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so what can I use to flavor food


SparklyUnicorn
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that doesn't involve using food....

 

are there some magic spells I can cast on the food to make it taste amazing for a picky person with dietary needs that no human can manage? 

 

:cursing:

 

My dad is coming (for at least 2 weeks).  Trying to come up with food that works is impossible.

 

 

Edited to add:

 

This is more of a vent.  There truly is nothing that is going to fix this.  Maybe a stiff drink except I've sworn off drinking.  I might have to take it up again. 

 

Edited by SparklyUnicorn
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Do the dietary restrictions exclude the use of pepper?   Black, white, cayenne, different chile peppers that range from mild to incendiary?  

 

Just in case it's of interest: Spices Inc chart of chile peppers and their heat level.  (I'm not endorsing the company or their products. They just have a useful chart.)

 

I can't have that kind of stuff with my reflux.  My husband hates that stuff.

 

My dad...eh.  He does pepper his food heavily (black pepper), but I bought him the spicy Mrs. Dash and he said it's too spicy.  So....

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It's all in the spices.  Indian-lots of curry powder or garam masala.  Asian-lots of garlic and ginger. Italian-Garlic, basil, oregano. 

 

Curry powders are problematic in large quantities due to them being good sources of phosphorus and potassium.  Two other things he must avoid as much as possible (which isn't all that possible btw).

 

I'm telling you, I need magic spells.  LOL

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What does he eat at home?  Just make that.

 

Grilled chicken, beef, pork, etc.....no seasoning.  Ask him what he wants to put on it.......there are no-salt seasonings, will he use those.

 

Then serve rice, potatoes, bread, or pasta as a starch.

 

And veggies, grilled, raw, etc.....as a veggie.  

 

No seasoning on anything.  Everything just plain.  He can add whatever he can tolerate or use.  Everyone else can add salt or soy sauce, or a creamed sauce, or whatever.

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What does he eat at home?  Just make that.

 

Grilled chicken, beef, pork, etc.....no seasoning.  Ask him what he wants to put on it.......there are no-salt seasonings, will he use those.

 

Then serve rice, potatoes, bread, or pasta as a starch.

 

And veggies, grilled, raw, etc.....as a veggie.  

 

No seasoning on anything.  Everything just plain.  He can add whatever he can tolerate or use.  Everyone else can add salt or soy sauce, or a creamed sauce, or whatever.

 

He eats garbage and expects me to follow his diet when he is here.

 

He can't have potatoes.  He moans about plain rice, but I can't season it.  I don't eat starches of any kind.  I'm willing to make them, but see my first two points. 

 

I probably should put a disclaimer that there isn't actually anything anyone can suggest.  I'm venting. 

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He eats garbage and expects me to follow his diet when he is here.

 

He can't have potatoes.  He moans about plain rice, but I can't season it.  I don't eat starches of any kind.  I'm willing to make them, but see my first two points. 

 

I probably should put a disclaimer that there isn't actually anything anyone can suggest.  I'm venting. 

 

What do you mean by garbage?

 

What does he eat?  Why can't you just feed him that and be done with it?  And if he can't have salt, what garbage can he be eating?

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What do you mean by garbage?

 

What does he eat?  Why can't you just feed him that and be done with it?  And if he can't have salt, what garbage can he be eating?

 

It's as crazy as it sounds.

 

He has to watch potassium, phosphorus, sodium, and he has gout so he has to watch whatever goes with that.  When I ask him what he wants to eat he says "I don't know".  He is also inconsiderate of the rest of us with regards to food. 

 

Plain foods would work right?  But there is always some issue with that.  He doesn't like chicken breast.  Doesn't like pork chops.  Doesn't like plain food, but can't have a lot of things one would normally use to flavor foods. 

 

I don't know what he eats at home.  He'll tell me he can't have this or that and on his way here he stops and McDs and eats foods he says he can't have.

 

He'll say just do what it is I normally do.  So I do that and then as I'm cooking he'll say, "I can't have that."  Which ok, but what do you want me to do if you don't tell me what you want or what you can have?  I offered to buy him foods he wanted last time and so I did and he either didn't eat them or ate a little and the rest ended up in the trash.  Only thing he ate up was cheese danish. 

 

I'm at my whits end with him to be honest.  I don't really even want him to visit, but I feel mean to tell him no because there is no other way for him to see the kids.  They look forward to him visiting.  And he is the only family I have.

I'm just tried and frazzled over this.  And you guys are cheap therapy.  :laugh:

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I'd just cook what you normally cook and add a starch for him and give him a think of no-salt seasoning for him to use (or not) as he pleases while he's there. There's only so much you can do.

 

Yep.  This is all I can do.

 

Although as an added fun bonus....he is bitchy about leftovers.  Some nights I have to cook ahead because I'm not home.  But I'm just going to go about my business and try to pretend I don't care.  LOL

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Feed him his garbage and move on with your life. Release the stress to the universe.

 

Or he could, you know, prepare his own food since he has so many restrictions.

 

Edited by kewb
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If he's not willing to help you accommodate his needs by telling you specifically what he can and cannot eat, there's really not much you can do. If he says to do your normal thing, I'd do it. If there's something you know for a fact he can and will eat, have it on hand for him. If he complains about something you make not fitting his diet, tell him flat-out that you've repeatedly asked him for a list. You're not a mind reader. You don't have to say it in a mean way (although I totally get how hair-pulling frustrating this must be), but in a firm and matter-of-fact way. He's not a baby, so he needs to be a grown up and help you help him. If he won't, it's not your fault or responsibility. Have healthy things on hand and suggest he put together a plate from that.  I hate when people expect you to cater to them, complain about your efforts, and do nothing to make things easier. Hope the visit goes more smoothly than you expect. You're thoughtful to invite him.

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Feed him his garbage and move on with your life. Release the stress to the universe.

 

Or he could, you know, prepare his own food since he has so many restrictions.

 

oh yeah it's extra fun when he makes his own food (rare, but he sometimes does)

 

He does not clean up.  Leaves a mess. 

 

He is being rude right?! 

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big pile of low-sodium low-everything else dinners and a big smile. or a cell phone and the number of a delivery place. 

 

I used to order out a lot when he visited to avoid issues.  Now he tells me he can't have that food.  He can't have that food, but he has that food. 

 

I pointed that out to him last time.  We actually got into an argument.  It went nowhere.  He's nuts.  Literally. 

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Totally being rude but probably unintentional.  I think I could take the messd over the stress of what will I feed him.

 

I don't know.  Makes me angry as hell because I do everything around here.  More than once I had to clean before being able to cook because of messes.  I have a tiny kitchen. 

 

Sorry...I'm just venting before I lose it.

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If he's not willing to help you accommodate his needs by telling you specifically what he can and cannot eat, there's really not much you can do. If he says to do your normal thing, I'd do it. If there's something you know for a fact he can and will eat, have it on hand for him. If he complains about something you make not fitting his diet, tell him flat-out that you've repeatedly asked him for a list. You're not a mind reader. You don't have to say it in a mean way (although I totally get how hair-pulling frustrating this must be), but in a firm and matter-of-fact way. He's not a baby, so he needs to be a grown up and help you help him. If he won't, it's not your fault or responsibility. Have healthy things on hand and suggest he put together a plate from that.  I hate when people expect you to cater to them, complain about your efforts, and do nothing to make things easier. Hope the visit goes more smoothly than you expect. You're thoughtful to invite him.

 

What I want to know is what is healthy for him that he can have?  That's another issue. I don't know what fits into this diet and he is not telling me when I ask.  I mostly buy healthy food, but he claims most of it he can't have.  Many vegetables and fruits he cannot have.

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Can he have any salt? 

 

We use this

http://prg.stores.yahoo.net/13135.html

 

I don't know how much salt is in this but we always add salt so I don't think there is very much.  But we've found this to be one of the best spice blends ever.  Use it on popcorn, eggs, potatoes, meat etc.  The best part is that it doesn't taste like mushroom at all.  I have two mushroom haters who will find even the most obscure fragments in their food and they will both happily eat this seasoning.

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You must want to bang your head against the wall at this point.

 

Can you send him a grocery list and tell him if he wants to eat, he needs to check off what he can and cannot have?

[  ] Apples

[  ] Bananas

[  ] Plain chicken

[  ] Plain pasta

[  ] Jarred spaghetti sauce--list brand _________

[  ] Low-sodium saltine crackers

[  ] Etc.

 

Seriously, I know it's stupid to have to do that, but maybe it will hammer the point home to him? I don't envy your having to deal with this situation.

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Can he have any salt? 

 

We use this

http://prg.stores.yahoo.net/13135.html

 

I don't know how much salt is in this but we always add salt so I don't think there is very much.  But we've found this to be one of the best spice blends ever.  Use it on popcorn, eggs, potatoes, meat etc.  The best part is that it doesn't taste like mushroom at all.  I have two mushroom haters who will find even the most obscure fragments in their food and they will both happily eat this seasoning.

 

Wow, either way I might order that because it sounds so good!

 

He will eat mushrooms.

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What I want to know is what is healthy for him that he can have?  That's another issue. I don't know what fits into this diet and he is not telling me when I ask.  I mostly buy healthy food, but he claims most of it he can't have.  Many vegetables and fruits he cannot have.

 

Do you think maybe he doesn't really know?  For someone who doesn't really cook or know much about food, specialized diets like that can be really challenging, I think.  It might be why he ends up eating the wrong things anyway - he can't figure out what to eat so he ends up doing what is easy and right in front of him.

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It doesn't matter. He doesn't want to be healthy. He wants to be coddled.

 

Yes and he claims otherwise.  "He can take care of himself."  Except he can't figure out the wash machine, dish washer, soap and water in sink, cooking, etc. when here.  :laugh:

 

He's not used to having to consider other people.  Well I'm sorry buddy if that is a problem then maybe you should not come because I hate to break it to you, there are other people here!

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Do you think maybe he doesn't really know?  For someone who doesn't really cook or know much about food, specialized diets like that can be really challenging, I think.  It might be why he ends up eating the wrong things anyway - he can't figure out what to eat so he ends up doing what is easy and right in front of him.

 

Yeah he does not really know.  The doctors just tell him to do these things, but don't give him guidelines.  So I suggested he bug them to send him to a dietician and/or buy cookbooks or SOMETHING to find out.  He signed up for a class.  I was amazed...yay he is figuring this out.  Then he cancelled.  What?

I said to him on the phone yesterday please give me some ideas.  He kept saying he doesn't know.  Ok...so he finally gave me a couple of ideas, but this is enough food for a day.  He is not here for a day.  He is still relying on me to come up with stuff.  Which is absolute crazy bull crap.

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Yeah he does not really know.  The doctors just tell him to do these things, but don't give him guidelines.  So I suggested he bug them to send him to a dietician and/or buy cookbooks or SOMETHING to find out.  He signed up for a class.  I was amazed...yay he is figuring this out.  Then he cancelled.  What?

I said to him on the phone yesterday please give me some ideas.  He kept saying he doesn't know.  Ok...so he finally gave me a couple of ideas, but this is enough food for a day.  He is not here for a day.  He is still relying on me to come up with stuff.  Which is absolute crazy bull crap.

 

What did he tell you he could have?

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Wow, maybe get fixings for sandwiches and tell him he can create his own meal?

 

Ah yes.  Sandwiches were a staple when he used to come, but now with the low sodium that leaves out any deli meat or cheese.  He will eat tuna, but he had one sandwich of tuna and the rest ended up in the trash.  He wants fresh food each time and doesn't want to eat the same thing twice in a row.  He's a royal pain in the freaking butt.

 

You know what he said to me yesterday.  He wanted me to get corn on the cob.  I said ok I'll wait until the day I cook that because I don't have room in the fridge.  He said well ya know, your sister doesn't save her leftovers.  She just throws them out.  So that's why you don't have room...you eat your leftovers.  Ok...so what are you suggesting dad?  I waste food to accommodate you?  I don't understand him.  I really don't.

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Ah yes.  Sandwiches were a staple when he used to come, but now with the low sodium that leaves out any deli meat or cheese.  He will eat tuna, but he had one sandwich of tuna and the rest ended up in the trash.  He wants fresh food each time and doesn't want to eat the same thing twice in a row.  He's a royal pain in the freaking butt.

 

You know what he said to me yesterday.  He wanted me to get corn on the cob.  I said ok I'll wait until the day I cook that because I don't have room in the fridge.  He said well ya know, your sister doesn't save her leftovers.  She just throws them out.  So that's why you don't have room...you eat your leftovers.  Ok...so what are you suggesting dad?  I waste food to accommodate you?  I don't understand him.  I really don't.

 

I think he sounds too difficult to work around.  I'd probably take him up on his own advice to you to just make what you usually do, but leave the salt out of his portion.

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What Rosie said. He is on vacation, and you are the chef. What I do for mil is make enough dessert for her triple helping. By the time she finishes that, she stops complaining about the main meal. Also you might add cheese. Mil always complains about chicken because she wants beef, but if I make a simplified cordon bleu instead of roasting she gobbles it right down.

It may be a bad strategy though,.because instead of complaining about the food she wants to tell me the long drawn out details about the deaths of people she has known who had my illness. Since she doesn't control her diabetes, its difficult to move her to more positive topics as her brain is stuck.

 

Both shop rite and hannaford have low sodium deli meat.

Edited by Heigh Ho
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Disclaimer- I don't do this to those with actual issues. Just a certain two relatives who are beyond picky and modify whatever fad diet is hot currently to their not needed diet/invisible food allergies just showed up now needs..

 

I recommend my route for picky guests- here is a list of local places to eat and grocery stores.  Otherwise, you are welcome to eat with us only if you can not say one negative thing about the food.

 

This works very well for me.  Made the visits tolerable.

Edited by itsheresomewhere
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A friend's mother used to secretly put garlic into food.  Her husband swore he hated garlic but always loved the food that she made that contained it....

 

My father's insistence that he hated garlic is the reason my mother started using garlic powder. Her secret garlic ingredient. He loved her cooking. Even after they split up he always raved about her cooking. :)

Edited by Lady Florida.
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I'm slightly obsessed with Hidden Valley Ranch dressing mix.  I actually call it magic dust and I put it on everything from pork chops to potatoes.  I sprinkle it in the water that I am boiling for rice and I even sprinkle it on steaming vegetables.  It has 60mg of salt (which I googled and found out is considered low sodium) for 1/4 tsp and that 1/4 tsp can go a long way.  

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I've been through a similar dynamic. I came to believe that there really is a neurological addiction to some of the additives in fast food.  In this family member's instance, a lifetime of poor eating habits combined with some rigidity that came with aging created a real change in affecting any real change. We lived with the family member for months, their health improved remarkably when I cooked, but when we left all eating habits reverted and the poor health resumed.

 

You don't need to solve his health problems.  You aren't accountable for his choices. Eat what you are going to eat, and good luck gritting through.

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Ah yes.  Sandwiches were a staple when he used to come, but now with the low sodium that leaves out any deli meat or cheese.  He will eat tuna, but he had one sandwich of tuna and the rest ended up in the trash.  He wants fresh food each time and doesn't want to eat the same thing twice in a row.  He's a royal pain in the freaking butt.

 

You know what he said to me yesterday.  He wanted me to get corn on the cob.  I said ok I'll wait until the day I cook that because I don't have room in the fridge.  He said well ya know, your sister doesn't save her leftovers.  She just throws them out.  So that's why you don't have room...you eat your leftovers.  Ok...so what are you suggesting dad?  I waste food to accommodate you?  I don't understand him.  I really don't.

What does your sister feed him when he visits her?

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It doesn't matter. He doesn't want to be healthy. He wants to be coddled.

 

Aren't coddled eggs a thing? Perhaps he likes himself and his food coddled?  :laugh:

 

 

You could use that other white crystal - sugar. It makes things taste good. ;)  Butter makes things better, too. 

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