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Here it is : The first of many "I'm overcommitted what to do?" thread of the year


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Maybe not the first, but an early one for sure!

 

Daughter:

American Heritage Girls  Every other Monday plus service projects, badge work and more

Co-op Number One (across the street from us!) Weds and Thursday

Swimming (if she stick with this it'll be 3x per week)

 

Now we just joined co-op number two so that my son could take a composition class and we kind of ended up just having my dd take a hands-on Science class because we are "already there"  and the pay structure of this co-op makes you kind of feel like you should sign up for more, because the registration fees are higher.  The Science class for my dd is completely extra, and totally just fun.  My dd also wants to join the theater stuff there and help paint sets and do other projects with the theater group.  She is an artist and loves pretending so I can see why this appeals.

 

DS:

Co-op Number one (he bikes there himself)

Swimming (He bikes there, I pickup)

Co-op Number Two (for the advanced comp class)

 

So now I have commitments every single day of the week, and every single one of them requires significant parental volunteering.  Some more than others.

 

I did find out that my son could take the co-op class Number Two as a distance Learner.  He says he's really sad about not going in-person because he likes the teacher but that class is way out of the way and not around the corner, and on a Friday. And my dd could just quit co-op number two.

 

ON the other hand, if you look at the commitments above, it's my dd who really takes more stuff and requires more work from me.  SO maybe I should just tell her to drop something, and let it be her choice.  AHG teaches so many great things like loyalty and patriotism and community service.  BUT my dd is NOT a "box checker" and definitely bristles when I ask her to work on her badge projects. She does not care about filling up her sash and really couldn't care less about learning to fold the flag.  Yes, she does have some interest but not really all that much.

 

So option one:

Have dd quit co-op number two and ds go as a Distance Learner (looking ahead there is VERY little there that is really high level college prep so in future he likely won't do a lot there)

 

Option two:

Have dd quit AHG and plan on doing the theatre stuff with co-op number Two.  (BUT AHG is very tight knit and even though she is new they have really accepted and reached out to her and I have not seen that at the co-op Number Two)

 

Option Three:

Keep going to everything for a while and see how it goes. 

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I tend to try and stick it out when I sign on to too much, but I think quitting the co op will be easiest for you without the kids really missing out.

 

Have you asked their opinion? One may be more ambivalent about something than the other and it would be a good idea to get their perspectives before axing anything :)

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And for what it's worth I have almost no room to talk - this is the first semester I HAVEN'T been overbooked for activities, and in some sense we are making that up by doing a lot more school and with more kiddos. The lack of running around except Wednesday afternoon (piano and ballet) and Monday evening (ballet) has been incredibly awesome. I feel like we get so much more school done and I'm not snapping at everyone to hurry up constantly :o

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Hmmm good points. My dd did say she couldn't care less about earning badges. She said her only desire for this year is to do the cooking badge :) there are many other reasons to be part of and enjoy AHG both socially and for patriotism but if she does get to be in the play at Co Op number two, even as an animal or a tree she would be MORE than thrilled. And they already told her she would probably be welcome to paint sets etc.

 

I think maybe I better hold off on taking her out of co-op number two, until after the play to see how much she is included and enjoys it. By that time we will

Also have a better idea for AHG as well :)

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We have already dropped co-op (in fact we dropped it before it even started). Somehow every couple of years I get it in my head that we need something "more" when neither DD nor I really WANT a whole day out of the house. Co-ops sound amazing, but I'm going to really try to remember in the future that they just aren't for us!

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You also haven't written down what's great about co-op one, other than that's it's right across the street. It's two days a week, so dropping that (even just for one year) would free up a LOT of time.

 

Otherwise, it does sound like your daughter is much more interested in theater than AHG - you don't need to get a cooking badge to cook.

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You also haven't written down what's great about co-op one, other than that's it's right across the street. It's two days a week, so dropping that (even just for one year) would free up a LOT of time.

 

Otherwise, it does sound like your daughter is much more interested in theater than AHG - you don't need to get a cooking badge to cook.

You would think co-op number one would be the disappointment since it's partly secular (lots of Christians like us but also Muslims, gay, etc.)

 

But, it's actually awesome.  The atmosphere is familiar (it's at our own church), more fun (it has a park), more friendly (to me and to the kids), and the classes my dd takes there, she actually LOVES.  

 

But yes, you are right about AHG.  I am going to have to stick everything out for another month or two and see how theater goes.  If that is a hit and she's not excited about AHG I will probably encourage her to drop that.  :)

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I meant "a disappointment for us" because I am coming from the angle of what would seem a fit "for us" and not a fit "for us" and then I went on to say how friendly, welcoming and kind the community has been (which is standing out more than usual since Co-Op number two bills itself as loving, kind, and friendly, and good for Christians, etc.)  Also I have my own perspective of the "talk around town" about both communities and I am actually really confused.  What I have experienced, is so far the exact opposite of what the "talk around town" is.  

 

I do apologize for hurting your feelings.  ((hugs))  But also, I think if you re-read the post you will see that I came from my own perspective, that obviously what I was discussing was a disappointment "for us" 

 

 

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I meant "a disappointment for us" because I am coming from the angle of what would seem a fit "for us" and not a fit "for us" and then I went on to say how friendly, welcoming and kind the community has been (which is standing out more than usual since Co-Op number two bills itself as loving, kind, and friendly, and good for Christians, etc.)  Also I have my own perspective of the "talk around town" about both communities and I am actually really confused.  What I have experienced, is so far the exact opposite of what the "talk around town" is.  

 

I do apologize for hurting your feelings.  ((hugs))  But also, I think if you re-read the post you will see that I came from my own perspective, that obviously what I was discussing was a disappointment "for us" 

 

Yes. I just meant you might want to write down the words "for us", rather than just think them, because as written it comes across as if it's shocking that a secular group that includes Muslims and gays could be a good group.

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Ha, I beat you to it!  I've got the first "we're over-committed" thread of the year.  Check out my extended griping over on the high school board for some real entertainment.  But seriously...the ladies over there are very helpful in helping me prune and use my time more wisely because they are juggling high school course loads and have a ton of great ideas and have been there and done that.  That, and it seems we both need to commit to not joining everything next term.  Good luck with your pruning.  One suggestion over on the high school board that really resonated with me was reserving large blocks of time for school work so as to avoid time-wasting transitions.  That's something I am really going to focus on now.

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I would give it a little more time.  They all sound good, but it seems a bit early to decide about the 2nd co-op and AHG.

 

If your daughter doesn't end up loving the 2nd co-op, she could stay home and do her own work (or free reading etc.) that day, right?

 

From what I am reading, it does sound like AHG is a good fit for you, as long as you don't care when other girls have more badges etc.  And you/she can always change your mind about badges once you get used to the idea.  Many people find ways to work the badges into things they are already doing.  And in my experience, a fair amount of badge work is done as a group, which doesn't feel like a ton of effort.

 

As far as all the groups requiring volunteering from you - this is what would kill me, but is there perhaps a way around it?  Could you pay an opt-out fee or find some other way to shift the burden?

 

One thing I am exploring is being able to take on some badge work, not by becoming an expert and teaching it, but by arranging an activity at a local museum or national forest park or similar.  I am also doing the AHG newsletter this year, which is somewhat daunting, but at least I can do it at home.

 

Our first 2 years in AHG, I didn't do much volunteering at all.  I just couldn't.  Nobody complained.

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