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Showing content with the highest reputation on 01/18/2019 in all areas

  1. 23 points
    Having few material things by choice is not bad at all. Having a low income, especially by choice, is not neccessarily bad either. Having an income that is insufficient, despite one's best efforts, to house, feed, warm and clothe oneself, and engage in broader society (in terms of education, culture, health, leisure) - that is actually 'not good'. Let's not spin poverty as 'not bad'.
  2. 22 points
    I am going in the middle of the night tonight. I am going to be kid-less and DH-less for 6 whole days 🙂 I am going to look after my grandmother for 6 days while her partner has surgery and is in hospital. I am so excited. I have only had in the last 25 years overnighters away from everyone (not including time in hospital) and that has only really been for specialized training for the twins My grandmother is pretty excited as well.
  3. 22 points
    There is a world of difference between "low income and having few material things" and poverty. They are not remotely the same. Poverty is consistently not having enough to meet basic survival needs (such as food, basic shelter, clean water) for yourself and your family. That doesn't have anything to do with the media. I provide support/volunteer with organizations that help Native Americans on the Pine Ridge (& other) reservations in South Dakota. I am familiar with the conditions there and I can say, hands down, true poverty is bad. Really bad. None of those people hope to reach middle class. That's a pipe dream, and they know it. But perhaps some disaster assistance after a major hailstorm (which followed a tornado) would be nice. But they don't even qualify for that. I recently gave some money to a leader there who was trying to supply firewood to the elders, because they have old people who literally freeze to death in their own homes, every year. Or take the poverty in Alabama, where raw sewage is floating in people's yards and they don't have the money to fix it, and hookworm is now a problem. That's poverty, and yet we pretend it doesn't exist, or blame the people in those conditions for not being able to help themselves even though they have zero resources, low education, low nutrition, and very limited job opportunities. And yet, somehow, we always have money for corporate welfare and taking care of the haves.
  4. 17 points
    Just thought I'd update: Dh is out of ICU as of yesterday, still in isolation though b/c of the legionella. On the renal ward. Very weak, very thin, but improving. He avoided emergency dialysis by the skin of his teeth, and kidney function since that low point has actually improved. I did not cope well with the IL's. I may have raised my voice to my MIL. I don't care. I have zero care to give other than paying the rent, feeding the kids, and getting dh back on his feet - literally. I laid down the law also - either dh takes responsibility for his health from now on, and that means abiding by his kidney disease guidelines re fluids, diet, seeking medical care and information as required and taking my concerns when I have them seriously, or he can move back wth his parents. I am totally fried by the whole experience and have nothing left in the tank other than helping someone who is helping himself. We'll see.
  5. 17 points
    I've been wanting a grandchild for some time but even so, I didn't realize how much love I would have for one. She has taken my breath away. Here she is learning to roll over. I love how with the advent of smart phones I can see these little small snatches of her life.
  6. 16 points
    That’s a pretty poor article. The facts (as reported) seem to be that the HSLDA is interested in homeschool “outreach” in Russia (as it is in many foreign countries) and has therefore facilitated and sponsored conferences there. The conferences involved some unsavoury people who (in addition to being pro-homeschooling) are also (allegedly) politically responsible for promoting (variously) military action and/or repressively ultra-conservative legislation through their own government. They have influence in their own circles, and the US has sanctioned them for the ways they have used it. The implications and insinuations around “why this matters” are vague and poorly written, using alarmist rhetoric without much substance. Is HSLDA “in cahoots” in a secret anti-democracy plan? Are they under Russian influence? If so, for what purpose? Is the HSLDA supporting the Russians? Are they being duped? Hacked? Are they anti-American just by association? Is it just “bad” that some people in Russia who like homeschooling aren’t good people? Is their interest in homeschooling false, and infiltration their real goal? The writer seems to neither know nor care which conclusions a reader reaches based on the article’s insinuations... as long as it’s alarming and anti-right-wing. Terrible journalism.
  7. 15 points
    When I was into my homeschooling journey people told me over and over "You need another interest, you can't make your kids your whole life, what will you do when they are grown? How will you let them go after centering your whole life around them??" Years after homeschooling is over the answer is easy. Grandchildren. Grown children. I am blessed enough that our three boys live within 2 minutes or 20 minutes down the road, and our two daughters 90 minutes away. My "other interests" are things that include the kids. Horses, gardening, living on a farm. We have big family dinners once or twice a week for anyone who can make it. I have the grandkids as often as possible. I do things for the grown kids when they need me, whether it's help finding a lost kitty or cooking dinner for 20 people because you lost a poker game. I'm not trying to brag on myself, I just want to encourage young moms who center their lives around their family. Keep it up girls. There's nothing better. Relax and enjoy.
  8. 15 points
    Did you actually read it? Because that is not what it says.
  9. 14 points
    Thanks. That was an interesting article. I did not get 'there's no point in even trying' from the article. I do think the idea of poverty as a disease is interesting; to me the model seems to have greater potential for reducing poverty effects long term. The model seems to fit well also into the idea of providing social and financial support to pregnant women, mothers and small children as a way of improving long term outcomes.
  10. 13 points
    Wanting to believe that growing scientific evidence is wrong is entirely different from scientific evidence being wrong. And pretending that people want to lift those in poverty by reducing the resources of low and middle income families is made up crazy talk.
  11. 11 points
    Good Morning! Happy Friday! My mom just sent me an email that my dad is doing great today. The neuro asked him to do several tasks (thumbs up, squeeze her hand, wiggle toes, etc.) and he was able to do all of them. :)
  12. 10 points
    I found it quite interesting. It also made me think of the new studies relating the amount of childhood trauma to problems later in life. It seems that research is showing more and more that we need to address poverty, dysfunction, mental health, substance abuse, etc before children are even conceived, as the longer we wait, the more costly the remedies and the lower the chances of success. And it reinforced my belief that two of the most important things we can do to help with generational poverty are to make excellent public education available to all, including real s*x education, and also make effective birth control easily and cheaply available. It never ceases to amaze me that we can live in such a rich, developed country and still have such high rates of unplanned pregnancies. Thankfully, we finally seem to be doing much better with teen pregnancy rates. It also makes sense to implement some of the research proven strategies he discussed for helping parents make good choices for the long term. And perhaps increasing programs like the EITC that have proven effective for lifting people out of poverty while not making them deal with all of the hassle that can accompany so many other programs for low income families. Although the author experienced the chronic stress of poverty and lacked good education in his younger years, he definitely seemed helped later by quality education, mentors, and delaying parenting until his own life was on track. And he didn’t mention experiencing other traumas such as violence or abuse or family chaos and dysfunction that can compound the effects of poverty. So it seems like he had a good head start right there, despite the poverty.
  13. 10 points
    The accusations of cheating generally depend on a combination of (1) a significant score increase plus (2) "similarities" between the accused student's answers and answers of another student who happened to be sitting nearby. The suspect scores are flagged by an algorithm, not by a human proctor who saw actual evidence of cheating. Even if the similarities in answers were based on copying from a neighbor (which is pretty hard to do if seats are as far apart as they are supposed to be and the proctor is reasonably observant), automatically assuming that the student whose score improved was the cheater, with no other evidence, is ridiculous. Students are not only being accused of cheating based on nothing more than a statistical algorithm, they are for all intents and purposes being convicted of cheating with zero actual evidence. The "appeal" process is a joke — no one has ever won on appeal, no matter how much evidence was presented. Not only is there no presumption of "innocent until proven guilty," it's not even a matter of "guilty until proven innocent" — because there is literally no way for students to prove their innocence. And as if that isn't egregious enough, the ACT often waits as much as a year after the test was taken to inform the student that their scores are being invalidated. Given that most students take these tests as juniors and seniors, by the time they're informed that their scores were thrown out, it's often too late to retake the tests for admissions and scholarship purposes. And at the same time, both the ACT and College Board knowingly ignore the HUGE problems with blatant cheating by international students, because they make a ton of money from international tests and don't want to lose that revenue.
  14. 10 points
    I literally serve soup in the pot. I don’t own any tureens, it comes straight out of the cooking vessel. But we don’t put dishes on the table for serving, they stay in the kitchen and people go over to them to serve themselves. Less mess and more table space that way!
  15. 9 points
    My brother lives in turkey. He texted me this video. It’s dreadful. Not only is it now in my YouTube History, but I’ve been humming rocket man for two whole days. only a little brother can pester a sister nonstop for two days from a totally different continent!!!! now that’s talent.
  16. 9 points
    Also, I forgot to update that I got into the nursing program that I wanted. I started orientation 3 days ago! So, happy days are here again. 🙂
  17. 9 points
    My one year surgiversary (1/17/18-1/17/19) was yesterday, so I figured that I would post an update. Pounds lost: 67 (217 to 150) BMI: From 37.2 to 25.7 Inches lost (hips): 9 Inches lost (waist): 10 Inches lost (bust): 8 Inches lost (thighs, each): 6 Inches lost (arms, each): 3 Inches lost (calves, each): 3 12 months later, I am still losing, and all my labs looks perfect. No pain and no complications whatsoever. Most days, I forget that I even had surgery. Thank you all for the tremendous support and encouragement. It made a huge difference knowing that I had so many people cheering me on. I meant to take a pic yesterday, but it was raining, and well, Southern Californians don't do rain. So, a few recent pics instead (these were from our cruise a month ago -- I am down 5 lbs since then):
  18. 9 points
    My brain refused to brain today. I have caffeinated it, and I'm feeding it, but I think it wants to binge watch Cadfael and then go to bed and spend all afternoon dreaming. I need another warm day where I can go to the lake or the river and soak up some inspiration. Not going to get it, though.
  19. 9 points
    We got the moving truck to take our crap to the pods since we can't park here. We scheduled everything for a Wednesday because 2 people said they could help but both backed out and changing the date will cost money so we're moving ourselves. We don't have much to move at least. And John is very helpful. Hoping to hear back from the piano people today. And hoping my dad gets his car fixed. Tomorrow we finish the books and stuffed animals and Monday I want to get our clothes in order. All the hangining things and accessories can be packed. I'm mostly going in the order of Konmarie's book and purging as I go.
  20. 9 points
    Very interesting. I see the things he's talking about in a volunteer position all the time. It's sad and can feel hopeless. The observable effects are well known by those working with people experiencing generational poverty. I really appreciate that he tried to identify not just the root problems but directions to address these issues.
  21. 9 points
    Get rid of the shelves then, too. Why have storage furniture if you don't need to store stuff?
  22. 8 points
    I read the article--some last night and the rest this morning and I am going to read it again. I forwarded it to dh. I liked it. A lot. I would say what he described is definitely reality for an entire demographic. I have been leaning toward this line of thinking for a while. My brain keeps saying 'there has got to be more to 'this' than meets the eye.' I found it helpful in that I can reframe my opinion of 'choices' people make. I have been so thoroughly disgusted by some in poverty before--and I don't want to be. I have slowly been working toward understanding and this article helped me toward that end.
  23. 8 points
    They did have that choice. Oldest ds was gone for 10 years counting college but eventually moved home with my darling dil and three girls. Youngest dd lived in Alabama a while then Idaho a while and made it home. Thankfully right now everyone is nearby. Who knows if it will last, but I'm gonna enjoy it while it does.
  24. 7 points
    Fascinating articled I stumbled upon today: https://getpocket.com/explore/item/why-poverty-is-like-a-disease I am still digesting it and need to give it another read, but many here have discussed issues covered in this article so I thought it may make for some discussion.
  25. 7 points
    In the past, i have always been a declutter queen. I literally wrote a book on this subject. But I have changed in some ways in the past five or so years. I’m more reluctant to get rid of things. A lot of it has to do with closing chapters. So, for example: while I was still in the thick of raising kids, it was easy-peasy to declutter a whole bunch of toys that were not their favorites, were too hard to use/set up/play, that had grown ugly or unappealing, etc. It was not even hard for me to move along homeschooling materials, books, manipulatives. It was easy so long as it was simply getting the excess out. But the meaning has changed; now, it is about closing those chapters of my life. And it is hard. I have beautiful Usborne books that have CDs with them. My youngest adored them. It doesn’t make much sense to keep them, as far as future grandchildren or such are concerned. Listening to a book CD is dying out. Even if I gave this to my sister for her young kids, I don’t think it would be cherished by them, and something about that is just unbearable to me. So I will probably keep them, even though they are serving no purpose except that they’re there, and the are so lovely. Anyway...all that to say, decluttering when it is ending an era of my life is different, harder. It’s harder to objectively come to grips with, “well, I don’t need this at all, and the younge moms will want something more modern than this.”
  26. 7 points
    We are sending piano info to a non-profit that connects students to free instruments. We gave the apartment our notice.
  27. 7 points
    This is kind of an oversimplification. One can be “lucky” that they got good parenting, had supportive friends, or found a suitable charity to help them. That’s why we do all of these things.
  28. 7 points
    I declare the first goodwill-item reselling experiment a success! After everything is factored in, I made almost $65 selling the wakeboard I found.
  29. 7 points
    Back from the mall, the dentist, and grocery pickup. I missed my nap today, but I'm surviving. Dad is still in the hospital, but is recovering ok.
  30. 7 points
    I'm glad that she is doing well. Thanks for sharing the information. When dd8 was in utero, we knew she had a 50/50 chance of having a birth defect. We also knew that she had a hole in her heart. She had a cardiac echo a few hours after being born and we were told that she would be fine without surgery. I was so relieved. I hope that your precious little one recovers quickly. Hugs to all of you!
  31. 6 points
    I have not read all the responses, but a few things: 1.A-there are degrees of poverty and I believe that the article is referencing the lowest level. Or the worst off. I am not going to go into it, but where I came from, the picture of that horrible place he showed would have been considered fine to good. Some people that talk about being poor like this really just have no idea. Some people TRULY DON'T HAVE ANYTHING. "It's a mindset" my backside! 1.B- Everyone IMO thinks they absolutely DO have some idea and everyone who talks about stuff like this thinks their own heart is in the right place. 2- I am not enamored with the writer's inspired poverty-as-disease, which is evidently new to him. It is not new to most people. Go get your ACE score! I am willing to bet that if your grew up in a place like that^^^ it's wicked high. 2.B- The optimism in this article about considering extreme poverty a disease having a positive effect on the lives of the extremely impoverished is misplaced IMO. The closing sentiment of not continuing to see the very poor as simply too stupid to harness globalism (or whatever) is on point, though. 3- Americans tend to talk about the very very poor as if they are something altogether separate from themselves, like down on their luck vampires or Elizabethan courtiers . And everyone and their mother in law knows what THEY need, dontchaknow. When, in fact, they just need the same freaking things everyone else needs. 4- Capitalism thrives with an underclass. While middle class citizens wring their hands over the poor, the people with actual power shrug and/or smile and dig into their cake. There is a reason for that. 4.B- Oh, I'm sorry this should be 4.A: surprise!! America has an underclass. This appears to be new news to some of my peers.
  32. 6 points
    It's FRIDAY!!! And therefore HULA!!! There just can never be enough (or too much) aloha in the world. 🙂 So here's some aloha from me to you. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
  33. 6 points
    I don't think slanted is really the right way to characterise it. It's coming from a particular point of view, sure, but that doesn't mean that it is either wrong, or dishonest in the inks it is making. Given some of the really weird stuff going on now with certain right-wing groups and Russia, it is really interesting to see that an organisation like HSLDA is working so much in Russia and even just taking such an interest. Is it naive, or something else? What is driving that interest?
  34. 6 points
    edpo I think I need to get Twilight Sparkle a new math book. I was hoping she’d be able to tackle BA 2A next but it’s too much. I wonder how much curriculum I’ll be able to re-use on her. I have a feeling she might be a very different student than my first two. Booyah!
  35. 6 points
    Three of my dad's nurses at the hospital have the same names as three of my girls. My parents are (somehow?) comforted by this.
  36. 6 points
    Good Morning!!! no COFFEE!!!~D yet because I am still in bed.😂😂😂😂 I just didn’t feel like getting up, so I grabbed the iPad and am ITTing from bed. The kitchen is on the other side of the house from my bedroom, so i’m Waiting on the COFFEE!!!~D. Friday!!! Gotta take DD1 to get her allergy shots. Then off to DS1’s school to talk to the principal for a few minutes. Gotta get school in there sometime, too. And I need to clean the house. It is a disaster.
  37. 6 points
    The bolded. Now I will remember this when I am inclined to say 'why can't they at least clean up their yard.' The complete solution is probably out of reach for humans. I can however change my thinking on it which in turn will lead me to be helpful when possible.
  38. 6 points
    I have come to think of deep poverty as a disease based on observation. I wouldn't say that it is hopeless but the long-term effects are as potentially crippling as medical illnesses can be. I live in a neighborhood that is a mix of generationally poor families in subsidized rental housing, elderly people barely hanging on, and middle class owners (mostly single people)......very few of which are able/interested in maintaining their properties adequately. The very poor make choices that I can observe that are completely perplexing to my always-middle-class brain. Until I read a few books and experienced close relationships with people in this situation, I was inclined to believe that their bad choices caused their poverty rather than their poverty driving their bad choices. Even a very surface head shake wondering why people would fill their yards with garbage or accumulate several junk cars makes sense when you realize the insides of their slumlord-owned homes are so bleak that what happens in the yard is of little concern. It is purely anecdotal, but I was once very close to woman who grew up in an extremely poor and unstable home. She also spent many years in the foster care system and in fact aged out while in foster care. She was lucky in that she stumbled upon support and help that is not common for someone in her situation and by the time I met her, she was married and firmly in the middle class bucket. But she was never able to change her brain to be middle class. I watched over 10 years as it all unraveled, largely because she could never adjust her impulses away from the fight-or-flight mentality that was ingrained in her from her childhood poverty and instability. She was absolutely powerless to change this even though she was aware of it and actively sought to "correct" it. She is very intelligent and had read books and saw therapists trying to address this. She KNEW it was interfering with her choices and relationships. She was not successful. Her marriage disintegrated as her husband never could understand why she did the things she did. Once divorced, an unplanned pregnancy, what I would consider poor financial decisions that seemed perfectly rational to someone inside her brain, and an injury that made her unable to work has landed her in hopeless poverty again. That injury is a perfect example of the different choices the very poor make from middle class people. It happened at her job and in her experience people who reported injuries at work would get fired. So she didn't. Which meant she eventually got fired anyway because she could no longer do the job well and she did not get any workman's comp to boot. The hope is gone. So much so that she has pushed away all of her middle class friends....mostly because she is embarrassed by what she has become again. There IS something to this. It is not impossible to work your way up and bootstraps and all that stuff, but to deny that the cards are significantly stacked against the very poor is just cruel.
  39. 6 points
    I sent my bro the video. His response “that was bizarre. But I’m impervious to your efforts.” Rats
  40. 6 points
    Good morning! It's Friday! Lessons! Steps! Coffee!
  41. 6 points
    Good morning. Coffee has been consumed, but I can make more for Slache. Got to get moving!
  42. 6 points
    Hope little Emma has a smooth recovery. Can someone tell me what a "sip read" is? In the last couple of days, I finished The Prophet of Yonwood and The Diamond of Darkhold (pre-reads for kids) - didn't like book 3 at all, but book 4 was fine. I'll have the kids skip book 3 when they read the series. Next up, I'm leaving the kid lit behind and going to a Puritan: John Owen's The Mortification of Sin. I also finished my devotional commentary, The Victory According to Mark. I disagreed with the author on a couple of things, but in general it was a pretty good book, and there were some points he made that I found really insightful. My next book for personal devotions will be 2 Samuel: Out of Every Adversity. I read the author's commentary on 1 Samuel and really liked it, so I'm looking forward to this one.
  43. 6 points
    So far I am not loving Tchaikovsky's 1st Symphony. Hopefully it will grow on me when I have learned my part better. We have 2 more rehearsals to pull it together. My sister had some drains put in today for pockets of fluid they found on the scan. I suspect they are secretly turning her into The Borg. Resistance is futile. Hopefully this will help her heart rate/blood pressure normalize. I should be sleeping.
  44. 6 points
    Articles like this just reek of "the deck is stacked against you, so don't even try." I get that the more problems you have in life, the more problems those problems create. I just refuse to buy into the idea that our lives are based ONLY on luck and that our own choices have nothing to do with it. If our choices have no effect on how our lives turn out, then there's really not much point in parenting, or supporting friends, or contributing to charities, because life will just turn out however luck and chance says so. In reality, I believe that as much as genetics and biology DO play a role, as well as just straight past experience, our own choices have a LOT of influence on how our lives actually turn out. And the truth is if a person tries, they might not succeed, and some folks are less likely to succeed than others. But never trying.....that's never going to help. Generally speaking, good choices are more likely to yield good results than bad choices.
  45. 6 points
    I've been wearing my sweater (with hood) inside-out all day. 'Nuff said.
  46. 6 points
    @Lady Florida. I made a point of getting on this afternoon to see if there were any updates on Emma. Glad to hear it's over and she'd doing well. She (and you) have been on my mind all day. Any updates from Tuesday??? Lovely! I'm so glad you had an awesome day together. This looks incredible. I love the story behind it too. A few years ago I read a book that's hard to find but in this genre ... the how to be a charming 1930's hostess if you are from a wealthy east coast family genre. Entertaining is Fun by Dorothy Draper. I will warn that it is dated in a way that can be so charming at times (Of course, we need to invite our DH's boss over for dinner! It's necessary for his wife to be charming to further his career.) and at other times very cringe-y (be sure to hire black musicians for your parties). This is the way our grandparents would have entertained. Gin and Tonics for everybody as soon as they walk in the door. Make sure your butler knows this!
  47. 6 points
    Bowls. I've found that plates don't work so well.
  48. 5 points
    You know, I really think we need an ITT field trip, just to check in the accuracy of your statement, Ellie. I think we need to spend a week or two in Hawaii, just to make sure that there really can never be enough aloha in the world.
  49. 5 points
    I thought the suggestion section was weak, but one of the things he touched on was financially incentivizing helpful prioritization behavior, like getting the kids to school every day on time. I felt like he kind of tacked that stuff on, and didn’t really think it through. Policies, IME, are not as workable as determined, loving, local people who teach and who refuse to give up. But, I imagine that the combo would be the best. Still, a determined, loving, teaching, local person who refuses to give up is going to trump everything else. That’s the Marva way, for instance. Or the former principal of one of our local elementary schools, who basically set out to uplift a whole neighborhood from that job vantage point, and who accomplished a ton. Bureaucracy always can steamroller over those individual efforts, particularly in the long run, but it usually can’t negate them completely at least for those being helped in the moment. The starfish analogy holds here.
  50. 5 points
    A sip read is something you plan to read over a long period of time in small bits. There are definitely better explanations but since I was posting I thought I would give you mine.😉 I finished listening to the second Gamache A Fatal Grace and while it’s foundational to the series I understand why I stopped with this book years ago and took a multi year time out with the series. This book sort of lacked the magic ..... dark foreshadowing for the future. References that are somewhat unexplained. Anyway I am going to take a break for a few days at least and listen to something different. I am getting close to finishing spelling Hecule Poirot as I knew I needed to get it done while I still had all those vowels in my stack. Book titles with words starting with vowels can be a challenge to find for those who haven’t tried one of Robin’s spelling challenges. I finished The Law of Angels late last night so Hercule now has an L. I have been enjoying this series set in Yorkshire during the reign of Richard the Second. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9092374-the-law-of-angels.
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