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Have you ever researched someone for a while online?


DawnM
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I felt like a stalker, but a girl I knew way, way back in elementary school for just a year or two when I lived in Indiana as a child, came to mind.  I hadn't thought of her in many years.

 

But yesterday I decided to look up (Zillow) our old house in Indiana.

 

Anyway, it sparked an interest in looking up my friend's house.  I loved their house.  I always thought it was so cool.  It had a spiral staircase and an entire area of the house that was just for the kids.

 

The house is currently FOR SALE!  It was awesome to see the listing and pictures of the inside of the house, etc....

 

But that prompted me to look up her family and find out what was going on with them.  She isn't on FB, but a few of her siblings are.

 

Looks like she lives in Port Townsend, WA now, owns a restaurant, and has a grown son. 

 

It took a bit of digging (her father's obituary provided her location and current last name and husband's name), she isn't on FB, although her restaurant is, and photos of her are on there.

 

It is amazing what you can find out online.

 

Is that stalker-ish?  

 

I am thinking of contacting her.  

Edited by DawnM
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I once went looking for an old friend of mine and ended up finding a lot of information on her daughter, via some articles about her at her college.  She seems to be pretty high profile there.  I felt kind of odd afterward.  I always wonder if people have a way of knowing that someone is looking them up.  I've no idea how that would be, just guilt feelings working on me, I guess.  I mean, the information is readily available publicly so there's really nothing wrong with it. 

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Definitely I've done that!  I lived and grew up and hung out with the same group of friends from pre-K through my second year of community college.  Then I moved across the country and then to the other side of the world and lost touch with almost everyone.  (This was before the internet!)  Every now and then I'll think of one of those dear childhood friends and look them up.  I've been able to discover a little about some of them!  It warms my heart.  I'd love to go to a high school reunion someday, although my school rarely has them.

 

 

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When I received my ballot for voting once, I noticed that this jerk my husband was roommates with in college was running as a random third party candidate for statewide office.  My husband begged the college for a single room after the hijinx this guy pulled. I looked him up.  In part to reconfirm that he lives nowhere near us.  And in part to laugh at his overly earnest and wholly ridiculous political platform.  He is now married and has a daughter, which I hope for their sakes means he's improved.  Though looking at the political platform and given that he still has the same ill-advised haircut, I wouldn't hold my breath.  

Edited by LucyStoner
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Part of my job once was to research people online.  You'd be surprised at how much a little sleuthing can reveal.  (Which also prompted me to reduce my online presence, even though some of it cannot be erased without paying someone...lol.)  Even people that think they don't have anything traceable online can be located.  

 

 

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My paternal grandfather was married five times.  he had three children with his last wife, and I had looked them up.  part of it was in regards to getting information on the man (he was out of my father's life by the time he was three.).  I attempted to contact one of my father's half-siblings, but received no response.

it was really easy to get that much info - and the number of pictures they had of themselves online!  

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I recently looked up a childhood friend. She has a very unique name so information wasn't hard to find. I couldn't find her on fb, but I found her sister's profile. After following the clues I found a news article that confirmed my friend was the driver in a dui crash that killed her and her passenger. I thought about it for days. So unbelievably sad.

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I felt like a stalker, but a girl I knew way, way back in elementary school for just a year or two when I lived in Indiana as a child, came to mind.  I hadn't thought of her in many years.

 

But yesterday I decided to look up (Zillow) our old house in Indiana.

 

Anyway, it sparked an interest in looking up my friend's house.  I loved their house.  I always thought it was so cool.  It had a spiral staircase and an entire area of the house that was just for the kids.

 

The house is currently FOR SALE!  It was awesome to see the listing and pictures of the inside of the house, etc....

 

But that prompted me to look up her family and find out what was going on with them.  She isn't on FB, but a few of her siblings are.

 

Looks like she lives in Port Townsend, WA now, owns a restaurant, and has a grown son. 

 

It took a bit of digging (her father's obituary provided her location and current last name and husband's name), she isn't on FB, although her restaurant is, and photos of her are on there.

 

It is amazing what you can find out online.

 

Is that stalker-ish?  

 

I am thinking of contacting her.  

 

 

I don't think the word stalker is accurate.  I mean, you thought of an old friend and you searched for her.  I would contact her. 

 

In fact, if you are thinking of contacting her do it TODAY.  I searched for my best friend from when I was 10 and when I found her FB account I found she had died 3 years earlier.  I was so sad.  I did get to talk on FB with her 16 year old son. 

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If you have ever been involved in genealogy you know that this is how you find out a lot of info.  I recently found a ton of newspaper articles on my former MIL.  It was very interesting and led me down several more rabbit holes where I was able to contact a living relative of a deceased relative. 

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I don't think the word stalker is accurate.  I mean, you thought of an old friend and you searched for her.  I would contact her. 

 

In fact, if you are thinking of contacting her do it TODAY.  I searched for my best friend from when I was 10 and when I found her FB account I found she had died 3 years earlier.  I was so sad.  I did get to talk on FB with her 16 year old son. 

 

 

Oh, I am so sorry.

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If you have ever been involved in genealogy you know that this is how you find out a lot of info.  I recently found a ton of newspaper articles on my former MIL.  It was very interesting and led me down several more rabbit holes where I was able to contact a living relative of a deceased relative. 

 

I read that as, "I was able to contact a living relative and a deceased relative."

 

I thought, "oh my!"

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Yes, and it's usually depressing. Old friends seem to be doing such exciting things and are very accomplished. I'm, well, just not.

I'm not depressed about it but yes this is the time where my former classmates careers are taking off and I have very little to show in that regard. There will be some major second act, it's just not the time for it now.
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I haven't, but after realizing how much people could figure out about random anonymous Reddit posters, or how much people on the Free Jinger website have figured out about random people in fundy circles I have lessened my online presence.  I don't post pictures of my kids online either.

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I have.  When I was chair bound due to a hip issue, I found I could help our high school reunion committee (the 40th reunion) by locating missing classmates.  I found 40 of 80 missing.  A few were deceased.  

 

I'm pretty harmless (at least if you don't put your dirty dishes on the counter) and I'm not all that search-savvy, but it did make me aware of how much is available to someone who searches and can connect dots.  

 

I'm glad I did what I did for our high school class.  About half those I found came to the reunion, and only 2 were snotty in their replies.

 

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I have.  When I was chair bound due to a hip issue, I found I could help our high school reunion committee (the 40th reunion) by locating missing classmates.  I found 40 of 80 missing.  A few were deceased.  

 

I'm pretty harmless (at least if you don't put your dirty dishes on the counter) and I'm not all that search-savvy, but it did make me aware of how much is available to someone who searches and can connect dots.  

 

I'm glad I did what I did for our high school class.  About half those I found came to the reunion, and only 2 were snotty in their replies.

 

I've tried to keep a pretty low profile online but sometimes I am tempted to ask someone to search what they can find on me. I am sure I would be appalled.

 

In your case, it was nice you were able to reconnect with some people from your past.

Whenever I try to locate old classmates, I don't find much but this is probably due to the fact that I lived in Europe for a while.

Edited by Liz CA
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I've tried to keep a pretty low profile online but sometimes I am tempted to ask someone to search what they can find on me. I am sure I would be appalled.

 

In your case, it was nice you were able to reconnect with some people from your past.

Whenever I try to locate old classmates, I don't find much but this is probably due to the fact that I lived in Europe for a while.

 

I have an exceptionally good memory for things that you would not believe.  Like people's names, if I have not seen them in 40 years.  Middle names.  Family names.  Sibling names.  Parent names.  It helps that I grew up in a really stable community.   :0)

 

But my memory for relevant things?  Ack.  Eg.  I forget to move the washed clothes to the dryer on a daily basis.  Go figure.

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I've tried to keep a pretty low profile online but sometimes I am tempted to ask someone to search what they can find on me. I am sure I would be appalled.

 

In your case, it was nice you were able to reconnect with some people from your past.

Whenever I try to locate old classmates, I don't find much but this is probably due to the fact that I lived in Europe for a while.

 

 

What do you mean it is due to you having lived in Europe for a while?

 

Why would that affect your ability to find out things online?

 

I grew up in Africa.  I only knew this girl when I lived in the US for 2-3 years when I was young.

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