Do your kids work independently?

[Minerva]

How much independent work do your kids do? How important is it to you that they work independently? What simple steps did you do to help them transition towards independence (or not)? 

 

My daughter who is nine does most of her work with me still. She is dyslexic and so there is some amount of work that she absolutely needs me to help her decipher; however, there are areas where she could work alone, but I find that if I leave her to do them by herself they take a looooong time to finish and the general enjoyment level goes way down. Since the goal for me has always been maintaining her love of learning, I haven't really stepped out of the picture yet, but I am also aware that she might need a nudge to help her learn to work autonomously.

 

Thanks.

[Chrysalis Academy]

My 8 year old does very little independent work.  I will step away to do a chore while she's copying something or doing a math page, but that's about as far as her independent work goes.  It's not that she can't do the work without help, but she does need the encouragement, company, or whatever to stay on task and work efficiently.  ETA: This is for seatwork - she reads and listens to audiobooks independently each day.

 

My almost 12 year old has been working entirely independently this year, except for things we want to do together because we're learning together, or discussions of course.  We meet each day to discuss lit, go over her writing, etc. but the work she manages on her own.  I do spend time teaching her when she is learning a new skill (writing essays, taking notes from lectures) but I do not sit with her day to day as she does her work.  I do have to keep an eye to make sure her productivity isn't slipping because of procrastination, too much computer time, etc. but other than that she is independent.

 

For my older, it was a process - she started hs at 9, and did almost nothing independently in 4th grade, and then a little bit in 5th, more in 6th, and now she is where she is.  It happened very gradually.  So, for what it is worth, that is my experience with my n=1 learning to work independently!

 

I really like SWB's audio lecture on this topic, if you haven't heard it you might enjoy it.  She discusses the process of teaching kids to work independently as a very gradual one!

 

http://peacehillpress.com/index.php?p=product&id=125

[OneStepAtATime]

This entirely depends on the child, the specific thing they are learning, etc.  I have two dyslexic children.  DD14 still needs me for several things but she is finally working pretty independently on several items now.  DD10 still needs me, too, but his needs are also social.  He learns better around others.  DD not so much.  I am fairly certain that DS will always need someone around whenever possible.

 

Does she listen to audio books?  Does she learn well that way?  DS does like to have independence in his reading so he has a Kindle and listens to audio books or reads them with Immersion reading where the text is synced with the audio.  We still do read-alouds, too, but he loves being able to listen to a book of interest without being dependent on me.  Unfortunately, DD does not learn well that way at all and hates just listening for pleasure.  She cannot process the spoken words efficiently enough for it to be any fun.

 

What specific areas were you trying to have her work on alone?

[MinivanMom]

My 9-yr-old is fairly independent, but I am always nearby and available. I start him out each morning by going over any new math concepts with him, and then he works through his assignment independently. This year he has a daily checklist, and that has helped with him knowing what to do next. I'm supposed to check each assignment before he moves onto the next subject, but if I'm busy with someone else, then he will just move onto the next assignment until I'm available to work with him. All of his curriculum is fairly independent, though, except for history and science which we read and discuss together. This is probably our last year of doing that. We are trying to move toward less reading aloud and more discussing literature, less me spoon-feeding him facts & knowledge and more discussion of the big concepts. I'm further along in that transition with his older sister, so I do feel like I have an idea of what we're working toward.

[Minerva]

Thanks for the responses!

 

I think we are moving in the right direction. Baby steps towards independence.

 

My daughter listens to audio books all the time by herself. OneStepAtATime, can you tell me about the Immersion books? How do I find this option? I have heard of it but always assumed that the reader will go way too fast for my dd. My daughter just got a Kindle....

 

All of your responses make me feel better about our slow path to independence. I see a lot of families with checklists and work boxes and realize we are a long way off from making this work for us, but that's okay.

 

 

[Wildiris]

My DD-11 works independently out of necessity. How I define independent: I go over lessons for the day in the AM, explaining and doing math or LA exercises which demonstrate the lesson for the day. History is reading, note taking and summarizing, plus working on a timeline as her project. Science is most hands-on. New this year to us, I use myHomework app so she can see and check off daily assignments.

[In2why]

I was concerned about that this year since my son is 11.  One thing that is working for us, is that I am giving him homework every night.  He likes feeling like the other kids in the neighborhood since he knows that they have homework.  Usually it is a reading comprehension worksheet, or math practice from Key to Fractions.  I make sure it is something he can easily do alone.   Sometimes he will ask me a question and I tell him to reread the directions or look at the examples and if he still can't get it then we will go over it the next day.  His perfectionist tendencies make it difficult, but I think this is making it easier.  I am hoping that it translates into more independence.  

 

Another thing we do since he gets distracted easily and wants to stop in the middle of a lesson or work to discuss anything and everything, is to keep a spiral notebook beside him so he can write any questions that pop into his mind.  That makes him consider how important it really is to talk about it right that minute. 

[HS Mom in NC]

Independence has an element of intellectual understanding and some amount of self-motivation/self-discipline.

 

 

If your child can understand and do all these things then he/she is probably able to do the assignment on their own:

1. The child watched or heard you model any new concepts.

2. The child read aloud to you the directions and explained them to you in his/her own words.

3. The child looked at and explained the examples to you.

 

 

These are some different stages of self-motivation/self-discipline:

1. Do 1 assignment on their own in the same room as mom.

2.  Do several assignments on their own in the same room as mom.

3. Do several assignments in a room without mom but mom watches over the child from another room to make sure the child is on task.

4. Do several assignments in any room of the house without mom watching over.

5. Do a week's worth of work and complete it by a deadline without mom in the room or watching from another room.

[purduemeche]

Our oldest is ten and this is the first year he really works independently.  DS9 is ESL so does very little alone, but DS8 can do almost all of his math and language arts alone.  Depends on the child, but around ten is a good starting point for this transition.

[MiMi 4under3]

I sit with DD13 for 80-90% of her work. Even when I'm not directly teaching or helping, I sit next to her. She likes the company and I often give reminders like, "You're on number 17, stop looking out the window," or "OK, next one, stop wasting time."  

 

 

[MotherGoose]

My oldest is 8 (3rd grade). I am required to teach most things. We are using Math in Focus, Sequential Spelling, FLL, and things that require me. We are doing MOH as part of a coop, and Nancy Larson Science. What I do to encourage independence is to give her some morning work that's independent which she does in her room while I work with my Ker. She, depending on mood, is much better able to focus in her room than in the room with us. For the morning work it's yesterday's math worksheet, math facts review, thinking skills, Wordly Wise, etc. She is able to do those independently but sometimes chooses to waste her time. She has no special needs. If she chooses to waste her time then she has to do the work later during free time. She's a talker, and would love for me to sit with her through the entire process, but it would take FOREVER if we did it that way. It's interesting, my Ker, I predict, will want to and will be able to be much more independent at younger age. She's not as much of a talker, and really wants to finish a page if we start it. Oldest could care less :) She's "perfect Paula" if you've read Cathy Duffy's discussion of learning styles. Oldest is a cross between wiggly Willy and Sociable Sue.

[ScoutTN]

My 9 yo fourth grader does memory work, literature, history and science reading and penmanship independently. These are things she likes and is good at. She can do them in another room and stay on task.

Math practice sheets or problems require my presence, though not my help, because she doesn't really like math.

 

We do spelling amd Latin together because of the curriculum I have chosen, though I think she could do these subjects with some degree of independence with other materials.

 

We plan on doing a little bit more independently each year. Incremental shinfts as I see her intellectual ability and motivation/ self-discipline growing.

[kirstenhill]

I think a lot depends on the individual child, their personality and the needs of the family. My DD started expressing a desire for more independence in third grade (and even a bit in 2nd grade).,Now as a 10 year old/5th grader she is pretty independent for many subjects. Her personality reflects this in activities outside of school as well though. And it has a down side that she has to try most things herself first with no help, even if it means falling flat on her face first because it was a task or activity that was unrealistic for a ten year old to do without help. However, with her being the oldest of four, even if she didn't want lots of independce anyway, I would need to gently move her in that direction in order to have time for her younger brothers.

 

My next child, DS7, is much less eager for independence. I ask him to do a few simple things on his own while I am working with DS5 (reading quietly, xtra math or spelling city on the computer, sometimes a review page for math or an easy geography worksheet)...but he doesn't really prefer even that amount of working alone. If he were the youngest, he probably would end up with me at his side constantly. But by necessity of needing him not to answer/make unwanted remarks to DS5 during his school work, I need to keep him productively engaged alone for at least a bit of time each day.

[Farrar]

Another vote that this is so individual.

 

My 10 yos do some things independently - some of their math, piano practice, some of their writing, some of their reading. I'm sure I could push them to do more independently, but it's a balance. They learn more when I'm there to push them and keep them on track. They do all of spelling with me, some of their math, some of their writing, all of writing revisions, and some of the reading is still aloud for science and so forth.

 

This is so simple that it sounds completely pointless, but I swear it made a huge difference for us - I have a special mark next to the daily tasks that are expected to be independent. That was really key in helping them take the first steps to learn to do independent work - to see what could be done independently. Another thing that helped was that I started leaving them alone with work to do once a week to go to yoga in the morning. It has been really good for them to have to troubleshoot their own problems instead of just immediately giving up and coming to me.

 

My hope is that in a couple of years they'll be doing even more independent work. However, I've learned not to assume too much about this thing called homeschooling. Things that I thought would be a certain way haven't turned out that way at all and I wouldn't be surprised if this was no different.

[Chrysalis Academy]

Another vote that this is so individual.

 

My 10 yos do some things independently - some of their math, piano practice, some of their writing, some of their reading. I'm sure I could push them to do more independently, but it's a balance. They learn more when I'm there to push them and keep them on track. They do all of spelling with me, some of their math, some of their writing, all of writing revisions, and some of the reading is still aloud for science and so forth.

 

This is so simple that it sounds completely pointless, but I swear it made a huge difference for us - I have a special mark next to the daily tasks that are expected to be independent. That was really key in helping them take the first steps to learn to do independent work - to see what could be done independently. Another thing that helped was that I started leaving them alone with work to do once a week to go to yoga in the morning. It has been really good for them to have to troubleshoot their own problems instead of just immediately giving up and coming to me.

 

My hope is that in a couple of years they'll be doing even more independent work. However, I've learned not to assume too much about this thing called homeschooling. Things that I thought would be a certain way haven't turned out that way at all and I wouldn't be surprised if this was no different.

 

This has been key to the transition here, too.  Shannon has had a 2-column list for the last two years, independent work and together work.  The balance has shifted to the left column, so that the right hand column is almost entirely discussion, new skills, and oral work and everything else is on the left.

 

I think I'll do the same thing for Morgan starting next year in 4th, though most of her things will be in the left column.  At this point, her beginning on this path is her Friday list.  I work friday, so I leave her a list of things to do - Math review pages, grammar worksheets, spanish worksheets, cursive practice.  It's a short list, and it's all stuff I know she can do alone.  It is still hard for her, but she will learn over the course of this year to do that stuff on her own, and will gradually be able to do more.

 

It's not my goal to have them working entirely independently, but it is my goal  to move them toward the ability to learn indpendently, to self teach, to be autodidacts, which is an important life skill they will apply till the day they die, and a major goal of homeschooling for us.  At this point, it's a balance, and I'm taking the long view.

[Cottonwood]

Maturity, understanding, motivation...all different per child.  My 13 yr old DD is completely independent this year except for a thing or two I prefer to go over with her daily.  She would do those alone, but I'm not convinced she's retaining, so that's my decision.   Last year, she worked somewhat independently.  My 11 yr old DS is on his first year back to HSing and needs my prompting about 30% of the time.  OP, at your DC's age, they would have needed me the whole time.  It'll come....  Give a little more until they pick it up on their own.  I think you'll know.  I wasn't sure last year w/ DD but this year, I totally know.  She picks it up and just goes with it all by herself.

[SparklyUnicorn]

The 9 year old, not at all.  The 12 year old more so, but I'm not talking independent in the sense I hand him the materials and check in with him once in awhile or never.  I'm on top of what he is doing, but I don't need to sit next to him with every single thing.  I still in general sit with him or work with him on a lot of things though. 

 

 

[Dory]

My 10yo ds is pretty much independent. I have to remind him to check his list once or twice to make sure everything has been done, and I stay available to help him with new concepts. My 9yo dd is really independent. If I disappeared it would take her a week for the thought to even wander through her head that maybe she doesn't need to keep doing all that school work. My 7yo ds is not independent at all. I don't teach him much (teaching him always ends up with me angry and him crying), but if I am not within arms reach he won't stay focused at all. He has the focus of a gnat.

[violamama]

Yes, for short bursts. We have recently started emphasizing it because it seems to increase their enjoyment & motivation. If it didn't, I don't think I would worry too much about it, to be honest.

The 8 year old reads, does math, practices piano, does copywork, and practices memory work. These are all at most 15-20 minutes before I check in. Not sure it counts as independent, but it feels like a good start. 

 

The 6 year old would like to not only be independent but also supervise everybody else. His management style leaves something to be desired.

 

The 1 year old is independently cute. 

 

[Mommy22alyns]

Both girls do all their morning work (LA/math) pretty independently.  They started late last year in 3rd and 5th grades.

[Shellydon]

My 12 year old is 90% independent, my 10 year old is 60% idependent.  My 2nd grader needs me to explain, then is able to go on her own.  K'er needs me 100 %