So when DD graduated HS, we made an agreement with her about what we would be paying for versus her. She got a partial scholarship, but we are still paying about $10,000 a year, which is huge for us. This includes a meal plan, so she is not going to starve.
DD has always not been responsible with money. Part of it is just frivolousness, part of it she is exceedingly generous with friends, always paying for things, buying gifts. It's a sweet quality, but biting her.
She got a lot of money for graduation, and I told her she needed to save most of it for during the school year. She spent all of it. She worked in the summer, and spent most of it, saving a small, small amount. When all this was happening, I was reminding her that we would not be paying for extra spending money at college. We are paying the college bill, and when she visits we take her to the store to buy necessities. We are paying her phone, etc. We are also paying gas if she wants to come home to visit, but not gas for driving around town, etc. So, this is not going to hurt her, but still hard.
She texted this morning asking if we could talk about a monthly allowance. I told her no. I reminded her of our discussions.
Help me be strong! She has to learn this. It's hard. She is going to have a hard year all year because she did not save anything. But I really don't know how else she is going to learn this lesson.
Editing to add... she's not being obnoxious about this. She says she knows she was really stupid and is embarrassed about it. But of course that make me feel more like I want to help, but have to be strong!
Edited by goldberry, 11 September 2017 - 01:26 PM.