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Showing content with the highest reputation on 05/31/2021 in all areas

  1. That's great and all, but he should have promoted the vaccines every. single. day. Not just mentioned it here and there. And not simultaneously showed callous disregard for spreading the virus by having huge rallies where people crammed together unmasked, and constantly made fun of masks... he promoted the vaccines when he thought it would benefit his image, not because he cared about how the vaccines would benefit other people. That's probably too political but I don't care.
    15 points
  2. If you know that it’s a conspiracy theory, then why disseminate it? Why aren’t you dissecting and questioning these conspiracy theories as much as you are questioning vaccines? There should be proof of an actual conspiracy before alleging that one exists. While I have had my own questions about vaccine safety answered satisfactorily enough for me to get vaccinated, I can have respect for someone who wants to wait for more vaccine research. I have ZERO respect for the dissemination of conspiracy theories.
    14 points
  3. I don’t think his parents get a say about when grown adults decide to marry. I think he should calmly tell them that and that their reaction was hurtful. Then go forward as he planned to with respect and forgiveness. Personally I think it’s stupid (bad word choice. Not stupid per se. but foolishly wasteful?) to be engaged more than 2 years tops. (She’s 19 now. 20 with her bachelors. What get married at 21 after graduation and he will be 23/24? That’s not scary young at all to me. Young. But not scary crazy.) Either commit or don’t. But that’s my general view of marriage at any age. I wouldn’t like the debt either. But debts are sadly a part of life for the vast majority of this generation thanks to political decisions they had little say about. Life doesn’t stop for debts or in-laws. If they were my kids, I’d offer to pay for premarital counseling through our diocese. Which would discuss things like how to the young couple needs to discuss how to handle debt and money for me.
    14 points
  4. Yeah. My kids don't understand cities at all. They've never been on a city bus. Never flown in an airplane. Never been to the beach. But... They can milk a cow. Catch a chicken and raise a garden. They know how to avoid ticks and snakes. They know how to cut grass (mercy, they know how to cut grass. We cut acres of it.) They know how to tell if a calf is in distress and assist in a birth if needed. They also know how to tell which cow is in heat and who will calve in the next 3 days. And fencing. Dang. We can all build fences. They can ride lawn mowers and 4 wheelers. And they understand science, can play instruments. My ds will get his black belt in TKD this summer. I really think that the key is how one responds to others. Like a kids who has never had Japanese food can either awkwardly say "No, I don't think I would like that. Sounds gross." or "No, we never ate out much." and kill a conversation. Or they can say "I've never tried it, but I'm willing. Tell me about your favorite Japanese place and what is your favorite dish." We all have things we've never done. The key is to show interest in other people's lives and be excited and act interested in their experiences so they can tell you about their lives. There are so many interesting people and things in this world. When I go to engineering conferences with my dh, I am definitely a fish out of water. But I never feel less than or awkward for it. I stay at home with my kids on the farm. I never finished college. I don't drink or party. I don't care for sports. But people are interested in my life and I'm interested in theirs. No one feels sorry for me because I've never been on a cruise or traveled internationally. I bring other interesting things to the conversation, and I'm not embarrassed about the things I've never experienced.
    14 points
  5. There have even been books written about the crazy things people believe, how it's more common in the U.S., and how it's not really new to have crazy beliefs. Here are just two books I remembered wanting to read. I'm sure there are more. Believing Bullshit: How Not to Get Sucked Into an Intellectual Black Hole Idiot America: How Stupidity Became A Virtue In The Land of The Free
    12 points
  6. After my coin experiment I have figured it all out: The coin shortage last year was because Bill Gates was hoarding all the coins while he inserted transponders into them which now communicate with the microchips from the vaccine.
    12 points
  7. It seems that way cause it is. Either commit to go through everything together or don’t. And they are just talking about what if? Geez. His parents are blowing it in over reaction. 22/24 when she graduates. Possibly 23/25 when they get married sometime soonish after that. So we are talking what they might do 3-4 years from now? The entire world could change by just next year. As a parent I’d just smile and say that sounds lovely and I hope it all works out and tell them I’d like to pay for premarital counseling when they get closer to actually planning things. And then I’d pretty much let it go because I have plenty of more pressing actual happenings to worry about until then. LOL
    11 points
  8. I had to put together an IKEA bed. Congratulate me. that is all.
    10 points
  9. There is certainly vaccine hesitancy in the UK, but it doesn't seem to be as widespread as in the US. The following is the current vaccine situation in Scotland, reflecting strict cohort release (mostly by age but also by health status and employment in health/care). Those aged 30 and over are currently being invited, except in one area that has more cases, where all adults are being invited. The second shot figures reflect the 8-12 week spacing that is being used. ETA: here is the key
    10 points
  10. I think that they can revisit the idea in a couple of years after her being away at college for a few years. Then they will know a) if they are still together and b ) if they are ready to get married. They aren't really ready to be married until they are ready to "leave and cleave". That means being able to talk to relatives and consider their advice but still make their own adult choices for their own adult marriage. They aren't responsible for any one else's reactions to their decisions.
    9 points
  11. My only regret is that the very same politicians who made it possible for the vaccines to be produced so quickly did not follow through to ensure that those vaccines they worked for are not regarded with suspicion or derision by many in the US. The vaccine development for Covid by the US is considered one of the greatest (if not the greatest) scientific achievements of humankind by millions of people - just a FYI that people are able to appreciate the good wherever it may originate from ...
    8 points
  12. So, you say she isn't in pain...but you need to know that dogs don't show pain like people do. They generally won't whine or cry. Instead, they show it by not being able to get up, not being able to crouch to poop, etc. So those things are in themselves indicative of pain, likely in the hips. Also, almost no labradors EVER stop eating. EVER. Dogs in general, but labs in particular. You just can't use that as an indicator in dogs the way you can in cats. I've actually assisted in a euthanasia where the dog passed while eating french fries - they do love their food 🙂 I think, if this was my dog, it would be time. A dog wants to be able to poop, to be able to get up and down without pain. And, the wandering is a sign of dementia. What I would suggest is taking the dog to the vet and saying you think it might be time, explain what you did here. A vet won't put your dog down if it shouldn't be. But if they agree, you know what you need to do. Could you buy more time? Yes..but to what purpose? Dogs don't know time like we do, they don't look forward to grand babies or vacations, you know? They live in the moment, and right now, it sounds like a lot of those moments are hard and painful and confusing. I'm sorry. I really wish I had something more encouraging to say. But I can only offer support and love. I know my dogs would not want me to suffer, so I've vowed not to let them suffer, if I can help it. It isn't a betrayal, it is a final loving action. I'm so sorry. I know this is so hard, and your pup is obviously well loved.
    8 points
  13. I think waiting til graduation is perfectly adequate. Gosh, they'll have been together for years by then -- why NOT get married?! At most, I'd say maybe work a year after the 4-year school to possibly bring down the debt? But to want her to do grad school + a couple of years = ridiculously demanding. (And no longer their place to say. They're both legal adults.)
    8 points
  14. Yes. Sure. I am grateful to EVERYONE who had a part in making this vaccine happen. I don't have to like everything about certain politicians, but I don't care who gets credit for this, just that it happened is enough for me.
    8 points
  15. I love assembling Ikea furniture. The pictures make perfect sense to me and it's a job I can do that STAYS done. I'm that friend that will come assemble your Flukka for you. 😆
    8 points
  16. QFT. In order not to have an even darker view of humankind than I do right now, I have to believe the people spreading conspiracy theories and disinformation, whether it’s about covid, vaccines, stolen elections or anything else, truly do not understand how they are being manipulated by people profiting off them (financially and/or in terms of political power) and truly do not comprehend the profound damage they are doing to our country and its citizens.
    7 points
  17. I have a feeling your daughter may spend a fair amount of time on toxic inlaw support boards in the future. I am saying this based on the fact that they "made" him tell other relatives so that the other relatives can gang up on him,
    7 points
  18. Or maybe Scots care more about each other (they have the NHS after all), aren’t as prone to embrace disinformation and conspiracy theories, and had a better leader when the pandemic started.
    7 points
  19. So his parents aren’t thrilled with the timing of something that’s at least two years in the future? Meh. I think he should have nodded at their concerns and not told your daughter. You should try to forget it and not let it become something that puts a cloud over future interactions with them. You don’t want your future grandchildrens’ birthday parties to bear the tension of marital advice they gave their son before he was engaged.
    7 points
  20. I don't know when they will actually get engaged. My dh and I were engaged for 4 months after dating for 1 year. I think 2 years would be the most I would encourage. She'll be 22 when she graduates. I was 23 when we got married. I wouldn't care if she was 30 when she got married, but 14 years of dating seems extremely excessive 🙂
    7 points
  21. I try to remember that concern often equals love. It doesn't mean a person should take those concerns as fact, but as an expression of love, and know that they are loved - but do what is right for them anyway. It's too soon to start making plans, obviously, but learning how to set mental boundaries with people who love them may be a really good step for now.
    7 points
  22. Just looked at Idiot America and saw it was published in 2009 - imagine an update! I'd also like someone to do an Australian version. We have our own mind-boggling moments of sheer idiocy, too!
    7 points
  23. Learning about all of the profound differences within Christian denominations, primarily from this board, made me more convinced than ever that they can’t all be true, but they can all be false. When I first walked away from the Catholic faith I was raised in, I had doubts for quite awhile. But learning about the vast range of conflicting beliefs among Christians from these boards really helped me to be comfortable with no longer being a practicing Christian or believer. While I do find the type of Christianity described by J-rap intriguing, at this time I don’t feel compelled to pursue it. I guess I’m not a very spiritual person because I’ve never felt any inclination to examine other religions, although I certainly believe they are all just as likely as any Christian denomination to help someone know and grow closer to God (if God exists). Growing up I definitely believed in literal hell and I thought the idea of purgatory made lots of sense. I still can’t wrap my head around the idea of being “saved” and guaranteed a spot in heaven (and hell for those who aren’t “saved”) that I was first exposed to in college and repeatedly thereafter. It’s still as strange and incomprehensible to me now as it was the first time I heard it, despite having many close friends over the years who believe it.
    7 points
  24. Actually, this thread has been really helpful for me in terms of reflecting on why some kids desperately need public school. Because for all the faults of institutional learning, there is an attempt to compensate for basic social and cultural gaps. I taught some kindergartners how to pile up autumn leaves and jump in them the other day 🙂 They started off scared (!) and ended up laughing and having fun. We looked for the different colour leaves, and talked about the colours and seasons. We threw the leaves up in air just for fun, and I showed them how the leaves come off you ( they were scared of getting 'dirty'). These are not particularly deprived kids; they live in high rise, though, and spend a lot of free time at the mall or on an iPad. So yeah, I guess schools have their place.
    7 points
  25. Probably Bill Gates climbed in your window at night and vaccinated him.
    7 points
  26. Plus, when you’ve already spread so many lies and half truths about the virus and regularly undermined public health officials, now everyone is supposed to believe and trust you and them and go get vaccinated? Not to mention the relentless attempts to disparage science and scientists when the facts don’t line up with your opinions. You can’t turn facts on and off to suite your agenda.
    6 points
  27. You forget about considering others who cannot get vaccinated or for whom it’s known that the vaccines have limited efficacy (eg organ transplant recipients). Your reasons are all based on assuming one is only concerned about themselves and their children and not others. Which makes sense given how a significant portion of the US population reacted to the pandemic. But for some of us, concern about ourselves and our children is only one aspect to consider, not the exclusive thing.
    6 points
  28. Thanks. I'm not worried https://www.medpagetoday.com/special-reports/exclusives/91648
    6 points
  29. That’s a huge part of why I’d just say that’s lovely and I hope it all works out and then let it go. There’s a lot of time and distance between now and then for their entire lives to change. No point fussing about it now.
    6 points
  30. One nice thing about not waiting until graduation is the possibility of better financial aid, like Pell Grant. They can file as independent once married.
    6 points
  31. I would shrug and say that there are plenty of statistics that show marriages are much more stable if you wait until both people are over 25 (neurological adults) to marry. At the same time people aren’t statistics. I know plenty of people who married their high school (and in one case middle school) sweethearts and are still together. And I know some who are divorced. Ultimately what DD and FSIL decide is up to them. If I thought they brought out the best in each other I’d encourage them to do whatever they thought best.
    6 points
  32. I'm trying to decide if they are the type to expect their concerns to be taken as the way things should be, or as something to think about. I'm hoping they can get used to the idea, and be calmer about it in a couple years.
    6 points
  33. People from South America are doing this and today I saw one about Asians doing this too. And for me, it is mindblowing too. Especially since it seems that all too many people end up with a life like mine after COVID. I was so happy to get the vaccine.
    6 points
  34. Works on my unvaccinated son's arm too. Now he thinks mom is weird...nevermind, he already knew that.
    6 points
  35. I'm filled with love and joy. That's all.
    5 points
  36. From some conversations with my DD, I think he's making 30-40k two years out. They've had many discussions which is good, because my dh and I did not have a lot of discussions. Sounds like he might like to work for himself someday and be a sahd. His parents were quite upset by that idea too. I'm glad they are discussing things now, and finding out how the different parents think. It is always good to start somewhere even if ideas change as they go along. Kelly
    5 points
  37. None of the schools that accepted my kid had the option to do placement tests until pretty far in the process. It kind of makes sense-they don’t want you doing course placement, scheduling, and advising at multiple schools. Now, for the state U, you can game that system by subscribing to ALEKS and doing it at home first, and if you have transfer or AP credits you can usually skip the math placement unless you want to try to place higher than the typical placement (like, say, if you took AP calc at school, but self-studied beyond it). Some schools also have a minimum placement based on ACT math score and if you’re happy with that, you can just go from there. But yes, I can see how a student can get very emotionally committed to a school, have bragged that they were going there to all their friends, etc, only to bomb the placement test and feel stuck.
    5 points
  38. You are looking at the wrong publics. My kids avg class has had 20-30so students. They may have had the odd class with 90-250 lectures with an additional 15 student recitation section. (Intro physics, intro accting are 2 I can think if that were on the large side.) They have never sat in a class with a 1000 students. (At small publics that is about 1/10 of their student body. 🙂 )
    5 points
  39. Just had this issue yesterday. Dd started in the fall so first summer with swimming as an issue. She wasn’t ready to try a tampon until she got an invite to go swimming at a friends house. She decided to give it a try and she did great with it and she is so happy to have this new option. (She is just turned 13 yo). The products today are much more user friendly than when I was 12 and having swimming emergencies! I went to target and bought every variety of “light” size. They are pretty small. Then I brought them home and we opened them all up and studied them (LOL) and she decided which she wanted to try. She did great with it. So, Saturday she didn’t think she was ready to try, yesterday she tried because she wanted to swim with a friend, today she is wearing them even not swimming just because she thinks it is the greatest option and so much more comfortable than a pad. So that is just an encouragement to maybe see if she wants to try. I couldn’t believe it went as smoothly as it did. We both did a serious happy dance that she has this option now. I really had thought this was going to be a much harder thing to do than it ended up being. Good luck. I, also, had forgotten my plans to order a period swimsuit before this came up.
    5 points
  40. I wonder if they'll be calmer as things develop on the plan that your daughter was already thinking about, just because more time will have passed. Husband and I met my freshman year of college - I had told my parents about this 'older' guy that I had met, so they were relieved when they met him to find that we were 2 years apart in school and less than that as an age difference. They feared I had met a 40 year old. 🙂 We started discussing marriage my senior year - he was in grad school. Our families both wanted us to finish grad school before we got married. After the first year of grad school I told him that this was ridiculous. We were both pursuing PhDs so would have been dating for 10 years by the time we were done. I figured that once you move from just making dinner plans to making life plans that involve another person, it's time to go ahead and get married. We lived 1 1/2 hrs apart during grad school but got married after my 2nd year - we continued to live apart for another 3 years after we were married (we saw each other on weekends), something not uncommon in academia. But, after long enough together you start doing things like mingling finances - even without a marriage or shared account, you find yourselves doing things like saying that you'll buy a new couch that you choose together and whichever of you has the most $ pays for the car repair and one of you buys 2 season football tickets and...and none of that makes sense for uncommitted people, and if you're committed and wanting to get married, then what are you waiting for? By that point, our parents didn't say anything - we were in our earlyish 20s, so it wasn't their decision, and we had been together for quite a while. We had lived independently. There weren't really any other adulting metrics for them to be concerned about. But, I"m guessing that if we had told them when we were 19 and 21 that we were going to get married and live apart halfway through grad school they would have tried to dissuade us. Maybe her situation will be similar? Funny enough, our unconventional living arrangements turned out to be great prep for our actual marriage - over the years spouse has traveled for work a lot - often 2-3 weeks a month but mostly home on weekends...the same pattern that worried people when we first got married. 🙂
    5 points
  41. I’d never say it to my DD, but if I’m understanding you correctly...and she is going away 6 hours from her boyfriend, I’d wish she would break up or take a break, with the understanding she would be dating other people at college. I’d want her feel free to be on her own, with some physical and emotional distance, at an age and point in her life where she could explore other relationships, and not feel guilty if she is attracted to someone else.
    5 points
  42. If the goal is to show rigor and open up college possibilities and/or merit aid and scholarships, then it doesn't really matter a ton if the college she eventually attends gives her credit for any dual enrollment courses or not. The goal of helping her open college doors will have been met. That said, there are ways to show rigor at home. I mean, if you're doing all honors level work, just label it all honors. Get your home AP courses approved. Choose one targeted outside class to spring for if you can. Or, specifically put in your school profile that you didn't label home based courses as honors because they all represent high level work - things like that contextualize their read of the work performed. Write up course descriptions, even if they're not requested, that show college textbooks or lots of depth or long book lists or whatever. We used dual enrollment in large part because it gave ds a mental health boost to see that he could succeed in college and as a kid who has issues with test taking, it helped him do that one or two things to verify his education since he's applying test optional to most schools. That's not necessary for all kids... but it's also often really good for kids who have social needs that can't be met by a homeschool community.
    5 points
  43. @BusyMom5 Harvard isn’t accepting *intellectually* disadvantaged kids in a push for diversity. I’m sure I must be reading your post wrong, because it seems as if you’re saying that most disadvantaged students are better suited to trades. I’m all for admitting a diverse student body to elite institutions - it’s well past time to level the playing field. I do think there should be support in place, similar to that of the POSSE program (I so hate that name) that I linked earlier, for first gen students and students whose prior educational experiences might not have adequately prepared them for university.
    5 points
  44. This is Gaia.😀
    5 points
  45. Chicken Tika Masala -yum yum yum Naan bread is delicious, too Tandoori chicken is kind of an easy "gateway" into Indian food, although not really easy to do at home. Do you have an Indian restaurant near you? Some of them have buffets so you can try a little of many things. Just stay away from anything "vindaloo" if you don't like spicy! 🔥
    5 points
  46. For me it's chickens. I know all about taking care of chickens. I would have to be very poor (or otherwise desperate) to have chickens of my own as an adult. I think we were much less intentional in making sure our boys had various experiences than many of you. Mostly we just lived our normal lives, and we talked a lot about a wide variety of things, and we taught them how to use the internet. They've had no trouble making their way in the world so far.
    5 points
  47. The problem is that most of us would probably define that list of “quite a lot of things” entirely differently from each other. Many of the things my ds21 needs to know for his daily life are probably completely different from the things other people’s kids need to know for their daily lives. Our environment plays a big role in what we consider to be important to know. I’m sure a rural farmer’s family would consider my ds to be ignorant of many of the things that are second nature to them, but I hope they wouldn’t consider it “unfortunate” that ds doesn’t know those things. I would hope they would realize that he has no need to know those things — just as I would hope my ds would be understanding toward a kid who didn’t know a lot of the things that my ds takes for granted as being “normal” for us.
    5 points
  48. I don’t know that I “intentionally” did all that many things, and I certainly didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about it. We have always just lived a normal life, and that has seemed to provide a wide variety of experiences.
    5 points
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