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I never thought I'd be researching homeschooling again...but I need your help


Momma4Boys
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OK - quick back story...I have 4 sons and we are a military family. I homeschooled all of them at one time but when we moved to San Antonio the schools we were in were so fabulous that all 4 boys went to public schools - and did really well. Fast forward 2 years later and we are now in South Korea in an American DOD school. 3 of my kids are thriving and doing fine but my 2nd son, who is in 7th grade, is struggling.

 

He has always been a slow learner - he hates to read & write - but he is intelligent. We had him tested for dyslexia many years ago but that came back negative. He is not an auditory learner at all. What is happening here is that the school has A & B days where they do some subjects on A days and other subjects on B days. The idea is that they can spend more time discussing and have an extra day to do homework. Great idea in theory...but what is actually happening is the teachers are covering 2 chapters or 2 ideas in 1 day and then loading on tons of homework (since they have an extra day to do it) - but all of the classes do this so it creates, for my son, 3-4 hours of homework every evening. For a kid who really doesn't love school this is torture! Most kids here probably don't spend that amount of time on homework, but my ds does.

 

SO - I offered to homeschool him and he is seriously considering it.

 

Back to my research question - I really don't have the resources here to have him professionally tested. And I need something good for distance learning, slow learners and hesitant reader/writers. I also want something that is easy to move into high school - with record keeping & such.

 

Things I have used in the past which were ok but not fabulous for us (cause I'm not a very good homeschooling mom - I'll be honest) - TOG, Veritas Press, MUS (loved MUS until I put my kids in public school and they were SUPER far behind - the way it spirals knowledge is different)

 

 Can you guys help me please? Give me options to research? My hopes for him in the future are either college - but I can really see him becoming a police officer, fireman, chef etc - things that are more hands on and don't require years and years of college.

 

THANKS so much!!

 

Nicole

 

~ Military Spouse with 4 awesome sons ages 15, 13, 10 & 9 ~

 

 

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Well how far out of the box do you want to go?  On the one hand you're saying you want records to slide him into high school.  On the other hand, you're describing a scenario that would respond really well to out of the box teaching and customization.  Personally, I'd be inclined to BEND a lot and make that happen.  

 

I agree math is important.

I agree the ability to read something and comprehend it is important.

I would add it's important to become GOOD at something and know who you are and that you have something to give to the world.

 

Beyond that, it's all optional.

 

Compromise, bend, rethink, re-envision.  That's my advice.  It's what I do with my dd, and it's what I see my friends doing in similar situations.  No, it's very hard to get traditional curriculum to work for us.  It *can* be done, yes, because she technically has the reading level.  It's just she'd move through it with no joy, no zip, and no retention.  I try to pick those battles REALLY CAREFULLY and make sure they mattered.  I try to flex or do out of the box anything that can reasonably be done that way.  

 

Ideas to consider?  

 

-Bio 101 and Chem 101 dvds.  My dd really, really enjoyed these and seemed retain well with them.  

-Walch Powerbasics--Some are great for high school and a few you might prefer for junior high.  Just depends.  Use them as a starting point and flesh out, adding read alouds, videos, whatever.

-consider interest-driven studies

-consider having him log time pursuing topics online that interest him.  For instance, there are TONS of videos online for free on the topic of Intelligent Design.  There are SO many videos available online now, you could literally just find your interest, look on youtube, and keep plenty busy.  This is 7th grade, not grad school!  It's good enough, fun, and memorable.

-consider local history or field trips.  I haven't been to South Korea, but surely it would fascinating to study?  

-Audible for literature--Pair it with the ebooks and do immersion reading, or let him listen to the audiobooks while he does other things with his hands.  

-get him doing things with his hands!  It sounds like he wants to.  Chem labs, kids, tearing apart motors and old junk, whatever.

-typing--Actually more important than writing at this age.  

-subscriptions to interesting e-magazines--He might like the Make It magazine (is that the name?), Muse, etc.  

-use something extremely high interest to spawn his writing.  I had my dd outline Muse magazine articles at that age.

-metronome work--Heathermomster has instructions on the board here to do it for free, and you can add in digit spans.  Highly, highly, highly recommend.  Costs you nothing and it *may* give you a bump.

-assume there's adhd and teach and make changes appropriate to it.  Since that's the label of exclusion and you've already excluded some stuff, you might as well assume it and make the changes.  Clear structure, doing things that engage him, eliminating transitions, helping him through initiation humps, allowing for low processing speed and fatigue, making sure his school work doesn't consume so much of his life that he doesn't have time to do his own thing, using his own thing as much as possible to drive everything else.  The changes won't hurt anyone, but if he actually does have a SN like adhd, they might help.   :)

 

Hmm, anything else?  Like I said, just to pick up TOG or whatever and have it work, I wish.  I LOVE that structure!  But dd seems to do better when she's more engaged.  She's such a fantastic learner when she's engaged, I hate to screw with that and turn EVERYTHING into a battle of "but the curriculum says you must learn this."  So we have a few things in the suck up Buttercup category and a lot more things in the do it our way and the way that engages her.

 

Kids that age like controversy.  My dd enjoyed mindbenders at that age.  I had a book of 50 debate prompts and we'd do one every few days, just reading and arguing.  It's a good age for arguing.   :D

 

Don't be afraid to have fun.  Don't be afraid to let him be who he is and become someone radically different with a radically different path.

 

I posted a link to our current year's syllabi and stuff http://1drv.ms/1tUiTFo  Maybe it would give you ideas?  For instance, I took the typical biology text, subbed out most of the chapters for videos or other (more engaging) books, added in this and that.  Under the gov't tab you'll see how I souped up the otherwise really humble Powerbasics Govt.  Aesthetics is an art+ philosophy credit I made her using a book I thought she'd like.  That's for 10th grade, not 7th.  Main thing I'm encouraging you to take from it is how comfortable it *can be* to take something you know he'll click with and CHUNK it.  I'm always looking for things I can chunk for her.

 

Oh, oh, you know what we LOVED for a couple years around that age?  Opera!!!!!!!!!!!!  Seriously, she read opera stories for two years.  Gilbert & Sullivan would work.  Art history would work.  Anything kind of different that engages their brain.  We did quite a bit of shakespeare (just the comedies) one year.  You can google for guides for each play and use them while watching the Ambrose productions.  The Ambrose productions are FABULOUS and you can rent and watch them online for maybe $3 a pop.  Highly, highly recommend!!!!!!  My dd had read the picture books and summaries first, so then we watched and discussed with the guides.  Both opera and those shakespeare plays have a lot of humor.  It's such a tumultuous age, so humor is good.   :)

 

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This is 7th grade, not grad school!  It's good enough, fun, and memorable.

 

This is why I love this forum and group of people! Such thought out, constructive help!! Thank you OhElizabeth! Now, what you are proposing DOES scare the bageebies out of me BUT you have made some wonderful points and I am going to research it more.

 

I love your quote above - it is EXACTLY how I feel - thank you for saying it and confirming that I'm not the only parent out there that feels that way.

 

I look forward to digging into your link and seeing how you make your school happen for your daughter.

 

Thanks again!

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Just to follow up LizB, if you were here in the US we'd suggest you see a developmental optometrist, just to make sure there's not a physical reason for his dislike of reading.  Not sure what your options are in Korea.  If you have reason to think there are issues (turning head to use just one eye, complaining of headaches, etc.), you could get the book off amazon and just implement it yourself.   

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more great info - thank you! btw - OhElizabeth - I have never seen OneNote and it looked AWESOME! It looked like it would make what you are suggesting I try with my ds much more manageable!

 

My son has seen a regular optometrist and was fine and he did a see a developmental optometrist a few years ago when we lived in San Antonio (I should have mentioned that - sorry). He had a slight depth perception issue but nothing major. I'll ask a few of my Korean friends to see if they have such a thing here :) Great advice!

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Nope, Timberdoodle sells the Bio 101 and Chem 101 dvds.  Maybe you can find them directly from whoever made them as downloads?  Dunno.  

 

Glad you like OneNote!  Free and yes, makes this much more doable, whew!

 

Hmmm, a "slight depth perception problem"??  Sounds like he could use a fresh developmental vision eval or at least a screening.  I'd be wondering about his convergence, etc.  It would really suck to have a kid hate reading, struggle with this and that, and it turns out it's actually a vision problem.  My dd had no true depth perception and it was because her eyes weren't converging and working together correctly to create it.  So to me that's a little eye-brow raising.  If there were an easy way to get it checked, it would be nice.  I'm not sure in Korea there is, lol.  That's where I go back to the VT at home book.           Developing Ocular Motor and Visual Perceptual Skills: An Activity Workbook       If you've got the change lying around and can get it shipped to you, this would be the book.  If there's nothing going on, the activities will be easy and he'll blow through them.  If there's something going on, you'll be catching it.  At least you know, having seen a developmental optometrist, that you're probably not missing some other, major problem.  I'm just saying it's an option to consider.  I got the book myself to run my ds through the visual perception exercises.  We'll start after he gets his neuropsych eval next month.  

 

Sounds like you're doing great with all this!  Keep popping back in with your questions and we'll cheer you on!  :)

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So - no luck finding a developmental optometrist here in Korea - I may get that book you recommended OhElizabeth! Thanks for letting me know about it! It's a little pricey but if it helps my son then obviously it would be worth it :)

 

Wow! ElizabethB - what an awesome site your 40L is! I gave all my kids the Quick Screen Reading Grade Level Test:

My 15 year old 10th grader scored 11.6 grade level

My 13 year old 7th grader scored 4.4 grade level

My 10 year old 5th grader scored 5.7 grade level

My 9 year old 3rd grader scored 4.0 grade level

 

So clearly you can see which one is struggling in school :( Makes me sad that it has taken me THIS LONG to figure this out!

 

I had him take the New Elizabethian Test A & B - I have no clue how to score it tho...he did fairly well (better than I thought he would) but he did miss one word per line on average. I see that the lessons coorispond with the lines - I can start with the lessons on your 40L site. But what else should I do?

 

An example of the words he missed are:

potmets (he added an extra syllable - like pottamets)

utbon (same - uttenbon)

id - said eyed (long i)

Vi - said with short i sound

lune - said lun (short u sound)

mew - said mee

poy - said po (long o)

tawmoil

vor

midder

tortex

marden

gnu (pronounced the g - that one is an easy one to fix - he missed all the gn combo words)

etc....

 

So what do you think? He spelling is also pretty terrible. I didn't test him on spelling but I know from some of his school writing.

 

You guys are so wonderful - thanks for all that you do (for me and everyone else out there)!!

 

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Another quick question for you guys - "Suck it up, Buttercup" (I love that btw) subjects would be math, reading/writing & typing for a 7th grader?? Anything else? I mean, I'll cover things like science, history and stuff but maybe not a rigorously as SIUB subjects - is that what you mean?

Well I guess my perspective is different, because 7th grade was when we fell apart and had evals.  I don't think there's ANYTHING that year that has to be "suck it up, Buttercup," and I think it's more important to come out with an intact, honest relationship of give and take and him knowing you're in his camp than it is to get work done even.  All is not lost if you lose a year of math, but all is lost if you lose your RELATIONSHIP.  

 

I was just reading Barkely's book Taking Charge of ADHD and he says the same thing.  He sites the example of people who get to the sporting class on time but ruin their relationship with their child in the process.  Would have been better to be LATE but arrive with your relationship intact.

 

At least think about it.  We're doing 10th now.  Our 7th grade fell apart (and 6th grade was awful) and it doesn't matter now AT ALL.  Not at all.  It really doesn't.  You could do videos and read alouds, 20 minutes of math together on a whiteboard every day, take nature walks and field trips, things you can get done, giving yourself time to find out what's going on, giving yourself a chance to get an honest dialogue going, and he will be FINE in 9th.  Totally fine.  And that's what I would do personally.

 

I'd focus on routines.  

-how does he feel when he wakes up?

-how much sleep does he need?

-when he wakes up how long until he feels ready to work?

-if you made a list of 3 hours of things to do together that were all high interest (videos, read alouds, field trips, and that 20 minutes of math) when we he feel comfortable starting?

-are there things he feels are giving him problems he would like help with or like to problem solve?  Not academics but things like: when I sit I feel like I have ants crawling on my legs.  When I read I see double.  When I write, my hand hurts.  When I read it puts me to sleep.  When I try to write a composition I can't pull anything out of my head.  When I read my science I NEVER know the answers to the questions. I want to work hard for you but I HATE all the stuff we do.

 

This is the age to develop an honest raport, get those things out in the open, and start talking and working together as a TEAM.  You want to FACILITATE his SUCCESS.  Not badger him under duress.  Facilitate his success.  So start thinking in terms of what's holding him back from being successful, what you would need to change for him to be successful, getting him to verbalize what he needs to be successful.

 

Kids WANT to please, and we have to make it so they CAN.  It is an unenviable position to be in where everything is an uphill slog, you're always the bad one, and nothing works.  Change that.  Make work doable.  Make it so he CAN please you.  Change the assignments, the materials, the amount of structure, the start time, the finish time, the whatever, till he CAN PLEASE YOU without extremity, duress, torture, or feeling like he's a failure.  

 

When you get that environment flipped, they get more confident and their natural go starts to kick in.  Then they try new things and try harder for you on the hard things, because they know you're in their camp and TRYING to problem solve.

 

Gotta go.  The runt came out and said he wants to do school work!   :)

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I would have him also take the MWIA level 2, pages 7 and 8. Print 2 copies of, each of these pages and mark any errors on your copy, if possible try to write the mistake made above the actual word. It is very important to get a time for each section, also take at least a 1 minute break, but 5 is better, between the two sections.

 

http://www.donpotter.net/pdf/mwia.pdf

 

After know the WPM rates and errors made on the MWIA I will be able to make better recommendations, but he can definitely start with my phonics lessons!

 

Also, did he have any speech problems when he was younger? And, how was he taught to read and were any sight words taught as wholes when he learned to read?

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Have you had his hearing screened with a good audiologist? Do they even have any in Korea?

 

Can he hear the difference between the following words and syllables:

 

ban pan; cab cap

 

Dat bat; add at

 

Jump chump; aj ach

 

Van fan; aff av

 

Gate Kate; frog frock

 

Zip sip: his hiss

 

Pan pen pin pon pun

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You can print out and plan to use numbers 2 to 9 linked on the bottom of my how to tutor page.

 

http://www.thephonicspage.org/On%20Reading/howtotutor.html

 

The Webster speller is useful for all my remedial students but I use different versions for different underlying problems. For severe guessing problems from sight words or other whole language teaching, I prefer the uppercase version. For students with underlying speech or language problems, the 1908 Webster with diacritical markings is best. For a student with vision problems, I recommend mainly oral spelling and a bit of work in large letters on a white board until vision problems are fixed with vision therapy, transferring the Webster words and syllables to the white board.

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