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In light of recent campus violence what are some questions you pose


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when deciding on campus housing?

 

I've been thinking (OK, fretting:o) over this for a while now. My son will go off to school and is required to live in the dorms. So I wonder what the schools do in order to screen out potential problem students who might just end up being my son's roommate(s)? They obviously cannot divulge the medical history of one student to another (if they even know it themselves)...but I'm finding that I want a complete history - both medical and social on any potential roommates! Both dh and I are medical professionals which may make me more paranoid in that we see the failures of the medications/psychoanalysis all too often.

 

The number of medicated college students is far greater today than it was when I was in college. So is the use of illegal substance abuse. Recent studies are showing a link between antidepressant use and suicide as well as violence.

 

My son's exposure to troubled youth has been limited. His friends lives are very similar to his own - so how do I teach him to look for signs of trouble?

 

I was at the University of Iowa when a foreign graduate student wiped out our physics department because he didn't win an award. And now with all the campus violence in the news it makes one a little worried.

 

So what are *you* doing to ensure your students' safety? And what advice can you give me?

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These incidents are anomalies. Think of all the hundreds of thousands of students who live college campuses without incident. I'm not going to worry about it.

 

My 17 yo has lived in a high school dormitory for almost two years at NC School of the Arts. In my opinion, highly creative people are some of the kookiest around. He's had no problems. My husband had a roommate in grad school who was a visual artist and "very strange," but they got along ok. A lot of roommate situations are civil co-existence.

 

Next year, we're planning to reserve a single room on campus for our son-- primarily because he's done the roommate gig for two years and feels like he needs his own space to work.

 

My nieces go to a large university and their dad rents an apartment for them. That's an option, if you fear the dorm situation. They found a place within walking distance of campus.

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First I would pray. Then I would simply be wise about what university my child went to and made sure that the dorm he stays in was a secured one. Many dorms on campuses have policies where only the ones living in the dorm can go inside.

 

As for the shootings, well your dc is probably more likely to get hit by a car than to be shot in a classroom. I guess if it really bothers you then talk through scenerios with your dc. Have them come up with some sort of plan as to what they would do. I have a book by a former FBI investigator, and he made some comment that you don't just stand there and let someone shoot at you. It is better to turn and run, and when you run don't run in a straight line. It is very difficult for someone to shoot at a moving target (I guess a professional soldier or trained individual could do it, but not your man on the street).

 

Simply ask the Lord for wisdom and use the wisdom He has given you. You can do criminal checks of campuses by going to the local police station or doing an internet search. I'm assuming you can question a campus administrator about their policies for shutting a campus down when someone goes bezerk. I personally would be more worried about my dc's roomate in the dorm. I guess if your dc goes to a big secular university then the dc probably doesn't have a choice for a roomate, but you could look into it. If it is such a big concern, then forego the big university. I've chosen the local community college which just so happens to be a part of a university chain to send my ds to school. He doesn't have to worry about the rommate problem for now.

 

FWIW,

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I don't really know how to answer this, as it is something I, too, am thinking through right now. I think that the very small, private mid-west colleges I've already been thinking of look better and better to me. I think that schools closer at hand as opposed to far away look better and better to me. I think that maybe I won't even throw a fit if he ends up insisting on the local university (as that will mean he'll live at home), although how I'll manage to direct him into small classes as opposed to the mega-lectures I don't know.....

 

I think that I will be talking to him at length about personal safety, and maybe even trying to engage a safety officer from our police force or other safety professional to talk to him and others about how to stay safe at school. I think it would help tremendously just to be cognizant of having a plan in case of an emergency.

 

I'm thinking that the young man at VA Tech wasn't under treatment and did not have a history of treatment - or not much of one. Although everyone in his life, at school, home, etc. knew full well that there was a problem, basically nothing had been done to address that problem. How do you handle undiagnosed people? There's no paper trail to follow there, or not enough of one to indicate pending danger.... So I'm not sure that even requiring medical histories would help....

 

This case reminded me of many, many of the high school shootings. After it happened, people started coming out of the woodwork saying that they "knew he had a problem". Similarly, with many of the school shootings, folks would say that the kid(s) who did it had been saying things which lead them to believe that something was going to happen, sometimes something very specific.

 

Okay, so if these types of warning behaviours are occurring, WHY isn't ANYONE taking the responsibility to report them, document them, and DO SOMETHING about them? I think that accountability, on the part of EVERYONE, needs to start occurring more often and that this would greatly aid in reducing these sorts of incidents. Virtually no man is an island (even though this poor Va Tech kid seemed to me to come closest to that as I've ever heard). If you live in the world, there are going to be people who observe your behaviours. If you exhibit bizarre behaviours on a regular basis, those seeing them should be reporting them and there should be a log kept of them. There should be folks appointed to review these things and determine whether action might be needed.

 

Schools should be able to require counseling and treatment, or suspension of those who are too mentally ill to attend. I know full well that I'm getting into transgression of various freedoms here, but public shootings, wherever they occur are becoming a public safety matter - and I'm afraid that I believe that public safety for the masses must sometimes trump personal, individual freedoms for the greater good.

 

Folks can't just walk around ignoring those with obviously bizarre behaviours and then act surprised when something more sinister finally occurs. EVERYONE is responsible for everyone else who comes within the realm of their windshield wipers every day. If I see something wrong occurring and I don't speak up or act to correct it, then I HAVE DONE WRONG, as much as anyone else involved. The world and everyone in it absolutely are MY responsibility, as far as I'm concerned. This bit people spout about "none of my business" to absolve themselves of responsibility in life is hateful to me.

 

We are put here to LOVE each other, whether we know each other or not. Whether the 'lovee' is poor, hateful, full of hate, or seemingly unresponsive to our love is beside the point. If any one person in the world had taken the time to love that poor Va Tech student and see to it that he got removed from school and got the help he needed, then all those other precious lives would have been saved, too. We are all interconnected. When we let one poor soul slide into the abyss, chances are they are going to take someone else with them when they go..... And we can't all sit around wringing our hands and saying, "I don't really know them", "What can *I* do, they're a stranger to me", "It's not really any of *my* business" - until it's too late for anyone to do anything.....

 

I speak to my older son on a regular basis about taking care with those he encounters on a daily basis at school. He does not know what sort of background they come from. He does not know what sort of events may drive their actions. I especially encourage him NOT to join in where there is a person who is constantly being teased, but to make it his job to say a kind word to that person, instead. I encourage him to see the person who is always left out or picked on and try to lift them up in some way. Human beings simply can not take the stresses of being abused over a long period of time, and kids too often don't recognize that ganging up to tease, etc. does amount to abuse after a while. Even a little light at the end of the tunnel can make a difference for someone on any particular day.

 

My son is by no means perfect and brimming over with kindness, but I have observed him many times, myself, dropping a word of encouragement here and there that might make the difference in someone else's life. And we can all do that - everyday. It's the simplest thing in the world - and the most difficult. It's the Golden Rule. It's embraced by every major religion and philosophy of living in the world. It's the key to the kingdom right here on earth. And it's hanging right in front of our noses..... When we all become accountable for each other, I believe that the world will be different. And we won't have quite so many of these sorts of worries. Our society is clearly out of balance. It is up to us, as individuals, to help right that balance again, rather than waiting for someone else to do it all for us.

 

So that's where I am in my musings on this thing. Sorry to be so long and rambly, but that's my process for thinking through these sorts of complicated things.....

 

Regena

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For this reason:

 

I was at the University of Iowa when a foreign graduate student wiped out our physics department because he didn't win an award.

 

dorms don't seem to be the issue. Violence, when it happens, seems to take place in the most public places. Sadly, those instances really aren't preventable and are a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. As far as more personal, one-on-one violence, the colleges seem to go out of their way to prevent that at all the schools we've visited. At any rate, dorms are a lot safer than an apartment building.

 

I can understand why you'd be really jumpy given your experience. I think I would be too in the same situation.

 

Barb

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Does your son know anyone else who is going to that school? If he does and he gets along with him, they could probably request being roommates.

 

The college that my ds attends had a form online with some basic questions. Then they listed all the incoming freshmen (250) and it could match up people. He could then contact them and they could decide if they were a match. He ended up with someone he met at orientation at the beginning of summer. They are still roommates this year and will be next year too. Is there an orientation before they pick roommates?

 

In his dorm, the only way to use the elevator or the stairwell is to have an ID. They are locked otherwise - all the time. The front desk is also very vigilant about visitors. You have to leave a picture ID, even the parents have to leave one.

 

There was a boy who went to ds's school last year. He was asked to not come back for academic reasons. This past summer, he was charged with murder because he gave a girl prescription drugs and she ODed.

 

I would check the crime rate for the school. It should be readily available. At ds's school, there has not been one incident in 5 years of anything. That incident was credit card theft.

 

That said, random acts will still be random, you can't prevent what you can't control.

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Schools should be able to require counseling and treatment, or suspension of those who are too mentally ill to attend. I know full well that I'm getting into transgression of various freedoms here, but public shootings, wherever they occur are becoming a public safety matter - and I'm afraid that I believe that public safety for the masses must sometimes trump personal, individual freedoms for the greater good.

 

 

Regena

 

 

Their hands are so tied by the government that they can't do so many things. They can't require counseling; they can't recommend counseling unless a student comes to them with a problem. This means a professor can say I think there is a problem, a dean can hear that, talk to someone in the counseling dept, but counselor cannot approach the student.

 

They can't give you information about your child's roommate. They can't give you info about YOUR child (if over 18) unless your child has signed permission for that. They can't call and tell you your child is in the hospital or having trouble or failing classes.

 

This is why we had a discussion a few months ago here about making your student sign a permission slip allowing you access to this information BEFORE you handed over the money for classes.

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I agree! This is hugely problematic. I think that not only should regulations be changed to allow/require parental involvement and briefings (seems like it would be simple, via internet), but that public health measures should be passed which would allow counselors to require that those deemed unsafe be removed from a campus situation until they could receive appropriate treatment.

 

I seem to recall that in the Va Tech case, some professors *had* made notification, and I think the young man was even receiving some counseling, but it was way too little and way too late. I know that it was all they were allowed to do under current law. I think current law needs to be changed.

 

Regena

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What is interesting to me about the VA tech thing is what stopped him was another student with a gun. This was never reported in mainstream media!

 

According to Wiki (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginia_Tech_massacre) and CNN (http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2007/virginiatech.shootings/), the shooter shot himself. I haven't read anything that says he encountered anyone else with a gun. Where did you hear that?

 

I remember hearing that there'd been a shooting there before, so maybe you're referring to different event?

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There is a very conservative newspaper called "Wistleblower" that had the interview with the person holding the gun. I don't think I still have that issue, but it was in the last year. There was a specific reason he had a gun, I just can't remember why. I will try to find out the month the article was listed in for you.

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According to Wiki (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginia_Tech_massacre) and CNN (http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2007/virginiatech.shootings/), the shooter shot himself. I haven't read anything that says he encountered anyone else with a gun. Where did you hear that?

 

 

I remember hearing that there'd been a shooting there before, so maybe you're referring to different event?

 

After reading the article again, I think you may be right. Ummm...oops!:o

 

I guess I should preread my proof before posting.

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