Giving random people money

[hjffkj]

Have you ever done this or had this done for you? Twice in the last week I've had complete strangers just give us random amounts of money.

 

Last Monday, all 7 of us were in the self check out lane at Walmart. I was ringing up our 3 items when an older woman just g abs my hand and slides money into it while saying, " Take your family out to lunch on me." When I got to the car I checked and she had handed me $40.

 

Today at Mass, the woman behind us gave dd a twenty and told her to share it with the rest of her siblings. After Mass, she told my dh how well behaved our children were.

 

Obviously, I'm so thankful for their gifts but it has me curious. Who has had similar things happen to them? Have you done it yourself? What motivated you to if you have?

 

I've given gift cards for local restaurants to homeless people before but would never think to just give a complete stranger random money. Anyway just curious about other people's experiences.

[Guinevere]

I've had it happen to me. I've never done it to someone else by just handing over cash in the store, but I have paid for other people's meals anonymously, and I always keep the pay it ahead thing going if I find myself in one at a drive thru. I've never started it, though.

[Catwoman]

Random people just handed you money?

 

If someone did that to me, I would wonder if I looked like I was homeless or something.

 

I'm not saying that's what they would have been thinking -- I just mean I would have been so shocked by the gesture and wondered why they picked my family. It's so sweet of those people to have done that for you, though!

[Frances]

My husband, young son, and I were once eating together at a restaurant. An older man came up to us and said he so enjoyed hearing our son talk that he had paid for our meal.

 

I've given cash and snacks to homeless people, but never cash to random people.

[Guinevere]

Random people just handed you money?

 

If someone did that to me, I would wonder if I looked like I was homeless or something.

 

I'm not saying that's what they would have been thinking -- I just mean I would have been so shocked by the gesture and wondered why they picked my family. It's so sweet of those people to have done that for you, though!

One time, a man was really enjoying watching my kids as we worked our way through the store. He made him nostalgic for his youth, and for his own children. So, he wanted to do something to make these children right in front of him smile and share his happy memories. It was a really sweet moment.

[eternalsummer]

I give homeless people money (generally men, both because there are more of them and because women by virtue of their gender seem to get a lot more donations, from my anecdotal watching the traffic in front of me experience).  A lady bought my iced tea at the Starbucks a couple of weeks ago :)

[kroe1]

Yes, as a pay-it-forward line at Wendy’s. $20!

[Xahm]

When my oldest was about ten months old, she must have been adorable, because that was when people kept giving her money and other presents. It was pretty weird, but the denominations were small. By "kept happening" I'd say it happened about for times in a couple months. Never happened before our again, though.

[DawnM]

I have to admit, I would feel very uncomfortable if someone paid for my meal or gave me money.  It might just be me, but it would be awkward.  

 

Once we ate at a restaurant having one of those specials where you get one appetizer to share, two entrees, and one dessert to share.  The table next to us said they didn't want their desert and since we had 3 teen boys with  us, they wondered if we would want it.  That wasn't quite so awkward since they would have to pay for it in the deal anyway, even if they didn't eat it.

 

But no, I haven't been offered money.

[marbel]

Once when I was buying coffee and a breakfast sandwich in a convenience store the man ahead of me bought it.  Or maybe it was the guy in line behind me. It was such a confusing moment I don't remember.  He did say he enjoyed the look on my face, and I thanked him, so at least I didn't appear ungracious about it.

 

A few weeks later in the same store I was going to buy for the kid in front of me; he looked like a college student.  But then I realized he was just buying cigarettes and I didn't do it.  

 

Honestly, I know I'm going to get slammed as an idiot for this, but I don't get how to do it without making a fuss.  I was so preoccupied (in a hurry, running late) when it was done for me, I don't even know how the "logistics" of it worked. 

 

I do give money sometimes to homeless people.  My daughter has been talking about taking small bags with a couple dollars, a protein bar, and gloves and/or socks to give people next time she goes downtown.   We see a lot of folks near and in the train stations.

Edited December 11, 2017 by marbel

[alisoncooks]

I've had my coffee paid for at Starbucks before (drive through, car in front of me). But I've never had someone just slip me some cash (except my dad, whenever we see him). I'll admit, I'd feel uncomfortable if a stranger did it (I feel slightly uncomfortable when my dad does it).

[Wheres Toto]

Last week I did it accidentally when I forgot to grab my $20 cash back at the self-serve register at Walmart.   :tongue_smilie:  The cash is dispensed below the register and when it said "don't forget your change" all I thought was "I used a debit card, I don't have any change".  I was in the car driving by the time I remembered .

 

I tried to imagine that someone who really needed it found it and that it brightened up their holidays.  It made me feel better about being so dumb.

[Prairie~Phlox]

We know of a gentleman at church that was anonymously just gifted $800 to get his car fixed.  There's been other instances like that before and I don't have a problem with it, we never have a lot of extra to do it, and haven't had anyone that I remember do it for us.  We rarely ever go through the drive through or Starbucks and don't go inside at the gas station.  I have found money in the dispenser at self check out before, but it's harder to forget these days, as it's set up differently and is easier to see.

[Junie]

OP, I'm guessing that the people in the two situations you mentioned were in the giving spirit because of the holidays and your family is an "easy target" (not the right phrasing, but it's morning) because you have quite a few children.

 

Sometimes people give gifts to strangers around the holidays; your family might have reminded them of their own growing up.

 

My mom is a giver and was often giving groceries or other items to families in our church.

 

I once paid for a LEO's dinner in the drive-thru.  He was in a police car several cars behind me.  And the year my grandfather died I adopted a senior from the Angel Tree.

[porque]

Happened to me once. I think it was 10 or 15 dollars. It was much appreciated at the time!

[TheReader]

When I was a very young mom, and looked much younger than I was, I had the person behind me in line pay for my meager groceries one day. The groceries included special formula for my oldest son, who was a baby (and I'm sure I had him with me, most likely) and a handful of other things, and although we had WIC for the formula this person insisted. WIC only provided x number of cans of formula a month, and usually we had to buy one or two extra (and he was on a special one that was ~double the cost of normal formula), so this gift meant I could later use our WIC formula coupons to buy extras. It was incredible, much needed, and greatly appreciated.

 

Ever since, I've just sort of kept an eye & ear out, and if I see a similar situation where it looks like I could be  a help, I'll offer to pay, or give a gift card to that store, or what have you. I've never just randomly handed someone cash for no reason, though I've had that done, too. Once in college someone mailed a check, through my church so I received it anonymously, for $25. Another time, out to breakfast with a friend, someone else paid our bill. 

 

I guess for me, the motivation is kind of a "Pay it Forward" thing, now that we're able to do so. People did for me, now I am able to do for other people. These kinds of kindnesses help make the world a better place, reminding folks that everyone's just folks, that there is good in the world, there is hope out there. Maybe that's sentimental or idealistic, but it's kind of like the starfish story....I can't make a difference on a grand scale, but I can make a world of difference to that one person. 

 

 

[rjand6more]

I have a friend who goes to the grocery store and spies on people to see who she can bestow $20 to.  How can you even tell?  I've asked her.  She looks at the kids' shoes and clothes.  She looks at the types of foods they have in their cart.  She looks to see what kind of electronics, etc. they have.  That just seems icky to me.(and maybe a bit judgmental and presumptive...)

 

I must be in a bad mood.  Sorry.  It can be a sweet thing.  And an older person would probably make me cry. LOL I have not had grandparents for 25 years.

[hjffkj]

I have a friend who goes to the grocery store and spies on people to see who she can bestow $20 to. How can you even tell? I've asked her. She looks at the kids' shoes and clothes. She looks at the types of foods they have in their cart. She looks to see what kind of electronics, etc. they have. That just seems icky to me.(and maybe a bit judgmental and presumptive...)

 

I must be in a bad mood. Sorry. It can be a sweet thing. And an older person would probably make me cry. LOL I have not had grandparents for 25 years.

That's gross. I can't imagine that was the reason these woman did it for us. While we do have a low income and tight budget you wouldn't know it from the outside.

 

My guess is they enjoyed watching the kids and wanted to do something nice

Edited December 11, 2017 by hjffkj

[hjffkj]

I have to admit, I would feel very uncomfortable if someone paid for my meal or gave me money. It might just be me, but it would be awkward.

 

Once we ate at a restaurant having one of those specials where you get one appetizer to share, two entrees, and one dessert to share. The table next to us said they didn't want their desert and since we had 3 teen boys with us, they wondered if we would want it. That wasn't quite so awkward since they would have to pay for it in the deal anyway, even if they didn't eat it.

 

But no, I haven't been offered money.

I have never felt awkward about it, just very grateful.

[ksr5377]

About a year ago I was grocery shopping without an children. We're a family of  6 and I don't like to go grocery shopping, so I usually do 2-3 big stock-up trips a month and DH will stop once a week for the bread/milk/produce.  Needless to say, my cart was close to overflowing.  There was an older man in front of me in line and after he payed for his groceries and turned around and gave me $20, because I must need it more than him.  I was somewhat embarrassed but also thankful, it was a very sweet gesture.

[mom@shiloh]

We moved to the eastern part of the country 7 years ago, and it has happened to me three times since we moved!!  After the second time, I admit that I looked down to see what I was wearing and try to figure out why someone thought I needed money.  

 

The first time happened in WalMart the day before Thanksgiving.  I was a bit discouraged since we were living in a new place and none of our older children were coming home for Thanksgiving.  An older man with broken glasses, stopped me in the aisle, handed me some cash and told me that God had told him to give it to me.  I looked down and started to cry. I looked up again in just a few seconds, walked around the store to try to find him and thank him, but he was gone.  It was very touching to me.  I felt that God had spoken to me to let me know that He saw me.  

 

The second time, we were shopping at Salvation Army.  A woman was impressed with my children and handed me cash, saying that she felt strongly led to give it to me.  I protested -- we really didn't need the money -- but she said she had to do it.

 

The third time, we were eating in a restaurant with our five youngest and a man at a nearby table paid for our meal.  The waitress told us after he left and she said that he did that type of thing more often.

 

Our youngest kids were adopted, are all non-white and all have physical special needs.  The first man didn't know that because I was alone at WalMart, but for the second and third times, my thought is that it was those people's way of supporting special need adoption.  Each time it was an encouragement to me.  It wasn't the money that was important to me.  It was that someone wanted to reach out to strangers to bless and encourage us.  

[3 ladybugs]

My father is a computer repair man that picks up your computer and works on it and returns it. He is constantly in the car. He has for years handed out $1 bills to homeless people he sees on the street. He has no problems with this and just does it. For years, he used to also buy cigarettes and sometimes snacks for a random lady who was home bound who just happened to need computer assistance one day. She commented on how she could never get the people that helped her with food, to get her cigarettes. So he did every week for a few years. She eventually died. 

 

I grew up with this as a father. Makes my life look awful but there are those among us that are like this. They will always go the extra mile if needed. 

[hjffkj]

Reading all the replies reminded me that we've also had restaurant meals and groceries paid for. All by older people who have always commented how much well behaved and sweet the kids have been.

[mommyoffive]

I have a friend who goes to the grocery store and spies on people to see who she can bestow $20 to.  How can you even tell?  I've asked her.  She looks at the kids' shoes and clothes.  She looks at the types of foods they have in their cart.  She looks to see what kind of electronics, etc. they have.  That just seems icky to me.(and maybe a bit judgmental and presumptive...)

 

I must be in a bad mood.  Sorry.  It can be a sweet thing.  And an older person would probably make me cry. LOL I have not had grandparents for 25 years.

 

I don't think that is bad, although the electronics thing is hard to do.  

 

Not saying that it was why this person did it to you OP.  I think people do it for lots of reasons. 

 

I have had one person do it to me at the store when I was there with all kids.  She offered to buy my kids something.  I was so taken by surprise that I didn't let her do it.  

 

I think lots of people are just doing nice things for others right now.   How lucky you are to have that happen to you.  I think the dollar amount doesn't always matter unless at the time you need it.  But it is just something that makes you so happy when someone does something nice for you.  Even small like holding the door. 

It also makes you want to pass on good things to others so the chain keeps going. 

[mommyoffive]

Such sweet stories.  Keep them coming.  

 

Makes me want to go do something nice today. 

[rjand6more]

I have given coupons to people in grocery lines.  Especially diaper coupons. :)

[eternalsummer]

Once a lady bought DS9 (then 6 or so) a matchbox car at the checkout of a grocery store.  I almost never took him shopping at that age because he had no impulse control (and was a runner), and so of course at the checkout line he made a small fuss about buying a car.  I said no, we were just going to try to get through the checkout line, let's GO already, etc. A few minutes later a lady comes up and says, can I buy your son a little car?

 

Well, what was I going to say?  Of course I said yes, but I thought it was a bit weird - they cost literally $1.  The things in my cart were soy milk and organic frozen bread and other sundry fancy items; I doubt we looked all that poor, and $1 is not that much anyway.  So did she think I didn't have the money for it?  I guess so, because otherwise she's just suggesting that DS should get a car even though I preferred him not to get one.  I dunno.

[Tenaj]

Just a few weeks ago I was in a drive-through at McDonald's and was told that my order had been paid for.  I was flabbergasted and didn't even think to pass the blessing on to the next car.  I'll have to do that the next time I'm there.

[Jennifer132]

Someone slipped a note with$100 dollars in it into my purse during Mass once. Once some people gave us money when we were eating at a fast food place. They came up, complimented our kids and then gave us money. It seems to me we get a lot of positive attention due to our family size and the fact that the kids tend to behave in public. Once we took a friend to the emergency room and sat with her while she waited, then took her home. A few months later she sent us a note thanking us and there was some money in it.

 

We have done random stuff like that too. Once I put some money inside a book I had borrowed from a friend, then returned it to her. My husband once met a homeless man at Wendy's and paid for his lunch, then ate with him. Once at a burger place my husband was behind a military family who was trying to use a military discount. The store denied it (wrong day for a discount) so my husband bought them a gift card to that restaurant and thanked him for his service.

Edited December 11, 2017 by Jennifer132

[Granny_Weatherwax]

I have given cash but have never been on the receiving end. I like to pay it forward but have never been on the receiving end of that either.

 

 

[mommyoffive]

I just read this today

 

http://www.montanamoneyadventures.com/story-of-two-bears/

[catz]

Someone gave me a free coffee at a coffee shop yesterday!  That was nice.  No one has ever given us money.  Someone sent a free plate of desserts because they thought my son was so cute and hilarious at 2.  He was verbally precocious and when the waitress came over he said something like "Hi.  I'd like to talk to you about what kind of desserts you have here" before we ordered anything.  LOL.  I have received unexpected gifts at times. 

 

I don't usually hand out money but we pay it forward in many other ways.  We give quite a bit of money to vetted charities.  I am considering having a box of granola bars in my van for pan handlers on corners in the winter. 

[unsinkable]

A woman in line at walgreen's couldn't get her prescriptions bc she didn't have $3. I walked up and heard the end of the interaction, as she started to make a phone call and stepped out of line, very upset. She called someone and asked for $3, so I pulled a $10 out of my pocket and gave it to her as she was still on the phone.

 

She thanked me over and over but then continued the call and mentioned stuff about needing to be home for the social worker bc she was getting her kids back. And she didn't have time to run around, but she needed her medicine, etc...

 

My heart aches thinking of her.

[Garga]

We've helped friends with money difficulties a few times, but not strangers. One time it was annonymous. The family was going out on a limb with a new business venture and it had a rocky start, so I put some gift cards in their mailbox for them to buy presents for the kids.

 

 

We give out a few ones or socks and chapstick when I'm in Baltimore city to the homeless. I've never even thought of giving money to someone who was not begging for it. It's a nice thought, though. I like the idea of annoymously paying for someone's food at a restaurant. I wouldn't be comfortable walking up to a stranger and handing them money, but would be comfortable with paying for someone else on the way out of the restaurant.

 

A stranger has never given us money, but my in-laws like to give us money whenever they hear of us buying a big item, from a dishwasher to a car, and sometimes school curric. It is much appreciated.

Edited December 11, 2017 by Garga

[Dmmetler]

My teen mentee and I meet at McDonalds during DD’s class, and there are several regulars, mostly older gentlemen and a small group of adults with developmental delays who come in for free coffee and $.99 sausage biscuits on Mondays so for the last Monday before finals, the teen and I prepaid their usual orders and greatly enjoyed watching how surprised they were when the regular clerk told them it had already been paid :).

 

We’ve also stepped in and supplemented cash when people are short at a pharmacy or grocery store.

 

DD was once given a Christmas ornament she’d been looking at at Hobby Lobby-an older lady observed her doing so, bought it, and then gave it to DD after we’d gone through the cash register, saying that she didn’t have a grandchild around for Christmas to get a special ornament for, so could DD put this on her tree at home for her?

[momacacia]

Someone paid for our meal ahead of us in the drive through. Didn't bother me. I jsur honked and waves.

 

I have a FB person I follow who does this with her kids in the mall (merry Christmas, hand other person cash) every Christmas. I think it's a weird show of charity/giving, and I think it would more often than not make other people uncomfortable. Totally different than the needy/homeless person scenario. I really like this person otherwise, but find.this giving thing a little ostentatious. But, she's been on both sides of the financial fence so maybe it means something different to her than to me.

[hjffkj]

 

A stranger has never given us money, but my in-laws like to give us money whenever they hear of us buying a big item, from a dishwasher to a car, and sometimes school curric. It is much appreciated.

My dad does this for us. It is much appreciated.

[frugalmamatx]

I've had it happen a few times. Usually when I needed it most. 

 

Once DD and I went to Walmart close to the holidays and were browsing the clearance outside. A man walked up and handed me a $100 bill and said "God told me you needed this". It kept our lights on, and was a HUGE blessing. 

 

 

The other time a lady in line ahead of me at the grocery store insisted on paying for my items. I didn't have much, but it was a big help to stretch the budget. She was a cancer patient and blessing as many people as she could. 

[rainbird2]

A few months ago, I ran into a woman at a Starbucks with a newborn baby.  I asked her how old her baby was, and she told me 2 days old.  I said, "You are a brave woman to be out so soon!!"  She kind of rolled her eyes at me, and I didn't think much of it.  I just thought she was tired.  The woman went to the restroom, and her husband told me that his wife didn't want to be out.  Their family was evacuating from the fires in Napa.  She had the baby the night the fires began.  They had to leave everything and they were relocating until they were allowed to return.  He didn't seem too optimistic to return to a home in tact.

 

The kids and I found as much money as we could in our bags and car, then went back into the Starbucks and gave it to her.  We wish we could have done even more for them.  What a horrible, stressful situation.

 

 

[MinivanMom]

I've only had this happen to me at our State Fair, but it seems to happen every single year at the fair - sometimes multiple times. It's usually older people with a rural accent, but I always have people give my kids money and ride tickets. Once an elderly lady who was selling handmade sock monkeys and other animals chased us down to give my daughter a little sock kitty dd had been looking at as we walked past. Then she insisted on giving each kid a dollar. She said she'd grown up in a big family and remembered coming to the state fair with her siblings when she was a little girl. Very, very sweet. I can just imagine her parents in the 30's giving each kid a nickel and telling them not to spend it all in one place. 

 

I always assumed it was a rural culture thing. Most of the people comment about how they grew up in a big family or how they raised a big family, and they always comment on my kids being well-behaved. I think there's a lot of nostalgia there.

 

I tend to be a giver. I give money to homeless people, especially folks hanging out in the homeless friendly sections of downtown near the big bus station or near the shelters. We have also given money anonymously to people we know who are in crisis or have a financial need. But I can't imagine just walking up to a random person in Walmart and giving them cash; that would be a little out of my comfort zone in terms of socially appropriate behavior. I just wouldn't want to offend anyone by making assumptions about their personal situation.

[Soror]

I've had people give the kids money but I can't think of a time we were given money. We have given people money and done things for others.

[nixpix5]

I do this alot. If I am going through fast food sometimes I will ask them to pay for the person behind me, sometimes I will give a giant tip to someone, a couple times I dropped a random envelope in a mailbox with money in it and a note of good wishes, if I have extra I will do random things like this. I like not knowing who the person is or what they will think. My kids have started doing it with parts of their allowance. My own dad did it as I grew up and it has just been something instilled. I remember my dad, one freezing winter took his coat off and handed it to a homeless man along with 100 dollars in the pocket.

[kroe1]

The homeless in my town who are begging on the street corners earn about $70,000 to $100,000 a year. It is very organized. We suspect one person is running the whole show. By the way, that money is not taxed. Lol.

 

The money amount is estimated by someone who hid out and filmed a street corner for a day. They run shifts.

[hjffkj]

The homeless in my town who are begging on the street corners earn about $70,000 to $100,000 a year. It is very organized. We suspect one person is running the whole show. By the way, that money is not taxed. Lol.

 

The money amount is estimated by someone who hid out and filmed a street corner for a day. They run shifts.

This thread isn't really about that

[mom2scouts]

That has never happened to me! I know there are people who are looking for opportunities for "random acts of kindness" or "paying it forward" and maybe they picked your family. Maybe seeing a large family with well behaved children inspired them to do something nice.  Especially at this time of year, some people would rather not give to an established charity and just bless and surprise a local family as an expression of their holiday giving.

[TravelingChris]

The only time we ever got any money is once we were in a restaurant and an older gentleman remarked how well the kids behaved and gave each of them (3) a special quarter - like one of the state ones or whatever was the special ones at that time.  As to us giving peoole money- within homeschooling circles, I found out about families experience bad financial times.  I did various things like we had a collection in one group for a family. For another family, I dropped off grocery store gift cards, for another family I didn't charge tuition and then later contributed to a gofund me account when the husband died.  I believe I also once helped someone in a grocery store who was using WIC coupons and ran out of money.

 

As for homeless, I have supplied winter coats and other things like that they need and also have given money to local food banks and worked in one as a 4H project. 

 

We did have many people over the years come over to our table and complement the kids but I am glad they weren't buying our meals.  I really would feel badly if some stranger bought me a meal or paid for my groceries.  We don't need the help and it would just feel totally weird.

[Guest]

I haven’t given it to random strangers, but I have anonymously sent money or gift cards to people I was acquainted with who I knew were pinched.

 

I will say when I see lovely families, I do make an effort to complement the mom (or dad), especially if it is a large family. I figure they have heard lots of kooky remarks from strangers so I am trying to bless them with some kind words about their lovely family.

[Guest]

Once when I was buying coffee and a breakfast sandwich in a convenience store the man ahead of me bought it. Or maybe it was the guy in line behind me. It was such a confusing moment I don't remember. He did say he enjoyed the look on my face, and I thanked him, so at least I didn't appear ungracious about it.

 

A few weeks later in the same store I was going to buy for the kid in front of me; he looked like a college student. But then I realized he was just buying cigarettes and I didn't do it.

 

Honestly, I know I'm going to get slammed as an idiot for this, but I don't get how to do it without making a fuss. I was so preoccupied (in a hurry, running late) when it was done for me, I don't even know how the "logistics" of it worked.

 

I do give money sometimes to homeless people. My daughter has been talking about taking small bags with a couple dollars, a protein bar, and gloves and/or socks to give people next time she goes downtown. We see a lot of folks near and in the train stations.

I don’t think that is a dumb question. Once, when I was taking classes at CC, there was a young man in one of my classes whom I really admired. He was working so hard, trying to get a degree while working a job and also in the National Guard. At one point in the semester, he was in a car accident and missed class because of lack of transportation. I almost gave him some cash, a pretty significant amount of it, to fix his vehicle. I actually had some cash in an envelope to give to him, but I could not figure out how to do this without looking creepy or making things awkward for the rest of the semester. I didn’t do it. But I wanted to. But I kept thinking, “what will his parents think when he says he has the money to fix his car because a lady at college gave it to him?†If I had had a way to give it to him anonymously, I would have.

[HeartString]

I was stopped in the baby section at Walmart by a women who insisted on giving me money. She said it was in memory of a friends baby that had died a year prior. She wanted to hand out blessing in his name.