Prospective/New Homeschooling Questions

[MomOfABunch]

What questions did you have as a prospective/new homeschooler? What did you wish you knew?

 

I was asked to speak about how to get started homeschooling special education students by my local autism support group. I will be speaking for an hour. I'm going to start with local procedures, like how to inform the county and options for reporting progress, then move into things to consider and pros/cons of available educational options and end with frequently asked questions. I'm not planning to go into curriculum choices, but I do anticipate questions about this.

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

[PeterPan]

Interesting. I agree starting with how to comply with the law is important. I think the larger issue then becomes that some people, some students, are just not on the grid for homeschooling. Like what most people think of as homeschooling (like what I did with my dd for K5-12th, poof graduated now and gone to college) just isn't maybe what some kids need. So then to address that, I don't know, my head swims.

 

Personally, if I only had 45 minutes to give advice, I would be waving magic pixie dust and empowering them to read their evals and IEPs, look at their dc, use their common sense, fill in holes, and focus on the MOST IMPORTANT things. And I'd define most important by a mix of MGW's list (she has it somehwere probably on her website) and common sense.

 

-relationship

-more relationship

-social thinking so you can function in integrity and continue to have a relationship

-self-regulation

-self-discipline (habits, routines, getting on the group plan for the family)

-recognizing what you'd like to learn or are ready to learn and making a plan to do it and being on the plan and actually getting it done

 

Beyond that, school is a big trap. If I pushed "school" with my ds, I would lose what I have with him. His max is very low compared to some kids. But then I read what some kids do in multiple hours, and we do that in 1 hour. Like I know what we're getting done, and we really bang through a LOT when we work. But he's not working long periods of time. We spend a lot of time working on LIFE. We work on how to sort laundry, how to put away clothes, how to have healthy routines, how to go into the community, how to stay calm. Mighteor takes a chunk of our day. All this stuff takes time, and it's all the sum total of my efforts to help him.

 

But everybody has their starting point. Some kids have the behavior piece down and they just go do curriculum. I was talking with someone who leads an ASD support group in another city, and she was telling me how OVER THE MOON she was with K12. I was like REALLY??? But hey, she has gotten it to work for him! Right now we're more at the stage of fill in the holes, get him functional. Like schooling for school's sake, that's just not on the radar. But it's working for her.

 

I wouldn't want to lay a weight on someone making them think they needed to "do school" if "doing school" was not actually the most important thing for their dc right now. Sometimes you have to be more foundational and let it all come together in the end. 

Edited September 20, 2017 by OhElizabeth

[Lecka]

I don't homeschool, and my top concern would be finding social opportunities. I think if you could be sensitive to parents whose kids might not be ready to participate in some social settings that in general would be great for homeschoolers, that would be nice.

 

I would also be interested in local opportunities that were very special needs friendly, and how to talk to people about accommodations.

 

If you could recommend some accommodations that could be good and also easy to implement, I would like that, too.

 

I would also be interested in balancing therapy, daily life stuff, fun times, free time, academics, etc.

 

How to keep from getting into a bad routine with electronics -- or how to get in a good routine with electronics -- or suggestions for useful things to do with electronics.

 

But I think I would be interested in hearing what another thought whatever she talked about. Good luck, it sounds interesting!!!!!!!!

[MomOfABunch]

Interesting. I agree starting with how to comply with the law is important. I think the larger issue then becomes that some people, some students, are just not on the grid for homeschooling. Like what most people think of as homeschooling (like what I did with my dd for K5-12th, poof graduated now and gone to college) just isn't maybe what some kids need. So then to address that, I don't know, my head swims.  Yes, yes, yes!  This comes down to focusing on learning-to-learn behaviors, because you can't learn anything if you're not available for learning.  Accurate testing is necessary.  I can touch on this point in a to get started, you should really do this...but books and books and books have been written on this topic alone! I only have one hour....

 

Personally, if I only had 45 minutes to give advice, I would be waving magic pixie dust and empowering them to read their evals and IEPs, look at their dc, use their common sense, fill in holes, and focus on the MOST IMPORTANT things. Maybe the point here should be to make sure to take the time to figure out what the most important things are for the individual child.  For example, your child and my child need very, very different things, even though they have the same diagnosis, because they're different people and their disabilities affect them differently.  So take the time initially to "de-school" and carefully assess needs and strengths.  How to do that?  Oh boy...another topic that has books and books written on it.  And I'd define most important by a mix of MGW's list (she has it somehwere probably on her website) and common sense. I haven't seen this; I'll look it up.

 

-relationship

-more relationship

-social thinking so you can function in integrity and continue to have a relationship

-self-regulation

-self-discipline (habits, routines, getting on the group plan for the family)

-recognizing what you'd like to learn or are ready to learn and making a plan to do it and being on the plan and actually getting it done

Yes, I agree on all these.  I typically start with the "big 3"  -- potty training, behavior and functional communication, then academics and other higher level skills.

 

Beyond that, school is a big trap. If I pushed "school" with my ds, I would lose what I have with him. His max is very low compared to some kids. But then I read what some kids do in multiple hours, and we do that in 1 hour. Like I know what we're getting done, and we really bang through a LOT when we work. But he's not working long periods of time. We spend a lot of time working on LIFE. We work on how to sort laundry, how to put away clothes, how to have healthy routines, how to go into the community, how to stay calm. Mighteor takes a chunk of our day. All this stuff takes time, and it's all the sum total of my efforts to help him.  Yes!  Back to the learning-to-learn behavior prerequisites.

 

But everybody has their starting point. Some kids have the behavior piece down and they just go do curriculum. I was talking with someone who leads an ASD support group in another city, and she was telling me how OVER THE MOON she was with K12. I was like REALLY??? ​Really?  They won't enroll anyone working more than one grade level behind!  But hey, she has gotten it to work for him! Right now we're more at the stage of fill in the holes, get him functional. Like schooling for school's sake, that's just not on the radar. But it's working for her.

 

I wouldn't want to lay a weight on someone making them think they needed to "do school" if "doing school" was not actually the most important thing for their dc right now. Sometimes you have to be more foundational and let it all come together in the end. This is a great point.  Maybe I need to start with a brief intro to special education...regardless of where a child is educated.  Life skills, household chores, activities, can all be school.  Fortunately, we don't have to count hours/days or report very much in my state.

 

Thank you for helping me think this through!!  Figuring out what to focus on is making me crazy because there.is.so.much.to.say!!

[MomOfABunch]

I don't homeschool, and my top concern would be finding social opportunities. I think if you could be sensitive to parents whose kids might not be ready to participate in some social settings that in general would be great for homeschoolers, that would be nice.  This is a good idea.

I would also be interested in local opportunities that were very special needs friendly, and how to talk to people about accommodations.

Another great idea.  The autism group that asked me to speak does a lot of this kind of thing.

If you could recommend some accommodations that could be good and also easy to implement, I would like that, too.

​I can go over the accommodation page used in schools and point out the applicable ones for homeschooling.  It's also a good idea to keep a record of this if there is any chance the child may ever go to school or college so it will be easier to possibly receive the same accommodations there.

I would also be interested in balancing therapy, daily life stuff, fun times, free time, academics, etc.

Yes, this is very tricky, like juggling!  And every child/family/situation will have a different answer.

How to keep from getting into a bad routine with electronics -- or how to get in a good routine with electronics -- or suggestions for useful things to do with electronics.

I hadn't thought to include this.  Probably the best one is to decide what the electronic policy will be and start it from day 1 of homeschooling.  

But I think I would be interested in hearing what another thought whatever she talked about. Good luck, it sounds interesting!!!!!!!!

Thank you!!

[Lecka]

I would actually love to hear about parents who are pretty successful with electronics who are not super-parents.

 

I have been curious about apps that limit time or keep kids on a certain app.

 

My son does great with Reflex Math but I have to keep an eye on him or he will exit it and turn on a game.

[Lecka]

Oh, maybe talk about burn-out, or ways for parents to build in little breaks or ways to re-charge.

[Lecka]

Balancing siblings and picking activities that can either be great for one kid and a nightmare for the other..... or appropriate for one but boring and "I'm stuck always being a helper" for the other.

 

I am about to sign up my kids for some activities after a lot of time off, I am hoping they can actually do some of the same things and have it go well for both of them.

[PeterPan]

Lecka, I think sometimes people find really rudimentary solutions, like they put the educational apps on one device and the games on another and password lock and lock down the game devices. You're right you can't be that fine-tuned. 

 

That kind of stuff is just specific to the family and situation. Mighteor did that, moving all apps aside so the tablet, at least to the average dc (novice) is a dedicated device. 

[PeterPan]

But the other thing is, I hate when people give newbies advice on what to do. I went to talks for newbies when I was getting started homeschooling, and some of the things there guilted me with ideas that I let control me for way too long into my homeschooling journey. I just assumed they were right because they were christians or they were experienced or... And really, people have to figure things out for THEMSELVES. They have to be encouraged to listen to the still small voice in their hearts, to do what's right for their families. And people who say oh this is good, this is how we do things, can be directing someone onto a path that isn't going to be their best path. 

 

I think empowerment is way safer than advice.

[MomOfABunch]

You guys are hitting exactly on the problem I'm having.  Special education is so individualized that you can't give good cookie cutter advice and have it magically work for lots of families.  This is why I don't want to get into curriculum choices, or any other specific advice that will work for some sometimes and not all, all the time.

 

I also have absolutely no idea how many people will be attending.  10? 100? No clue.  

 

Instead of a straight presentation, I could do it like a workshop and prepare a packet for them to fill out.  Something like "So, you may want to homeschool your child with special needs?  Here are 100 things to think about" and have them take notes to think about and be able to make their own decisions based on their family's needs.

 

So way back in the beginning before you 100% committed to homeschooling, what would have been helpful to know?  That's a better question, I suppose.

[kbutton]

If you do a packet sort of thing like you mentioned, I think that could help a lot. I think having handouts helps people know where your talk is headed (or could be headed), and then there are fewer rabbit trails. They can refrain from asking questions stream of consciousness if they can see their concerns are on the next page or whatever.

 

You might also ask up front what kinds of concerns they have and write a list (by category). Then, you can tailor how much time you take for various parts of your talk. I have done this twice with a broad group, and it was really helpful to know where to spend my talking time.

 

I think I would want to know what happens if...I really can't make progress on behaviors, social, etc.? (I am not a therapist.) What is my role vs. therapy's role? 

 

Around here, homeschoolers can use a special scholarship fund, but there are people that don't understand that unless they choose a full-service school, they still have to teach their child. They can't just have a tutor twice a week in the AM and call it done. They have to follow-up and put in the rest of the hours (we don't have to prove hours here, but we have to provide x hours of instruction during the year). 

 

[OneStepAtATime]

I like the idea of a packet.  Something that includes resources for future research by the parent.  It would be impossible to cover what each person actually may need.

 

I went to short duration seminars where someone tried to provide that info and both were less than useless.  The only live interaction short duration seminar that provided me with anything helpful long term was Kathy Kuhl, who wrote Homeschooling Your Struggling Learner (among other things) and has the Learn Differently website.  She had some useful suggestions but also places to look for additional information.  She basically gave us tools for looking further into our own specific circumstances.

 

Having a packet of information, along with resources to delve into further, seems like the best option in your circumstances.  It could be just the lifeline that others might need.

[summerreading]

How to handle being around your kids all day, this is the one I hear the most from friends and what I was wondering. How to find time for yourself and avoid getting overwhelmed. 

[merry gardens]

I understand why you don't want to give curriculum advise, but I suggest you mention there are many, many resources available and maybe direct them to where the can learn more. Also mention educators at home or in school can't possibly fit every great book, course plan, technique or method into the school day--and even if they could, for many special needs students, "less is more".

[Pen]

You guys are hitting exactly on the problem I'm having.  Special education is so individualized that you can't give good cookie cutter advice and have it magically work for lots of families.  This is why I don't want to get into curriculum choices, or any other specific advice that will work for some sometimes and not all, all the time.

 

I suggest you say that right near the beginning and include ideas as per the quote from Merry G in your info packet.

 

I also have absolutely no idea how many people will be attending.  10? 100? No clue.  

 

Any way to get advanced count even roughly?

 

Instead of a straight presentation, I could do it like a workshop and prepare a packet for them to fill out.  Something like "So, you may want to homeschool your child with special needs?  Here are 100 things to think about" and have them take notes to think about and be able to make their own decisions based on their family's needs.

 

Sounds like a good idea.

 

So way back in the beginning before you 100% committed to homeschooling, what would have been helpful to know?  That's a better question, I suppose.

 

My child is not ASD, but the most helpful advice was to just start in, in a gradual way. To get to know what my child needed. Also, for us, to use materials a la carte rather than a full program because my child was not enough in step with typical grade level for a whole program approach to work well.  That would probably apply to most ASD kids too.

 

 

I understand why you don't want to give curriculum advise, but I suggest you mention there are many, many resources available and maybe direct them to where the can learn more. Also mention educators at home or in school can't possibly fit every great book, course plan, technique or method into the school day--and even if they could, for many special needs students, "less is more".

[Pen]

In getting a rough advance count (maybe an email sent to membership) could that be a chance to ask in advance for what people already planning to attend would like to know so you can address specific questions?

[MomOfABunch]

A lot to consider!!  Thank you all. Your ideas are very helpful!

 

As far as audience numbers, I can probably find out how many people have registered for the conference so far, but there's no way to know how many people will come to this workshop.  There are several going on in each time slot.

 

So far, here's my list of topics to cover:  I'll work on resource lists next, so I'd really appreciate your favorites that correspond to any of these topics.  Then, I'll work on making a powerpoint and figure out exactly what to say about each.  

 

Topics:

-       Homeschooling, local policies and paperwork, and other educational options

-       Why should I consider homeschooling my special needs child?

-       Start gradually, one subject at a time; de-schooling is ok

-       Can’t do everything, and that’s ok.  Less is more; back to basics

-       What's your educational style? What's your child's learning style?

-       Many, many curriculum choices available. I'll probably list a few common names as a starting point for brand new families

-       Academic skills -  Special Ed = k-3 education. – list reading and math skill progression through grade 3.  Going in order is important, look for holes in foundational skills.  The importance of accurate assessment.

-       Learning to learn skills (behavior, functional language) take priority over academics, because if a child is not available for learning, he won’t learn any academics you’re trying to teach

-       Daily scheduling, balance therapy, daily life, fun stuff, free time, academics, siblings, etc.

-       Electronic Usage – decide on family policy and begin from day 1 of homeschooling

-       Burn out; taking care of yourself is important; strategies for being with your kids all day

-       Local social opportunities – join our local groups, they plan tons of things for our kids

 

[OneStepAtATime]

Maybe also try hard to tap into areas of interest and help them hone skills in those areas of interest. It helps feed their inner selves and on bad days that might be their only motivator. Plus it could lead to career choices they haven't even thought of yet.

[Lecka]

That sounds really good!