10 years since I graduated college, and became a mom. Advice. work or stay a sahm & try to make $

[angelica]

My youngest started kindergarten this year and for the first time I have a solid 4 hours to myself while they are at school 'part time'. Next year our 2 kids (5&9) will go to school full time and I would like to go back to work, but only because I feel like a failure at home.

 

In October I started selling on ebay again and I've been reminded of how much I love it. While in college I sold on there to pay my tuition, in addition to working a full time job. Looking at my sale history since opening my account in 2002 at age 18 I have sold over 65k worth of of stuff. Most of that was sold before I had kids and had access to what I have now. 

 

Literally everything I've sold in the last month has turned a profit, thanks to them all being bought at a thrift store. I've basically just been reselling what I've purchased over the years for my family. I do find things I can resell while at thrift shops too so I will pick those up and flip them. I've always kinds of done this but not seriously because it's time consuming. With the kids in school now though I see that maybe I can pick it up a little more.

 

I know many moms who are turning to making money at home with modern day avon alternatives (beautycounter, doterra & lularoe) and I just can't get on board with that. I don't like having to talk to people and sell them. I like the prospect of making money on the side again though. 

 

I guess I don't really have a conclusion on this post but I truly needed to get this off my chest, so if there is anything you can chime in to say I would greatly appreciate it. This month being my 10 year anniversary is making me think way too much. 

Edited December 3, 2016 by angelica

[maize]

What is your degree in?

[Anne in CA]

Well, you went to college and it formed the person you are. You shouldn't feel failure, because your very success at Ebay tells me you apply new knowledge to be successful. I didn't finish college and while it bothers me sometimes, I know from the board that plenty of people finish college and have a super hard time paying off the degree, so there's that. Probably any business you had from home would benefit from what you now know. I would do what you feel comfortable doing, and be proud of yourself for it.

[lmrich]

Wow! You must be very organized to sell that much!

What was your major in college?

[Carol in Cal.]

I used my college education directly for about 17 years.  I've used it indirectly quite a bit.  And I've used it not at all quite a bit.  But I'm an educated, well-rounded person, and I don't feel that my college education was wasted.  Sounds like you're a well-educated, capable, effective person, and I don't believe your college education was wasted.  

 

I'd like to see more people start their own businesses.  It's very empowering, and it's a great thing to model to your kids and to others, and you can put as much or as little into it as you want.  Sounds like you have a real talent for it, and I think that's great.  Don't let THAT go to waste!

[fairfarmhand]

If you enjoy ebaying, what holds you back from embracing that as your future?

 

Said very kindly...Is it about status? Are you worried about being *just* an at home mom with a side business?

[Guest]

If you enjoy ebaying, what holds you back from embracing that as your future?

 

Said very kindly...Is it about status? Are you worried about being *just* an at home mom with a side business?

That's my question - if this is about something you want to do for you and the best choice for your family? Go for it! But you have been very successful with eBay too, and if you like it as a side business and don't want to do anything else then don't! I'm one of those who was a housewife and a SAHM before I had homeschoolers, and I will be so after the school is done too, most likely. I do maintain some side businesses and hobbies but they're not so much for income and my husband is totally on board with this. As much as I sometimes feel inadequate, especially financially, the fact is that I'm happiest this way and my husband is too, so then it's just a concerted effort to block out the keeping-up-with-the-Jones mentality that likes to creep in and make me feel 'less than' for my choices.

 

If you love your degree and want to work? Awesome! If you are happy with eBay and being at home? Awesome! Nobody can really answer this for you but you and your own family and situation :)

[LucyStoner]

What do you want to be doing in 5 years? 10 years? 30 years?

[heartlikealion]

Well maybe you could just expand the ebay thing to make it more your own thing? Make something to sell in addition to whatever you already sell? You said you love it and you're debt free, so it sounds like you could enjoy continuing it. Is there a way to be a middle man? Like help someone else ebay and get part of the profit?

[angelica]

My degree was in merchandising, and I had a minor in business management. At this point I just want to make a little bit of money for the sake of doing so. Honestly nobody even knows about my selling on ebay except for a few family members.

 

Today I sold 2 things and for a total of $44 bucks, I paid $4 and we used them a couple times but the my kids outgrew them. I'm not really wanting to pursue entrepreneurship, just make a decent amount of money with not a lot of effort and ebay is all I can really think of. 

[fairfarmhand]

My degree was in merchandising, and I had a minor in business management. At this point I just want to make a little bit of money for the sake of doing so. Honestly nobody even knows about my selling on ebay except for a few family members.

 

Today I sold 2 things and for a total of $44 bucks, I paid $4 and we used them a couple times but the my kids outgrew them. I'm not really wanting to pursue entrepreneurship, just make a decent amount of money with not a lot of effort and ebay is all I can really think of. 

 

See, I'd rather ebay than join a MLM type thing. This way, people are buying stuff they're already looking for. And you're not hitting up friends and family for parties and such. Seriously, I think you have your answer. You can set your own hours, your own income level and still be available to do what you need to do for your family. If you need a break in the future for elder care or something else, you can do that.

[Liz CA]

Sounds like you are putting your degree to work. What would you be doing with this degree if you were employed? Would you be a buyer or more in the accounting field or something completely different?

Edited December 3, 2016 by Liz CA

[HSmomof2]

Sounds like you are putting your degree to work. What would you be doing with this degree if you were employed? Would you be a buyer or more in the accounting field or something completely different?

I agree. It sounds like you're good at what you're doing on eBay, and you enjoy it. I work part-time outside the home and would Love to be able to work from home. My dc are young teens now, and my working a set schedule in the afternoons/evenings is really a pain.

[G5052]

See, I'd rather ebay than join a MLM type thing. This way, people are buying stuff they're already looking for. And you're not hitting up friends and family for parties and such. Seriously, I think you have your answer. You can set your own hours, your own income level and still be available to do what you need to do for your family. If you need a break in the future for elder care or something else, you can do that.

 

I agree.

 

I work full-time teaching online, and I love being available to my family. At this point working away is not at all an option. I need my evenings and weekends free, and I need a lot of flexibility. I like that my prep work is done on my time, not a set schedule.

 

During the summer sometimes I don't have a contract at all, or if I do, it's at a far lower level. So I spend the summer selling on local Facebook swap pages, eBay, and Amazon. In the summer of 2016, I made just over two mortgage payments by selling things we already owned. Some of it was tools and such that were especially valuable, but I also sold over 200 books. We got those things out of the house to people that wanted them, and I was free to enjoy time off work too. Selling online works very well for me.

[City Mouse]

The eBay thing sounds great. It sounds like the perfect part time job-very flexible to fit around your family schedule

[angelica]

See, I'd rather ebay than join a MLM type thing. This way, people are buying stuff they're already looking for. And you're not hitting up friends and family for parties and such. Seriously, I think you have your answer. You can set your own hours, your own income level and still be available to do what you need to do for your family. If you need a break in the future for elder care or something else, you can do that.

 

I went to a mlm party recently and considered joining then I snapped out of it. I'm introverted and at end of the day it would have been more work than I have time and energy for. My grandparents are in their 80's so being available to take them to the grocery store or doctor when my mother can't is something I don't take for granted. I guess I just feel personal pressure to do something now to bring in extra money. I've noticed a lot of moms once their kids are in school it's all about selling this or that or being super involved in all their kids activities. We're just living life and busy without any activities so I don't know how some people do it.

 

Sounds like you are putting your degree to work. What would you be doing with this degree if you were employed? Would you be a buyer or more in the accounting field or something completely different?

 

I worked as a regional hr manager for a few years but I don't see myself going back. It was a job that fell into my lap and I was not even qualified for it but landed it because I was graduating and they felt confident in my skills. When I left that job I was 24 and annoyed that my subordinates didn't take me seriously. One worker even told me she wouldn't listen to a word I had to say because I was so much younger than her. I get it now, and took it personally but now it makes more sense to me.

 

I'd only been on my own for like two years and then suddenly I was working ft and a mom. It was like a bad dream but it was my life and there was no turning back. lt felt like everyone wanted a piece of me so when my man said it was okay to quit and stay home, I did. Considering I haven't worked in almost a decade and only worked briefly before then I don't even know what I'd be wanting to find a job in.

 

Honestly, I don't even really want to sell on ebay but if I can make some money while purging I feel I should do that. Then when I'm out shopping for our family and I come across something I know I can flip it's hard to not do that too. Me wanting to work is probably my way of wanting to escape my duties at home, but of course I can't even if I got a ft job.

 

I just feel like since I've been a sahm for all these years that I should be better at things like cooking, cleaning, organizing, and everything else that a parent does. I can go to goodwill and find some jeans to flip, but I can't bake a cake or make an awesome dinner to save my life.  

[Um_2_4]

I tried ebay, I wish that I could make it work. If I could I would be all over that in a heartbeat. But apparently, thrift stores around here are too $$$$, seriously. I read about stories on here where people find all these bargains and just go  :huh: . Here they presort and anything name brand gets sold online or in separate "stores" for much more. No accidentally finding name brand purses/shoes/jeans here. And walmart/target brand stuff starts at $3.99+ for infants, 5.99+ for adults sizes !!

 

I bought my oldest dd gymboree mainly (on sales) and saved for youngest dd. I thought I would ebay the pieces that are still very good, but nothing! I even had some still new with tags that were presents for the twins that they never wore and put them for .99 auctions and no takers!!!! I was going to auction my duplos, but decided to just keep them for grandkids at this rate.

 

If you can make ebay work, more power to ya!

[Jaybee]

 

 

I just feel like since I've been a sahm for all these years that I should be better at things like cooking, cleaning, organizing, and everything else that a parent does. I can go to goodwill and find some jeans to flip, but I can't bake a cake or make an awesome dinner to save my life.  

 

This is a different issue than wanting to bring in extra money. None of us are good at everything, even though it sometimes looks like it from the outside. (I would not be good at the ebay thing. Not at all.) If you are feeling bad about your homemaking skills, can you choose one thing to learn--tackle that, then go to the next? When I was a young mom, I felt overwhelmed. But somehow, over the years, learning one thing at a time, I grew in my skills at keeping the home running and organized. I got Don Aslett's Is There Life After Housework, and it helped with the cleaning as I slowly implemented it. Then I had an older mom nearby who loaned me some of her cookbooks, like La Leche League's Whole Foods for the Whole Family. And so on. It sounds like you just don't feel your worth right now?

[angelica]

This is a different issue than wanting to bring in extra money. None of us are good at everything, even though it sometimes looks like it from the outside. (I would not be good at the ebay thing. Not at all.) If you are feeling bad about your homemaking skills, can you choose one thing to learn--tackle that, then go to the next? When I was a young mom, I felt overwhelmed. But somehow, over the years, learning one thing at a time, I grew in my skills at keeping the home running and organized. I got Don Aslett's Is There Life After Housework, and it helped with the cleaning as I slowly implemented it. Then I had an older mom nearby who loaned me some of her cookbooks, like La Leche League's Whole Foods for the Whole Family. And so on. It sounds like you just don't feel your worth right now?

 

Your so right! Maybe it's not the money I'm after. The whole lack of making money all these years and realizing that has opened up a can of worms in me. I feel my worth but sometimes it's hard to understand that my role is bigger than a paycheck when I'm drowning running the household. I should probably read that book you suggested and focus on things I want to improve on and go from there. I can focus on my lack of cooking skills by driving out to my grandmas house one day and learning from her. Thanks for helping me realize some things! I shouldn't complain and define my worth by whether or not I work or not or how good I am at running a home. 

[angelica]

I agree.

 

I work full-time teaching online, and I love being available to my family. At this point working away is not at all an option. I need my evenings and weekends free, and I need a lot of flexibility. I like that my prep work is done on my time, not a set schedule.

 

During the summer sometimes I don't have a contract at all, or if I do, it's at a far lower level. So I spend the summer selling on local Facebook swap pages, eBay, and Amazon. In the summer of 2016, I made just over two mortgage payments by selling things we already owned. Some of it was tools and such that were especially valuable, but I also sold over 200 books. We got those things out of the house to people that wanted them, and I was free to enjoy time off work too. Selling online works very well for me.

 

That is inspiring to hear that you teach and sell during the summer! It really is amazing how quickly the money adds up. When your selling your own stuff it feels good to make a buck and clear the space. It's a win win for a situation where you could have easily have just donated the stuff and made nada. It is tedious work and not everyone has the patience to sell on all the many platforms available.

 

I tried ebay, I wish that I could make it work. If I could I would be all over that in a heartbeat. But apparently, thrift stores around here are too $$$$, seriously. I read about stories on here where people find all these bargains and just go  :huh: . Here they presort and anything name brand gets sold online or in separate "stores" for much more. No accidentally finding name brand purses/shoes/jeans here. And walmart/target brand stuff starts at $3.99+ for infants, 5.99+ for adults sizes !!

 

I bought my oldest dd gymboree mainly (on sales) and saved for youngest dd. I thought I would ebay the pieces that are still very good, but nothing! I even had some still new with tags that were presents for the twins that they never wore and put them for .99 auctions and no takers!!!! I was going to auction my duplos, but decided to just keep them for grandkids at this rate.

 

If you can make ebay work, more power to ya!

 

There's still hope even with walmart and target brands. Some of the target stuff sells very well actually. I've found that pricing too low makes people think there's something wrong with the item. Stores near me price high as well but they have dollar days and half off sales. 

[mommyoffive]

You have done amazing on Ebay.  Whatever you do keep doing that.  If only to make money getting rid of the stuff in your house.  

 

I think you really need to soul search and see what you want to do.  It sounds like you are conflicted on that.  

[LucyStoner]

eBay has changed a lot in the last decade. Things I used to sell there are now far easier to sell on FB for example.

Edited December 3, 2016 by LucyStoner