Jump to content

Menu

CAP Fable - new thread for 2015


Recommended Posts

(The original thread from 2013-2014 can be found here.) Please share your child's compositions here!

 

We are new to this program. My 10yo son just completed the first lesson and is LOVING it. Here is his own fable from lesson 1:

 

The Mouse and the Bee

 

A Mouse lay in the warmth of the sun, dozing near an old barn. A Bee was lazily busing around, and lighted on the tip of the Mouse's nose. The Mouse's eyes popped open.

 

One moment, all the Bee saw here two round, beady eyes staring straight at him. The next moment, he was within the Mouse's grasp. No matter how much he writhed and twisted, he could neither free himself nor sting the Mouse.

 

The Bee decided to try to reason with the gray furry giant. "What can you hope to gain from killing me? I have done nothing to you. Let me go, and someday I will repay you." The Mouse smirked. "You amuse me. I'm too tired to kill you, anyway." He loosened his grip on the Bee, and went back to sleep.

 

Months passed. The leaves turned color, and the Mouse forgot all about his encounter with the Bee. The Bee, however, did not. He worked steadily in his hive, awaiting the day he would hold true to his promise to the Mouse.

 

He got his chance. The Bee was buzzing around in his usual way, when he saw an Owl swoop past, uttering a loud and fearful "WHO-WHO!" as if he were stalking his prey. "WHO dares to enter my domain? WHO?" Curious, the Bee followed him. Soon he found what the Owl was looking for: He recognized the Mouse, who was lying asleep. Then the Bee saw what the Owl was doing. It was about to pounce.

 

The Mouse woke up. The Bee expected him to scurry away, but he was too afraid. He stood there, riveted to the spot. Realizing that he had to act fast, the Bee rushed to the Owl and stung it. The Owl let out a terrible screech and started chasing the bee, mad with pain. The Bee flew around for a minute and then disappeared into a knothole.

 

When the Owl had left, the Bee came out and landed next to the Mouse. "Are you still amused?"

 

The Mouse shook his head. "Amazed would be more like it," he said.

 

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tibbie, your son picked some very strong verbs for his fable - nice work!  It is great to hear he is LOVING it.

 

We have not reached "loving it" yet with my 10 year old.  In fact, I'm still trying to get past loathing it.  We broke it up so that today (day 3) we did the re-write part of Writing Time and Speak-It of Lesson1.  It took 90 minutes to complete, with lots of hand holding, but at least there weren't any tears. Perhaps that is because I gave him a heads up a few times this week as to what the re-write would be like.  At any rate, I think he did fine, but for him is was the *most* I have seen him write ever.  I allowed him to copy sentence structure from the original because that helped keep his pen moving.  Here is his composition, with original spelling and structure:

 

The Mouse and the Ladybug

     A mouse scurried through the squishy marsh, his little paws speeding across the ground.  A tiny inattentive ladybug flying the opposite direction accidently flew into the mouse's mouth.  Hitting his brakes the mouse angrily spat out the ladybug and was about to trample the ladybug underfoot.

     "Please spare me!" begged the ladybug.  "Spare me and one day I shall surely repay you!"  

     The mouse was much amused to think that the ladybug could ever help him.  He laughed so hard that he fell and rolled on the ground!  But as he was generous, he let the ladybug go.

     Some days later, while walking across the wooden bridge, he fell off and into quicksand.  As he started sinking, he started to squeak loudly.  The ladybug knew the sqeak and quickly found the mouse struggling in the quicksand.

     The ladybug told the mouse to lie on his back and kick.  When the mouse was on the ground the ladybug said, "You laughed when I said I ould repay you.  Now you see that a ladybug can help a mouse."

 

 

edited to correct my typo

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 months later...

Sharing DD's rewrite of The Lion and the Mouse for anyone who might want to use it for comparison in the "Speak It" section. She's eight and in third grade. This took four 30-minute plus sessions to write: one to brainstorm and story map, one for DD to compose orally while I scribed, and two for her to copy the story in her own hand. Overall, I feel like CAP should have provided a graphic organizer or something to help guide the student. We ended up making a list of possible animals and thinking about their unique qualities. Then, we dissected The Lion and the Mouse line-by-line to use as a guide for a graphic organizer we filled in. Right now, I'm finding W&R and little difficult to use. DD likes it okay, but she's impatient with how long it takes to get through a chapter.

 

The Mouse and the Minnow
 
     A Mouse was eating a kernel of corn near a pond when a Minnow jumped out and landed on her head. The Mouse was really annoyed because she hated getting wet and started to stomp away.
     The Minnow flip-flopped furiously trying to get back in the water. "Please push me back into the water," he pleaded to the Mouse, "I'll surely repay you one day"
     The Mouse snorted at the Minnow's words, but being a kind mouse helped him anyway.
     After finishing her corn, the Mouse bent down at the edge of the pond to get a drink. A startled frog hopped into the water and made a big splash. A wave caused by the splash made the Mouse tumble into the pond. She screamed because she could not swim. The Minnow heard the screaming and came to her rescue. The Mouse grabbed the Minnow's back fin and he towed her to shore.
     "You snorted when I said I would repay you," said the Minnow. "Now you see that even a Minnow can help a Mouse."
 
Good golly...it looks so much shorter typed out!
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hey Pitter Patter!   Thanks for sharing.   I actually think that she did a great job:  Excellent verb choice, strong and interesting sentence construction, a story that MAKES SENSE and has a clear beginning and end---just wonderful!   That looks like what some people are producing at the END of fable from what I have seen---not the first assignment.   So again, great work.  

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

Adding DD's "The Hunter and the Doves" amplification in case someone would like to use it for Speak It. Again, she is 8 years old. We spent two 30-minute sessions talking through the assignment with me as scribe. She spent another 30-minute session writing it out in her own hand.

 

I'm still not loving W&R's lack of implicit instruction in the writing sections. There needs to be charts or graphic organizers or something to better guide the student. The parent is left organizing the brainstorming. The writing samples in the teacher's guide go beyond the instruction level provided.

 

-----------------------------

 

The Hunter and the Doves
 
     A small flock of gray Doves spotted some sunflower seeds scattered on the frozen ground. When they flew down to eat the delicious seeds, a bearded Hunter dressed in furs hid in the oak tree above the birds. He dropped a rough rope net upon them. The trapped birds started to panic, but the wise, old King Dove sat calmly. The Hunter laughed so hard at the Doves's terror that he fell out of the tree. The King Dove saw his chance, so he called to the other Doves to each lift up a string of the net and flap her wings. By doing this, the Doves were able to lift the net together and carry it off as they escaped to their winter home.
 
MORAL: By working together, great things can be achieved.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

Pitter, thanks for posting that. I read it to my kids after they wrote their own versions and they really enjoyed it - especially the part about the hunter falling out of the tree giving the doves more time. They thought was genius :) I enjoyed the added adjective in "delicious seeds". We brainstormed all kinds of adjectives one could use with seeds but never thought about taste!

 

l'll add in a few "Hunter and the Dove" stories as well. The endings are a little weak, but for one of their first writing efforts, they're not bad.

 

Written by my 8yo ds:

 

A small flock of doves was flying as quick as an arrow across the plains. They were starving. One of the doves spotted a blue cob of corn on a patch of moss. When they flew down to gobble up the seeds, a hunter hiding in the tall grass threw a rope net over them.

 

"Help! Help! We're trapped!" said the doves in a panic. Keeping his head, the King Dove told the other doves to each lift a rope and flap her wings. They worked very hard and were able to lift the net together, as a team. They flew off together and dropped the net into a lake.

 

Written by my 9yo dd:

 

One hot day a flock of gray doves were flying. They spotted some purple corn seeds on the grassy ground. When they flew down to eat the seeds, a young hunger hiding in a tree dropped a string net upon them.

 

"Help! Help! We're trapped!" said the doves in a panic. They flapped and chirped and scrambled. Keeping his head, the King Dove told the other doves to each lift up a string and flap her wings. They worked very hard and were able to lift the net off the ground as a team. They flew off together and dropped the net into a lake.

 

Moral: When you work as a team, you can do amazing things.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...