Even at a lower volume, it wouldn't be my preferred style, but that is not my concern at this point. The problem I'm having is in how this volume, and the accompanying vibrations, seem to be affecting my heartbeat. Two Sundays ago, when the music was super-loud, I had to leave the sanctuary and sit out in the lobby. My heart was racing, I felt dizzy and nauseous, and really just could not go back into the sanctuary until the music was over. This past Sunday, my husband was traveling out-of-state for work, so I was there on my own with the three girls. They went to class, and I intended to go into the main sanctuary. However, the music was so incredibly loud, I never made it into the sanctuary. Instead, I sat out in the lobby, where the walls were vibrating and buzzing. It was awful, in and of itself, but then my heart started racing. I honestly thought I was having a heart attack, my heart was beating so fast. My body was completely still, yet my heart was beating as though I had been running at full speed. I had to get out of the building entirely, so I went out to my van and just sat there. My heart slowed down, and I spent the time reading the Bible and wondering what I'll do from now on every Sunday. Obviously, I can't be a part of the "worship service," since I can't physically tolerate it. If you were in this situation, what would you do? Would you just handle it, or would you say something to someone? If so, what would you say? It's kind of a large congregation, and I'm sure the senior pastor doesn't even know my first name, let alone who I am as a person. What would you do?

I have three girls, and your son is in between their ages. They all carry around stuffed animals -- not all day, of course, but from time to time. For example, the other day they were watching "Lady & the Tramp" -- out came all the dogs, LOL. When they watch "Felicity" (or any other horse movie), out come the horses. For "Voyage of the Dawn Treader," it's the mice (because they are related to Reepicheep, and they like to see their famous actor cousin). There is NO possibility of a family movie night without numerous "friends," blankets, fuzzy slippers, soft PJs, etc., etc., etc. My husband just rolls his eyes. :rolleyes: Academically, your son seems on-track to me, maybe even somewhat advanced? I'm not seeing a problem area, unless it's composition? You didn't list that separately, but that could be because MP requires plenty of writing, so you perhaps haven't been doing a separate composition component. But from what you listed, there don't seem to be any areas in which he is "behind" where he should be. We just wrapped up 6th with my oldest, and 4th with my twins. Oldest is definitely ready for 7th grade in September, but she's got a February birthday. Twins are January b-days, and I do think that half-year makes a difference. So, while my girl turned 12 in early February, your son turns 12 at the end of August -- seven months! -- and, IMO, that seven months is a big deal for a kid. Honestly, I'm not sure what I'd do in your shoes. What stood out to me in your post is that he doesn't care. If I had a kid who wasn't wrapped up in being a particular number, and it didn't really matter for some outside-of-school reason (church, sports, etc.), then I'd make him a 6th grader, just to buy him time. FWIW, my oldest is a skimmer. Well, more correctly, she is a FAST reader, but I think there is a tendency to be a skimmer, also. What I'm doing for next year will be to require more written output for her Literature for assigned independent reading, as well as more one-on-one discussion. Yes, this will be time-consuming. :001_rolleyes: But what else would I do with my time? :D How to assess maturity.... that is a great question for those of us with kids this age. I'm thinking, for my own girls, it's things like: Does she hold herself together when a task or situation is frustrating (can't get the cap off the jam), embarrassing (came in at the wrong place during choir practice), annoying (sibling is humming while she's trying to read), somewhat scary (centipede in the garage), or slightly uncomfortable (shot at the doctor)? [Answer: Sometimes yes, sometimes no.] Does she remember to take care of her responsibilities -- her chores, pets, personal care, bedroom & belongings, meal jobs, and school work -- without constant reminders and supervision? [Answer: I see steady progress here.] Does she demonstrate empathy with others? I actually see empathy as a true sign of maturity, more than many other things (like being tech-savvy or having adultified attitudes). Does she seem to be growing increasingly confident in her abilities, rather than less secure? Does she volunteer to do more? Does she approach new experiences as adventures, or does she dread them? Is she curious? We often think of curiosity as a trait of childhood, but truly mature people are always curious about at least a few things. Is her curiosity scattered or deepening? Is she able to focus on learning the tedious parts of something (e.g., music theory or scales, in order to play the piano better), or does she lose interest when there is some "heavy lifting?" Does she realize that not everyone sees the world the same way? That there are differing points of view? That there are "rules of civility" for living together, in spite of these differences? Does she understand the basics of how people ought to go about resolving conflicts in reasonable ways? Your son sounds like a wonderful young man. It doesn't really matter what "grade" you assign him! :D HTH.

I agree with all of Carol's post, but especially the advice to get well before tackling this question in great depth. Especially when I'm hypothyroid, making decisions is so impossible, it's hard to describe. No amount of willpower will get me "there," but if I wait until I emerge, then that always turns out to be the right thing to have done. If the question about buying books can wait until you feel better, I would encourage you to let it wait. Hugs! :grouphug:

When my nephews were young, they would put in an 8 hour day for school, by the time they took the bus there and back. On top of that, there was homework, beginning in Kindergarten. So basically, a 40+ hour work week for a five year old child. Talk about inefficient! We used to say, "How can they have homework when they've been there all day? What did they DO all day at school?" The boys needed time to play, but it was hard to come by. As a solution to this, we decided to homeschool our girls. We have, thankfully, the autonomy that comes with homeschooling. We have that lovely red pen, so we can cross out the busywork! Beyond that, we have a protective parental sensibility, so we can say, "That's enough for today, now go play." I think the key is to be tuned in to the child -- when has she maxed out and stopped learning? Just going through the motions of checking off "school work" gets you nowhere in that case. It's better to stop sooner, pack it up, and move onto the rest of life. Honestly, it's better to make a pot of soup together. My 80/20 principle has been learning to say, "That's enough for today." Near the end of a school year, I apply the same concept to the entirety of the year's work -- "We've done enough here (slash, slash), enough here (check, check), but we'll focus on this and this. That will wrap it up." A teacher ought to know what constitutes "enough," and possess the autonomy to free students from busywork or pure grind when that point has been reached. HTH.

With my girls, it's Scotch tape, LOL. They've only started to realize some of the uses of Duck tape. I'm purposefully keeping them in the dark. ;) It's good to know we're not the only people out there plowing through tape. ;)

Thanks for the suggestions and feedback. It is truly helpful in framing an approach to "requirements" for my 12 year old. Thanks!

Thanks for this, Farrar. I've thought about this over the years. My daughter and I have even discussed it, how when I was growing up, the focus of "gym" class was sports, sports, and more sports. Now... there's nothing exactly wrong with sports, but... ... I don't know. What was it about standing in a hot field, sweating, glasses sliding down my nose, swatting gnats, wearing a too small baseball glove, waiting for someone to finally hit a softball to right field? What could it have been about that lovely physical activity that might have turned me off to it? Hmm... Or maybe it was the hemp rope climbing? "Get up, _________!" (insert last name here). What could it have been about the gym teacher calling us, boys and girls alike, by our last names only, shouting at us to haul ourselves ever higher up the lovely hemp rope, wearing white shorts, a maxipad (remember how thick they were?), with a period, at age twelve, in a co-ed gym class? What could it have been about that physical activity that might have turned me off to it? But I really think it was the lay-ups. You know, those basketball shots in which your knee goes up (like so), while your other leg goes up (like so), and your hands do this (like so) -- it's easy! Except, I could never do a lay-up, so of course, my grade -- perfect attendance, participation, everything else in place, notwithstanding -- went from an A to a B. Because of that one lay-up. After years of this, of exercise being tied to group games and sports, of sitting or standing around waiting for a turn to do something, of learning how to do things that as a young adult I wouldn't have the means (or the group) to do, is it surprising that I have no interest in sports? And what was the point of "gym class?" I never could figure that one out. As an adult, though, there have been better, more suitable options. Adulthood gave me time and permission to find out what works for me. For one thing, I realized that I don't like exercising with other people. So I don't do it! :) Some people might like that, but for me, the appeal is being alone. This gives me time to sort my head out. There is a lot up in there, and it needs organizing. My daily morning time on the treadmill may seem boring, but it is valuable time alone for me. Another activity I enjoy is hiking in the woods with my girls. That is, of course, a bit more social. Very pleasant. Also, yard work and swimming are favorite things to do, with or without other people involved. I think my daughter is somewhat wired like I am (and was). I'd like the next several years to be a time of discovery, where she realizes what makes her tick, including physically. She is very much up in her head. She needs a consistent requirement to come down out of her head and be aware of her body, even if that means getting on a treadmill daily (and probably going back up into her head!). I get it. She will be walking along for 30 minutes, but thinking of her next craft project, LOL.

This is what I do, too. If I wait until later, it doesn't always get done (plus, it hangs over my head all day). So I've learned to get up and get-it-done before coffee or breakfast. Thirty minutes, done. I set the coffee machine to start grinding and brewing seven minutes before I'll be done on the treadmill, so it's just finishing up when I come into the house. Believe me, that coffee waiting for me is motivating! This is really what we need to do -- renovate the garage. It's a nice enough space, plenty of room, if we were to put all that junk up on shelving, and maybe put on a fresh coat of pretty paint. Maybe this summer? Hopefully, we will finally get to it, even if we only spruce it up to Phase 1. ;) The girls are old enough to help now, so.... Yes, we need to get regular, daily exercise in place before all three girls are hormonal (while I'm going through menopause, LOL!). :svengo: Thanks, everyone, for the tips. Did any of you have your child actually log their active hours?