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  2. J-rap


    Gosh, I really feel badly that since my last post, the OP took away all of her comments. I'm really sorry -- I didn't mean to be gloom and doom. I think you had some really good suggestions from other posters! I mostly wanted to share our experience because I know how heartbreaking it can be, but sometimes it really is just a weird freakish gene that the dog has, and I didn't want you to beat yourself up about not doing something right.
  3. "Seven Pounds" (Netflix) IMO, a movie every person should see, possibly more than once. I'm glad I didn't look it up to see exactly what it was made it all the more powerful. It is...intense.
  4. Ah, gotcha. Yeah, I don't get it either, but I suppose I do get irritable when people ask me to do things when I'm doing other things, even if what I'm doing is trivial and what they want is simple.
  5. Hello. We are in our first term ( semester) of the Well trained curriculum. We are based in Australia. My son is in year 4 and my daughter is in year two. It has been a huge enterprise changing all of our curricula. We were unable to buy it all outright so we have been bits and pieces each fortnight. It's dreadfully expensive here! Here are my questions. Is Fix it grammar ( IEW) enough for my son to cover this year? it only takes us fifteen minutes a day and I am concerned it is leaving out other important components in English. I am unsure what level to use for writing. I am using "The Complete Writer" level 1 and have looked at the samples of the other levels. Level four seemed to advance so not sure if I should go to level three or not or consider another curriculum? Both children are avid readers and read on average about 1-2 hours a day. He struggles with too much writing as it tires him quite quickly. Id love any other advice regarding moving to classical education. I loved reading every page of the book " TWTM" It gave me all I needed and hoped for but I am struggling with putting it all together. It isn't as easy as 123 as I have come to realize. Any advice about transitioning to this way of teaching would be greatly appreciated. thank you kindly, Danielle
  6. I think there are some of us with kids who are taking Psychology this year. I've had my class watch easily 30 movies, all of them excellent as far as focusing on specific topics/issues, but for their final movie I discovered "Five Flights Up" (Diane Keaton, Morgan Freeman) and it is excellent! It highlights easily 10 Psych topics and is almost 100% clean. My students will have to view and analyze (briefly) the Psych topics they see/hear. Just wanted to share.
  7. perimenopause can cause brain fog. thyroid/adrenal can cause both brain fog and panic attacks. I think "estuation tube dysfunction" is a new pet term for the medical profession. I have a long and sordid history of sinus infections. today I went in - "you have estuation tube dysfunction. - here, go use Flonase. "will this take care of the horrible taste in the back of my mouth coming down from my sinuses? "oh, i don't know what's causing that - you don't have a sinus infection"...well, the ONLY times I've ever had this taste in my mouth - it was a sinus infection. I'll contact my ND tomorrow - she's far more helpful. last time I was on antibiotics - my (then) dr claimed I didn't have a sinus infection, and didn't need antibiotics. I knew I did... three months later, I had a kidney infection. (I had all the classic symptoms - including a temp of 102.8 ( I didn't even hit 101 with pneumonia, for which I was hospitalized.) but "your urine is clear". I had back pain, the dr didn't believe me and hit me right in the kidney. WHAT PART OF I HAVE BACK PAIN DIDN'T YOU UNDERSTAND!?!?!?? so, he put me on a strong antibiotic for a kidney infection... my sinuses immediately started draining like crazy with thick green/brown gunk, ... for days... (I said I had a sinus infection...)
  8. frankly - considering there are "rescues" who shell for puppy mills (and other questionable sources), you need to beware on that front too. when looking for a dog for dd, we started out with rescues. there were a few where the creep-o-meter just screamed. and as for the humane society - around here, that's 90% a pitbull or a chihuahua. she went to a reputable breeder, including genetic testing and warranties. these are also one of the smaller breeds I could own. (I like GSDs.) my mom had a Papillion purchased as an adult from a local breeder - she was a smart little thing. she was a former show dog - well trained and great on a leash. we think someone in her past may have kicked/stepped-on her - as she would never come to us a for a treat if we were standing. as soon as we sat down, she was there. I helped mom pick an appropriate temperament (re: very calm), and she still watched everything going on around her. she was great with dudeling even in the toddler stage when he was deathly afraid of dogs. she helped him calm down around dogs, and learn to do "gentle" pets. ( he tolerates 1dd's med Australian labradoodle (recognized breed in Australia, with organizations in the US pushing for akc recognition)- he's very active.)
  9. Right. Sorry I'm not being clear in what I was trying to say. She said he was done eating and she was not, but he was refusing to help with _insert basic dinner task at a family meal_. That was my point. I couldn't imagine a grown person saying no to something like that. It seems like it would just be so awkward.
  10. Consent isn't intrinsically about contracts or even about sex. Teaching our kids that they can say 'no' to a hug or 'stop' to tickling is basic consent education, and neither of those has anything to do with either contracts or sex. Centering consent isn't the problem I think you are trying to name. Where consent and 'sex work' intersect is when 'sex work' is evaluated based solely on whether the 'workers' are participating voluntarily. (Leaving aside questions of how free that consent might be.). We can center consent and still bring in other important factors by which we can evaluate the individual and societal impact of specific sexual choices.
  11. Today I rushed through the last few chapters of Love of Country: A Journey Through the Hebrides as it is due back at the library tomorrow. What an exceptional book! Part travelogue, part political and cultural history always tied in with modern politics and realities. Great writing, too. I wish good photographs weren't so expensive to print -- the black and white photos in this volume are barely helpful. But thanks to google I've been virtually traveling the islands and filling in all the huge gaps in my knowledge of Scottish history. The author made a point of visiting the mills and the individual weavers on Lewis who make Harris Tweed. I had no idea it is still created by hand and created on just a handful of islands in the outer Hebrides. She visits a retired dentist who took up weaving with his uncle's old loom, housed in a shed, which is powered only by his pedaling! "As he wove and his feet pedaled, one hand checked the shuttle while the other smoothed and felt the cloth for imperfections." The final paragraph in this chapter My other reading this week was a repeat, but this time an audio version of a print book. I adore the Rivers of London series -- part police procedural, part urban fantasy, all written with a very funny yet understated satirical snark. I listened to the first one, which has the American title Midnight Riot. I loved the narrator so much I figured I should just get the most recent title, Lies Sleeping, in audio, too.
  12. I don't know how old the OP's kids are, but at any rate, if I have to get up and get something I'll only do it if I'm the best person for that job. Which I might not be! If I'm still eating and some other capable adult is done, they should get the cup of water if the kid can't.
  13. I've been aware of these folks for a while. I wouldn't say I've made any sort of in-depth study of them - they're nauseating, so no! - but while I think you've got the crux of it, their root issue is deeper. These guys might talk about their pathetic lack of sex life (their words, not mine) but what really gets their goat is that women have any rights at all. (Also minorities, gays, LGBT folks - they're equal opportunity haters.) They do think they're owed sex - they also think they're owed media that only represents exactly them, jobs, prestige, money, power, cultural domination....
  14. I just finishedThe Stars Down Under: Sandra McDonald. It was different from the first book in the series but proved to be an intriguing story. I'll have to see if I can get the third book through inter-library loan. "Chief Terry Myell and Lieutenant Commander Jodenny Scott are in that most precarious of military situations, a mixed marriage. Enlisted and officer. It’s unnatural. Terry and Jodenny have been assigned to duty on the planet Fortune, away from the huge ships that carry colonists from the wreckage of polluted Earth to clean new worlds across the galaxy. But there’s another way besides spaceships to travel from world to world. A group within Team Space is exploring the Wondjina Spheres, a set of ancient alien artifacts that link places and times. Now those spheres have shut down and Team Space thinks that Terry and Jodenny are part of the key to make them work again —no matter how the two of them feel about it. They can volunteer, or be “volunteered.” What the researchers can’t anticipate is that the status quo, in which Team Space holds the monopoly on travel between worlds, is about to change. And as a result, Terry and Jodenny will be tested to their limits and beyond…" ** Yesterday I finished author Marie Force's first historical romance. While I enjoy the author's contemporary romantic suspense Fatal series, I'll admit that I found this book less satisfying. (Adult content) Duchess by Deception (Gilded Book 1)by Marie Force "Derek Eagan, the dashing Duke of Westwood, is well aware of his looming deadline. But weary of tiresome debutantes, he seeks a respite at his country home in Essex—and encounters a man digging on his property. Except he’s not a man. He’s a very lovely woman. Who suddenly faints at his feet. Catherine McCabe’s disdain for the aristocracy has already led her to flee an arranged marriage with a boorish Viscount. The last thing she wants is to be waylaid in a Duke’s home. Yet, she is compelled to stay by the handsome, thoughtful man who introduces himself as the Duke’s estate manager. Derek realizes two things immediately: he is captivated by her delicate beauty, and to figure out what she was up to, Catherine must not know he is the Duke. But as they fall passionately in love, Derek’s lie spins out of control. Will their bond survive his deception, not to mention the scorned Viscount’s pursuit? Most important, can Catherine fall in love all over again—this time with the Duke? " ** I also read an enjoyable short story. It can be purchased independently here A Dead Djinn in Cairo by P. Djèlí Clark or it is available for FREE as part of this large collection Some of the Best from 2016: A Original "Egypt, 1912. In an alternate Cairo infused with the otherworldly, the Ministry of Alchemy, Enchantments and Supernatural Entities investigate disturbances between the mortal and the (possibly) divine. What starts off as an odd suicide case for Special Investigator Fatma el-Sha’arawi leads her through the city’s underbelly as she encounters rampaging ghouls, saucy assassins, clockwork angels, and plot that could unravel time itself." Regards, Kareni
  15. Back up - you haven't answered my question, Bluegoat. Simply stating "Consent is based on a contract notion of sex" neither answers my question nor actually explains your position.
  16. The cat is a miscreant. She was eating the lemon bars.
  17. I love my KA handmixer! I've had it for ten years and it's a real workhorse. The beaters are thin and have a unique shape that helps mix things very well, and they are much easier to clean than others I've had.
  18. Today
  19. Interesting but not particularly useful when discussing a potential recession, particularly as it was written before the yield curve inversion on Friday and the latest manufacturing numbers. It also focuses on stock market returns, which are nice so far in 2019 but still has down around 5% from October. Monday is going to be a shaky day for the markets based on current futures action and the performance of Asian markets today. Another correction in the next few months is not out of the question. A lot will depend on trade deals and the next round of economic reports.
  20. I read it last year and also enjoyed it. Welcome back! Regards, Kareni
  21. Fwiw, if you want it to be a long-term change, you might try making *small* changes and chain them to routines so they feel natural and happen more automatically. If you make just one change a month this way, you'll have 12 changes in a year that will actually be durable and feel good. And that will also give you the chance to work out the kinks with each change. I would start with beds, because everyone gets out of bed at some point. I have a pet peeve about drawers open, so that could be a different month. I got a roomba so it's now easy to enforce a "once a week we pick up the floor so the roomba can run" routine. But each change is tied to routine so it occurs very naturally at its time. You may find you need to buy tools to make things happen. Like for keeping baths tidy, you can install paper towel holders. I think you're unlikely to get things as neat as you'd like them, just because you are home all day doing things. Decluttering goes a long way and makes it easier to put things away. That's usually the real trouble. And if things can't be put away, you can rotate them out so there's less. But even that, I wouldn't worry about. Just make one small change a month but make it real and solid, something that will stick.
  22. Wow, the amounts she's talking about there are extremely high. I'd have to research it a lot before taking anything up so high, mercy.
  23. March Madness continues! Ds18 and I have followed the tournament yearly; this is the first year that we entered official brackets on ESPN. (You have to be 18+, so I waited until he was old enough to officially do his own.) On several of my brackets I predicted 14 out of the 16 teams to make it to the Sweet Sixteen round.
  24. I'm glad you've agreed on a path! You have the evals in 2 weeks, right? So do you basically just have 1-2 weeks now to take care of? How do your kids respond to projects? Like if you said hey we're gonna deep clean the house (which gives you a way to make demands but also lets them off the hook for school work) how would they respond? That kind of break is restorative for me because it also gets the house back in order.
  25. J-rap


    Hello, I'm finally coming back to respond more! -- Sorry it has taken me so long! We had an Australian shepherd that we got from a sweet family. They raised both the mom and dad and it was a litter of around 6. This was on a farm with lots of animals and lots of young kids, so pups were exposed to a lot of things from day 1. The family made sure to hold the pups and walk them and get them used to lots of things. When we went out there for the first time, our pup was the only one left. He was probably 10 weeks old or so. He was a little shy, but super sweet. We took him home and we gently exposed him to our entire family of 9. He warmed up to everyone quickly and never showed any signs of aggression. He let our kids roll around on the ground with him, hugging him, smothering him with kisses... He never minded it. We were all together during those early weeks with him, took him everywhere, gave him lots of love and attention, and he was a great little pup! He was quite shy in new settings but as long as he was with even just one of us, he was fine. Nothing stood out as unusual. He met new people regularly and was fine with them, although he'd tend to stay very close to a family member. I was with him almost 100% of the time myself, at least in the background. He never had any bad experiences with people treating him harshly, or scaring him. Then one day, at maybe 4 months, a new friend came over who reached out and pet our little Aussie (just like several other friends had before), and our pup reacted absolutely bizarrely, like he was a different dog. And this was just a 4 month old pup! He snarled and let out a growl that seemed really freakish for a young pup, and then lunged at the friend and tried to bite him. It was really strange (the friend was a very kind and gentle guy, too). We had already started him in puppy classes so he'd be exposed to other dogs, had taken him to lots of places to socialize him, so this was really unusual. Then a few weeks later, we were at a park having a picnic and he was on a long rope. He seemed very content and playful as we all sat around. A young woman happened to pass, and she smiled and waved at us and then slowly walked past us although didn't approach us. Our pup suddenly completely freaked out... the change was instant and drastic. He tore at her in a split second, broke free of his rope, and attacked her. He actually ripped a big chunk of her dress right off of her. He was less than half a year old! This behavior seemed very unusual and scary, and I was starting to become very unsettled by it. I forgot to mention that we had gone back to the family farm where we had gotten him a few times (just to visit), and he was fine. But after this behavior began, the very next time I brought him there, he attacked one of their chickens out of the blue and killed it. (During the other visits he didn't mind the chickens at all.) The next time I visited the farm, he ferociously attacked the UPS man. I began taking him to an animal behaviorist in our area. We live in a small rural community and don't have a lot of options, but I wanted to try everything I could. I also went up and down our neighborhood and gave our neighbors treats to give him whenever they passed so that he'd always associate people with positive things. I even did that with our mailman! I'd take him on walks, and whenever I was even close to another person and he was quiet and seemed relaxed, I gave him a treat to reinforce that association. Anyway, I worked on many different things with the behaviorist. We were gentle yet firm, doing everything the behaviorist told us. We exercised him a lot, often several times each day. My dh has a limp due to a disability, and he walks down the stairs slowly. (We live in a two-story house.) One day, my dh was slowly walking down the stairs, and I noticed our dog, on the first floor looking up at the stairs, getting a kind of glazed look in his eyes. He was looking at my dh differently, and appeared almost ready to attack him. It was very scary. He didn't attack him, but he had a very different look in his eyes that frightened me. My dh is a gentle person, and had only treated our pup lovingly. Never a harsh word or touch, only a kind, always-positive trainer. Up until this time, our pup seemed quite attached to him. From then on though, whenever my dh first walked down the stairs in the morning, our pup got that strange look, and I could hear a low growl which was new. He began to stare hard with a scary look in his eyes at my dh as he walked down the stairs, and I knew I couldn't trust him anymore. I had to restrict him more and more, and never let him out of my site. About a month later, a dear friend happened to walk into our house unannounced. I had been keeping a very close eye on our Aussie at all times, always by my side, or keeping him in the kitchen if he was in the house and I had to be somewhere else. On that particular day, I had just let him inside from the backyard and hadn't yet closed the doors of the kitchen. He heard the friend walk into the front hall, and before I could do anything, he threw himself at our friend, attacking him with all his might. He was very violent, like a mad-dog. Completely out of control He tore at his leg and ripped his pants. It was horrible. He attached himself to his thigh, and bit hard, drawing blood. It all happened so fast, the only way I could stop him was to throw myself on him. Our pup had never minded family members taking his food, or taking away a toy, etc. He didn't mind being on a leash, being in the car with us, etc. It wasn't about him being possessive. For him, it was simply like a new "fear awareness" had suddenly settled in -- with strangers, unusual movements (my dh limping), other animals, etc. This was all before he was even a year old. We had owned many dogs previously, and had never experienced this before. I probably didn't need all of these examples and sorry this has gotten long! But I wanted to give you a clear idea of the progression. In the end, we weren't able to keep the dog. If it had been strangers only, I maybe would have tried to work with him a little longer. But I'd become paranoid that he would attack my dh. So this is what I wanted to tell you: I did a lot of research and learned that Aussies in particular will now and then have a weird freakish recessive gene in them. Aussies (and I assume most cattle dogs) are bred to act on instinct. So, they don't take the time to hesitate and then decide; they just act. Most of the time this is just what they should be doing. But if they have this weird recessive aggression gene in them, it causes them to act ferociously so quickly, that it gives you no absolutely no time to act. It gives THEM no time to hesitate. It's like, as Mercy said, a screw was loose. It appeared to be completely uncontrollable. It's a freakish aggression that results from shyness. I spoke to the farm family about this (where he was from), and they were trying to figure it out as well. This had been their first litter, so they were nervous about having more now. They said they believed that the reason he was adopted out last was because he was the shy one. The other pups in the litter hadn't been shy at all, and they were all growing up fine. It was just our shy pup who was acting violently. Anyway, I know this doesn't sound very encouraging. But, I wanted to let you know that if it continues, it's not because of anything you did or didn't do... You can beat yourself up about trying to figure out what you did wrong, but try not to. If it does continue, it's most likely something like this recessive gene that is just in them, and because cattle dogs act extremely quickly and instinctively, you don't have even a second to step in and re-direct them. I likened it to a mental illness in a human, where it's genetically in them latent and then in teens or 20's it just kicks in. We didn't raise this pup any differently than all of our others, and felt we did everything we could to help him. My heart absolutely broke for this pup, because I know he couldn't help it at all. It just seemed to take control over him. It took me a long, long time to get over it. I just loved that little guy. If our situation had been different, I maybe would have continued trying... Other people have suggested ideas here and I'd certainly try them. Medication to help calm them is an interesting idea. I couldn't find anyone in our area who could or was willing to work with him anymore, and given my dh's disability and other things, I didn't feel I could take any more chances. I've never for one minute blamed our sweet Aussie for being the way he was. I know he couldn't help it. I don't want to discourage you at all, and I think there are a lot of things you can try still. But I wanted to pass on what I had learned about this gene that some Aussies have. I've read about it in several places, and it's a real thing. You take care... I know how difficult this is. Very best of luck to you!!
  26. Dropped off the van and picked up the rental car. I got upgraded to a hybrid, so that's cool. Here's hoping everything else goes smoothly.
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