mathnerd Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 (edited) I use this term often and most people I talk to give me confused looks and act as if I am saying something weird. I have consciously started avoiding that phrase. I am thinking that if I knew how to explain the meaning better, then people will understand better. For context, I am on so many volunteer committees (kids activities with mostly same parents), I sign on for some responsibility and in the end, I and another lady who is equally earnest end up doing all the tasks while the other people who signed up are unavailable (busy, spring break, sick, field trip chaperoning etc). I called a meeting and said not to leave me "to hold the bag" in the future (I spent until 3 am last night finishing laminating and cutting out some manipulatives for a group class that someone else could not do). It did not seem to register with any body. So, am I using this phrase in the correct context? Is it an outdated phrase? Do any of you use it? ETA: On another note, I also told them, that for a few months, I will participate without signing on for responsibilities and hopefully others will chip in. Edited March 28, 2017 by mathnerd 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kareni Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I use the term "left holding the bag" in the same sense as you -- to me, it means to be the one who is left with all the responsibilities. Here's a post on the phrase. I hope that others will now "step up to the plate"! Regards, Kareni 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janie Grace Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I have heard "left holding the bag" and I am familiar with that meaning (the same one as you describe). I have never heard the term "bag-holder." 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 (edited) Someone left "holding the bag" was left with stolen goods. By extension, it is someone left with the negative consequences of something while others get away free. I have never heard it phrased as "to hold the bag". ETA: I have also never heard "bag holder". Edited March 28, 2017 by Jean in Newcastle 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I'm surprised no one knew what you meant. Are you sure they didn't understand, or could it have been that they were actually planning to leave you holding the bag and we're embarrassed that you caught on? 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bootsie Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 "Left holding the bag" is something I would expect people to know the meaning of. If I just heard "bag holder" I would probably need to hear it in context to jump to the meaning. If I were working on a project with people, I might begin think in literal terms regarding whether there was a bag involved. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Strawberry Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I hear it as "take the blame", as in a group of people are in something together, but only the one "holding the bag" is held responsible. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Left holding the bag is clear to me. Bag holder isn't. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Someone left "holding the bag" was left with stolen goods. By extension, it is someone left with the negative consequences of something while others get away free. I have never heard it phrased as "to hold the bag". ETA: I have also never heard "bag holder". Yup. Several people rob a bank and hand you the loot...and you are left holding the bag (with the stolen money or goods). Rather common saying around here. Maybe you need to move closer to me? 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Yup. Several people rob a bank and hand you the loot...and you are left holding the bag (with the stolen money or goods). Rather common saying around here. Maybe you need to move closer to me? Not if you're going to leave me holding the bag! 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janie Grace Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Another thought... I would think it odd if someone said "I hope you don't leave me to hold the bag." I would think maybe that person was not a native English speaker and was trying to use an idiom but not getting it quite right. I only ever hear it said "holding the bag," as in "Everyone said they would help, but I was left holding the bag." 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I don't think I would say "Don't leave me to hold the bag". It'd have to be "I don't want to be left holding the bag, you all have to pitch in!" I've also heard "left holding the baby", and you all need to click that link or this one if you need the lyrics. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Interesting. Before reading the thread, I would have thought of left holding the bag as meaning the one who goes through the effort but gets no reward, as in: A child brings a sack of candy to the playground to share, but after the mad rush and grabbing of candy, he is left holding the (empty) bag. So he did the work to arrange the special thing, but ultimately gets no pleasure out of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Not if you're going to leave me holding the bag! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 But a bagman means that the person collects/holds/passing out the money...so maybe people are confused when you use bag holder? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I've never heard "bag holder". I was left holding the bag I have heard/read, but it sounds to me more like I was left with nothing after everyone got the good stuff, not someone else dropped the ball and left me with all the responsibility. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 FWIW, I've been noticing that few people under the age of 40 are familiar with common idioms. I use a LOT of idioms, or did, until I started noticing that the younger generation never learned them. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Someone left "holding the bag" was left with stolen goods. By extension, it is someone left with the negative consequences of something while others get away free. I have never heard it phrased as "to hold the bag". ETA: I have also never heard "bag holder". This! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 FWIW, I've been noticing that few people under the age of 40 are familiar with common idioms. I use a LOT of idioms, or did, until I started noticing that the younger generation never learned them. They should add it to those "adult schools" that millennials are using now. How to use idioms. I used to teach a lesson on idioms to the English teachers when I lived in China. They all thought it was beyond bizarre. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 They should add it to those "adult schools" that millennials are using now. How to use idioms. I used to teach a lesson on idioms to the English teachers when I lived in China. They all thought it was beyond bizarre. I thought it was cool how E.D. Hirsch included "common sayings" as part of his Core Knowledge curriculum. When I started hs'ing, I worked those into the lesson plans, but then I realized that our extensive reading covers it effortlessly. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Yes, I would understand "left holding the bag," but if I were trying to communicate what you were trying to communicate, I would not use an idiom. Clarity is imperative when you need people to act responsibly. An aside: this is called the 80/20 principle. 80% of the work is done by 20% of the people, and it has been true in EVERY group or organization I have ever been part of. The dedicated few do the large majority of the effort. It may be a more glaring fault in some homeschooling circles, though. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I asked dd15 and she immediately said "it means being left with the blame for something". Since you were left with work and not blame, I'm not sure that the idiom is 100% correct in this situation. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I asked dd15 and she immediately said "it means being left with the blame for something". Since you were left with work and not blame, I'm not sure that the idiom is 100% correct in this situation. According to Dictionary dot com, either holding the blame or the responsibility is the meaning. To have the blame or responsibility thrust upon you: “When his partner skipped town, Harry was left holding the bag 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne in ABQ Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 From the book, "The Facts on File Dictionary of Cliches": hold(ing) the bag, to/be left: Abandoned by others, left in the lurch to carry the responsibility or blame. The implication in this expression, used since the eighteenth century, is that one is left holding an empty bag while others have made off with the presumably valuable contents. The phrase has often been used in international relations -- for example, by Thomas Jefferson ("She will leave Spain the bag to hold," Writings, 1793), and on the eve of America's entrance into World War II, by Clare Boothe (Luce) in Europe in the Spring (1940): "When bigger and better bags are made, America will hold them." 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chocolate-chip chooky Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 (edited) To me, being the 'bag holder' is the one who will be responsible. For example, everyone goes rushing off to line up for a rollercoaster at a themepark and someone has to stand back and look after all the bags. That's the bag holder. Kind of like being the designated driver on a night out. Everyone else is having the fun, but someone has to be responsible. I've never used it with regard to blame though. Interesting. Edited March 28, 2017 by chocolate-chip chooky 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura in CA Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 FWIW, I've been noticing that few people under the age of 40 are familiar with common idioms. I use a LOT of idioms, or did, until I started noticing that the younger generation never learned them. So, we are friends with an older man (our age) who is apparently unfamiliar with the term "idiom." In our small group the term came up, and he said in a dismissive tone, "Idioms? I never use 'em." So another guy in our small group and I were quite naughty and had a lot of fun with that, saying things like "Joe wouldn't touch an idiom with a ten-foot pole" and "Joe thinks that the only good idiom is a dead idiom" :laugh: :lol: . Oh dear, we were bad. But he had no idea we were making fun of him ... :) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 My 14yo sounded very confused when I asked her what "Don't leave me holding the bag" meant, but she did tell me she thinks it probably means "Don't leave me with all the things you're supposed to help with." "Don't leave me TO HOLD the bag" would definitely confuse my ears for a minute, but I'd get what you were going for. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 (edited) I thought it was the person left with the damning evidence of a crime committed by a group. Say 4 robbers went in and filled up a bag with jewelry, then heard a siren and 3 of them ran like heck, leaving the 4th one holding the bag. But I use that saying often also. Basically, you all dumped the responsibilities on me and scattered. Edited March 29, 2017 by SKL 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 FWIW, I've been noticing that few people under the age of 40 are familiar with common idioms. I use a LOT of idioms, or did, until I started noticing that the younger generation never learned them. Are they really that common, then? :P More seriously, is it possible that people under 40 have their own set of common idioms and proverbs and catchphrases, and it just doesn't overlap that neatly with the set you know? 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janeway Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 I am sure they all knew exactly what you meant. That is a very common term. They were just acting confused because they know they are guilty of leaving you two holding the bag. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluegoat Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 I know what it means, but I wouldn't tend to use it in that context - to me, it means being left with the blame. You might say, responsibility for things gone wrong. But I don't understand it as meaning responsibility in a more general sense. The reason holding the bag is a problem is because it contains "stolen goods." So I might misunderstand if used in the context of being left with all the work - I would think that the person thought they were getting blamed for something. I also, however, have noticed young people not understanding idioms. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Are they really that common, then? :P More seriously, is it possible that people under 40 have their own set of common idioms and proverbs and catchphrases, and it just doesn't overlap that neatly with the set you know? I think that's it. They are more likely to have their own sayings like, "He took an L." My son says this all the time to mean he failed, he was a loser. DS17 also has the entirely different set of meanings (mostly crude) for the emojis we all know and love. So, I'm using an emoji that means, "Wow! That's beautiful!" And he says, "Don't use that, mom! It means __________!" (Something crude) No it doesn't, dude. Not when you're 45. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 I haven't heard "bag holder" but "left holding the bag" is understood by people in my circle. I've heard people ask about its origin but haven't come across anyone who doesn't know what it means now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebel Yell Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 I think that's it. They are more likely to have their own sayings like, "He took an L." My son says this all the time to mean he failed, he was a loser. DS17 also has the entirely different set of meanings (mostly crude) for the emojis we all know and love. So, I'm using an emoji that means, "Wow! That's beautiful!" And he says, "Don't use that, mom! It means __________!" (Something crude) No it doesn't, dude. Not when you're 45. Oh my! I need to know which one this is... is it the smiley face with hearts for eyeballs? What else could it mean??? Of course, I do know to NEVER use the eggplant to let the girls know we're having eggplant parmigiana for dinner 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Oh my! I need to know which one this is... is it the smiley face with hearts for eyeballs? What else could it mean??? Of course, I do know to NEVER use the eggplant to let the girls know we're having eggplant parmigiana for dinner It is the smiley face with hearts for eyes. According to DS, that means...something about same-sex attraction. Now I need to know what else an eggplant means... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Oh my! I need to know which one this is... is it the smiley face with hearts for eyeballs? What else could it mean??? Of course, I do know to NEVER use the eggplant to let the girls know we're having eggplant parmigiana for dinner Oh no! I have used the eggplant :( Should I be embarrassed? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janie Grace Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Oh no! I have used the eggplant :( Should I be embarrassed? It's commonly used to mean the male "member." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Learn something new daily. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mellifera33 Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 A good rule of thumb for teenage boys: anything that when you squint could be construed as vaguely elongated can represent male genitalia. Anything with an opening or hole can represent female genitalia. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 It's commonly used to mean the male "member." Thanks for cluing me in! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebel Yell Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 It is the smiley face with hearts for eyes. According to DS, that means...something about same-sex attraction. Now I need to know what else an eggplant means... I see someone clued you in on the eggplant The heart-eyes? REALLY? Maybe this is regional. I've only ever seen teen guys use this to show appreciation for a beautiful selfie posted by their girlfriend. And for extra-special pictures from friends, like showing extra appreciation for their prom photos. Often accompanied by the fire emoji and "100" BTW, the peach emoji means a butt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebel Yell Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Oh no! I have used the eggplant :( Should I be embarrassed? What have you been using it for? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 🌵 This probably doesn't mean saguaro cactus... :leaving: 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El... Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 I'm (slightly) under 40, and I know that "left holding the bag" means left to deal with the responsibility while your friends take off free. Eggplant! Haha! Yes, I've heard that one is an innuendo. I watch stupid/funny TV, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitten18 Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 It's commonly used to mean the male "member."An eggplant? That's quite generous. 😂 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 So, I'm using an emoji that means, "Wow! That's beautiful!" And he says, "Don't use that, mom! It means __________!" (Something crude) No it doesn't, dude. Not when you're 45. My mother cracked up laughing one day. She said that she'd been watching Jersey Shore* and apparently the same V sign that her parents used for "victory" and she used for "peace" now means "viagra". * Cancer. She has a lot of time to kill, but a good prognosis. On a related note, Dorothy's outfits on Golden Girls are all hideous. A good rule of thumb for teenage boys: anything that when you squint could be construed as vaguely elongated can represent male genitalia. Anything with an opening or hole can represent female genitalia. Another my-mom story. She has a brother six years younger than her, and when he went through that phase he went around telling his family "don't say this, say that". As in "don't say ball, mom, say spaldeen". This was all very irritating, and eventually my mom told him "Don't say 'fridge', it's really not nice", and their mom backed her up. Three hours later he was still puzzling over it! "Fridge. Fridge. I don't get it!" But, yes. When your brains are sufficiently addled with hormones, anything and everything will look either phallic or yonic. The heart-eyes? REALLY? Maybe this is regional. Probably! There have been some interesting surveys on regional usage of internet slang, and emojis fit right in. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mathnerd Posted March 29, 2017 Author Share Posted March 29, 2017 (edited) From the book, "The Facts on File Dictionary of Cliches": hold(ing) the bag, to/be left: Abandoned by others, left in the lurch to carry the responsibility or blame. The implication in this expression, used since the eighteenth century, is that one is left holding an empty bag while others have made off with the presumably valuable contents. The phrase has often been used in international relations -- for example, by Thomas Jefferson ("She will leave Spain the bag to hold," Writings, 1793), and on the eve of America's entrance into World War II, by Clare Boothe (Luce) in Europe in the Spring (1940): "When bigger and better bags are made, America will hold them." This was the context that I was using it in. This has been a very interesting discussion. Thanks for all your input. As for many of you being unfamiliar with "bagholder" - I finally know where I have heard it used frequently - on CNBC!!! I have watched the stock trading channel for years and the common term for people who buy stock at high prices and never sell it and the company goes bankrupt and all of it is worthless (buy high, sell low!) is "bag holder". It has the same connotation as "holding the bag" because everyone else has bailed out of the stock and the bag holder is left with worthless stock. http://www.investopedia.com/terms/b/bag-holder.asp Edited March 29, 2017 by mathnerd 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 What have you been using it for? Literal eggplant! (Fortunately just with my kids.) Recently I took a picture at a farmstand and texted it along with "look at all the beautiful ðŸ†!" Glad I didn't put that on Facebook! 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chocolate-chip chooky Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 This is not quite relevant, but it's funny nonetheless and this thread made me think of it. I overheard my guitar-playing 10yr old daughter mumble that she had a problem with her g-string. I was in another room, but absolutely lost it :smilielol5: 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 Literal eggplant! (Fortunately just with my kids.) Recently I took a picture at a farmstand and texted it along with "look at all the beautiful ðŸ†!" Glad I didn't put that on Facebook! Oh my word!!! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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