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Infant left in a car today.


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Local news-a woman left her infant in the car while she shopped for an hour. It is mid-80's today. She was arrested and claims she had no idea it was dangerous. Assuming no mental deficiencies, is it possible, in 2017, to have no clue that that is dangerous??

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Sure, I suppose it's possible. There are things that come up on this forum all the time that I'm shocked someone doesn't know. However, that said, it's possible but not probable, imo.

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They should test her mental competence.  I suppose it is possible but it would be very unusual.

 

You don't have to pass an IQ test (or a psychological assessment) to be a mom.  So there have been some really dumb things done because some parents truly do not know better.

 

Is the baby going to be OK?

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Local news-a woman left her infant in the car while she shopped for an hour. It is mid-80's today. She was arrested and claims she had no idea it was dangerous. Assuming no mental deficiencies, is it possible, in 2017, to have no clue that that is dangerous??

Did the baby die?

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Well, every time I walk into one of the local Walmarts, I marvel that there is a stick-figure sign on the entry door to the store, reminding parents not to leave babies in the car. I always think, "How is it possible that there needs to be a sign mentioning this?

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Well considering how often I see people advertising baby furniture with CRAP positioned where the baby should go... I guess anything is possible. Every.single.time I'm like do people not know you shouldn't shove blankets and stuffed animals in the crib?! I mean, I might give people a pass on outdated bumpers figuring they don't know about the mesh kind or dangers, but even those kinda rub me the wrong way. Dh's boss gave me a quilt as a baby gift. I said thank you and she talked about how I could put it in the crib. I didn't want to get into a whole thing with her so I just said it would be a great quilt for tummy time. Then she reminded me or for the crib. :001_huh: More like for the toddler bed.

 

I see it on TV a lot. I see babies forward facing in TV shows. I want to have a talk with the director or producer or someone everyone I see this. The tv sho Grandfathered? They had the child forward facing in a car with the top down. Maybe to emphasis that the guy was clueless with kids... but... eh.

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Well, every time I walk into one of the local Walmarts, I marvel that there is a stick-figure sign on the entry door to the store, reminding parents not to leave babies in the car. I always think, "How is it possible that there needs to be a sign mentioning this?

 

 

Well that I completely understand.  Most people who leave their small kids in the car (I hope, hope, hope) don't do it deliberately but because they've forgotten the child was with them or something.  In that case, it makes sense that maybe the sign will jolt their memory.

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Well, every time I walk into one of the local Walmarts, I marvel that there is a stick-figure sign on the entry door to the store, reminding parents not to leave babies in the car. I always think, "How is it possible that there needs to be a sign mentioning this?

 

I just assume that people who do this are out of their routine. Maybe not normally in charge of transporting the child. So it's a good reminder.

 

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I forgot about those signs. This incident happened at WM. I guess that blows her defense.

 

I've been to WM a few times in the past few weeks. I only recall seeing that sign once. It might only be at certain entrances or certain WMs. Like, it was on the Market side of the store but maybe it wasn't on the Pharmacy side (or whatever dept. is on the left at any given WM).

 

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Well considering how often I see people advertising baby furniture with CRAP positioned where the baby should go... I guess anything is possible. Every.single.time I'm like do people not know you shouldn't shove blankets and stuffed animals in the crib?! I mean, I might give people a pass on outdated bumpers figuring they don't know about the mesh kind or dangers, but even those kinda rub me the wrong way. Dh's boss gave me a quilt as a baby gift. I said thank you and she talked about how I could put it in the crib. I didn't want to get into a whole thing with her so I just said it would be a great quilt for tummy time. Then she reminded me or for the crib. :001_huh: More like for the toddler bed.

 

I see it on TV a lot. I see babies forward facing in TV shows. I want to have a talk with the director or producer or someone everyone I see this. The tv sho Grandfathered? They had the child forward facing in a car with the top down. Maybe to emphasis that the guy was clueless with kids... but... eh.

 

As soon as a baby is capable of lifting its own head, it is safe for the baby to sleep with stuffies and blankets.  For many babies, that is very shortly after they are born.

 

Before that, it is still safe if you manage it so the blankie doesn't cover the baby's head etc.

 

What's unsafe is using nasty dirty smoke-filled or mildewy mattresses, smoking in the room where the baby needs to breathe, giving cough/cold medicine before a certain age ....  These have all been proven to increase the risk of "SIDS." whereas teddy bears and baby quilts have not.  :)

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I don't recall ever seeing a sign at Walmart about not leaving your baby in the car, stick figure or otherwise. Not in WNY and not in TX either. But I can also be very good at not paying attention to signs and ads and all that kind of stuff. 

 

Anyway, I agree it'd be exceedingly unlikely she didn't know it could be dangerous. 

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I think it is definitely possible.  Especially if she is in her early 20s and if it is her first child.

 

A young person may not listen to the news, or listen to the radio.  They may stream all their music/TV/movies, so they don't get the normal exposure. They aren't going to necessarily pay attention to billboards, brochures or other people talking about babies/children and related dangers, until they have a child themselves and if it was an infant....she hasn't had much time to absorb it. It is especially likely if she has heard/seen others doing the same.  

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I have done at least 20 weddings where certain people feel the need to put Pepsi/ Coke in baby bottles... where children as young as five smoke... so I think she may be part of a subculture where she might not know such a thing. 

 

I have a friend whose sister was extremely sleep deprived and left her infant in the car under unusual circumstances while she was shopping. It was in Oregon, it was not a hot day, she didn't go to jail and kept custody of her kids. It was a mistake when she did it, she simply "forgot" she had the baby with her. The baby fell asleep in the car on the way to the store and since he was in the back seat, she saw she was parked next to an old friend, got out to talk to the friend before shopping, and went shopping without the baby. 

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My SIL's in-laws (from another country and culture) are firmly against the idea that anyone, including children and babies, needs a seatbelt.  They just think it is total safety overkill.  It's not that they're not aware of the danger, exactly - they just assess it as not enough risk to justify the trouble.

 

Perhaps this is something similar.  I mean, we all have varying levels of risk we find acceptable - if one were being *really* cautious, one wouldn't take her kids anywhere unnecessary in the car, ever.  The kid wouldn't go to Walmart.  The same person might not be willing to leave her 12 year old in a car in the parking lot.  These people (not wearing seatbelts, leaving a baby in a hot car for an hour) are on the other end of the spectrum, and obviously way too far towards not averting danger for current social norms.

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Leaving the entire issue of children aside...Hasn't she ever, herself, gotten into a car on a summer day?  Surely she knows how hot the seats and steering wheel get.

 

I can't believe anyone who drives in the area wouldn't know it gets hot inside a car on a mid-80 degree day.

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As soon as a baby is capable of lifting its own head, it is safe for the baby to sleep with stuffies and blankets. For many babies, that is very shortly after they are born.

 

Before that, it is still safe if you manage it so the blankie doesn't cover the baby's head etc.

 

What's unsafe is using nasty dirty smoke-filled or mildewy mattresses, smoking in the room where the baby needs to breathe, giving cough/cold medicine before a certain age .... These have all been proven to increase the risk of "SIDS." whereas teddy bears and baby quilts have not. :)

I'm too lazy to track down any research, instead I will quote the standpoint of the American Acsdemy of Pediatrics

 

"While infants are at heightened risk for SIDS between the ages 1 and 4 months, new evidence shows that soft bedding continues to pose hazards to babies who are 4 months and older."

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/pages/american-academy-of-pediatrics-announces-new-safe-sleep-recommendations-to-protect-against-sids.aspx

 

Not that I (nor my uncircumcised son) live by their word, but that's an official medical statement. I will say that I have never in my previous perusal of published research papers, seen that cough/cold medicine is linked to SIDS.

 

Eta: I vaguely recall it was ok for blankets and such when baby could roll

Edited by Ailaena
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I'm too lazy to track down any research, instead I will quote the standpoint of the American Acsdemy of Pediatrics

 

"While infants are at heightened risk for SIDS between the ages 1 and 4 months, new evidence shows that soft bedding continues to pose hazards to babies who are 4 months and older."

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/pages/american-academy-of-pediatrics-announces-new-safe-sleep-recommendations-to-protect-against-sids.aspx

 

Not that I (nor my uncircumcised son) live by their word, but that's an official medical statement. I will say that I have never in my previous perusal of published research papers, seen that cough/cold medicine is linked to SIDS.

 

Eta: I vaguely recall it was ok for blankets and such when baby could roll

 

Funny you linked that, since recently they have backed off on the recommendation to keep babies in the parents' room, now saying babies sleep better in a separate room.

 

Not sure what "evidence" they have, they don't say, but I've studied this issue for decades.  SIDS has long been blamed on the wrong things, to the detriment of infant sleep and development.

 

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I once drove straight to my office instead of preschool. I had a stressful day and I was already thinking about what I had to do that day. My older daughter was 2 and said "Why are we here?"

 

If she hadn't. Well, I can't think about that. But Thank God she did.

 

Now, intentionally? Hard to believe someone is that dumb.

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When I went to our local Kroger, they had a bucket of water bottles on ice just inside the entrance. A sign encouraged customers to take one in the hot weather and reminded people not to forget kids or animals in their vehicle. Simple but hopefully effective.

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Local news-a woman left her infant in the car while she shopped for an hour. It is mid-80's today. She was arrested and claims she had no idea it was dangerous. Assuming no mental deficiencies, is it possible, in 2017, to have no clue that that is dangerous??

 

I don't know how anyone living at any point in time where there are vehicles with doors and windows could have no clue that this would be dangerous.

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Local news-a woman left her infant in the car while she shopped for an hour. It is mid-80's today. She was arrested and claims she had no idea it was dangerous. Assuming no mental deficiencies, is it possible, in 2017, to have no clue that that is dangerous??

 

I doubt it, but it is a really good excuse and used successfully by loads of people. She's smart enough to claim ignorance and hope to get away with it. 

 

If she doesn't know the laws of safe driving and automobile use, then she shouldn't have a license. And if she can't drive a vehicle, there are fewer chances she'll harm her child again, and others on the road. 

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I'm too lazy to track down any research, instead I will quote the standpoint of the American Acsdemy of Pediatrics

 

"While infants are at heightened risk for SIDS between the ages 1 and 4 months, new evidence shows that soft bedding continues to pose hazards to babies who are 4 months and older."

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/pages/american-academy-of-pediatrics-announces-new-safe-sleep-recommendations-to-protect-against-sids.aspx

 

Not that I (nor my uncircumcised son) live by their word, but that's an official medical statement. I will say that I have never in my previous perusal of published research papers, seen that cough/cold medicine is linked to SIDS.

 

Eta: I vaguely recall it was ok for blankets and such when baby could roll

 

Yes, this is a gripe of mine because I'm a quilter. When I give a quilt as a baby gift, I'm first of all very careful with the materials. I use very thin organic cotton batting or organic flannel and quilt it very densely so that it is more like a light blanket. I wash everything a certain way, and put a note that it is not to be used as a cover for the baby until they are a toddler.

 

Alas, there's a lady in my church who gives very puffy hand-tied quilts with polyester batting. I've brought it up with her, and she doesn't get it. Sigh!

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I've seen signs about not leaving a baby in the car at Walmarts in the south - Florida and Oklahoma - in the last year.  Never noticed one up North, but I wasn't especially looking for them either.

 

Yes, those signs are on our Wal-Mart and Target stores. Hopefully a few do indeed heed the reminder. although some just aren't thinking of their little ones. Even just riding in the car and doing errands, I used to worry about my babies getting too hot. I always took water for them and felt their legs frequently. If they seemed to be getting too hot, I'd go home.

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Since the baby was OK after allegedly sitting for an hour, I wonder if there is more to the story, e.g., was it really an hour of sitting alone in a car, was she in the shade with the windows down or whatever.  I couldn't find the news story using google.

 

The hour gives me a lot more pause than the 80 degrees, honestly.  Just seems to me you have to be asking for trouble if you do that - in any weather.

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I've researched the "child dies in hot car" area in great detail, and I've never found a single case where a child died after a parent knowingly left him in the car for a short errand.  In almost every case, the caregiver did not realize the child was in the car.  Then there were a few cases where the caregiver knowingly neglected / murdered the child(ren), and in those cases, the child was in the car for many hours.  So this story in the OP seems really unusual - though I guess maybe it happens and just doesn't make the news?

Edited by SKL
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I just assume that people who do this are out of their routine. Maybe not normally in charge of transporting the child. So it's a good reminder.

 

 

 

I have done at least 20 weddings where certain people feel the need to put Pepsi/ Coke in baby bottles... where children as young as five smoke... so I think she may be part of a subculture where she might not know such a thing. 

 

I have a friend whose sister was extremely sleep deprived and left her infant in the car under unusual circumstances while she was shopping. It was in Oregon, it was not a hot day, she didn't go to jail and kept custody of her kids. It was a mistake when she did it, she simply "forgot" she had the baby with her. The baby fell asleep in the car on the way to the store and since he was in the back seat, she saw she was parked next to an old friend, got out to talk to the friend before shopping, and went shopping without the baby. 

 

 

I once drove straight to my office instead of preschool. I had a stressful day and I was already thinking about what I had to do that day. My older daughter was 2 and said "Why are we here?"

 

If she hadn't. Well, I can't think about that. But Thank God she did.

 

Now, intentionally? Hard to believe someone is that dumb.

 

 

 

 

Add me to the list of people who have  had a close call.  Visiting family, DH and I decided to run to the bookstore.  I couldn't get the 18 month old (youngest of 2 kids at the time) to settle with my mom, so we left our older child with my mom and took the 18mo.  She was quiet as a mouse in the car, and when we arrived at the bookstore, the way my DH parked made it so I needed to walk around the back of the car rather than the front.  When I saw her in her carseat, I realized I had totally forgotten I was there.  If we had been able to park in a front row and I had not walked around the car...  *shudder*.  Now, I proceeded to have a total meltdown in the parking lot, and DH reassured me that HE had not forgotten she was in the car and would have of course gotten her out, but it didn't help.  I had totally forgotten her.  It was completely due to lack of routine- no older brother chatting, jet lag, sleep deprivation, going to a bookstore "alone" with DH then changing plans at the last minute...  

 

I shudder about it to this day.  

 

I absolutely believe accidents, even very tragic ones, can happen because I've lived through the experience of a near-miss.  But pleading total ignorance?  No way.  

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I absolutely believe accidents, even very tragic ones, can happen because I've lived through the experience of a near-miss.  But pleading total ignorance?  No way.  

 

Yes. I know a couple whose baby died when they left him in the car by accident. It was after a busy day of running errands. They had several young children. Mom thought Dad brought in the baby and put him in the crib. Dad thought Mom brought in the baby and put him in the crib. It was a few hours, I believe, before they discovered he wasn't in the crib.  :(

 

I don't know this couple super well, but from what I observed, they were among the most gentle, most doting, most loving parents I've ever seen. 

 

Their grief and guilt was something I can't even imagine experiencing.

 

But for the grace of God.

 

Please don't quote. I'm going to delete this later.

 

ETA: I googled the case to make sure I was remembering the details correctly, and it turns out it was a baby boy, not a baby girl, and they were out running errands beforehand, not at church. It just goes to show how faulty memory is at times.  :(

Edited by MercyA
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It's possible.  Not all that likely, but possible. 

 

Someone above mentioned certain subcultures - people tend to be aware more of what is current in their own social group and that really affects what they pay attention to.  If your family or friends do things a certain way, chances are you assume it is ok - you don't even think about it that much.

 

It seems like to those of us who are more aware, or live in places where it gets very hot, that it should be obvious - and yet it wasn't that long ago that it was pretty common to leave kids in cars in North America.  A lot of people still ignore the blanket in the crib thing, that is a really new one. 

 

Even car-seats, we forget how new this is, it's really a generation since they became a requirement,  and only the past 10 or 15 years since people began worrying seriously about things like forward or not, which brand is safest, booster seats, and so on.  I remember a discussion that started to get rather heated on a usually friendly parenting forum I belonged to, until one poster who lived in Thailand said "well, you probably will think I am awful, but I don't use a car-seat at all.  And it doesn't feel unsafe.  I just congratulate myself that I am not riding on a motor-scooter with a one year old hanging on behind!"

 

Given the other things I find people don't know, this would be no weirder.  Of course, it could also have been an excuse. 

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When I went to our local Kroger, they had a bucket of water bottles on ice just inside the entrance. A sign encouraged customers to take one in the hot weather and reminded people not to forget kids or animals in their vehicle. Simple but hopefully effective.

 

I suspect it isn't usually helpful.

 

They've done some studies of people who forget kids (and other things) this way.

 

Usually, it isn't just that they knew, and forgot.  They actually think the kid is somewhere else - with another parent, dropped off, at home.  In their mind, there is actually nothing to remember.

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I suspect it isn't usually helpful.

 

They've done some studies of people who forget kids (and other things) this way.

 

Usually, it isn't just that they knew, and forgot.  They actually think the kid is somewhere else - with another parent, dropped off, at home.  In their mind, there is actually nothing to remember.

 

The idea is that the reminder could help jog a person's mind out of the habit memory that made them lose awareness that the child was with them, in the same way that seeing a diaper bag might snap them out of it. Some car makers are developing child reminder systems for vehicles. More on habit memory here.

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I've seen signs about not leaving a baby in the car at Walmarts in the south - Florida and Oklahoma - in the last year.  Never noticed one up North, but I wasn't especially looking for them either.

 

We have them at our Walmarts here in NJ.   It says something like "don't forget to check for children left behind in vehicles".  It's kind of a weird wording IMO, but I guess it gets the point across.

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Did she just arrive from Iceland or something? Otherwise, I would think she'd know cars get too hot inside on a hot day.

 

I hope that she can get extensive safety instruction before the child is given back to her, because who knows what else she doesn't know??

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The idea is that the reminder could help jog a person's mind out of the habit memory that made them lose awareness that the child was with them, in the same way that seeing a diaper bag might snap them out of it. Some car makers are developing child reminder systems for vehicles. More on habit memory here.

When we were in Arizona a few weeks ago our rental car reminded us to check our back seats every time we put the car in park

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