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Public high school in 5 days – what do I need to know?


Ivey
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We allow our kids to decide whether they attend public high school or continue homeschooling. The first three chose homeschooling, but I always expected Ds14 to choose public school when the time came. I brought it up with him in May, and he quickly told me that he wanted to stay at home. I encouraged him to take more time before making his decision, but he said he didn’t want to waste time worrying about it and that homeschooling was his final answer.

 

Last night, he sat us down (which always makes me very nervous) and told us he’d changed his mind. He’s 100% sure he wants to go to public school, which starts on Wednesday. :willy_nilly:

 

I called the school today and began the enrollment process. I was able to make an appointment with his guidance counselor for Monday, and I’ll have to sign some forms with the secretary as well. She assured me that the guidance counselor will be able to explain the various diploma paths (we’re in Texas where there are “endorsements†that kids complete in addition to the core graduation, which I’ve completely ignored as a homeschooler), transfer Ds’s high school-level credits from middle school, draft a 4-year graduation plan, and register him for classes all on the spot. I’m skeptical that he’ll have the time and patience for all of this, so I want to do as much of the work for him as I can.

 

I’ve spent all evening poring over the course catalog, 9th grade parent packet, and a PowerPoint the school put together about course selection. I understand what’s available and what’s required, but I’m not sure where Ds fits.

 

There are no “honors†classes. The core 9th/10th grade classes have three tracks - applied/foundational, regular, and Pre-AP. Where does a bright kid without any real interest in academics fall?

 

Is there anything I should know about choosing courses, or anything you wish you’d known? This school requires that students take 7 credits in 9th grade, and doesn’t use block scheduling.  

 

I'm think the academics will fall into place. Ds does care about electives (theatre, music, dance, creative writing, art, PE) and will have strong opinions in that area, so I'm hoping the counsellor can help guide is in the right direction for the core courses. 

 

I haven't even started worrying about the social side of high school. Ds is a tall, handsome, likeable, confident kid, and I think he’ll be fine socially in the long run, but I do think his expectations are too high starting out. First off, he has a bunch of friends at this school, but they’re all older than he is. I’m not sure that it’ll be as easy as he thinks it will be to hang out with them and be accepted by their other friends. More worrying for me is that he’s gay, has no interest in keeping it under wraps, and might not have the life experience to handle other kids' or the staff's reactions. He hasn't been "sheltered" in the traditional sense, but he and the rest of our family definitely gravitate toward people and groups that are exceptionally accepting. One of his reasons for wanting to attend school is to get involved in theatre and make friends that share this interest, and I think he’s envisioning High School Musical. When I asked him if he thought anyone at this school would bully kids who are gay or into theatre, he completely blew me off: “Mom, it’s 2017.†I reminded him that we live in Texas and not to expect everyone to be as accepting as they are in the cheerleading, theatre, and social media worlds. Still, he thinks his generation is “over itâ€. 

 

Ds has never been to school at all, and has never even taken an outsourced academic class, so I’m sure I’ll have to help him get organized and develop a system/routine for keeping up with his assignments. Any tips for this transition?

Any advice for getting him ready to begin school next week?

 

Any words of wisdom for me? I usually have months to stress over big transitions, but I’m sure good at cramming it all into a few days when I have to!

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I'll go for the most difficult academic track which I guess is the pre-AP. That is because my school district would give more grief trying to go to a harder track than switching to an "easier" track.

 

Is there any placement tests? Here the typical placement tests is for math and sometimes for English as well. Find out where he would place in Math for 9th grade. Also depending on the school he might end up doing placement tests during the guidance counselor meeting.

 

Regarding the guidance counselor meeting, are you allowed to sit in or is it going to be student only? Locally I know they do a parent briefing but the actual guidance counselor meetings is student only because they don't want helicopter parents in the meetings. We do have rather pushy parents here so kids may not feel free to talk with their parents around.

 

Someone in my kids German school was in high school musical when he was in high school. They had to sell tickets for their school performances and the cheapest was $15 per ticket. So just be prepared to have to help sell tickets if your son decide to participate in high school musicals.

 

My oldest wants to go back to B&M for high school and my neighbors has been kind in answering whatever they went through including with guidance counselors are more helpful. Our two public high schools are large and I think they have three guidance counselors each.

Edited by Arcadia
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Yes, he is probably going to need some help keeping track and navigating for a while.  Since he has never taken even one outsourced class and never been in a brick and mortar school I assume he has gotten all of his assignments from you?  Now he will be dealing with multiple teachers, all of whom may have different expectations for their students.  It may take some time for him to really figure out what is expected in each classroom.  Most of it will be little stuff that may be frustrating at first but he should adjust to quickly.  Some may take longer.  Kids in PS have a lot of just kind of built in organizational supports but the kids that have been attending school all these years already know them and won't need much assistance.  Your son may not intuitively figure out all the little ins and outs that others take for granted and assume are common knowledge.  Hopefully he can ask questions and get some solid answers from classmates/teachers.

 

He is likely going to be extremely tired the first few weeks.  It can be exhausting if you aren't used to being around large crowds of kids and keeping up with multiple teachers and being "on" for 8+ hours with no break.  Plus homework.  Make sure he gets plenty of sleep and help him get into a good routine for when he comes home.  There may be papers for you to sign and he will have homework and projects, etc.  It will be hard, at least at first, to keep track of it all.  Help him get his own support systems in place to navigate these waters.  I don't mean take over and micromanage but help walk him through things.

 

And there will probably be days he really doesn't feel up to going or may get stressed out about something or angry or whatever.  Unless it is an extreme issue, don't knee jerk react and pull him out.  After a couple of days he may realize he still wants to be there and was just having a bad day.  Pulling him out then putting him back in again will be problematic at best.  Give decisions time.  If he has a bad day, that's normal.  We all have bad days once in a while.  Give it at least a few days to maybe even a few weeks (depending on the specifics) and if he is still upset see if this is something that the school needs to step in on or if you really feel it is insurmountable and he needs to come home.

 

 

Hopefully the transition will be a smooth one.  Good luck.  :)

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I'd advise him to have a to do calendar or app, and during each class, right when an assignment is given, to jot it down on the due date. Tonight's homework, next week's reading, next month's project, etc.

 

The school may have a LBGT club or maybe a local chapter in case he is finding discrimination.

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Academically, as another poster said go for the highest track, pre AP as you've listed. Schools will let you step down more easily than up.

 

Watch exec function skills. Maybe start with you heavily involved with you helping him maintain a calendar. Calendar would be short term and long gterm. Do daily backpack dump and paper organization, perhaps using a file storage box and hanging files for each class. Get schedules of days and times teachers offer help before school, after school, lunch.

 

Social stuff I'm no good at. I think high school is often hard for all types of kids. I think I'd let him know it's ok for him to change his mind and homeschool at any point, buy convey that in a way he doesn't feel he has to prove he can stick it out. I was severely depressed due to social issues in high school. It would have helped me a lot to know there was an alternative, even if I wouldn't have taken it. So the decision to not be home is not a no turning back thing.

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You did not ask for advice, so this isn't advice, but...is it possible he could get involved with theater, music, sports without going to public school? Does your city have such opportunities?

 

It just kind of sounds like he has a lot to lose. He's comfortable in his own skin, used to people liking him, well adjusted and good at stuff. It sounds to me like he's mature for his age, as well.

 

I'm afraid he'd be going backwards, in many public schools. Less challenging academically, bizarre new roadblocks socially, weird politics...

 

I'm sorry for bringing it up, but we've been considering public school for our youngest, who is a grade younger than your son, so I've been thinking about it. If we lived somewhere else - maybe California, or a cosmopolitan eastern city - our boy could find his tribe at school. But here, it's a little narrow politically and every other way. Nice folks, but our son would have to keep most of his true self under wraps just to not deal with stupidity every day. And he's not gay, or a minority, or too far an outlier economically. He's just more liberal politically, and better read!

 

So we will be hs'ing through high school, which will look like living in the car as we drive further into the city for many, many activities including theater. I think I've got it set up for him to be around people and stay busy, nearly every day of the week. It's going to get exhausting for me, so I've also got an eye on the possibility of early college or dual enrollment at some point.

 

I just think that if we have bright, well adjusted, happy young teens, that's just such a huge blessing. I wouldn't want to risk regression from living in the ps high school fish bowl, when if left OUT of it, the young man would be nearly grown here in the adult world, having just skipped all that garbage. So that's my decision for my kid.

 

I don't know that all ps is bad, bad, bad, of course. Might be a lot better where you are. Maybe theater is very awesome, maybe there's an lgbt club with teacher support, etc. But I like what a pp said about letting your son know there's an off ramp if it's not wonderful and he starts to feel suffocated. That seems really important for a young person to know.

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I haven't even started worrying about the social side of high school. Ds is a tall, handsome, likeable, confident kid, and I think he’ll be fine socially in the long run, but I do think his expectations are too high starting out. First off, he has a bunch of friends at this school, but they’re all older than he is. I’m not sure that it’ll be as easy as he thinks it will be to hang out with them and be accepted by their other friends. More worrying for me is that he’s gay, has no interest in keeping it under wraps, and might not have the life experience to handle other kids' or the staff's reactions. He hasn't been "sheltered" in the traditional sense, but he and the rest of our family definitely gravitate toward people and groups that are exceptionally accepting. One of his reasons for wanting to attend school is to get involved in theatre and make friends that share this interest, and I think he’s envisioning High School Musical. When I asked him if he thought anyone at this school would bully kids who are gay or into theatre, he completely blew me off: “Mom, it’s 2017.†I reminded him that we live in Texas and not to expect everyone to be as accepting as they are in the cheerleading, theatre, and social media worlds. Still, he thinks his generation is “over itâ€. 

 

 

 

For the most part he is right.  Students will be accepting.   Now, he may get a teacher or two who is older and less accepting.  I am a school counselor in a somewhat rural suburb of a large city in NC and in the interview I was asked THREE questions about working with LGBT students.  I was surprised.  I wasn't even asked that in the city school interviews. They said that they have had a lot of students, but their biggest issue is with some of the staff (older, set in their ways, etc...)

 

And if he already has friends who attend, he knows more of their culture.

 

As for the academics, I don't know what it is like there, but here, if the parents request a higher level (pre-AP, AP, etc...) the student can automatically get in from a homeschooling background.  When my middle son went to high school for the first time in 10th grade, we requested 2 honors classes, they put him in, no questions asked.  He has done fine.  He has not taken any AP, but that is his own choice and we haven't really pushed it.  He is a great kid and smart, but he is my "[path of least resistance" kid and quite honestly, doesn't care if it takes him the full 4 years to finish college, he would actually prefer that.  He is quite social and likes to take his time.  We are fine with that.

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Are you looking for what actual classes to sign up for?  Pretty much all kids at my son's school did the following freshman year:

 

Foreign language

Math (95 percent were in Geometry or Algebra II)

Science (biology)

History (World History)

English I

PE requirement

Elective

Study Hall (I would highly recommend this for anyone new to brick and mortar school because the amount of homework can be a lot and this helps with time management when they get home)

 

I would highly recommend a study skills class.  The Well Trained Mind Academy has a semester long online one.  

 

The most important things mine needed help with when he went to middle school were (a) reminders (constantly) to have a homework journal where you write down every assignment the teacher gives, no matter how convinced you are that you will remember it; (b) have a folder where your "to be turned in" work is located because you will not find it shoved in your backpack or locker;  © anything the teacher writes down on the board should be in your notes somewhere; and (d) make sure your headers (name, date, subject, etc.) are in the proper format (this last lesson took my son all of middle school to get through his head, and he lost a lot of points for this very simple thing).

 

I would also highly suggest you take his weakest academic subject and really scaffold him - as in, sit down with him each and every night and go through the day's lesson in his text book and show him how to take notes, how to spend 5 minutes reviewing previous days notes, how to pull out important info, etc.

 

For you, be prepared for the school to take every single quirk or perceived shortcoming he has and blame it on homeschooling.  Rest assured none of his successes or positive qualities will be attributed to homeschooling though....

 

Do you get to sit in on the counselor meeting to look at his credits?  I would probably go in there prepared to battle for each and every one.  Make sure that you understand how many middle school credits can transfer in.  Our school has a limit of how many can be counted towards Honors or Advanced degree options.

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As a former teacher, I'm going to disagree with previous posters about taking the pre-AP track. If he doesn't have any academic interest, these classes may not be for him. If he wants to be involved in extracurriculars, he can have more time to focus on those while doing easier classes. He can still go into AP classes if he'd like to when they're available.

 

Sent from my Moto G (4) using Tapatalk

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Are you looking for what actual classes to sign up for?  Pretty much all kids at my son's school did the following freshman year:

 

Foreign language

Math (95 percent were in Geometry or Algebra II)

Science (biology)

History (World History)

English I

PE requirement

Elective

Study Hall (I would highly recommend this for anyone new to brick and mortar school because the amount of homework can be a lot and this helps with time management when they get home)

 

Many school no longer offer study hall.  Ours does not.

 

I would highly recommend a study skills class.  The Well Trained Mind Academy has a semester long online one.  

 

Unless her son specifically needs it, I wouldn't bother with this class.  OP, your son is in theater, I would capitalize on the time he has to let him take as much as the school offers.  My son is in theater and has taken 3 full years of it in high school.

 

The most important things mine needed help with when he went to middle school were (a) reminders (constantly) to have a homework journal where you write down every assignment the teacher gives, no matter how convinced you are that you will remember it; (b) have a folder where your "to be turned in" work is located because you will not find it shoved in your backpack or locker;  © anything the teacher writes down on the board should be in your notes somewhere; and (d) make sure your headers (name, date, subject, etc.) are in the proper format (this last lesson took my son all of middle school to get through his head, and he lost a lot of points for this very simple thing).

 

Again, if the OP's son doesn't need this, a brief check for the first few weeks is sufficient.  If OP's son has issues with this, she hasn't stated it.  My son didn't need a lot of help in this area and we let go of the reigns when he went to school and he has stepped up more than we anticipated.

 

I would also highly suggest you take his weakest academic subject and really scaffold him - as in, sit down with him each and every night and go through the day's lesson in his text book and show him how to take notes, how to spend 5 minutes reviewing previous days notes, how to pull out important info, etc.

 

For you, be prepared for the school to take every single quirk or perceived shortcoming he has and blame it on homeschooling.  Rest assured none of his successes or positive qualities will be attributed to homeschooling though....

 

We did not experience this at all.

 

Do you get to sit in on the counselor meeting to look at his credits?  I would probably go in there prepared to battle for each and every one.  Make sure that you understand how many middle school credits can transfer in.  Our school has a limit of how many can be counted towards Honors or Advanced degree options.

 

Huh.....we just handed over his transcript and they took us at our word and allowed him all the credits he earned.  But if the OP's son hasn't done high school credit in 8th grade, it won't be necessary to deal with.  And I would suggest not going in there with a "I have to battle you people over this" way of thinking.  AND, in many cases, it wouldn't hurt to just take the class again (I am thinking Algebra specifically, although now that it is Math 1 it is harder to get out of) for credit unless the OP needs specific math classes because her son is going into a specific STEM field, which it sounds like he isn't.  

 

My thoughts in red.

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Before I even read your part about your son's orientation, I was going to say, "Make sure he knows the social landscape can have strange 'rules'". While I agree that the climate is better overall for LGBTQ students/people, it's not "nothing". My son (who is straight) was, I think, shocked and confused that things matter that he has never given thought to, like what kind of shoes one wears (they call it "Having shoe game"), what phones/devices you have, what activities you do. And this was private school!

 

My son is tall, good-looking and good at sports and music. I think he was so used to social acceptance being a total non-issue, it was shocking to him to realize he was "not cool like Garrett," for example. And I'm looking at this supposedly A-list cool guy and thinking, "What? This kid is the kingpin cool guy in the school? He's not even all that handsome!" 😄 But he did have ten pairs of $100+ shoes. And whatever the most recent iPhone was at the time. ðŸ˜

 

It's hard to predict what will matter to our kids if/when they enter school. My DD is older and was the first of our family to ever enter a school building. For her, I was alert to the fact that she might feel her clothes or things were not cool enough, because I think girls care about that more than guys. But it actually was not an issue for her. She did ask for certain things once she learned what brands and stores were cool (nothing outrageous, just things like a Vera Bradley backpack), but she very quickly was welcomed into a core group of girls who remained her group throughout and beyond high school. For my son, I didn't even realize guys might have these kind of rules, too, but DS was much more bothered that he didn't have cool things, and it was more difficult for him to settle into a group of friends.

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Before I even read your part about your son's orientation, I was going to say, "Make sure he knows the social landscape can have strange 'rules'". While I agree that the climate is better overall for LGBTQ students/people, it's not "nothing". My son (who is straight) was, I think, shocked and confused that things matter that he has never given thought to, like what kind of shoes one wears (they call it "Having shoe game"), what phones/devices you have, what activities you do. And this was private school!

 

My son is tall, good-looking and good at sports and music. I think he was so used to social acceptance being a total non-issue, it was shocking to him to realize he was "not cool like Garrett," for example. And I'm looking at this supposedly A-list cool guy and thinking, "What? This kid is the kingpin cool guy in the school? He's not even all that handsome!" 😄 But he did have ten pairs of $100+ shoes. And whatever the most recent iPhone was at the time. ðŸ˜

 

It's hard to predict what will matter to our kids if/when they enter school. My DD is older and was the first of our family to ever enter a school building. For her, I was alert to the fact that she might feel her clothes or things were not cool enough, because I think girls care about that more than guys. But it actually was not an issue for her. She did ask for certain things once she learned what brands and stores were cool (nothing outrageous, just things like a Vera Bradley backpack), but she very quickly was welcomed into a core group of girls who remained her group throughout and beyond high school. For my son, I didn't even realize guys might have these kind of rules, too, but DS was much more bothered that he didn't have cool things, and it was more difficult for him to settle into a group of friends.

 

I think that depends on the kid too.  My oldest isn't "cool" and doesn't care.  He has his little group of friends and that is all he cares about.  My youngest is more popular and cares a whole heck of a lot more about what kind of clothing, shoes, and iPhone he has. 

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I vote for pre-AP, for core classes like English and maths.   A lot of the smart cool kids will be in pre-AP.   Slackers and goofballs more apt to be in other tracks. Might as well go pre-AP - that is how you'd have taught him at home, right?

 

My middle dd (the one now being groomed to be the business manager for a shipping company of 500+ employees, she makes more than her dad now!) hated school, insisted on regular classes instead of AP/Honors (of which she was more than capable).  The expectation of "regular" English class was so low, and dd admitted most of her classes she was playing games or napping and still passing each class.  I felt and still feel that for her the last few years of high school were a complete waste of time.   My other two took all the AP classes they could and were much more challenged AND educated.  

 

Could always switch tracks later if preAP doesn't work out but probably easier to move out of the pre-AP track if need be than into it from one of the other tracks.

 

As far as being teased or tormented for being gay and not hiding it at school - have his back against bullying, but also look at public high school as training for what may face him at times in the post-school adult world, too.

 

Good luck!

Edited by JFSinIL
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Another vote for Pre-AP for a bright kid.  At some schools, doors may close to APs later on if the student isn't already in the proper track, not to mention the foundation in skills may be more substantial in the Pre-AP classes.  Plus, such classes might be more interesting.  If there is any chance at all that this bright student might end up wanting to apply to competitive colleges later, he will want to take some APs if the school offers them.  That wouldn't need to be in every subject, but in the spirit of keeping doors open, I'd try to get the bright freshman into as many honors/Pre-AP classes as the school allows - I am not convinced that the workload in an honors/Pre-AP class is likely to be substantially more voluminous than a regular level class, though naturally that would vary by teacher.

My biggest piece of advice is that, if he has already taken algebra 1 (or higher), have him do some review this weekend to prepare for math placement testing.  Most high schools will require testing to place out of math courses.  It is easy to forget over the summer, do poorly on a placement test, remember right afterward, and end up repeating a course for no good reason.  Even if he hasn't, if the school requires a math placement test just on prealgebra, I'd have him review that a bit.  A couple of days of memory-refreshing can make a huge difference.  ETA, same for foreign language, if he has already had the equivalent of a year (or more) of high school foreign language, expect a placement test and review prior to it.

Edited by wapiti
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I have a dd going into 10th grade in Texas.

 

Go for Pre-AP in Math and English if possible.  Those classes usually get the stronger teachers and the more 'dedicated' students.  My daughter chose to not take Pre-AP Biology and was thrilled with her 99% average in the 'regular' Biology course (she felt she actually had the better teacher-- now she wants to major in science!)-- she is scheduled for Pre-AP Chemistry this year...  Those are the only Pre-AP classes for 9th graders that our district offers.

 

Warning-- if you sign him up for Pre-AP English there is usually a 'summer assignment' that is tested on the first week so ask about this if you enroll him in this level.

 

Our small town is surprisingly accepting...

 

Don't worry too much about the endorsements-- just put "Theater" -- this will give him more of a priority for those classes.  (My daughter started with an 'Instrumental Music' endorsement last year and will most likely change it to science-- but I looked and it really does not matter as far as her course selection goes until her Sr year..

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In my experience (two kids who have done this so far) it takes into the Spring semester before they really find their little niche and feel they belong. So prepare for that. I warned Middle that it would take that long and over winter break she was freaking out that she still didn't have friends and I said to give it another month or two and that's exactly what happened.

 

You might find that your son is right and that his generation, for the most part, is "over it." Oldest has encountered some outspoken homophobes but they are the minority and she's good at dismissing them from her mind. It's a good skill to have. Otherwise, she's never encountered any real bullying. I also share concerns that her teen years have her living in this protected little bubble, but at the same time, I have no desire to burst it. She's not out to family members who would be judgemental, or at least if they are, they certainly keep it to themselves. `

 

Edited by Mimm
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I can relate - my oldest 2 kids (son and daughter) went to public hs after being homeschooled K-8th.

 

Some tips:

 

1.  You want him to be in the accelerated classes.  I was concerned that advanced geometry would be too difficult for dd with the whole transition to new school anxiety, but after the first day of class, she told me, "Mom, the kids in class talk the entire time the teacher's talking.  They really don't care about class or the teacher.  They're so rude, and I can't hear what the teacher's saying."  I switched her out immediately, and she was fine in the advanced course.  She had to take World Civ when all the other advanced kids were taking an AP psych class (bc she was hsed and didn't have teacher approval for the AP class).  She was miserable.  Teacher was always in a bad mood bc other kids in class were obnoxious.  All that to say, the accel. classes aren't much more difficult and the quality of kids/learning in the higher classes is worth it.

 

2.  Check to see if your school has a gay student alliance club.  They are very supportive.  I agree with your son - you might be surprised how much more open and accepting this generation of kids is compared to our generation.  My husband teaches at local middle school, and he's always talking about how nice kids are these days.  ** Very encouraging, and we live in south in very conservative school district.

 

3.  Before first day, take him to school and walk with him through his schedule.  This was very helpful for my kids to know where classes were located and how day would "work".

 

4.  Have him practice combination lock for locker.

 

If I think of anything else, I'll let you know.  Please pm me if you have any specific questions.  It has been a good experience for both kids!

Edited by creekmom
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Sorry I’m late getting back to this! I started to respond, then got tied up fulfilling my kid’s volunteer commitment.  

 

Thanks for all the input about course selections! It looks like the choices are:

1. English 1 (regular or Pre-AP)

2. Geometry (regular or Pre-AP)

3. Biology (regular or Pre-AP)

4. World Geography (regular, Pre-AP, or AP)

5. French 2 (regular, there’s no Pre-AP option until level 3) or Spanish/German/Latin/Chinese 1

 

Plus two electives:

Theatre 1 (covers both Fine Arts and Speech requirement)

Theatre Production 1 (covers Fine Arts, audition only, which I just realized, eek)

Dance 1 (covers PE requirement)

Health Education (1/2 credit, required for graduation)

 

In terms of the actual level of the material, I feel Ds can handle the Pre-AP classes, but I’m worried about the extra time commitment. The 9th grade parent packet warns, “Students should limit themselves to a manageable number of Pre-AP/AP courses taken in one school year, because of time requirements. If you are involved in extracurricular activities, signing up for many Pre-AP courses can be stressful. We highly recommend that you consider the scope of time needed to study when choosing your course load.†Students are also required to sign a contract that states they are “willing to spend hours outside of class completing research, projects, and supplemental readingâ€, which might put Ds off the whole Pre-AP/AP thing.

 

I’ll ask about the time commitment when I meet with the guidance counselor, and also ask roughly how many kids actually take each version of the class. If there are only 1-2 slots of each Pre-AP class, there must be plenty of good kids and decent students in the regular classes. The more kids who take Pre-AP, the weaker the regular classes are likely to be.

 

The secretary told that transferring credit for math and languages is usually routine, but that there’s a chance Ds will be asked to take placement tests. We’re only asking for credit for Algebra 1 and French 1 (he’s completed 19 chapters of AoPS Intro to Algebra and two years of French), so hopefully this will go smoothly.

 

You did not ask for advice, so this isn't advice, but...is it possible he could get involved with theater, music, sports without going to public school? Does your city have such opportunities?

It just kind of sounds like he has a lot to lose. He's comfortable in his own skin, used to people liking him, well adjusted and good at stuff. It sounds to me like he's mature for his age, as well.

I'm afraid he'd be going backwards, in many public schools. Less challenging academically, bizarre new roadblocks socially, weird politics...

I'm sorry for bringing it up, but we've been considering public school for our youngest, who is a grade younger than your son, so I've been thinking about it. If we lived somewhere else - maybe California, or a cosmopolitan eastern city - our boy could find his tribe at school. But here, it's a little narrow politically and every other way. Nice folks, but our son would have to keep most of his true self under wraps just to not deal with stupidity every day. And he's not gay, or a minority, or too far an outlier economically. He's just more liberal politically, and better read!

So we will be hs'ing through high school, which will look like living in the car as we drive further into the city for many, many activities including theater. I think I've got it set up for him to be around people and stay busy, nearly every day of the week. It's going to get exhausting for me, so I've also got an eye on the possibility of early college or dual enrollment at some point.

I just think that if we have bright, well adjusted, happy young teens, that's just such a huge blessing. I wouldn't want to risk regression from living in the ps high school fish bowl, when if left OUT of it, the young man would be nearly grown here in the adult world, having just skipped all that garbage. So that's my decision for my kid.

I don't know that all ps is bad, bad, bad, of course. Might be a lot better where you are. Maybe theater is very awesome, maybe there's an lgbt club with teacher support, etc. But I like what a pp said about letting your son know there's an off ramp if it's not wonderful and he starts to feel suffocated. That seems really important for a young person to know.

 

I actually really appreciate this post, it’s given me a few things to think and check in with Ds about. And I don’t mind unsolicited advice at all, so feel free to lay it on me. 

 

We live deep in the suburbs, and have do have quite a few activities and opportunities out here. We’re 60-90 minutes (crazy traffic) away from a large city with endless options. I’d drive him there every day if I could, but I’m just not going to be able to make that happen this year.

 

I think what made me always consider public school the most likely option for DS is that he’s by far the most social of our kids. Our older boys would have been happy with a few close friends, but each ended up having a large social circle the high school years, mostly formed through sports. Ds dislikes most team sports, and has never gotten much socially out of his music and dance classes. Joining a competitive cheerleading team in 6th grade made a huge difference for him because it gave him a ready-made social group, but he’s decided to give up cheerleading this year. A pre-professional dance program, which we have nearby, could probably replicate this if he wanted to devote that much time to dance.

 

Theatre is not very popular where we live. The options are one children’s/youth theatre program (rehearses once a week, doesn’t produce high-quality performances), two community theatre companies (very political, may or may not have roles for teens), and the public school.

 

I really get what you’re saying about skipping the whole high school stage. It is appealing.

 

 

I think Dh, Ds and I are all considering this a one-year commitment, so I’m a little surprised that several posters mentioned making sure that Ds knows he doesn’t have to stick it out in public school if it doesn’t go well. Definitely something we’ll have to talk about this week!

 

 

 

For the most part he is right.  Students will be accepting.   Now, he may get a teacher or two who is older and less accepting.  I am a school counselor in a somewhat rural suburb of a large city in NC and in the interview I was asked THREE questions about working with LGBT students.  I was surprised.  I wasn't even asked that in the city school interviews. They said that they have had a lot of students, but their biggest issue is with some of the staff (older, set in their ways, etc...)

 

And if he already has friends who attend, he knows more of their culture.

 

As for the academics, I don't know what it is like there, but here, if the parents request a higher level (pre-AP, AP, etc...) the student can automatically get in from a homeschooling background.  When my middle son went to high school for the first time in 10th grade, we requested 2 honors classes, they put him in, no questions asked.  He has done fine.  He has not taken any AP, but that is his own choice and we haven't really pushed it.  He is a great kid and smart, but he is my "[path of least resistance" kid and quite honestly, doesn't care if it takes him the full 4 years to finish college, he would actually prefer that.  He is quite social and likes to take his time.  We are fine with that.

 

 

Thanks for sharing your experience with this.  I don’t think Ds will be upset at all by an older teacher who’s stuck in his or her ways. I was thinking more about the male students talking badly about him, or even avoiding/ignoring him. 

 

All but two of friends are cheerleaders, so his sample is a little biased.  :lol:

 

We're also not in any rush for him to earn AP credits or finish college early. In a year or two, I expect that Ds will decide whether to take AP classes, but this time I think it's going to have to be a shared decision. If it were up to him, he'd probably ask his friends for their schedules and try to weasel his way into their classes.  

 

Before I even read your part about your son's orientation, I was going to say, "Make sure he knows the social landscape can have strange 'rules'". While I agree that the climate is better overall for LGBTQ students/people, it's not "nothing". My son (who is straight) was, I think, shocked and confused that things matter that he has never given thought to, like what kind of shoes one wears (they call it "Having shoe game"), what phones/devices you have, what activities you do. And this was private school!

My son is tall, good-looking and good at sports and music. I think he was so used to social acceptance being a total non-issue, it was shocking to him to realize he was "not cool like Garrett," for example. And I'm looking at this supposedly A-list cool guy and thinking, "What? This kid is the kingpin cool guy in the school? He's not even all that handsome!" 😄 But he did have ten pairs of $100+ shoes. And whatever the most recent iPhone was at the time. ðŸ˜

It's hard to predict what will matter to our kids if/when they enter school. My DD is older and was the first of our family to ever enter a school building. For her, I was alert to the fact that she might feel her clothes or things were not cool enough, because I think girls care about that more than guys. But it actually was not an issue for her. She did ask for certain things once she learned what brands and stores were cool (nothing outrageous, just things like a Vera Bradley backpack), but she very quickly was welcomed into a core group of girls who remained her group throughout and beyond high school. For my son, I didn't even realize guys might have these kind of rules, too, but DS was much more bothered that he didn't have cool things, and it was more difficult for him to settle into a group of friends.

 

I’m not even going to pretend to understand teenage social rules or what makes a high school student “coolâ€, but I think Ds is doing okay in this area and has managed to avoid most of the homeschooler stereotypes. He has an iPhone 6 and is active on social media. He keeps up with pop culture and listens to all different types of music. He spends most of his money on clothes, and has a pretty classic, inoffensive look. I just asked him how his “shoe game†is, and he responded, “It could use some work, if you’re paying.† :rolleyes:

 

I have a dd going into 10th grade in Texas.

 

Go for Pre-AP in Math and English if possible.  Those classes usually get the stronger teachers and the more 'dedicated' students.  My daughter chose to not take Pre-AP Biology and was thrilled with her 99% average in the 'regular' Biology course (she felt she actually had the better teacher-- now she wants to major in science!)-- she is scheduled for Pre-AP Chemistry this year...  Those are the only Pre-AP classes for 9th graders that our district offers.

 

Warning-- if you sign him up for Pre-AP English there is usually a 'summer assignment' that is tested on the first week so ask about this if you enroll him in this level.

 

Our small town is surprisingly accepting...

 

Don't worry too much about the endorsements-- just put "Theater" -- this will give him more of a priority for those classes.  (My daughter started with an 'Instrumental Music' endorsement last year and will most likely change it to science-- but I looked and it really does not matter as far as her course selection goes until her Sr year..

 

Thanks for the tip about the endorsements, and your daughter’s experience!

 

Ds lucked out on the Pre-AP English assignment – the assignment is to choose one selection from a list, and he’s already read two of them. My proudest homeschool mom moment. 

 

In my experience (two kids who have done this so far) it takes into the Spring semester before they really find their little niche and feel they belong. So prepare for that. I warned Middle that it would take that long and over winter break she was freaking out that she still didn't have friends and I said to give it another month or two and that's exactly what happened.

 

You might find that your son is right and that his generation, for the most part, is "over it." Oldest has encountered some outspoken homophobes but they are the minority and she's good at dismissing them from her mind. It's a good skill to have. Otherwise, she's never encountered any real bullying. I also share concerns that her teen years have her living in this protected little bubble, but at the same time, I have no desire to burst it. She's not out to family members who would be judgemental, or at least if they are, they certainly keep it to themselves. `

 

This is why I was thinking we needed a one-year commitment starting out. My two college students took until the second semester to find their footing and make real connections, so I feel like high school would be the same?

 

So far, Ds has only gotten comments from strangers and acquaintances, which he’s been able to get over pretty quickly. I think it would be a lot harder if he had to see the same jerk (teacher or student) in class every day. 

 

I can relate - my oldest 2 kids (son and daughter) went to public hs after being homeschooled K-8th.

 

Some tips:

 

1.  You want him to be in the accelerated classes.  I was concerned that advanced geometry would be too difficult for dd with the whole transition to new school anxiety, but after the first day of class, she told me, "Mom, the kids in class talk the entire time the teacher's talking.  They really don't care about class or the teacher.  They're so rude, and I can't hear what the teacher's saying."  I switched her out immediately, and she was fine in the advanced course.  She had to take World Civ when all the other advanced kids were taking an AP psych class (bc she was hsed and didn't have teacher approval for the AP class).  She was miserable.  Teacher was always in a bad mood bc other kids in class were obnoxious.  All that to say, the accel. classes aren't much more difficult and the quality of kids/learning in the higher classes is worth it.

 

2.  Check to see if your school has a gay student alliance club.  They are very supportive.  I agree with your son - you might be surprised how much more open and accepting this generation of kids is compared to our generation.  My husband teaches at local middle school, and he's always talking about how nice kids are these days.  ** Very encouraging, and we live in south in very conservative school district.

 

3.  Before first day, take him to school and walk with him through his schedule.  This was very helpful for my kids to know where classes were located and how day would "work".

 

4.  Have him practice combination lock for locker.

 

If I think of anything else, I'll let you know.  Please pm me if you have any specific questions.  It has been a good experience for both kids!

 

Wow, this is encouraging! And yes, I already asked if we would be allowed to wander around the school after our meeting on Monday, and the secretary said she'd have a map ready for us. :)

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I’ve spent all evening poring over the course catalog, 9th grade parent packet, and a PowerPoint the school put together about course selection. I understand what’s available and what’s required, but I’m not sure where Ds fits.

 

1) There are no “honors†classes. The core 9th/10th grade classes have three tracks - applied/foundational, regular, and Pre-AP. Where does a bright kid without any real interest in academics fall?

 

Is there anything I should know about choosing courses, or anything you wish you’d known? This school requires that students take 7 credits in 9th grade, and doesn’t use block scheduling.  

 

I'm think the academics will fall into place. Ds does care about electives (theatre, music, dance, creative writing, art, PE) and will have strong opinions in that area, so I'm hoping the counsellor can help guide is in the right direction for the core courses. 

 

2) I haven't even started worrying about the social side of high school. Ds is a tall, handsome, likeable, confident kid, and I think he’ll be fine socially in the long run, but I do think his expectations are too high starting out. First off, he has a bunch of friends at this school, but they’re all older than he is. I’m not sure that it’ll be as easy as he thinks it will be to hang out with them and be accepted by their other friends.

 

3) More worrying for me is that he’s gay, has no interest in keeping it under wraps, and might not have the life experience to handle other kids' or the staff's reactions. He hasn't been "sheltered" in the traditional sense, but he and the rest of our family definitely gravitate toward people and groups that are exceptionally accepting. One of his reasons for wanting to attend school is to get involved in theatre and make friends that share this interest, and I think he’s envisioning High School Musical. When I asked him if he thought anyone at this school would bully kids who are gay or into theatre, he completely blew me off: “Mom, it’s 2017.†I reminded him that we live in Texas and not to expect everyone to be as accepting as they are in the cheerleading, theatre, and social media worlds. Still, he thinks his generation is “over itâ€. 

 

4) Ds has never been to school at all, and has never even taken an outsourced academic class, so I’m sure I’ll have to help him get organized and develop a system/routine for keeping up with his assignments. Any tips for this transition?

 

5) Any advice for getting him ready to begin school next week?

 

Any words of wisdom for me? I usually have months to stress over big transitions, but I’m sure good at cramming it all into a few days when I have to!

 

 

1) I also have a bright kid, but who is not particularly interested in academics.  I suggest you talk with your son about this. What he wants to do and what he will be willing to do.  Also find out what the school policies are in terms of moving up or down in track placement.  They may decide to test him or otherwise place him themselves.  But if he will not do work enough to do well in pre-AP track there is not much point in him being placed in it even if he theoretically can be.

 

eta after seeing your course possibilty list: if he does want to do some pre-AP level, see if you can find out what will have best teachers and choose by that, or choose by area of greatest interest of your ds, or even, let him choose by what his friends will be in if there is a reasonable fit for his own needs.  For electives, I'd suggest one theater class and get that health credit out of the way. What about required PE?

 

2) activities (in my ds's case particularly sports) helped to make a transition and to fit in to b&m school.  He is with different groups at different times. Sometimes he is with friends from an activity even if younger or older, sometimes with his own classmates. 

 

3) I tend to agree with your ds. It's 2017.  My son is not gay, so maybe I am missing some issues that remain, but so far as I can tell it is not a problem any more. Who is with whom and who broke up with whom seems to be out in the open whether it is David and Lisa or David and John  or Lisa and Susan (except now it is more likely different names, like Dylan and Emma or Dylan and Tyler or Emma and Cassie). We are in a rural area, btw, with a mix of more liberal and more conservative people, and it still does not seem to be a problem.  I am aware of some bullying in my ds's school and that of other teens we know, but the "reasons" do not seem to be due to someone being gay or into theater.  But you could maybe ask the principal about this if you are feeling anxious about it for your ds and his particular school.

 

 

4) organization: This was our biggest issue last year and I expect it will still be this next year.  I hope others will have answers!

 

5) make sure he is getting to bed and up on a good schedule for school. Figure out breakfasts that will work and other logistics. Make sure you are clear on what time they are supposed to arrive and where he is supposed to go on first day.  Check out how long it takes to get to the school or bus or whatever he needs to get to in advance and leave plenty of time plus a little extra.

 

Edited by Pen
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adding: as to what pre-AP classes, also think about which APs if any, he would/should likely ultimately take.  EG--If he is going toward STEM then perhaps pre-AP math and science. If more toward humanities then maybe pre-AP English and Geography.

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I am a science teacher at a public high school in Texas. I would recommend pre-AP for English, math, and science. If he really likes history, then I would do pre-AP for that as well.

 

The reason I'm pushing for pre-AP is because of the behavior problems you see in the regular classes.

 

The kids in the pre-AP classes are generally working hard and participating. 

 

In the on-level classes, you have all the kids who are behavior problems and all the kids who are just marking time until they are able to drop out and all the kids who don't care at all. You also get kids who really are trying, but the teachers don't have as much time to work with them because of all the other kids who are working hard at showing off for the class so everybody will think they are funny instead of thinking they are stupid. Most kids would far rather be known as the class clown than as the kid who needs help.

 

I work hard to reach all of the kids in my classes, but I had several kids who could have done pre-AP and chose to take on-level instead because they were worried that they would be overloaded. Every single one of those kids regretted taking on-level instead of pre-AP. The on-level classes have a completely different atmosphere from the pre-AP classes. It's not the teacher that's different. It's the students.

 

Make sure that your son signs up for every teacher's Remind and you should also. If any of his teachers use google classroom, make sure that you get on that too if it's an option. If any of his teachers use ClassDojo, make sure to sign up for the parent side. Keep up with his grades online. This is all new for him. He's going to need help.

 

At my school, all teachers are required to have two morning tutorials and two afternoon tutorials every week. Also, at my school, you can go to any teacher in the department for help with assignments. It drives me nuts when my students come for help only after failing the test. 

 

My school also requires all freshmen and sophomores to attend study hall Monday-Thursday. At my school, this is the first 30 minutes of each schoolday. Juniors and Seniors are only assigned to study hall if they still haven't passed one of their end-of-course exams. Student assigned to study hall who do not attend are marked absent and have to make up those hours.

 

As a side note, I would be astonished if they actually give him credit for the courses you completed in homeschool. Generally they require you to take a CBE test to show mastery. I am quite certain they will require the end of course STAAR exam for Algebra I as well.

 

The state legislature passed a new ruling that you cannot take Geometry until you have passed Algebra I, so unless they can very quickly get him tested to get credit for Algebra I, they will probably enroll him in Algebra I. In that case, he should definitely take the pre-AP level. I don't think taking German II without credit for German I will be an issue because that is not one of the tested subjects. Tested subjects are English I, English II, Algebra I, Biology, and US History.

As a side note, I will be astonished if they give him credit for any of the high school courses he has already completed through homeschool without taking the CBE for it. They will likely require him to take the Algebra I end of course exam also.

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1) I also have a bright kid, but who is not particularly interested in academics.  I suggest you talk with your son about this. What he wants to do and what he will be willing to do.  Also find out what the school policies are in terms of moving up or down in track placement.  They may decide to test him or otherwise place him themselves.  But if he will not do work enough to do well in pre-AP track there is not much point in him being placed in it even if he theoretically can be.

 

eta after seeing your course possibilty list: if he does want to do some pre-AP level, see if you can find out what will have best teachers and choose by that, or choose by area of greatest interest of your ds, or even, let him choose by what his friends will be in if there is a reasonable fit for his own needs.  For electives, I'd suggest one theater class and get that health credit out of the way. What about required PE?

 

2) activities (in my ds's case particularly sports) helped to make a transition and to fit in to b&m school.  He is with different groups at different times. Sometimes he is with friends from an activity even if younger or older, sometimes with his own classmates. 

 

3) I tend to agree with your ds. It's 2017.  My son is not gay, so maybe I am missing some issues that remain, but so far as I can tell it is not a problem any more. Who is with whom and who broke up with whom seems to be out in the open whether it is David and Lisa or David and John  or Lisa and Susan (except now it is more likely different names, like Dylan and Emma or Dylan and Tyler or Emma and Cassie). We are in a rural area, btw, with a mix of more liberal and more conservative people, and it still does not seem to be a problem.  I am aware of some bullying in my ds's school and that of other teens we know, but the "reasons" do not seem to be due to someone being gay or into theater.  But you could maybe ask the principal about this if you are feeling anxious about it for your ds and his particular school.

 

 

4) organization: This was our biggest issue last year and I expect it will still be this next year.  I hope others will have answers!

 

5) make sure he is getting to bed and up on a good schedule for school. Figure out breakfasts that will work and other logistics. Make sure you are clear on what time they are supposed to arrive and where he is supposed to go on first day.  Check out how long it takes to get to the school or bus or whatever he needs to get to in advance and leave plenty of time plus a little extra.

 

 
Hmm. I don’t think he’ll refuse to do the work once he’s actually registered for a class. But, this is all new for us and he could very well surprise me, especially if he doesn’t care for the teacher or doesn’t care about their opinion of him. I’ll get as much info as I can from the guidance counselor as I can, and I’ve also suggested to Ds that he ask a few friends if there are any especially good or bad teachers to watch out for. 
 
Ds was excited to see that Dance counts as a PE credit. He’s also considering the cross-country team, depending on practice times, which means that I have to get him a sport physical this week.
 
Getting Health over with seemed obvious to me, but it’s listed as is a 1/2 credit course and I don’t see any other 1/2 credit courses available to 9th graders. And Ds just told me that his friends say everyone takes Health in the summer. Great. 
 
Organization. We’ll work on that. 

 

 

I am a science teacher at a public high school in Texas. I would recommend pre-AP for English, math, and science. If he really likes history, then I would do pre-AP for that as well.

 

The reason I'm pushing for pre-AP is because of the behavior problems you see in the regular classes.

 

The kids in the pre-AP classes are generally working hard and participating. 

 

In the on-level classes, you have all the kids who are behavior problems and all the kids who are just marking time until they are able to drop out and all the kids who don't care at all. You also get kids who really are trying, but the teachers don't have as much time to work with them because of all the other kids who are working hard at showing off for the class so everybody will think they are funny instead of thinking they are stupid. Most kids would far rather be known as the class clown than as the kid who needs help.

 

I work hard to reach all of the kids in my classes, but I had several kids who could have done pre-AP and chose to take on-level instead because they were worried that they would be overloaded. Every single one of those kids regretted taking on-level instead of pre-AP. The on-level classes have a completely different atmosphere from the pre-AP classes. It's not the teacher that's different. It's the students.

 

Make sure that your son signs up for every teacher's Remind and you should also. If any of his teachers use google classroom, make sure that you get on that too if it's an option. If any of his teachers use ClassDojo, make sure to sign up for the parent side. Keep up with his grades online. This is all new for him. He's going to need help.

 

At my school, all teachers are required to have two morning tutorials and two afternoon tutorials every week. Also, at my school, you can go to any teacher in the department for help with assignments. It drives me nuts when my students come for help only after failing the test. 

 

My school also requires all freshmen and sophomores to attend study hall Monday-Thursday. At my school, this is the first 30 minutes of each schoolday. Juniors and Seniors are only assigned to study hall if they still haven't passed one of their end-of-course exams. Student assigned to study hall who do not attend are marked absent and have to make up those hours.

 

As a side note, I would be astonished if they actually give him credit for the courses you completed in homeschool. Generally they require you to take a CBE test to show mastery. I am quite certain they will require the end of course STAAR exam for Algebra I as well.

 

The state legislature passed a new ruling that you cannot take Geometry until you have passed Algebra I, so unless they can very quickly get him tested to get credit for Algebra I, they will probably enroll him in Algebra I. In that case, he should definitely take the pre-AP level. I don't think taking German II without credit for German I will be an issue because that is not one of the tested subjects. Tested subjects are English I, English II, Algebra I, Biology, and US History.

As a side note, I will be astonished if they give him credit for any of the high school courses he has already completed through homeschool without taking the CBE for it. They will likely require him to take the Algebra I end of course exam also.

 

 

Okay, avoiding the behavioral stuff might be enough to motivate Ds to take the tougher classes.

 

It doesn’t look like there’s a study hall built into the schedule, but I’ll inquire about tutorials if they aren’t announced. I’m always on my college kids to make use of their professors’ office hours, and with Ds I’ll have the added tool of being his ride home.

 

I came away from my conversation with the secretary with the impression that it would be up to someone at the school whether Ds would have to take any tests, but this actually makes more sense. Ds has no problem sitting for these two exams, we’ve just got to hope now that the school will be able to offer them some time next week.

 

And am I right that there’s nothing we can do about STAAR exam until it’s offered in the spring?

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From a different system - wow you have a lot of choices. At the nearest high school to me kids get one half year elective in their first year and I think 2 in their second. Also have you checked that at this late date their are spaces in the classes he wants to take?

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Okay, avoiding the behavioral stuff might be enough to motivate Ds to take the tougher classes.

 

It doesn’t look like there’s a study hall built into the schedule, but I’ll inquire about tutorials if they aren’t announced. I’m always on my college kids to make use of their professors’ office hours, and with Ds I’ll have the added tool of being his ride home.

 

I came away from my conversation with the secretary with the impression that it would be up to someone at the school whether Ds would have to take any tests, but this actually makes more sense. Ds has no problem sitting for these two exams, we’ve just got to hope now that the school will be able to offer them some time next week.

 

And am I right that there’s nothing we can do about STAAR exam until it’s offered in the spring?

 

 

Each of the STAAR exams is offered 3x/year.

 

English I - 12/4, 4/10, and 6/25

English II - 12/6, 4/12, and 6/27

Algebra I, Biology, US History (given on a range, each school district sets their own date within the range) - 12/4-12/8, 5/7-5/11, 6/25-6/29

 

Just because of the behavioral issue, I recommend any student who can handle the academics of a pre-AP class to opt for that level.

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. He’s also considering the cross-country team, depending on practice times, which means that I have to get him a sport physical this week.
 
 
Organization. We’ll work on that. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don't know if this would be similar at other schools, but for my ds, cross-country is his best activity for social / friendships.  As well, the cross-country kids seem to look out for each other and helped one team member who was having some problems with being bullied or falling in with wrong groups last year.

 

If you get good ideas on organization let me know!  

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For foreign language, the private schools we spoke to left it to their respective foreign language teachers to do placement tests. It is because heritage speakers have managed to place into Spanish 3 or AP Spanish in 9th grade while Chinese heritage speakers can place anywhere from Chinese 1 to AP Chinese due to writing skills.

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From a different system - wow you have a lot of choices. At the nearest high school to me kids get one half year elective in their first year and I think 2 in their second. Also have you checked that at this late date their are spaces in the classes he wants to take?

 

I actually thought there would be a few more choices for science/social studies, but it looks like Biology is required for all 9th graders and World Geography is the only social studies course open to them. Definitely lots of choices for electives though. Two of Ds's friends went in on Friday morning to change their course selections and were able to get all of the classes they asked for, so I'm hopeful that Ds will be able to get at least most of what he wants. 

 

Each of the STAAR exams is offered 3x/year.

 

English I - 12/4, 4/10, and 6/25

English II - 12/6, 4/12, and 6/27

Algebra I, Biology, US History (given on a range, each school district sets their own date within the range) - 12/4-12/8, 5/7-5/11, 6/25-6/29

 

Just because of the behavioral issue, I recommend any student who can handle the academics of a pre-AP class to opt for that level.

 

Thanks!

 

I don't know if this would be similar at other schools, but for my ds, cross-country is his best activity for social / friendships.  As well, the cross-country kids seem to look out for each other and helped one team member who was having some problems with being bullied or falling in with wrong groups last year.

 

If you get good ideas on organization let me know!  

 

I've heard that cross-country attracts a really nice group of kids.

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I don't know if this would be similar at other schools, but for my ds, cross-country is his best activity for social / friendships. As well, the cross-country kids seem to look out for each other and helped one team member who was having some problems with being bullied or falling in with wrong groups last year.

 

If you get good ideas on organization let me know!

Cross country is a nice inclusive sport at my school, too.

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After a full morning at the school, we have one very excited kid and an even more relieved mother!

 

I am so, so impressed with Ds's guidance counsellor. I just wrote him a thank you e-mail, which I had Ds look over to make sure it didn't sound like I was hitting on him. We met for almost an hour, he was able to answer all of our questions, and gave us a lot of information that we didn't even know to ask for. He's also young and cool, and I'm sure Ds will feel comfortable going to him if there are any issues. 

 

He echoed most of the advice you all shared with me, and convinced Ds that the Pre-AP classes will be a better fit for him. So, math, English, biology, and world geography will all be Pre-AP. 

 

He called one of the math teachers in to discuss placement and look over what Ds has already done in math. Ds has to take the Algebra 1 CBE on Wednesday after school, but they went ahead and registered him for this teacher's Pre-AP Geometry class anyway. If he scores less than 80% on the test, he'll be moved into Pre-AP Algebra 1.

 

The French teacher wasn't available today, and they don't have a French 1 CBE, so they registered him for French 2. The French teacher will look over the French 1 packet I put together, interview Ds or give him a placement test if she feels it's necessary, and decide whether he should be moved back to French 1. 

 

For electives, Theatre was a given, but Ds decided against taking the Dance class he'd been excited about. He heard negative things about the class from his friends, and the decision was made easier for him when the guidance counsellor looked up the class list and saw that no boys had registered for yet. Instead, Ds opted to take a regular PE class. 

 

The guidance counsellor encouraged us to drop in and speak with the theatre teacher/director before we left, and I am so glad we did! Auditions for the fall musical start this Thursday after school, and Ds has been preparing since we got home.

 

Tomorrow, we shop for PE clothes. It's going to be a busy week!

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Sounds like a great beginning! 

 

I hope your ds is right about orientation and gender issues not being, well, issues. I'd try to ask around a bit - I know he has friends there, but I'd worry a bit that they are presenting the comforting view, not the actual one. I'm in the liberal part of Louisiana, right outside of New Orleans. While most kids have many friends and few problems, I don't think there's any school where I'd say they are likely to encounter ZERO problems. My dd (who homeschools) hangs out with a crowd with lots of non-conforming kids. They have friends, they have activities . . . and they have at least some problems in the school setting. I'm sorry for stereotyping Texas, but it's hard to imagine it's not the same there. 

 

Haters gonna hate, can't change that, but I do think it's good to be prepared practically and psychologically. He sounds like a kid who will handle it well, but it's better not to be caught by surprise. 

 

My only tip will make you laugh: Make sure he knows how to operate a locker!! One of my kids had never operated a combination lock when she attended a brick and mortar school for the first time!!! Oops!

Anne

 

My dd is annoyed that schools call them combination locks when they are really permutation locks. She feels it adds to the endless confusion that is math class, lol. 

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Whether or not LGBT is an issue depends heavily on the school: the students, the teachers, and the administration. At my school, we definitely have some students who are homophobic, but for the most part, have not had issues with LGBT students getting harassed. There have been some issues, but the kids who are homophobic are the ones who are seen as the problem by the other students. The teachers and the administration stand with the LGBT students, so we haven't had issues like I know some schools have. However, I know this is not the case at all schools. And I'm sure there are some teachers who are problematical. There are some at every school, no matter how they try to screen them out with interviews. It makes a big difference if the teachers who are a problem have to try to hide that they are bigoted rather than being able to be openly bigoted.

 

 

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Sounds like a great beginning! 

 

I hope your ds is right about orientation and gender issues not being, well, issues. I'd try to ask around a bit - I know he has friends there, but I'd worry a bit that they are presenting the comforting view, not the actual one. I'm in the liberal part of Louisiana, right outside of New Orleans. While most kids have many friends and few problems, I don't think there's any school where I'd say they are likely to encounter ZERO problems. My dd (who homeschools) hangs out with a crowd with lots of non-conforming kids. They have friends, they have activities . . . and they have at least some problems in the school setting. I'm sorry for stereotyping Texas, but it's hard to imagine it's not the same there. 

 

Haters gonna hate, can't change that, but I do think it's good to be prepared practically and psychologically. He sounds like a kid who will handle it well, but it's better not to be caught by surprise. 

 

 

My dd is annoyed that schools call them combination locks when they are really permutation locks. She feels it adds to the endless confusion that is math class, lol. 

 

Thanks, I also had a hard time believing that there aren't any issues at all. When I spoke to Ds further about this, he admitted that his friends have told him of issues coming up with trans kids, but not with gay kids specifically. From my conversation with the guidance counsellor and what we've heard from friends I do feel reassured that any outright bullying or harassment would be dealt with appropriately by the school. Ds is quite sensitive about what people think of him, so I think we have to expect and prepare for some minor issues to come up. Today, when we were shopping for PE clothes, I overheard Ds asking Ds18 about locker room protocol. So, he's definitely thinking ahead. 

 

Whether or not LGBT is an issue depends heavily on the school: the students, the teachers, and the administration. At my school, we definitely have some students who are homophobic, but for the most part, have not had issues with LGBT students getting harassed. There have been some issues, but the kids who are homophobic are the ones who are seen as the problem by the other students. The teachers and the administration stand with the LGBT students, so we haven't had issues like I know some schools have. However, I know this is not the case at all schools. And I'm sure there are some teachers who are problematical. There are some at every school, no matter how they try to screen them out with interviews. It makes a big difference if the teachers who are a problem have to try to hide that they are bigoted rather than being able to be openly bigoted.

 

Thanks for sharing this, I do get the same sense from this school. They had an LGBT club for several years, and have teachers interested in sponsoring/overseeing the club if any students are interested in leading it. 

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