MamaBearTeacher Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Because he says I know more than him. This conversation has happened several times and involve a lot of tears. I have tried to approach this calmly with logical responses and have pointed out that there are things that he knows more about than me, etc. Logic, calmness and empathy don't seem to be working. I am not a know-it-all, and I don't even retain a lot of factual info. But, yes, I do know more than him. He just demands that I tell him everything I know right away. Most of these conversations have ended by me changing the subject or getting him involved in something else but then he brings it up the next day. He has spent a lot of time lately on Wikipedia trying to learn "everything". He is not fond of books these days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I think it's probably just part of the self-awareness that happens developmentally as he begins to be old enough to take someone else's perspective--he is developing his own self-image, and in seeing his lack of knowledge, is trying to determine his worth. Just an idea. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Strawberry Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 He's going to have to work through this. Encourage him to increase his knowledge base. Don't try to talk him out of his feelings. Be understanding but do not engage. "You know more than me. (Whimper)" "Yes. When you are an adult, you will know a lot, too. That's why we are learning...now." "Whine, complain, it's not fair. I'm impatient and frustrated." "Learning takes time. Go read something." At some point you will need to talk about focus and gaps and individual strengths and weaknesses and the limits of human knowledge. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaBearTeacher Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 Latest conversation: Mommy, I love you even though you know more than me. I just want to ask you questions so I can learn. Me:great! Him: but, then when you answer I will become jealous and cry. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I think empathy for his (accurate) perception of the relative ignorance of being a child will do better than trying to talk him out of it. Encourage him to indulge his desire to learn. Say: "Learning everything is a great goal. What should we start with?" Cajun strawberry, above, has other good phrases. In addition, though, it's important to address his behaviour around this. If he is nerotypical, age 8 is no longer a time when a child freely makes his requests known through being rude and demanding. He should be re-scripted towards polite requests that his loved ones help him achieve his goals. (However crying when frustrated or overwhelmed is still perfectly normal, and so calls for comfort not correction: so there's a balance there.) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Latest conversation: Mommy, I love you even though you know more than me. I just want to ask you questions so I can learn. Me:great! Him: but, then when you answer I will become jealous and cry. You: Then I will hug you until your feeling storm is over, and then there will be plenty of time for more questions and answers. 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gil Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Wikipedia is a great resource but you should be aware that there is a lot of factual, well written articles for various aspects of pornography, sexual activity and sexuality--replete with semi-realistic illustrations of positions, links to other helpful websites and for some of the more anatomical stuff there are even educational but graphic video clips. Just an FYI. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Strawberry Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Wikipedia for Kids is the way to go here ^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ripley Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 My son is still like this with me, and he's a teenager LOL We've had the same conversation since he was 8. It's finally started sticking. Son pitches a fit and is upset I know more than he, or that I turned out to be right about something. Mom says, "Well I'm older. So there's that." Son doesn't find this helpful and whines that he just wants to beat me ONE.TIME!! Mom says, "Babe. Hon. We totally have the same goal. I want you to be smarter than me, too." Son doesn't believe me or understand, usually some combination of both. Mom says, "Biology, kid. I'm past my prime. I'm trying to give you all of the knowledge I have. So ... say it with me now ... YOU CAN BE SMARTER THAN ME." Son gets it for about two days before the cycle starts again. It's true, though. I tell him that it's all about genetics - I'm trying to put the best ones out there so we can attract the best ones out there :lol: . He gets a kick out of that and there's some truth to it. Plus when my mind goes to crap, I'm gonna need him to be smart enough to manage my care and stuff! So we still have the pain of having the conversation regularly, but I'm hopeful that he's come around to seeing that we're at least on the same team here. That we both have the end goal of wanting him to be smarter than me, and that he can get there faster if he lets me teach him everything I know (rather than fighting me on everything he doesn't.) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 Is he neurotypical? Anxious? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippen Posted May 25, 2015 Share Posted May 25, 2015 Is he neurotypical? Anxious? Inflexible? Tend to obsess over things? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.