Why is everyone a life coach?

[Squawky Acres]

Multi-level marketing businesses are taking over my mom friends around here.  If I tell a friend she looks great, she tells me she is a Beachbody coach and wants to sign me on as a "client" and sell me expensive Shakology shakes and fitness websites.  If another friend looks glowing and healthy, it's because of Rodan and Fields skincare products, which have changed her life.  If another friend's children are never sick, it is all because of essential oils -- which she wants to sell me.  Someone else's great sense of style is all because of LuLaRoe, and I find myself added to her list for online "parties."  There is even a wise, experienced homeschool mom from one of our co-ops, who used to be a good source of advice -- only now she is a "life coach" and charges for consultations and seminars.  I feel as if friendship is being commoditized, and I can't even have a conversation with certain friends without worrying there might be some charge or some product to be promoted.  

 

The "life coach" thing is particularly confusing.  How does one become qualified as a life coach?  Would I ever feel confident enough in the way I was living my life that I felt I could sign on clients and help them live theirs?  What happened to just mentoring younger mothers or helping out friends?

 

 

 

[SKL]

I agree!  Once I made the mistake of expressing mild frustration (in a private group) at the many messages from FB Friend A, and Friend B had a hissy fit kuz she sells a product too.  :P  I went to check up on an old friend from my kids' gym, and her whole page is all face cream.  I've been involuntarily added to groups I will never ever participate in.  :P

 

I guess that's just how things are nowadays.  Sigh ....

[Hyacinth]

Yep. The life coach thing has infiltrated one of my circles too. A well-liked mom, known as a mentor of sorts to her daughters and their friends over the years, now conducts seminars and coaching sessions to help young people "find their passions" and "live their dreams." Used to be she just had them over for coffee and conversation. Now it's a paid consultation.

 

To each her own and all that....but I understand the yucky feeling you're describing with the commodification of relationships.

Edited April 3, 2017 by Hyacinth

[Seasider]

"Friendship is being commoditized." That's quotable. Sadly, it's true. Tupperware and Amway have been around forever, but there are many more products these days, and I believe the internet and multiple social media platforms make the appeal harder for some to resist.

 

ETA as far as the life coach, this is kinda how I feel about it... Let she who is without sin be the first to throw out life coach credentials. I much prefer plain coffee talk.

Edited April 3, 2017 by Seasider

[poppy]

When people tell me they are a life coach, I smile politely and roll my eyes HARD inside.
I mean really.   It means "I want you to give me money". Is what it means. 

 

I have an MLM friend go off on a RANT about why is it that people will support girl scouts selling cookies but won't support GROWN WOMEN trying to fundraise for their families?  And she hashtagged it #truthbomb. 

When I read that, I laughed and laughed.  I mean really.   Don't get mad at me for not handing you money because we know each other. Hand me money! I like money too!

[FaithManor]

I understand the feeling.

 

It makes me wary some times. Not so much of old friends as most of us are not the type to be involved in marketing. But very much of being introduced to new people or to have newbies attempt to form a relationship because many, many, many times it hasn't been genuine but instead, particularly with MLM's, disingenuous. It isn't about getting to know someone knew, but finding new prey.

 

This has especially been my experience with essential oils. My sister in law is seriously into them, and has lost a lot of friends over it. But she doesn't see it.

Edited April 3, 2017 by FaithManor

[J-rap]

I've wondered that too!  We have a casual friend who is part-time singer, part-time life coach.  I've wondered how you qualify to become a life coach!  It seems like you'd need to find a life coach who pretty much was you, but a little wiser.  

[Catwoman]

I have wondered how a person decides that they're just so incredibly wonderful and brilliant and insightful that they are qualified to "coach" other people on how to live their lives.

 

Doesn't that seem awfully arrogant and know-it-all-ish?

 

Maybe my opinion is colored because I know a woman who calls herself a "life coach." She has been divorced three times and her kids don't talk to her. Yup, if I ever need anyone to tell me how to live my life, I'm calling her right away. :rolleyes:

 

 

 

 

(Edited because my iPad autocorrect is out to get me.)

Edited April 3, 2017 by Catwoman

[FaithManor]

I have wondered how a person decides that they're just so incredibly wonderful and brilliant and insightful that they are qualified to "coach" other people in how to live their lives.

 

Doesn't that seem awfully arrogant and know-it-all-ish?

 

Maybe my opinion is colored because I know a woman who calls herself a "life coach." She has been divorced three times and her kids don't talk to her. Yup, if I ever need anyone to tell me how to live my life, I'm calling her right away. :rolleyes:

Exactly.

 

I mean, Mother Angelica has earned it. Really. She can be the ultimate life coach there. But most of us...not so much!  :lol:

[Guest]

My apologies to any life coaches reading this, but the only life coaches I've known in real life have had seriously screwed up lives. I think it's some sort of self-validation or something.

[kewb]

A friend of mine is a life coach. She went to school for it. Has been trained. Continues her education in the field. She is frustrated with everyone and their mother calling themselves a life coach.

Unfortunately, anyone can hang up a life coach shingle and start charging people.

 

As for the mentoring aspect, I think what happens is people have bills to pay. They look for ways to monetize their skills. They realize that a lot of people come to them for advice and that there are people who get paid for what they give away for free.

 

I detest the mlm people who push their skincare,oils,lularue all the time. Every interaction is "how can I dodge commiting to a party. Tbh, they don't remain in my friend circle for long.

[redsquirrel]

I hate to say that I actually know people who are getting certified to be a life coach, so there seems to be some scamming of the trainers, I mean, training and certification process.

 

There is some organization, I don't know the name, but it seems cult-like and a bunch of local homeschoolers are involved. It involves paying to go to these seminars where you pay to be 'broken down' and then somehow learn to rebuild yourself to meet your true potential? The people who participate for a while call themselves life coaches or something similar.

 

This was a few years ago and I don't know if any of the participants are still doing it. I quietly cut off contact with those folks, but I heard stories...a LOT of stories.

[FaithManor]

My apologies to any life coaches reading this, but the only life coaches I've known in real life have had seriously screwed up lives. I think it's some sort of self-validation or something.

I was just thinking of my ex sister in law's marriage and family professor who set himself up as a "marriage coach". He charged $100 an hour.

 

Oh, he'd only been married three times before, and ended up cheating on wife number three with my sister in law while she was taking his class.

 

Really not top shelf there! 

[rainbowmama]

I hate MLM. I will ignore the occasional MLM post, but if that's most of what I see from you, I will unfollow your FB. If you privately message me about it once, that's fine, if I actually know you, but after I tell you I'm not interested, I will unfriend you if you try to sell me something again. I understand the appeal of the side hustle. I will buy things from my friends' etsy stores and the like, but sorry, I don't consider most MLM businesses as a legitimate business I want to support. Sorry not sorry.

[wintermom]

And just how do Life Coaches measure their success? How many people they know who are alive? How many they haven't killed off with really bad advice? Just kidding. ;)  My first exposure to a "life coach" was at a seminar for professional speakers, which is another field where anyone can assume the title "professional speaker."  

[SKL]

So now you guys, I am wondering if I should become a life coach, or go hire me one.  :P

 

Either will require less time on WTM, so I think I'll just carry on.  :P

[Liz CA]

 

There is some organization, I don't know the name, but it seems cult-like and a bunch of local homeschoolers are involved. It involves paying to go to these seminars where you pay to be 'broken down' and then somehow learn to rebuild yourself to meet your true potential? The people who participate for a while call themselves life coaches or something similar.

 

 

 

To achieve this, you can join any branch of the military and you don't have to pay anything.

[SKL]

To achieve this, you can join any branch of the military and you don't have to pay anything.

 

Or you could have a 10yo daughter, who will tell you everything you aren't doing right and then some.  No extra charge.

[FaithManor]

So now you guys, I am wondering if I should become a life coach, or go hire me one.  :p

 

Either will require less time on WTM, so I think I'll just carry on.  :p

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:

[Hyacinth]

nm

Edited April 3, 2017 by Hyacinth

[Squawky Acres]

 

As for the mentoring aspect, I think what happens is people have bills to pay. They look for ways to monetize their skills. They realize that a lot of people come to them for advice and that there are people who get paid for what they give away for free.

 

 

I'm thinking that's what it is, and I want to be empathetic towards this mom in my co-op.  I don't particularly need extra money; and if I did, I could easily find some part-time work-from-home work.  People are used to paying attorneys for their advice.  I don't think this friend has any professional training, but is a successful homeschooling mom of many children.  I guess some of those mothers start homeschooling blogs and get ad revenue for posting their time-saving tips or thoughts on various homeschooling materials.  Maybe being a life coach is similar to that -- but just one-on-one or in person? 

[Slartibartfast]

I hate to say that I actually know people who are getting certified to be a life coach, so there seems to be some scamming of the trainers, I mean, training and certification process.

 

There is some organization, I don't know the name, but it seems cult-like and a bunch of local homeschoolers are involved. It involves paying to go to these seminars where you pay to be 'broken down' and then somehow learn to rebuild yourself to meet your true potential? The people who participate for a while call themselves life coaches or something similar.

 

This was a few years ago and I don't know if any of the participants are still doing it. I quietly cut off contact with those folks, but I heard stories...a LOT of stories.

Are you talking about Amway?

[SKL]

The thing is, doing business with friends is complicated.  It's one thing if you're selling hand-me-down clothes or whatever - the value is not subjective, you don't have to sell me on it, either I want it or I don't.  But if you tell me some pink drink is gonna make me skinny or pretty or whatever, and it doesn't happen, what then?  Do I tell you I'm dissatisified?  Do you keep selling me more?  At what point is a sham between friends a sham?  :P

[SparklyUnicorn]

My apologies to any life coaches reading this, but the only life coaches I've known in real life have had seriously screwed up lives. I think it's some sort of self-validation or something.

 

so flipping true!

 

It's like my life is a shambles and I have no marketable skill, I think I'll start a life coaching business.  I shi* you not.

 

(I'm sure this does not pertain to all life coaches, so my apologies as well.)

[freesia]

I have wondered how a person decides that they're just so incredibly wonderful and brilliant and insightful that they are qualified to "coach" other people on how to live their lives.

 

Doesn't that seem awfully arrogant and know-it-all-ish?

 

Maybe my opinion is colored because I know a woman who calls herself a "life coach." She has been divorced three times and her kids don't talk to her. Yup, if I ever need anyone to tell me how to live my life, I'm calling her right away. :rolleyes:

 

 

 

 

(Edited because my iPad autocorrect is out to get me.)

yep, that pretty much describes my feelings. the life coach I know. . . needs a life coach.

[FaithManor]

The thing is, doing business with friends is complicated.  It's one thing if you're selling hand-me-down clothes or whatever - the value is not subjective, you don't have to sell me on it, either I want it or I don't.  But if you tell me some pink drink is gonna make me skinny or pretty or whatever, and it doesn't happen, what then?  Do I tell you I'm dissatisified?  Do you keep selling me more?  At what point is a sham between friends a sham?  :p

Exactly!

 

I had a friend that did the pampered shelf thing. I bought a pizza stone, and it was faulty. Cracked in the oven the first time we made pizza on it. The thing was guaranteed, but she got really awkward about returning it, and then stopped returning my phone calls. Thus ended the relationship.

 

With the sister in law? I hate to tell ya girly, but sniffing frankincense is not going to cure dear father figure's terminal, stage four mesothilioma cancer. Not happening. If this were the cure, I guarantee you big pharma would have figured that out by now, patented their own franky formula, and would be selling it for $5,000 a sniff! It makes being related to her very, very weird, and sometimes stressful.

[freesia]

My apologies to any life coaches reading this, but the only life coaches I've known in real life have had seriously screwed up lives. I think it's some sort of self-validation or something.

 

Yes!

 

or very little life experience (lived life in same general area, very little outside work, no kids, no college).

[redsquirrel]

the 'life coaches' I know aren't messed up or anything like that. They are generally nice and professional people who, like someone mentioned above, get asked for advice often OR are people in the creative fields who have a hard time finding paying gigs or gigs that pay anything worthwhile. Getting paid to be a 'life coach' allows them to work on their own schedule and be available for their other jobs.

 

I honestly think, they actually want to be licensed therapists without paying for the pesky MSW and having to go through those professional rigors. OTOH, having MANY friends with MSW, it costs a fortune to get the degree and the pay can be absolutely abysmal. Don't get me wrong, there are some out there making a good living, but there are a lot of really good therapists out there making peanuts.  But given what I know some 'life coaches' pay for certification, seminars etc, I am not so sure it doesn't end up being close to the same thing over time.

[Guest]

I had a friend become a life coach and during the process our friendship changed. I felt like I was being analyzed and seen more as a client than a friend. Things we used to talk about as friends became things that seemed like now I was getting a pro bono "session." I wanted to ask her about how her business was going--you know, as an interested friend--but it turned into s pitch for attending one of her groups.

 

Ugh.

 

The one that kills me is another person I know of who is about the most screwed up person on the planet but who advertises as a life coach on FB.

 

That said, I did HIRE a life coach at a career transition a number of years ago but it was for a specified reason and two visits. But this was a guy with certifications in counseling and who was really linked into the worlds I wanted out of and into.

 

But the ubiquity of MLM-ness... Ugh.

[GoVanGogh]

Yes!

 

or very little life experience (lived life in same general area, very little outside work, no kids, no college).

Yup. I know someone about to graduate from an online college with plans to be a life coach. She is 20, from a very conservative homeschool family. She has not dated, no outside work.

I think back on all I knew when I was 20... Oh, how I thought I knew it all back then.

[NikiSC]

I'm afraid to make any statements like, "I have nothing to wear" , "DS is having migraines", or "I need to lose weight".

Responses come flooding in..."Girl, you should join my LLR party", "I have an oil for that!", "Think pink!", or "Honey, Shakeology changed my life!!!!" Etc!

I want to ask if there's an oil to make them stop spamming folks😂. And then there's the Pleximonies😬.

[SKL]

I so wish there were someone who could advise me, "me," the uniquely insane person I live with.  Nobody has been through it exactly.  :P

[FaithManor]

I so wish there were someone who could advise me, "me," the uniquely insane person I live with.  Nobody has been through it exactly.  :p

Right there with ya!

 

Dh will be an expert by the time I expire, but unfortunately the knowledge will not be useful life coaching anyone else. Unless there is a clone of me out there. Then he could make a killing on the consultations!

 

:D

[unsinkable]

Exactly!

 

I had a friend that did the pampered shelf thing. I bought a pizza stone, and it was faulty. Cracked in the oven the first time we made pizza on it. The thing was guaranteed, but she got really awkward about returning it, and then stopped returning my phone calls. Thus ended the relationship.

 

With the sister in law? I hate to tell ya girly, but sniffing frankincense is not going to cure dear father figure's terminal, stage four mesothilioma cancer. Not happening. If this were the cure, I guarantee you big pharma would have figured that out by now, patented their own franky formula, and would be selling it for $5,000 a sniff! It makes being related to her very, very weird, and sometimes stressful.

You're supposed to contact PC directly for returns and refunds.

 

Xxxxxxxx

 

Returns & Exchanges

 

We're delighted to have you as a Pampered Chef customer. Our products are selected only after careful testing; however, if you are not completely satisfied with your purchase (within one year) for any reason, please return the item for an exchange or refund. Proof of purchase (your order number) is required for all returns. You can access your order number from your Pampered Chef account. Contact the Solution Center at solution_center@pamperedchef.com or (888) OUR-CHEF (687-2433) to submit your request for replacement, exchange or refund.

 

Returns within 30 days of ship date: Upon the Solution Center's authorization of exchange, replacement or refund, we will arrange prepaid shipping.

Returns after 30 days of ship date: You'll need to return the product to the Company. Return packaging and any shipping charges are your responsibility. Returns must be received before any exchange, replacement or refund is processed.

Shipping products back to Pampered Chef: Please print the reference number you receive from the Solution Center on the outside of the package. Failure to include the reference number will delay the return process. Also, returned products should be securely packaged. Please use the original case or protective sleeve or be sure to pack the product so that sharp points or edges do not cut through the packaging.

Exchanges: Any price difference for an exchange will be adjusted.

Replacements: If actual product replacement cannot be made due to unavailability, we may, in our sole discretion, offer comparable product replacement or credit, which shall not exceed the price paid, toward future product purchases.

[FaithManor]

You're supposed to contact PC directly for returns and refunds.

 

Xxxxxxxx

 

Returns & Exchanges

 

We're delighted to have you as a Pampered Chef customer. Our products are selected only after careful testing; however, if you are not completely satisfied with your purchase (within one year) for any reason, please return the item for an exchange or refund. Proof of purchase (your order number) is required for all returns. You can access your order number from your Pampered Chef account. Contact the Solution Center at [email protected]<script data-cfhash='f9e31' type="text/javascript">/* */</script> or (888) OUR-CHEF (687-2433) to submit your request for replacement, exchange or refund.

 

Returns within 30 days of ship date: Upon the Solution Center's authorization of exchange, replacement or refund, we will arrange prepaid shipping.

Returns after 30 days of ship date: You'll need to return the product to the Company. Return packaging and any shipping charges are your responsibility. Returns must be received before any exchange, replacement or refund is processed.

Shipping products back to Pampered Chef: Please print the reference number you receive from the Solution Center on the outside of the package. Failure to include the reference number will delay the return process. Also, returned products should be securely packaged. Please use the original case or protective sleeve or be sure to pack the product so that sharp points or edges do not cut through the packaging.

Exchanges: Any price difference for an exchange will be adjusted.

Replacements: If actual product replacement cannot be made due to unavailability, we may, in our sole discretion, offer comparable product replacement or credit, which shall not exceed the price paid, toward future product purchases.

She never once told me that. Not once.

[Carol in Cal.]

I have known some excellent business coaches.  Mostly they operate in the space of 'if you could just talk through what you're trying to figure out with someone completely outside of the situation, you could resolve it yourself', and in business planning basics that you could get out of a book, but wouldn't.

 

I know one great divorce and life coach. 

 

I've known a lot of wannebees.  That is all.

 

 

[AmandaVT]

I was just thinking of my ex sister in law's marriage and family professor who set himself up as a "marriage coach". He charged $100 an hour.

 

Oh, he'd only been married three times before, and ended up cheating on wife number three with my sister in law while she was taking his class.

 

Really not top shelf there! 

 

I have a relative-in-law who is a life and business coach. He has been in jail twice, for drugs and for a s&x offense. He has been bankrupt multiple times and has a number of failed businesses. I cannot understand how anyone can pay him money for his "wise" words (apparently they do no googling prior to giving him their money). Years ago, I suggested that he become a certified drug and alcohol counselor. He was heavy into drugs for a long time and did clean himself up. I felt that he had relevant life experience that he could use to do actual good. But he went to a 1 week "become a life coach" class that his mom paid for (he was 40 at the time) and decided that it would be easy money. He's been scamming people ever since. 

[creekland]

Hmm... I guess I'm not worth saving.  I haven't had a single "life coach" try to get me to pay for anything.  I can't even think of one I know IRL - at least I don't know that they're a life coach.

 

With MLM, I just say no.  Sooner or later they get the hint.  I know my dad tried at least one of them (an electric supplier one).  In their sales pitch they TELL people their best potential sales come from friends and relatives... so there ya go.  Friends and relatives are doomed.

[Guest]

Totally relevant to the conversation... :lol:

 

Edited April 3, 2017 by Kinsa

[Jenn in FL]

Hmm... I guess I'm not worth saving.  I haven't had a single "life coach" try to get me to pay for anything.  I can't even think of one I know IRL - at least I don't know that they're a life coach.

 

With MLM, I just say no.  Sooner or later they get the hint.  I know my dad tried at least one of them (an electric supplier one).  In their sales pitch they TELL people their best potential sales come from friends and relatives... so there ya go.  Friends and relatives are doomed.

 

 

:lol: You are TOTALLY worth saving.  You post great replies and besides, your uber cute and uber talented boys are going to be doing stand up comedy one of these days and you don't want to miss their show!

 

Hmmm...No one has ever tried to "life coach" me either... :crying:

 

Maybe we are both doomed!  :laugh:

[Seasider]

:lol: You are TOTALLY worth saving. You post great replies and besides, your uber cute and uber talented boys are going to be doing stand up comedy one of these days and you don't want to miss their show!

 

Hmmm...No one has ever tried to "life coach" me either... :crying:

 

Maybe we are both doomed! :laugh:

More like you both have your acts together and no one thinks y'all need professional coaching. Edited April 3, 2017 by Seasider

[SquirrellyMama]

Or you could have a 10yo daughter, who will tell you everything you aren't doing right and then some. No extra charge.

#truthbomb :)

[theelfqueen]

I would happily coach you on your life. You pay me and I'll tell you everything you want or don't want to hear very happily. Cash first.

 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

[creekland]

Hmmm...No one has ever tried to "life coach" me either... :crying:

 

Maybe we are both doomed!  :laugh:

 

Perhaps we should form our own club?  We could have fun!

 

More like you both have your acts together and no one thinks y'all need professional coaching.

 

You take all the fun out of it...  :lol:  Perhaps others are too intimidated? 

[kewb]

Totally relevant to the conversation... :lol:

 

He cracks me up. I also love his one on essential oils.

[DawnM]

UGH!

 

A life coach?  What the heck?

 

 

[Word Nerd]

I don't know of any life coaches around here. Sounds like a market waiting to be tapped! ;)

 

We do have an abundance of MLMs, though.

[Starr]

The people in my world doing/trying this are sure to be rich and famous. ;)

[Lady Florida.]

I must live in a different world because I'm not seeing this.

 

We do have an abundance of MLMs, though.

 

Yes! There are plenty of those around. Or maybe they were always around and social media gives me the "opportunity" to notice them when I didn't before. 

[DawnM]

yep, that pretty much describes my feelings. the life coach I know. . . needs a life coach.

 

Yup, the one I know too.