Creepy grocery trip

[snickerplum]

Have you ever had an experience that left you feeling creeped out in a child trafficking sort of way? Without many details, I was left with that feeling at the grocery store tonight.

We get asked questions a lot because our kids are so close in age and people take an interest in our 3 girl/1 boy combo. No biggie. But a young male employee took an odd interest in the situation. Very very odd. I phoned and spoke with a manager after getting home.

I don't think I will be taking my children with me to that particular location any more. We have too many grocery stores in the area to bother with this one.

I told the situation to a few family members and friends to see if I was over reacting but everyone agreed (including the store manager) that it would have made them uncomfortable too.

I'm having a hard time shaking this feeling. Has this happened to you before?

 

 

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[EMS83]

Not that creepy, no.  The weirdest thing I've had happen is the bagger asking my youngest where his father was when h was two and couldn't even talk.  But because it's a chain that hires people with various challenges, I chose to figure it was something more along those lines.

Edited June 20, 2017 by CES2005

[LMD]

Dh had an experience like that the other day in the supermarket. With our 11 year old daughter and a creepy 60+ year old man. Dh is a big 6ft 3 guy and stared him down. Sometimes I am so sad that I brought a daughter into this world...

[snickerplum]

This guy was mostly focused on my son. Dh is out of the country until mid week...[emoji51] I'd feel better if he were home. This employee was the one who helped me get my bags in the trunk (it didn't get too too weird till we were outside), so can he get any info from (possibly) knowing my license plate number?

I could be blowing this all out of proportion. I mean, chances are. Just out of all the times I've been asked about the children I've never felt this weird. Of course there was the time a lady told us (while clothes shopping) that she had bags and bags of almost new clothes her grandchildren have outgrown at her house if we wanted them. For free. "You go down ____ road, turn right and we're the last house on the dead end street..." Uh, no way Jose. But thanks.

 

 

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[Jean in Newcastle]

No, they can't get information from your license plate unless they are the police or work on the DMV.

 

 

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[MommyLiberty5013]

In general, I always tend to trust my gut instinct. If something does not seem or sound right, it probably isn't. I say you handled this well.

 

Maybe his boss will keep an "eye" on him more or maybe this will alert them to a potential problem. I find it odd that he "changed" out in the parking lot and out of hear shot of any other co-workers.

 

 

[happypamama]

Not that particular one, no, but a couple of months ago, there was a strange guy at our Aldi. He was just wandering around, no cart, smiling and making eye contact with people. I watched to see if maybe he was shopping with someone, but no. I'm slightly paranoid about freak things happening (I blame my love of crime drama), so I kept an eye on his whereabouts. As I was baggy my groceries, he spoke to a cashier and asked for an application; then he left. Another woman came back into the store and said to the cashier, "That guy was creepy." The cashier and another woman in line, with a couple of small children in tow, agreed. I figure if four adult women were spooked, there was something hinky about him. The two women walked out together so the one could make sure the other got her babies in the car safely, and the cashier walked me out since I was alone. Never hurts to be cautious when something feels off! I think reporting him was a good plan. If nothing else, it can help the manager to chat with him about how he comes across.

[Word Nerd]

I got a creepy vibe from a man in a Walmart when DD was really little. The way he stared at her when we went past him with our cart made every alarm bell go off in my head, and I noticed several minutes after I moved quickly to another part of the store that he was following. I stayed near a man in military dress to finish shopping and left the store with a group of people who were going to the same part of the parking lot I was, but I considered just having DH come get us. (ETA: I wasn't thinking about child trafficking at all but that he was a predator.)

Edited June 20, 2017 by Word Nerd

[Guest]

When my oldest was 5 or so, she and I went to eat, just the two of us, at a local restaurant. The waiter was creepily fascinated with her from the first moment. Not like in a "oh how cute" sort of way. More like in a pervo type of way you'd imagine grown men who liked Brooke Shields in Blue Lagoon type of way. It was very uncomfortable. He just kept coming and staring at her while talking to us and making unnecessary trips back to the table. Then he asked her her name and where she went to school. She was little and didn't think twice, so she blurted it out before I could stop her. It seriously freaked me out. I ended up just leaving money on the table in excess and leaving so he wouldn't have my credit card info with my name.  I mentioned it to dh that night AND to her teacher at school the next morning (it was a private school and anyone who lives here knows which school it is- not like there's a ton with that name) so I felt it was a better be safe than sorry sort of thing. I also gave her a big talking to on who we tell certain info too. Sad I had to do it, but I guess in this day and age it wasn't a bad time to instill that.

 

It was one of those "trust your gut" type of things where I just knew something was off. People can call me paranoid, or whatever, but this guy was sketchy. So I totally empathize with you on those feelings. My personal belief is God gave us those feelings for a reason. 

[SKL]

No, never.

 

While there are weirdos out there, and this guy might be one of them, I don't think "child trafficking" is what you are talking about.  Child trafficking in the US is basically underage prostitution.  The kids involved are usually teens who have voluntarily left home, lured by promises etc.

[solascriptura]

I've never been creeped out at a grocery store, but then again I have the "b*tch" face thing going on.  I can't do much about it since i was born with it.   I'll sometimes smile at women and it seems to invite some chit chat, but I don't do that with men.  

 

It creeps me out when I'm in a workout class (it opens up to the weight machines) and men stare for a little to long at the women.  bugs me to death!  

 

 

[Katy]

Yep.

[DesertBlossom]

Yes. Once a foreign tourist and his wife (neither of whom spoke any English) took an interest in my son while we were at rather crowded public place.  At first it was fine-- I just assumed they were fascinated by the cute little blond boy. But then he got touchy and took a picture before I could think to stop him. I should have called security and maybe even the police. I still wonder if I should have. The whole thing still makes me sick to think about. But I hope it's an incident that DS someday forgets about completely and I think if I had involved security it would have been forever burned into his memory and I'd rather it not.

[MBM]

Years ago a middle aged man became too interested in my toddler son while I was at a Walgreens. He began talking to ds in a creepy voice and when he started bending down to touch him, I told him to back off and moved my son away. Normally, I didn't mind people talking to my kids when I was there but this guy was strange and about to touch my son. It scared him off.

Edited June 20, 2017 by MBM

[Carrie12345]

I have, at the library.  It's been a while, and I can't remember the exact details, but every cell in my body was sending out alarms.

 

My youngest two were on the giant, wide staircase, when the younger one sat himself down in the very middle, out of frustration or annoyance or whatever was going on in his little person brain. The older one, who is afraid of heights, didn't go to him b/c he couldn't let go of the railing.  I was maybe 5 seconds behind them on the ground floor, and our friends were right above them on the second floor.  A man on the staircase was trying to convince him to let him pick him up, even as he saw me right there. I kept the kids with me in the children's room after that, and the man proceeded to wander in and out, walking past our table, multiple times.  No children's books in his hands.

 

:::shiver:::

[Ottakee]

Yes. Once a foreign tourist and his wife (neither of whom spoke any English) took an interest in my son while we were at rather crowded public place. At first it was fine-- I just assumed they were fascinated by the cute little blond boy. But then he got touchy and took a picture before I could think to stop him.

Not to discredit your feelings at all but were they by chance Asian? I often read/hear that people traveling to Asian with blond kids experience this same thing. I see it more as the same way that white tourist take picture of Native kids, kids in Africa (and want to touch their hair), etc.

 

Then again I am all for mom's radar and protecting the kids.

[Baseball mom]

Always trust your gut! Especially when it comes to your children!

[Guest]

Yes.

 

I know some people think "instincts" are bollucks, but I think they are bollucks, so we are at an impasse.

[Guest]

I.

Then, last fall, I happened to catch a glimpse of the news and saw that the father of one of DS's friends had gotten arrested. He had been tracked online for months for child porn. It was the only house where DS had ever been for a sleep-over party. DS says nothing inappropriate happened during the time he was there.

 

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:svengo:

[MaeFlowers]

I got creeped out by a man in Walmart one time. He kept watching my d's who was about two at the time. He acted like he was just waiting for the opportunity to grab him. But, when he saw me watching him, he ran off.

 

 

Not to discredit your feelings at all but were they by chance Asian? I often read/hear that people traveling to Asian with blond kids experience this same thing. I see it more as the same way that white tourist take picture of Native kids, kids in Africa (and want to touch their hair), etc.

 

Then again I am all for mom's radar and protecting the kids.

I was thinking this, too. I had red hair when I was little. My Mom said women would approach her and try to touch me and give me candy. She said the women were nice and that they meant no harm but that she never really liked it. I believe the women were Middle Eastern.

[Monica_in_Switzerland]

Yep.  Travelling alone in a plane with my two kids.  A guy was fascinated by them and kept talking to us when it was pretty clear I was trying to give the cold shoulder without being downright rude.  When he attempted to pick up my ds age 2, I did make a scene and I think every person around us was at that point on high alert not to let the creepy guy anywhere near us for the rest of the flight.  Because a 12 hour flight isn't long enough already...  

[marbel]

Not to discredit your feelings at all but were they by chance Asian? I often read/hear that people traveling to Asian with blond kids experience this same thing. I see it more as the same way that white tourist take picture of Native kids, kids in Africa (and want to touch their hair), etc.

 

Then again I am all for mom's radar and protecting the kids.

 

I have had this experience with one of my kids.  It was not creepy but rather quite sweet, though I'm sure it would not have been under different circumstances, or if it happened all the time.  

 

(Not comparing it to the situation in the OP at all.)  

[EmseB]

After reading The Gift of Fear, I'm a firm believer in listening to my instincts that tell me something is creepy.

[SKL]

Interesting point - I remember when I went to Peru and there was the cutest little girl helping her mom sell trinkets to the tourists.  I felt conflicted about taking the little girl's picture, but I did take one.  It would be rather hypocritical of me to get testy should a foreigner in the US take photos of my kids.

 

Another time I touched a little boy in India.  He was taking his sweet time walking across a busy parking lot, and I was worried he might get hit by a car.  I put my hand on his shoulder to encourage him on his way.  I was chided by my Indian friend for doing that - not because I was creepy, but because I might contract lice ....  But to the point, if a foreigner did the same thing to my daughter, would I be right to assume anything ....

 

I do believe in creepdar though.  If it's blaring, listen to it.

[heartlikealion]

I did have an older grown man tell me my son was handsome or something along those lines before. I think he said it more than once so it was a little odd but I hoped he was just a friendly guy, not a perv. (was at some church function but I didn't know him).

 

One time dd ran into the sink counter at the grocery store in the bathroom with me and the employee near the sink thought it was okay to try to comfort her and pick her up. It was incredibly awkward. I truly believe the woman had no ill intentions. I removed my child and said that she didn't like strangers picking her up. I told a manager about the situation and asked if he could talk to the employee, basically about keeping boundaries. I told the manager I was not mad but that I didn't want the associate to think it was okay to do things like that. I had a feeling the woman either wasn't all there mentally or was just incredibly socially unaware.

[DesertBlossom]

Not to discredit your feelings at all but were they by chance Asian? I often read/hear that people traveling to Asian with blond kids experience this same thing. I see it more as the same way that white tourist take picture of Native kids, kids in Africa (and want to touch their hair), etc.

 

Then again I am all for mom's radar and protecting the kids.

I have had this experience with one of my kids. It was not creepy but rather quite sweet, though I'm sure it would not have been under different circumstances, or if it happened all the time.

 

(Not comparing it to the situation in the OP at all.)

They were from Beijing if I understood him correctly. That's definitely how it started out feeling, but in the 30-60 seconds that this interaction took place it got increasingly uncomfortable. The man got really touchy, putting his arm around DS. It started to feel weird. He patted his head and arm and before I knew it the man patted the front of DS's pants, directly over his genitals. At that point I grabbed DS and walked off, gathering all of my little kids (I was by myself and a little overwhelmed) trying to keep an eye on where this man went, and trying to decide if I should find security. I told DS "I am sorry if that man made you uncomfortable." He responded "he didn't make me uncomfortable." I don't know if he just missed that he had been felt up by a stranger or what, but I felt like going to security and making a big deal of it would freak DS out. I was sick about it for a long time, and wonder if I did the right thing by not finding security. But I don't even know if I could have found someone soon enough before he walked off anyway.

Edited June 20, 2017 by DesertBlossom

[scrapbookbuzz]

No, never.

 

While there are weirdos out there, and this guy might be one of them, I don't think "child trafficking" is what you are talking about.  Child trafficking in the US is basically underage prostitution.  The kids involved are usually teens who have voluntarily left home, lured by promises etc.

To the bolded: sometimes, yes. However, I have a friend who is now in her 30s who was abducted, for child trafficking purposes,  BEFORE she even hit double digits. I also can attest to at least one other case here of a girl who was abducted in the US when she was 9 for the purposes of child trafficking. It's not always teens whohave left home. Here in AZ we rank #1 in human trafficking, where traffickers purposely look for people to abduct for their nefarious purposes. So you can't really say the OP's kiddo wasn't being observed for that purpose.

[MBM]

Parents teach their children when and how to establish boundaries and how to react if someone violates them. If you ever feel uncomfortable, assert yourself by making it clear that you will protect your children and expose questionable behavior. Granted, some behavior is not harmful but if you feel uncomfortable, go ahead and assert yourself. That is usually enough to scare them off.

 

And don't worry about offending a stranger if you're creepometer is going off even slightly. Your job as a parent is to keep your child safe. If the stranger meant no harm, you've kept your child safe. If the stranger intended harm, you've kept your child safe. That is what matters.

 

My kids are all grown up now. I used to worry I might be overreacting but now as I enter the old geezer years, I am glad I stepped in when I felt it was warranted. The hard part was being able to do so when it caught me off guard.

[SKL]

To the bolded: sometimes, yes. However, I have a friend who is now in her 30s who was abducted, for child trafficking purposes,  BEFORE she even hit double digits. I also can attest to at least one other case here of a girl who was abducted in the US when she was 9 for the purposes of child trafficking. It's not always teens whohave left home. Here in AZ we rank #1 in human trafficking, where traffickers purposely look for people to abduct for their nefarious purposes. So you can't really say the OP's kiddo wasn't being observed for that purpose.

 

OK but how does a parent assume the weirdo had plans to traffic the kid, vs. abuse him directly?  If I was worried about a stranger looking at my child, I would be thinking the latter, not the former.

 

Recently a lot of people have gone online talking about how their wee tots were looked at by strangers and the moms were sure they were "about to be trafficked."  So I think people are using the word "trafficking" inaccurately.

 

(I'm not sure a little American boy has ever been stolen right out of his mother's arms, in a public place with security cameras, for the purpose of child trafficking.  But maybe there's one out there.)

[klmama]

A strange man started up a conversation with one of my dc while I was waiting to pay for something.  He seemed very friendly, said he was new to town, and asked where he could get his bike fixed.  Dc didn't know. Man asked where dc lived.  Thankfully, we lived in a different town, so dc gave that info instead of saying a neighborhood or street.  At that point, I turned around to look at the guy and smiled, so if he were really someone who was just being friendly, he would talk to me about his bike question, etc.  Nope.  Looked down, looked away, looked uncomfortable.  Creep.  The kids and I had a long talk in the car on the way home about adults being overly friendly to kids they don't know or asking kids for help, etc.  

[mykidsrmyjoy]

Our whole family, including DH, was home one Saturday morning when a parcel delivery truck came to to deliver a package. The driver had been here several times before and had seemed overly friendly to me, but I hadn't really had a lot of contact with him and just tried to be courteous but cool. My husband was outside when he showed up and the guy asked my husband if he could use our restroom. DH is one of the most hospitable, friendly people I know and didn't think twice about telling him to come on in and help himself to our restroom. I was inside with our three young girls and this delivery man comes in and starts talking to the girls and telling them how beautiful and lovely they are in a way that made me very uncomfortable. He then disappears into the restroom and spends probably over 5 minutes in there. I was so glad when he left and was disturbed that he had been so friendly to our little girls. I ended up calling the company he worked for and they assured me it was against their policy for their employees to use private restrooms. That man is still an employee with that company and I always feel weird when he comes with a package.

Edited June 20, 2017 by mykidsrmyjoy

[Lady Marmalade]

OK but how does a parent assume the weirdo had plans to traffic the kid, vs. abuse him directly?  If I was worried about a stranger looking at my child, I would be thinking the latter, not the former.

 

Recently a lot of people have gone online talking about how their wee tots were looked at by strangers and the moms were sure they were "about to be trafficked."  So I think people are using the word "trafficking" inaccurately.

 

(I'm not sure a little American boy has ever been stolen right out of his mother's arms, in a public place with security cameras, for the purpose of child trafficking.  But maybe there's one out there.)

 

There was a very disturbing video that popped up a few months ago of someone attempting to snatch a child. Mom and child were in a line- he was old enough to not be in arms, but was right there with her (AND with other people in the building)!  Sicko grabbed child and tried to drag them out the door while mom went ballistic and other people jumped in to help.

 

It was very, very scary and eye-opening.  

[La Condessa]

Not to discredit your feelings at all but were they by chance Asian? I often read/hear that people traveling to Asian with blond kids experience this same thing. I see it more as the same way that white tourist take picture of Native kids, kids in Africa (and want to touch their hair), etc.

 

Then again I am all for mom's radar and protecting the kids.

We deal with this all the time when we visit relatives in San Diego. Any public, touristy place we go, we will have Asian tourists getting excited about our kids, pointing them out to friends, taking pictures--one even following us for a ways snapping lots and lots of pictures. I guess four young kids close together in age, some blondes/blue-eyed, are just remarkable in their experience. On the one hand, I don't believe there's ever any ill intent, but it does make me somewhat uncomfortable. When our transmission went out last year and we were figuring out how to afford a new one so we could get home, dh joked that we should just go to the tourist spots and charge the Asian tourists for their photos of/with the kids.

[Guest]

Our whole family, including DH, was home one Saturday morning when a parcel delivery truck came to to deliver a package. The driver had been here several times before and had seemed overly friendly to me, but I hadn't really had a lot of contact with him and just tried to be courteous but cool. My husband was outside when he showed up and the guy asked my husband if he could use our restroom. DH is one of the most hospitable, friendly people I know and didn't think twice about telling him to come on in and help himself to our restroom. I was inside with our three young girls and this delivery man comes in and starts talking to the girls and telling them how beautiful and lovely they are in a way that made me very uncomfortable. He then disappears into the restroom and spends probably over 5 minutes in there. I was so glad when he left and was disturbed that he had been so friendly to our little girls. I ended up calling the company he worked for and they assured me it was against their policy for their employees to use private restrooms. That man is still an employee with that company and I always feel weird when he comes with a package.

 

:scared:  Oh man. That is completely creepy. I'm so sorry, that has to be horrible! I'm surprised they still have him on your route! 

[MercyA]

Not to discredit your feelings at all but were they by chance Asian? I often read/hear that people traveling to Asian with blond kids experience this same thing. I see it more as the same way that white tourist take picture of Native kids, kids in Africa (and want to touch their hair), etc.

 

A group of Asian tourists once took pictures of my (admittedly very cute) dog. I was holding him at the time and felt a little weird about it, but whatever. :) I wonder where those pictures ended up. 

[Paige]

I don't recall being creeped out with my kids. I have identical twins and they have always received an unusual amount of attention and I'm pretty used to it. Almost everyone has been nice and I tend to either be oblivious or try to assume that people mean well or perhaps have special needs if they act oddly. It's not to say I don't watch my kids, but I guess I don't really watch other people watching my kids b/c I'm used to people staring and ignore it.

 

When I was a kid, however, I had several incidents happen so I don't discount the need to be aware. I'm much more concerned about my kids now that they are older than when they were small.

[LMD]

Yes, I am more worried about my nearly 12 year old. The incident I described in my previous post brought back all the memories of men trying to get me into their cars, flashing, grabbing, yelling obscenities... dh didn't realize how common the experience is.

[Guest]

A group of Asian tourists once took pictures of my (admittedly very cute) dog. I was holding him at the time and felt a little weird about it, but whatever. :) I wonder where those pictures ended up.

That just reminded me of when we used to take our horses down to Galveston and ride on the beach. It didn't matter if they were Asian tourists, European tourists, or whatever- they'd wave us down to get pictures standing next to our horses on the beach. It was like LOOK! Texans on horses!! It always made everyone smile. These weren't creepy at all. I'm like you. I'd love to know where those pictures ended up. :)

Edited June 21, 2017 by texasmom33

[MedicMom]

We deal with this all the time when we visit relatives in San Diego. Any public, touristy place we go, we will have Asian tourists getting excited about our kids, pointing them out to friends, taking pictures--one even following us for a ways snapping lots and lots of pictures. I guess four young kids close together in age, some blondes/blue-eyed, are just remarkable in their experience. On the one hand, I don't believe there's ever any ill intent, but it does make me somewhat uncomfortable. When our transmission went out last year and we were figuring out how to afford a new one so we could get home, dh joked that we should just go to the tourist spots and charge the Asian tourists for their photos of/with the kids.

I have one that's blond and blue eyed and one that is red headed and blue eyed. We live in a small town that attracts thousands of Asian tourists every summer....and they always want to take my kids' picture. I usually say no, but I do understand it's a novelty for them.

 

I think child sex trafficking is way overblown. Yes, it happens, but people aren't generally stealing small children to sell them into trafficking rings. It is predominantly runaway teens and others who were lured into it under false promises. That said, I trust my instincts and have had a couple times when I felt someone was being overly friendly. Mostly, though, I am not too paranoid about stranger abduction.

[MedicMom]

There was a very disturbing video that popped up a few months ago of someone attempting to snatch a child. Mom and child were in a line- he was old enough to not be in arms, but was right there with her (AND with other people in the building)! Sicko grabbed child and tried to drag them out the door while mom went ballistic and other people jumped in to help.

 

It was very, very scary and eye-opening.

I saw this one. It had nothing to do with trafficking or anything else though. The would be abductor was strung out on drugs. He barely knew he'd even taken the child. He wasn't walking around looking for a child to run off with and sell.

[Guest]

Trafficking, kidnapping by abuser......I don't really see the difference. It still ends up with a horrible abused and most likely dead kid at the end. Who cares what it's called?

[Word Nerd]

I don't recall being creeped out with my kids. I have identical twins and they have always received an unusual amount of attention and I'm pretty used to it. Almost everyone has been nice and I tend to either be oblivious or try to assume that people mean well or perhaps have special needs if they act oddly. It's not to say I don't watch my kids, but I guess I don't really watch other people watching my kids b/c I'm used to people staring and ignore it.

 

Almost all of the interactions that strangers have had with my kids were completely innocuous and didn't bother me at all if I even noticed. This guy was an exception. I never even questioned dismissing or ignoring my reaction to get away from him because it was so out of the ordinary.

[SKL]

Trafficking, kidnapping by abuser......I don't really see the difference. It still ends up with a horrible abused and most likely dead kid at the end. Who cares what it's called?

 

I disagree completely.

 

1) Trafficking is a more significant risk to people likely to be trafficked.  A little kid with his mommy in public is not the target group.  There are kids at actual risk, and it makes more sense to focus on how to protect them.

 

2) Trafficking usually means unhealthy sex and abuse but not "dead kids at the end."

 

3) Child sexual abuse usually means worse abuse but usually not "dead kids at the end" either.

 

4) Even kidnapping usually does not mean "dead kid at the end."

 

5) I care what it's called because each of those crimes is a real problem that needs a real solution.  I care what it's called because when people hear stats about child trafficking, which are troubling in some locations, I don't want them thinking those stats apply to populations who aren't at significant risk.

 

6) Mostly I don't like people encouraging parents to freak out and make parenting choices that aren't best for their kids, over perceived risks that are mostly fantasy.

[Guest]

I disagree completely.

 

1) Trafficking is a more significant risk to people likely to be trafficked.  A little kid with his mommy in public is not the target group.  There are kids at actual risk, and it makes more sense to focus on how to protect them.

 

2) Trafficking usually means unhealthy sex and abuse but not "dead kids at the end."

 

3) Child sexual abuse usually means worse abuse but usually not "dead kids at the end" either.

 

4) Even kidnapping usually does not mean "dead kid at the end."

 

5) I care what it's called because each of those crimes is a real problem that needs a real solution.  I care what it's called because when people hear stats about child trafficking, which are troubling in some locations, I don't want them thinking those stats apply to populations who aren't at significant risk.

 

6) Mostly I don't like people encouraging parents to freak out and make parenting choices that aren't best for their kids, over perceived risks that are mostly fantasy.

 

I particularly disagree with this. I worked with trafficked male prostitutes (teens) in HIV prevention attempts. They most certainly DID most often end up dead before 20. They either got killed by a john, overdosed, or murdered in some other sort of street violence before 20. Or they killed themselves. Then there were the ones that just disappeared.......There usually isn't a happy ending that I know of- at least in Houston- where trafficked people are released and go on to live these wonderful productive lives. They end up dead. The means vary, but the cause is usually the trafficking directly or the fall out from it. 

[SKL]

I particularly disagree with this. I worked with trafficked male prostitutes (teens) in HIV prevention attempts. They most certainly DID most often end up dead before 20. They either got killed by a john, overdosed, or murdered in some other sort of street violence before 20. Or they killed themselves. Then there were the ones that just disappeared.......There usually isn't a happy ending that I know of- at least in Houston- where trafficked people are released and go on to live these wonderful productive lives. They end up dead. The means vary, but the cause is usually the trafficking directly or the fall out from it. 

 

OK, for that specific sub-group that you have personal experience with, it may be true, but I can't say I agree that that is no different from child sexual abuse.

 

When I read your "mostly dead kid at the end" I assumed you meant murdered by the person who took him/her.

 

In any case I do think it matters to use the term "trafficking" for trafficking only.

[BlsdMama]

Dh had an experience like that the other day in the supermarket. With our 11 year old daughter and a creepy 60+ year old man. Dh is a big 6ft 3 guy and stared him down. Sometimes I am so sad that I brought a daughter into this world...

 

 

No, be grateful she was born into a protective, loving home.  The world needs girls and they are an incredible blessing.  We just ALSO need loving, protective homes for them.

[OneStepAtATime]

I was at Target with DD.  We had gotten not only some clothing but some groceries, including perishables.  As we were leaving DD (who was maybe 5) said she needed to go to the restroom.  I parked our cart of purchased items right outside the bathroom (group bathroom with multiple stalls) and had her go in on her own.  I waited.  And I waited.  And got concerned that she wasn't coming out.  I finally left the basket and poked my head in the bathroom door calling her name.  An older woman, maybe in her 60s, was holding DD very tightly in her arms and stroking her hair rather intensely over and over while cooing to her.  DD was struggling a bit but I guess was not yet alarmed enough to really fight her or scream.  I immediately demanded to know what was going on.  The woman let her go, apologized, and left the bathroom.  I asked DD if she was o.k. She said yes but she got irritated that the lady wouldn't let her go.  We had a long talk about stranger danger.  It was a scary moment for me.  I should have reported the woman but I was so shaken I just wanted to get DD home. 

[billswife]

I recommend Gavin deBecker's book "The Gift of Fear". He tells a story in that of a woman at the department store with her son. A man comes up to her son and starts talking about video games and his own son. I think he even mentions going over to the arcade because his son is over there. She is creeped out but figures she is right there and not letting her son go anywhere with him. He keeps following them and talking to her son. At one point she stops paying close attention and when she looks up she realizes that the man and her son are gone. I don't believe she ever found out what happened to him. Gavin deBecker's book is not necessarily there to scare you, but to help you realize that you need to listen to that inner voice that tells you something isn't right about this.

[Word Nerd]

I recommend Gavin deBecker's book "The Gift of Fear". He tells a story in that of a woman at the department store with her son. A man comes up to her son and starts talking about video games and his own son. I think he even mentions going over to the arcade because his son is over there. She is creeped out but figures she is right there and not letting her son go anywhere with him. He keeps following them and talking to her son. At one point she stops paying close attention and when she looks up she realizes that the man and her son are gone. I don't believe she ever found out what happened to him. Gavin deBecker's book is not necessarily there to scare you, but to help you realize that you need to listen to that inner voice that tells you something isn't right about this.

 

The boy in the story was Adam Walsh, whose father, John Walsh, became a victims' advocate and hosted America's Most Wanted.

[mommyoffive]

I was at Target with DD.  We had gotten not only some clothing but some groceries, including perishables.  As we were leaving DD (who was maybe 5) said she needed to go to the restroom.  I parked our cart of purchased items right outside the bathroom (group bathroom with multiple stalls) and had her go in on her own.  I waited.  And I waited.  And got concerned that she wasn't coming out.  I finally left the basket and poked my head in the bathroom door calling her name.  An older woman, maybe in her 60s, was holding DD very tightly in her arms and stroking her hair rather intensely over and over while cooing to her.  DD was struggling a bit but I guess was not yet alarmed enough to really fight her or scream.  I immediately demanded to know what was going on.  The woman let her go, apologized, and left the bathroom.  I asked DD if she was o.k. She said yes but she got irritated that the lady wouldn't let her go.  We had a long talk about stranger danger.  It was a scary moment for me.  I should have reported the woman but I was so shaken I just wanted to get DD home. 

 

How freaky.