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  2. Sorry to keep posting here, but I'm getting excited about the thought of growing things and all this rearranging. Where are your pictures of your kids??? If you want to BE in this room, don't you want the pictures of things/people you love?? So one of those walls needs to start to have a serious montage of pictures of your favorite people. Do you use a laptop stand? You can add your phone pics to your amazon cloud account and get them to show up on your tv screen saver. I was thinking you could put your kids over the plant stand (because both grow), but that's a little weird. Just another wall. The poppy wall if you put the tv over the mantle. If you don't put the tv on the mantle, then a family portrait on the mantle might be lovely. I'm in picture mode, haha. You can see with my other thread. I guess you could do ledges if you want. Or just have people bang and hang pictures. I'll bet you have tons of them with all your kids, mercy. Have you ever made a collage? Here's the software I've used. You'll love it. You can make something big with tons of your happy pictures and then print it as a vinyl cling to stick on the wall. Or print onto canvas. http://www.shapecollage.com
  3. What I mean is, if your student can, if forced to, write a 1K word paper in a coherent fashion and express their view points in a way that is understandable and meaningful, that is about the level required by most Universities. It isn't the average college student who is cranking out 20-100 page thesis papers for 5 different classes every term starting freshman year. Your highschool student doesn't need to be at that level when they first step foot on campus. But that seems to be the argument I see on here at times. Or that only the very best writing skills will allow one to succeed in college.
  4. Today was definitely a better day. He was calmer, and being able to communicate helped. Plus his math tutor came and they spent 90 minutes doing some kind of blindfold chess puzzles. I'm not sure I understand exactly, but he was smiling a little, and calm, and so distracted by the chess that DH and I were able to step outside the room at the same time, Facetime with our other kids, and eat actual food. So, definitely a win. Tomorrow's goal is the lungs. His eye looks and feels so much better, it's obviously responding to the meds, but his lungs aren't bouncing back the way they have from previous anesthesias. Hopefully they just need a little more time.
  5. I think that often as well...numerous books I have given five-star, glowing reviews never get a “like”. I burn down the house on a bad book and people love it! 🤔
  6. Fwiw, that's what my dd was doing before we went her away. They'll use the illustration of a porcupine getting really prickly when it's in danger. So you knew something was wrong, but you weren't sure what. Now he's telling you what. Whoa, then you've been slammed all these years! I think the hardest part is we all wish we were perfect and could be perfect parents. You can't change the past, but you can certainly change the present and the FUTURE. If you get your ds diagnosed, you can do the SPARK study and get some genetic feedback eventually. It might be very interesting to you or maybe to your ds. Good, I'm glad you're seeing some paths forward! The key is not to lose it. Make some decisions, send some emails, start some balls rolling. That I agree with. So this is not about Rosie but about the op. It seemed like op was really in a well if we get counseling, ds can choose to do better, defective ds will choose to do better. Reality is the stats are pretty ugly on comorbidity of ASD and some kind of mental health diagnosis. Now sure, there are similar stats for ADHD, SLDs, and so on. I'm totally with you. But if we ignore the mental health side, the physical side, the chemical side, we're probably also not getting as far as we could. It's just something to put on the table. I don't know the dc. I'm just saying while you're asking questions, ask more of them. My ds is a lot more of a pain in the butt when his chemistry is not right. Tonight he brought me grape juice. Like I was eating pizza and the kid goes out to get himself something to drink and offers to bring me some. Do you know how ASTONISHING that is? And all I did was raise his 5HTP dose again. The interplay between the chemistry of mental health and the symptoms we're living with is kind of tricky. It's really not helpful (or accurate) to assume EVERYTHING is volitional and that if the person didn't WANT to be a (animal part) they wouldn't be. Sometimes it's better living through chemistry. Sometimes chemistry helps a person RECEIVE the good instruction they're being given. I'm really in the "all of the above" camp on that. I think we have to address ALL of a person, not just one aspect.
  7. I have no good ideas, but I love Peter Pan’s creativity here!! Anne
  8. We don't have strays--the LGDs kill them. They see them as a threat to the flock and herd. The lady hasn't gotten back with dd, so no kitten yet. Dd really wants a Manx this year. Her two cats are strays. The remaining cat at our house is a hand-me-down from another dd's flight school days.
  9. This is helpful and reassuring. Thank you. This is, too. Thank you. Did having a c-section/taking medication afterward interfere with nursing?
  10. My mind was right there with yours. I was pleasantly surprised to open this and find something I could show my kids!
  11. It was a good day. The Children's Choir concert was amazing and had me in a puddle of tears. Dd17 made it into mid-state orchestra for the first time in a few years (and she placed very well!) and we are so happy for her. She struggles with anxiety and nerves and because her tendons/ligaments are crazy, any nervous muscle tension makes it hard to function at all, so this was a particularly special achievement for her. The kids are at a youth group Christmas party. I'm ready to hit the sack.
  12. Just an aside, ds is at a technical school and they require one writing class each year (you must space them) -- two course in the Humanities, Arts, or Social Sciences (HASS) and two in your major. If you do a double major you must have 2 in EACH major in addition to the 2 HASS writing classes. This writing requirement is for all the engineers, scientists, economists, and mathematicians. For mathematics, you can either take a research class where you write up your research and also orally present it, or you can take a paper reading course where you read actually mathematical literature and then write papers and do oral presentations on it. They take the ability to communicate very seriously even though very few students there are actually humanities majors.
  13. What piece would make YOUR life good? I would start there and then buy all the other furniture to fit. Most people can sit on anything and like variety. You could hang a swinging egg chair in the corner by that odd door you don't like. Seriously, I so totally would, lol. You'll have to reinforce the ceiling to do it, but sure hang a swinging chair. People like variety. For you, what would be ideal? A couch with a chaise? A recliner that has a lift and a massaging function? A Benedict Cumberbatch shaped chair you can fall into on a hard day? Haha, I don't know. So yeah, I'd start with what you want and then let the person helping you pick out things to go around it to seat as many people as you want flexible. For the games, you can have a folding card table or a drop leaf table and just pull in chairs. Here's that chair for the corner. Greenstell Rattan Wicker Egg Hammock Chair with Hanging Kits,Weather Fastness Hanging Chair with Comfortable Red Cushion and Pillow,Basket Swing Chair for Indoor,Outdoor Bedroom,Patio,Garden (Brown)
  14. okay I literally laughed out loud at your "drunk browsing Amazon" comment!! That is epic! Oh and my most liked review on GRs is also one of my most negative reviews. What does that say about us as a culture 🙂 😕 🤣
  15. I thought I had all the logistics for tomorrow's schedule worked out with the van in the shop and then dh told me that the choir is singing in both services tomorrow. Oy.
  16. Couldn’t find a single baby shark at IKEA East Palo Alto 😞 Went there to buy a pot and wanted to get the baby shark for my kids. ETA: My husband found one while I am still in the queue to pay.
  17. Do you like bird feeders? Hummingbird feeders? You could stick a hummingbird feeder on that glass door and get visitors. If in the spring you do some containers on that porch and put up a feeder, you'll assuredly get visitors. You could also grow some succulents. You could do plant stands in front of that stationary door. Ikea probably has some on the cheap. Do you like wind chimes? You could put a wind chime on the porch. You can do all these things that connect you to the outside. Are your wheels able to go through the door? Or they can but it's hard to get the door open? Could you go through a sliding door better? Or could it be switched to french doors so you could get through them more easily? That's a more expensive fix, so I'm just thinking out loud. But yeah, definitely think through what could be done. To help you enjoy the space more. Bringing in your favorite colors (purple? you had a lot of purple there, lol), things you love, helping you be able to go outside independently, etc. Let us know what you do or what your decorator friend says if you talk with her!
  18. Quill, your review was much, much better than the book. More entertaining, more real, more everything.
  19. Yes!! Even just one side would be really nice. If it's deep on the left, that could be good. You need depth for board games. They really take up more space than you think, lol. I've been cleaning out my games closet, and it belched all over my couch in the most horrible mess. If you do the games, try to bring in a table, kwim? I have this antique table, I forget what it's called. Oh, drop leaf. Mine isn't a drop leaf, because it's smaller. But a drop leaf would work too. Something that could be smaller when it's two people and bigger when it's more. Or just plunk a big table where the piano is, any old table like even a dining table, and just play games. Hey, what about a pool table? That would be so stellar there. Then people would hang where you are. You can knit or whatever you do while they play pool. I love your idea to talk with your decorator friend about why. I think the colors could have an effect. I think there's also the function issue. If you want people to use a room, you have to bring in functions, things they can do there. So bring in billiards or a game table or a nintendo switch (hello, you have an awesome room for this) and people will show up. Get a chair that is really comfortable for you, something that is YOURS, and put your knitting basket there, kwim? I think the red is a little stark. Colors have emotions. Maybe have your friend help you pick a new palette. Doesn't have to cost a lot of money, just kind of pulling it together with what you like. Fresh walls, curtains from Target (or no curtains), some furniture that puts the fun in function, you can get use out of this room. What do you DO if you walk out through those patio doors? Is there a way those connect? Like is there something you need to store in this room because it's what you'll do when you go out through those doors? I'm huge on yellow. Maybe some light shades of yellow and some light blues in the fabrics would make it a little more cheery and pick up the sunshine? I don't know. Most people like neutrals, lol. But yes, I can see it's a sunny room! The trick with colors is to get a sample can ($5, just ask) and paint it on a piece of dollar tree poster board. Then you take it around each wall at different times of day so you can really see how the room will look. Ok, so my FIL was an avid gardener, and when his health declined, I got him marijuana lights. They're not really marijuana lights, but I joked they were. They have these LED grow lights, plant lights. So I think THAT is what you put on that wall where the piano is. Give the piano to your dd, who is clearly the one who loved it, and you set up a kick butt, ROLL UP planting station for yourself. Think through what it means to make it accessible. That way you get to garden inside. And you get these grow lights and you string them up along the entire length of that wall. I think if you bring in a large dining table (or have someone build you something out of old doors, whatever you've got), this can really work. You NEED to be gardening for your mental health. There's nothing wrong with your mind. So grow whatever you like and put in the lights so you can do that. It can be your Christmas present to yourself, marijuana lights. Research it, but something like this Exlenvce 1500W 1200W LED Grow Light Full Spectrum for Indoor Plants Veg and Flower,led Plant Growing Light Fixtures with Daisy Chain Function (Triple-Chips 15W LED) I think if you had two, they could run the length of that wall with a table under them. If someone will build it for you, then you could have a shelf below for storage and a narrow shelf above to hold watering cans. But you know, whatever. Found stuff, repurposed stuff is good. Personally, I wouldn't try to make it swanky, just functional. And I'd make no excuses about it. You like growing things, so you're going to grow things. And it's a great room for growing things.
  20. Here is a currently free historical romance novella for Kindle readers. It was written by an author whose book I finished this week. A Dangerous Nativity by Caroline Warfield Also currently free: Christmas Wishes: A Small Town Christmas Love Story by Krista Lakes Regards, Kareni
  21. I don't think that's really what I'm getting at, though. Frankly, some university programs aren't very good, and some aren't properly speaking university type work, they are more like technical or professional programs that have been co-located. But in terms of real university type and level work, I would be very hesitant about calls to make the production of university style writing less important. (By writing I'd include people who do it orally with a dictaphone etc as has been common for those who are blind or have other disabilities for years.) It's the fact of being able to present a complex, logical and coherent argument at a sustained high level that's the issue, and in the humanities at least it's that training through writing that develops the ability to do that kind of thinking in other mediums, or even on the fly. This has been the effect of the inclusion of so many other kinds of training at universities, somehow the particular development of that kind of complex thinking in various foundational areas, that has been a primary purpose of the university, gets sidelined, so much so that many people don't particularly notice that it even exists. It's all about the measurable outcomes, employability, getting that piece of paper because people need jobs. Yet at the moment in many countries that have followed that educational approach, it's become noticeable that even the people who are supposed to be thought leaders and influencers seem to be missing the ability to look systematically and contextually at issues and problems.
  22. Can I just take a moment and say how unusual this board is? This group truly cares for one another and I've never seen anything like it on any other board. Well done. I'm taking everything everyone of you has commented on into account. I'm going to be reading this thread for months to come. I feel like I now have a broader understanding of what my two boys -- who happen to be twins -- are each dealing with. And it's starting to look like the NT son needs more of my attention. (That said, I spent most of last year crying at the dog park b/c he was pushing me away wanting to homeschool himself. And he's good at it, so no problem there.) From the bottom of my heart, thank you so much. Alley
  23. From the perspective of someone whose priorities are vastly different than my mother's, I will say that there is only so much you can do. You can insist, through daily cgevks, that they complete the laminated checklists. Know that this might help some of them become, like you, aware about & care about the level of clean you want in your house (both normally & for guests). But, more likely, they will continue their view of your insisting on perfection (even though you just want non-gross). They may, in time, cone around. Or they may not ever. Their priorities & views are different from yours. (Lead a horse to water & all.) In my case, one of the many, many differences I have with my mother is on clothes, makeup, and appearance in general. I simply don't care. She does -- to the point that she visibly & audibly dispairs when she sees me. She would likely insist I was killing my chances for advancement if I still worked outside of the home. She will not agree to disagree. But, I am an adult that makes my own decisions & your kids will be there some day, too. My point is that you can only do so much, and when they leave your house, be prepared to let go. Good luck.
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