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Showing content with the highest reputation since 05/06/2021 in Posts

  1. I got offered a job at a social service agency providing services for families of children with behavioral, mental, emotional and development disabilities. Other than salary and the travel, I’d love the job. I can take the pay cut sort of and accepted it. But then I get this email from HR stating that they need the following: Schedule Pre Employment/Post Offer Physical Exam This physical exam is a “work physical”. The provider will be provided the job description of the position that you have been offered. It will include vital signs, vision screening, urine drug scree
    92 points
  2. Eta she came home yesterday. Quite nervous but already settling in. She and Auntie Blondie are happily ignoring each other. It turns out that she was a Romanian street dog rescued to Scotland but moved on due to issues with small children. We hope she can be happy with us. ............. We have our virtual home check for her tomorrow, then we should be cleared to meet her. Fingers crossed that she and our existing dog Blondie get on. What do you think, labrador/corgi? She's five years old and a bit nervous, but we are used to working with that.
    65 points
  3. This is very very good. Here is Rachael's post as copied from her FB page. For those that don't know her, she was a key witness and the start of the case against Larry Nassau. ******************* I don’t even know where to begin with what we need to learn from this situation with Josh Duggar. If you haven’t paid attention to updates, you should, because it is a glaring example of the problems we have in our legal system, and especially in conservative Christian culture. The images and videos Josh downloaded for his own sexual pleasure were of toddlers and babies being sexuall
    49 points
  4. Glancing back over this thread, it’s kind of sad that we (myself included!) are attacking each other over word definitions instead of focusing on Josh Duggar, whom I think we all agree is an evil pervert. (But if anyone doesn’t agree that Josh Duggar is an evil pervert, all bets are off.) Can we all at least agree that Josh Duggar is creepy? And evil? And a pervert? And that he should be in prison for many, many years? I’m really hoping we can agree on that.
    38 points
  5. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-56858863 Three German gymnasts competed in leotards with full length legs because they are annoyed by the issues that come with the regular leotards. Shorts are banned, and this is apparently the first time women have worn full coverage leotards for non-religious reasons. Over on ChalkBucket there was a lot of discussion about this article. While nobody thinks more modest leotards will stop actual predators, several people think that allowing gymnasts to have more boundaries and say in they are forced to compete in is a good idea. It was al
    34 points
  6. I'm astounded that the word "creepy" is getting so much attention. It never struck me as a particularly formal word. If that makes senses? It's almost slang, which I don't think we expect to have very specific, nuanced meanings. It's like arguing over the specific standards that must be met before using the word crap. Can it only mean literal crap? Or is it okay that it's a metaphoric crap? Does it have to meet some standard of crappiness before it should be used?
    34 points
  7. Exactly. And I think some of us filtered reality through our own lens. I never watched the Duggars much but I was willing to believe there were a well meaning family, if a bit over the top. I saw the Pearls No Greater Joyvideos - where he’s rather jovial and assumed he didn’t mean much literally - my dad is like that - address the heart, work together, and discipline is more theoretical than IRL. i figures most folks who had a bunch of kids and chose to spend nearly 24/7 with them actually really liked and enjoyed them. So many of us who identify as large family and conserv
    32 points
  8. The behavior was juvenile. The man is a creep. Creeps use juvenile sexual behavior in public because it has plausible deniability of being “not creepy” but it erodes boundaries and torments the target because if she objects then she’s overreacting and can’t take a joke. He’s getting his kick not by the friction of rubbing his private parts on someone but by exerting power to embarrass his targets (his wife and his daughter) in a sexually charged way.
    30 points
  9. Since the western culture is saturated in materialism, the health and wealth gospel is a very attractive lie to professing Christians who don't want to choose between God and mammon and be humble, living sacrifices. This manifests itself in wanting political power to push policies that a person perceives as maintaining or gaining wealth and legislating their versions of morality to earn favor in the form of wealth for the nation from God. People prone to traditionalism (loving tradition for its own sake and categorically disliking change regardless of each tradition and change's pros and co
    26 points
  10. Welcome to this homeschool forum, brand new member. You will find many of your questions discussed in great detail in the long general coronavirus and vaccine threads. I will give your post the benefit of the doubt and assume you don't intend to pot stir and these are genuine questions. Super briefly: vaccine is effective but not perfect, hence still caution. The pandemic hit a year before an election in the US and has affected the entire world; why would it have anything to do with the election? Science works by investigating data, drawing conclusions, testing against observations.
    26 points
  11. When you live in the country odd things happen. This year we’ve had a miniature horse, a pigeon, and now a Jersey heifer show up in our yard randomly. No idea where this one came from. Hopefully the owner will see her as he drives by and come to pick her up.
    25 points
  12. It’s amazing to me that they WANT that much control over their kids. It seems like a lot of moving pieces to constantly manipulate. To me, teens and adults are so much more enjoyable than littles because you get to really see and enjoy the uniqueness of the individual. I’m boggled by the attraction of cookie cutter houses, cookie cutter kids, and cookie cutter lives?! Kids who are passionate, engaged, kids who are, “Take a deep breath... Now JUMP!” are the most fun - why suck the beauty of individuality out of them? You know I was really broken over college or no college for our olde
    24 points
  13. Then maybe this is too triggering for you to read. I am sorry if it is, but the discussion is actually quite worthy since these cults still exist and keep promulgating their ideas. As for the Duggars, had JimBob and Michelle not wanted to live a life of scrutiny in the public eye, they should not have sold out their family's privacy to TLC. If the elder Duggar victims had wanted privacy, they could have chosen again not to be on t.v. in the sequel show which came out after the sex abuse was brought to light. They chose to keep airing their private lives for profit. It is worth discussing
    24 points
  14. And some of us have changed since joining the boards. Signed, No longer saying "The Pearls aren't perfect but..." No longer young earth creationist No longer only skirt-wearing, except in the summer (but still don't wear jeans without a long top) 😉 No longer living in the country Still head covering, but for worship service only Still believe my husband is the spiritual head of my household Only ever had one kid 😉 Always was college-educated, MercyA
    24 points
  15. By the way—for all the people who are dealing with some level of retraumatization from this, whether from abuse or growing up/being involved this cult or similar—I see you and your pain is valid.
    24 points
  16. I think you hit on something, but I'm not so sure I would call it the long standing culture, as just a different understanding. One thing in modern conservative stay-at-home daughters movement is the holding up of Proverbs 31, and a complete misrepresentation of it. They want an idea of a woman who will submit, be meek, support her husband at all things...a wife of noble character is worth far above rubies, but that's as far as the reading goes. What is missing is the autonomy and leadership shown in Proverbs 31. The virtuous woman has her own life that supports the family: she is a
    23 points
  17. Hi all - this is ChocolateReign. I think there was an attempt to merge my previous accounts but pretty sure due to an issue on my end it was an epic fail. Before I discuss the Duggars I just want to say I found Jim Bob's behavior creepy and from this position I shan't be moved! On to Josh (soon to be Inmate #546738 or something similar)... I read the arrest warrant and some information a friend picked up on Pacer. I had a few questions about why there was such a gap between when the seizure of the electronics occurred and his arrest, but my *guess* is it was due to COVID and
    23 points
  18. As a survivor myself, I sympathize with a view that is critical of porn in general or at least one that is quite aware that porn has many significant issues. I don’t think she is doing anything wrong to see a line between some of the issues with porn and either patriarchy, misogyny and/or rape culture. Porn is designed to keep people watching. Many people who get into it report that after awhile they do find that they want more and more taboo or hard core materials because what they initially enjoyed is no longer arousing to them. Another factor is that in the internet age, it can be
    23 points
  19. The thing that would bother me most is that you said your oldest is afraid of your mom. The fact that this manipulative narcissist has any power over any of your children means that the dysfunction that has plagued you all your life has been allowed to start poisoning the next generation. You all need permission to just tell your mother to f*** off. I hope you can help your oldest to see your mother for what she is and to understand that this person really does not have any power over her other than what she chooses to give. If the kids are getting the message from you, either consciously or u
    23 points
  20. Pfizer FDA approval for 12-15 went through! Great news! https://www.cnbc.com/2021/05/10/pfizer-covid-vaccine-fda-clears-use-in-kids-ages-12-to-15.html eta adding NYT link. This all was JUST released so I’m sure more links will be popping up this evening https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/10/health/pfizer-covid-vaccine-teens.html ETA 2 - Just a quick reminder this isn't the final hurdle but given this went through, I would definitely expect CDC to follow this week. The F.D.A.’s go-ahead is not the final hurdle. An advisory committee of the Centers for Diseas
    22 points
  21. Hopefully last update. She just told us that she will be out by June 15th, and sniffed, “which will make everyone happy.” 🙄
    21 points
  22. This women's leotard stuff is misogynistic crap really. White crotch, low back, inability to wear a bra or whatever makes her comfortable to compete/practice is just misogynistic crap. More of the same old no bodily autonomy for women jive. If boys can wear shorts, girls can wear shorts. The end. Choices are good. Boundaries even better.
    21 points
  23. In my ex husbands case it was a very long time from police raid to arrest. It was because the more they dug, the deeper it got and the more they found and the more they had to investigate and on and on. They also want to make sure it was an air tight case. Mine had files so well hidden they had to detail in court how they could be accessed and what it took to put them there. I never knew any porn was there at all, let alone what was found. Yep, the default is release until trial....sadly. Also, he would likely be served well to take any plea deal offered to him. Mine rejecte
    21 points
  24. The college where I teach announced this morning that we are at 69% faculty and staff and 68% of students who have received at least one shot. Also that the random testing for last week had zero positive results. Our students have worked hard this year because in-person learning is important to them. They’ve maintained a campus bubble with strict COVID protocols. We’ve had isolated cases but no major outbreaks with most classes meeting in person. They’re getting vaccinated because they want life to go back to normal for everyone because it is safe, not to “go back to normal” by st
    20 points
  25. Awww, I'm sorry, math teacher and mommyoffive. Since your mamas won't do it, I would like to wish both of you a Happy Mother's Day!
    20 points
  26. Stepping in just a second, as someone who lived in mainland China for six years. Wet markets are the equivalent of local supermarkets for most city residents in China. Live animals, meat, tofu and veg are all sold in one big space, although in separate areas, and refrigeration is uncommon. What allows the practice to be hygienic - I used to buy food there - is daily shopping, quick turnover and high heat cooking methods. Raw salad meals are not common. So the hygiene is based around the food preparation methods. When you add in exotic animals carrying diseases that can transfer to oth
    20 points
  27. Thanks, Katy! We knew about this study because dh was asked to be a part of it, but I’m sure many people had never heard about it. I should point out that the J&J vaccine was not included in the study, and also that the results aren’t entirely conclusive, as there was a very uneven number of participants in terms of which organ(s) they had received — and which organ it was can make a big difference in how well a vaccine might work. But the main takeaway is that organ transplant recipients can’t just assume that their vaccines are protecting them very well, and they (and their fam
    20 points
  28. Withholding federal aid for college is insane and counterproductive. Seriously.
    19 points
  29. There are consequences to actions, and parents who use and abuse their kids must face this. There is no good reason you should take your mother into your home. It isn't even honoring the position of mother because allowing her to make you miserable, interfere in your relationships with your husband and children, and cause you so much distress is just not good. It has too many lifetime consequences. Such folks need to be taken care of by a staff at a facility. This is the natural outcome of being that kind of person, and takes the teeth out of their ability to continue to really hurt others. S
    19 points
  30. (( hugs )) People kvetch about the "terrible twos," but honestly, parenting late adolescents is a zillion times trickier IMHO. I'd factor a number of variables. Whether kid is closer to 18, vs closer to 13... for both degree-of-concern and also for tactical reasons Whether drug under discussion was closer to pot, vs closer to meth (if pot: whether it's legal vs illegal in your state) How the kid is otherwise faring (holding it together on work and grades and other commitments, interacting meaningfully with friends and family... vs floundering, withdrawa
    19 points
  31. I just don't live in a world where anyone has to split any wood.
    19 points
  32. I agree it is really disturbing and shocking. Possibly the most disturbing thing I've ever experienced in my lifetime. I've read so much about WWII and how the German Christians were suckered into supporting Hitler and wondered how in the world they could be caught up in all that. Wow. And now here we are. I honestly can't quite articulate the root of it, except I think it was decades in the making. Really sweet people I love have been caught up in this. I'd recommend the book The Myth of a Christian Nation by Greg Boyd. He is my pastor and I'm so fortunate to be part of that community
    19 points
  33. I have been, frankly, HORRIFIED at people I knew and loved growing up, for actually, the last 4 years...a whole bunch of Southern Baptist missionaries, and "God-fearing" missionary kids that I knew all my life on the mission field. These are people I looked up to and held up as examples of "godly" men and women, sacrificing and pouring out their lives for black and brown people...and yet they not only overlooked and pooh-poohed Trump's sexual bruh-ha-has, but they worshipped at the feet of the most blatantly racist president we've had in a long time. I have begun to think that what motivate
    19 points
  34. This was a real hit last night. I didn't bake it for as long as specified, because I prefer tofu soft rather than crispy, but the flavours were really good. Oh, I used oregano because I don't keep dried basil: https://www.plantpowercouple.com/recipes/balsamic-tomato-tofu-cutlets/
    19 points
  35. What about “skeevy?” Can we agree that JB is skeevy?
    19 points
  36. Yeah. And in that case, I don't really care if the kid was trying pot one time or using heroin for a year. Taking away access to education just emphasizes that you don't want that person to ever have more options beyond drugs.
    18 points
  37. A Michigan Law Review review of Pride and Prejudice. Relevant to several current threads. Don't skip the footnotes.
    18 points
  38. I do, and I want it to be men's work. (but I'm lazy like that.)
    18 points
  39. I’ve been here since 2009-2010 I believe. The board demographics have shifted, but I think it represents a significant shift in homeschooling demographics.
    18 points
  40. I have posted a few times about how Dh and I don’t really like where we live, but we have moved a few times (and always liked those places) and we want to settle down for our boys. Anyway, back in February (that month you should never make decisions) Dh applied for a promotion in Europe and found out yesterday he got it. We won’t go until the beginning of the 2022-2023 school year. I am super excited for everyone in our family except ds15. He loves baseball and there really isn’t any baseball where we are going. Dh said since he will be 16 when we go, we should let him decide if he w
    18 points
  41. Well, anyone 18 and older, especially if they are no longer living at home, will be forging and managing their own relationship with your mom. That is, if they want one with her. And they might have to learn the same lessons you did, the hard way. It's not like you can forbid them from accepting her invitations. Or you could, but then it would be a boundary crossing by you, right?
    18 points
  42. This is a situation where two things are true at once. Anna is a mother who should protect her kids. Anna is also a young woman, without anything that resembles a complete education, who was born into an abusive cult where she has undoubtedly been abused herself in a myriad of ways. Marriage following the ATI model is inherently abusive- spiritually, mentally, financially and emotionally for sure and quite likely physically and sexually as well. From the outside looking in, it's easy for people who are not in a cult situation or a domestic violence situation to say what Anna and othe
    18 points
  43. Even in a family with good, loving relationships, it may not be possible to care for an elderly person at home. While the elder may prefer not to be in a nursing home, I find it very selfish to make one's adult children promise they would never put the old loved one in a nursing home. Caretaking and nursing is hard work. Emotionally, physically, financially. Sometimes, family members just can't. Even if they love one another. I see my mother caring for my father in their home. I am very concerned about the toll that takes on her. My best friend nursed her husband at home until that just
    17 points
  44. Can we wait until kids can get vaccinated, please?!?! WHY does no one think they matter? Some of them are higher risk as well!
    17 points
  45. Men do have greater upper body strength than women. No need to pretend away actual physical differences. If a task is going to take twice as much effort for me to accomplish as it would for my husband or son to accomplish I'd rather let them do it. I actually like physical work and do plenty of it; I also like being efficient though and me splitting wood is not an efficient use of effort.
    17 points
  46. Language marches on. Awesome no longer means full of awe, cool no longer means slightly warmer than cold, hip isn’t a body part. Creepy means what it means. We all have lexical pet peeves.
    17 points
  47. Um, yes. We all know that. No one is saying he's actually rubbing up against her in an effort to reach sexual climax. People are taking issue with someone pretending to dry hump in public at place, and a venue that caters to families on camera for a media outlet that caters to families. Do you and your spouse mimic any sex acts permitted for married people in public in front of your kids and others? Which ones? Pretending to perform any sexual act at a family friendly venue for a family targeted TV channel is something most people, including people with very liberal attitudes about sex, wo
    17 points
  48. They likely all were. They were followers of the Pearls also. Lest your memory be short, a decade or so ago here on these boards people were supportive of the Pearls and their methods. 2006-2010–I would have said the boards leaned towards the Pearls, Duggars, Vision Forum, Maxwells, and other more extreme evangelical families. The more moderate culture shift over the last decade is what has precipitated the board departures here....some en masse...in protest. 🤦
    16 points
  49. I do hope that people reading this who have not been vaccinated and who have access to vaccines will get off the fence. And that those who currently have no access remain safe and that vaccines reach you very soon. Bill
    16 points
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