Typical 6th Grade Boy Writing?

[DragonFaerie]

Can you guys please give me some feedback on DS's writing assignment?  I'd like to know if he is "on grade level."  He is in 6th grade, and this is his most recent paper on women's rights.  I have reviewed the paper, so I know about the mistakes.  I just want to know if this looks like typical 6th grade boy writing.  TIA!

 

 

 

     Before women had their right men would rule over them. They got their rights by protesting for 79 years. Many women were involved.

     There are many more things that happen to women, like staying home working while men were out getting drunk. What made them mad was that if you got married all your money would belong too your husband along with your possessions.

     They got their rights by making posters, marching to the white house, and having people sign potions. The finale thing was when a man signed a potion which was what they needed.

     The women involved [planed it] were Lucy Stone, Susan .B Anthony, and Sojourner Truth.  Lucy stone wanted to go to college like her brothers. When she got there got there she soon found out that she was a rebel. She also didn’t think that it was fair that men ruled over women. Susan .B Anthony was almost the same. She saw how hard her mother worked and her father pulled her from school and hired a teacher and started his own school. Sojourner Truth was born as a slave and the man she loved was forced to marry someone else. She had thirteen kids but most of them were sold at the slave trade.

     Now days they get all the things they didn’t get back then. They came along way since then and I am glad for that.

[Ethel Mertz]

I give him points for being funny (probably unintended) and sweet. I loved his work. I especially loved the "potions" part.

 

Even though DS is in 6th grade, I don't know how to assess your DS. Kids are so different in how they develop. I consider DS to be a bit below grade level. If I had to make a guess, I'd peg your DS a bit below grade level based on sentence structure and mechanics. Hopefully, others who have more experience evaluating writing will post.

 

However, I wouldn't panic if you end up deciding his writing is a bit below grade level. You've got a compassionate boy there and he was definitely successful in expressing his feelings!

[Pen]

I'd say Yes.

 

Some will be stronger writers, some weaker.

[DragonFaerie]

I give him points for being funny (probably unintended) and sweet. I loved his work. I especially loved the "potions" part.

 

Even though DS is in 6th grade, I don't know how to assess your DS. Kids are so different in how they develop. I consider DS to be a bit below grade level. If I had to make a guess, I'd peg your DS a bit below grade level based on sentence structure and mechanics. Hopefully, others who have more experience evaluating writing will post.

 

However, I wouldn't panic if you end up deciding his writing is a bit below grade level. You've got a compassionate boy there and he was definitely successful in expressing his feelings!

 

LOL.... He's been reading a lot of Harry Potter lately.  I think he meant "petitions." :D

[SparklyUnicorn]

How long did it take him to write this?  Is this a first draft?  What have you used for writing up until this point?

 

 

[Farrar]

Dodging the grade level question per se, but I can tell you from having taught sixth graders that many of them write about like that. He's not alone at that age in his writing level if that's what you need to know.

 

My fifth graders are writing about like this now... they have a reasonable sense of what they want to say but then they leave off so many details that it stops making sense in places or is so vague that it's meaningless.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Yeah it's very difficult to say if this is typical.  I have no clue whatsoever what is typical.  I have a 7th grader and a 4th grader currently. I could not tell you if my kids are typical!

 

It is not a terrible piece, but it would make a difference if this was something he wrote on the fly or this was his 10th revision.  KWIM?  

 

The topic is pretty mature IMO.  This is not the sort of thing I've yet asked my kids to write about.  

[DragonFaerie]

How long did it take him to write this?  Is this a first draft?  What have you used for writing up until this point?

 

He wrote a very general outline and then a rough draft.  Then he typed this, all without any input from me.  We're going to go over this, of course, but I have no frame of reference to know if he is doing okay or what.  That said, he hates writing, if that makes any difference.  As for what we're using, Writing Strands 3 (just started it a couple weeks ago) and Killgallon (he finished Story Grammar and has started on Sentence Composing for Middle School).

[DragonFaerie]

Yeah it's very difficult to say if this is typical.  I have no clue whatsoever what is typical.  I have a 7th grader and a 4th grader currently. I could not tell you if my kids are typical!

 

It is not a terrible piece, but it would make a difference if this was something he wrote on the fly or this was his 10th revision.  KWIM?  

 

The topic is pretty mature IMO.  This is not the sort of thing I've yet asked my kids to write about.  

 

He's doing US History this year.  His assignment was to read "If You Lived When Women Won Their Rights" along with coordinating pages in the Children's Encyclopedia of American History and the Choosing Your Way book.  We didn't go terribly in depth, and actually, he chose to write a 5-paragraph paper.  I originally assigned him one paragraph about Susan B. Anthony and one paragraph about Sojourner Truth.

[Farrar]

He wrote a very general outline and then a rough draft.  Then he typed this, all without any input from me.  We're going to go over this, of course, but I have no frame of reference to know if he is doing okay or what.  That said, he hates writing, if that makes any difference.  As for what we're using, Writing Strands 3 (just started it a couple weeks ago) and Killgallon (he finished Story Grammar and has started on Sentence Composing for Middle School).

 

Okay, ignore this if you want...

 

Knowing the context of the assignment is helpful for evaluating it. If he got zero support on it, I think he did a really good job. He made his own outline, which is pretty great - what a great skill! And it showed in the writing, which was clearly following a sense of organization that was really good.

 

But... for me, I think one place writing instruction goes wrong for a lot of kids is that we expect them to do it all alone too soon. I feel like when I've taught this age group, they need a lot more hand holding for various stages of the process. So, for me, I think I would have gotten involved earlier in the game. Assuming this is at least a semi-long term assignment (even if just a few days) then I would want to start with a conversation. What was interesting? What do you want to write about? And so forth. Basically, helping him plan and think about how to approach the writing. And then I'd want to help evaluate the outline, even if he could do it himself. I'd want to ask questions about it, see if he needed to add anything, etc. I think this sort of support is really positive for most kids. And it's not cheating. This is teaching. Again, just my opinion.

 

Also, was the assignment just to present the information? I think that's fine, though it's a tough one. We do this a good bit for quick narrations, but otherwise I think it's easier to give kids a venue so they can develop a voice for what they're writing. Like, is it the text of a children's book about women's rights? Is it a newspaper article about the history of women's rights? Is it maybe an imaginary short encyclopedia entry? The informational report always feels the hardest to me of all the various assignments we give kids because it's so untethered to any purpose. A thesis paper argues something, but I think a report is harder to do because it lacks a clear purpose.

 

But... ignore if you really see it differently.

 

ETA: I see you said what the assignment is. I think "five paragraph paper" is maybe holding him back here. It's a good training format for thesis/argument papers, but not a great one necessarily for an informational report, which is what this is.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I agree with Farrar.  I really have not expected this level of writing with minimal guidance.  My older kid is a very strong writer in terms of grammar, vocabulary, etc., but where he still needs a lot of guidance is organizing the overall piece.  It's easier when it is something he is familiar with or passionate about.  

 

So given the info I think it's probably very typical.  

 

 

[DragonFaerie]

Okay, ignore this if you want...

 

Knowing the context of the assignment is helpful for evaluating it. If he got zero support on it, I think he did a really good job. He made his own outline, which is pretty great - what a great skill! And it showed in the writing, which was clearly following a sense of organization that was really good.

 

But... for me, I think one place writing instruction goes wrong for a lot of kids is that we expect them to do it all alone too soon. I feel like when I've taught this age group, they need a lot more hand holding for various stages of the process. So, for me, I think I would have gotten involved earlier in the game. Assuming this is at least a semi-long term assignment (even if just a few days) then I would want to start with a conversation. What was interesting? What do you want to write about? And so forth. Basically, helping him plan and think about how to approach the writing. And then I'd want to help evaluate the outline, even if he could do it himself. I'd want to ask questions about it, see if he needed to add anything, etc. I think this sort of support is really positive for most kids. And it's not cheating. This is teaching. Again, just my opinion.

 

Also, was the assignment just to present the information? I think that's fine, though it's a tough one. We do this a good bit for quick narrations, but otherwise I think it's easier to give kids a venue so they can develop a voice for what they're writing. Like, is it the text of a children's book about women's rights? Is it a newspaper article about the history of women's rights? Is it maybe an imaginary short encyclopedia entry? The informational report always feels the hardest to me of all the various assignments we give kids because it's so untethered to any purpose. A thesis paper argues something, but I think a report is harder to do because it lacks a clear purpose.

 

But... ignore if you really see it differently.

 

ETA: I see you said what the assignment is. I think "five paragraph paper" is maybe holding him back here. It's a good training format for thesis/argument papers, but not a great one necessarily for an informational report, which is what this is.

 

Thanks so much for all this info.  I was actually surprised that he wanted to write a whole paper rather than just doing the two separate paragraphs I assigned.  I have been teaching him to use the outlines as a way to organize his thoughts no matter what kind of paper he's doing.  As for teaching him, I do provide guidance for his writing assignments, but I'm also trying to teach him to take on some things alone.  In this case, we'll edit this draft together so we can work on his sentence structure and some of the obvious mistakes. 

 

Thanks for the feedback, y'all!  It seems like he's pretty much where his average peers would be.  Makes me feel better.  We're doing something right. :-)

[Critterfixer]

 

But... for me, I think one place writing instruction goes wrong for a lot of kids is that we expect them to do it all alone too soon. I feel like when I've taught this age group, they need a lot more hand holding for various stages of the process. So, for me, I think I would have gotten involved earlier in the game. Assuming this is at least a semi-long term assignment (even if just a few days) then I would want to start with a conversation. What was interesting? What do you want to write about? And so forth. Basically, helping him plan and think about how to approach the writing. And then I'd want to help evaluate the outline, even if he could do it himself. I'd want to ask questions about it, see if he needed to add anything, etc. I think this sort of support is really positive for most kids. And it's not cheating. This is teaching. Again, just my opinion.

 

Too good not to quote. :hurray:

A thousand times THIS. The more complicated the topic or intricate the story, the more you have to guide every step of the way. 

 

This is why I take about three extra days to work through one of our CW Homer projects. It simply takes that long to read, think, outline, write, revise, think some more, write again, then edit, then rewrite...

If I had one thing to add to Farrar's excellent advice it would be to let the thing percolate. I think we often rush the process of thinking through a writing assignment. With more thought the outline gets improved. When the outline is improved, more material is digested and understood. I don't know if this is specific to boys or not, but my two are pretty random when it comes to writing unless they have a plan and plenty of time to chew on it. Maybe their minds jump around too much; I don't know.