How would you go about making changes in portion sizes...

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

...without making kids feel deprived or self-conscious or acting (and feeling!) like the food police?

 

My kids are not great self-regulators, and our portion sizes have been out of control for so long that trying to cut back now is causing some major unhappiness. I always frame my actions and discussion in terms of health and never weight, but they're pre-teen girls, so the weight thing is already on their minds (as much as I hate hate hate it!!!).

 

They believe they that they're constantly hungry, particularly my youngest. She's also a food sneaker with sensory issues, so she feels like she needs to constantly be eating :( We eat fairly healthful food, just too much of it. For both budget and health reasons, we ALL need to cut back. But I'm starting to feel like a miserable nag who's starving her children. And I'm starting to get annoyed over it, which is not a great association to be making!

 

Any ideas would be very helpful. Thanks!

[kroe1]

Nothing bigger than a fist is our household rule of thumb. Also, I never allow more than one sweet a day. So far the kids are thin even the 34 year old. Considering the amount of obesity in our relatives, our policing the portions has done very well. Your kiddos will thank you when they are older.

[QueenCat]

I'd probably start slowly, and not do everything at once. I'd also look into what is truly reasonable for each person, based on age/weight/physical activity/etc. We are not all the same, and have different needs. Have healthy snacks that can be consumed whenever so no one feels deprived or like they need to sneak food.

[rwjx2khsmj]

Providing healthy all you care to eat snacks might be a good place to start. Smaller plates is also helpful. Plating their food for them rather than serving family style works here too. If they are still hungry after finishing a reasonable portion they are always welcome to eat more salad or cooked veggies.

[zoobie]

Large salad or bowl of soup (broth-type with veggies) before the meal is served.

 

Would those portion plates help?

 

Daily snack bin for each person with 1 cheese stick or wheel or squares, nuts, portioned nut butter, portioned hummus, portioned grapes (mine will eat a whole bowl at once), etc. And keep chopped veggies for unlimited snacking.

[Annie G]

Start measuring your portions. Kids usually like that because it's 'fair'.    I would be honest that you're trying to monitor both your budget and your health, and that this is a trial to actually see where you stand. For instance, start by declaring that a serving of starch or starchy veg is half a cup. So rice, potatoes, mac and cheese, or starchy veg get half cup servings. 

Other veg or salad can be full cup servings- broccoli, zucchini, green salad, etc. 

 

We started doing this 8 years ago when dh had his heart attack and it's amazing how quickly our grocery bill went down, and we adjusted to the portion sizes. Ds might have two- or sometimes three- servings of something, but we only put one serving of a food on our plate at a time, so he's keenly aware that he's having three servings. Before, it was just a mound of potatoes and he didn't realize how much he was eating. 

 

We also have switched to eating dinner from the lunch size Fiesta plates. They are plenty big enough for portions we eat, and the plate looks full. 

[kiana]

Smaller plates and eating in courses. Soup/salad first, then next course. If you aren't hungry enough to eat soup/salad, you can't be hungry.

 

ETA: The courses also let you frame it as "get in your veggies first for health" rather than "don't eat so many calories"

[Momof3littles]

As someone who tends toward insulin resistance despite not being overweight I can get very hungry very quickly after eating a carbier meal (bagel, cereal, etc. will leave me hungrier an hr later than if I hadn't eaten).  What happens is that carb load causes my blood sugar to rise, and my body likes to pump out too much insulin in response to that load.  That drops my blood sugar too low too fast, leaving me hypoglycemic in the end.  If someone hasn't experienced this, they are fortunate.  I have never had a weight issue, but I can absolutely understand how some overweight folks truly ARE hungry a lot of the time. 

 

If possible, I'd make sure all meals and snacks include a balance of protein and fat with any carbs.  So cheese plus apple slices, or avocado or guacamole with veggies, or nut butter plus a small apple sliced up, cottage cheese with some berries (naturally lower in sugar compared to many fruits), smoothies made with unsweetened almond milk and lower sugar fruits, cottage cheese and tomatoes, hardboiled eggs plus some fruit or veggies, that type of thing.

 

I would start there, as you may find they successfully self-regulate much more effectively without you having to do anything else.

[Mrs Mungo]

 

If possible, I'd make sure all meals and snacks include a balance of protein and fat with any carbs. So cheese plus apple slices, or avocado or guacamole with veggies, or nut butter plus a small apple sliced up, cottage cheese with some berries (naturally lower in sugar compared to many fruits), smoothies made with unsweetened almond milk and lower sugar fruits, cottage cheese and tomatoes, hardboiled eggs plus some fruit or veggies, that type of thing.

 

I agree with this this. My kids are super thin, so we don't do anything like limit portion sizes. However, they definitely need that protein and fat component to feel full for a while.

[73349]

Big glasses for water. Narrow (and preferably also short, but the formula for volume of a cylinder makes diameter more important) glasses for everything else. Small plates for most foods. Ice cream, yogurt, pudding, etc., in a teacup. Hide the tablespoons.

 

At meal time, bring salad (etc.) to the table, but leave meats and especially carbs on the stove. People then have to get up to go get seconds.

 

Meals at regular times and snacks every two hours in between--unlimited fresh veggies, then a pre-packaged portion of something else if you're still hungry (package large bag of pretzels or almonds in tiny jars or snack baggies, for example). BRUSH TEETH after eating to get the taste of food out of their mouths (and prevent cavities).

 

Put unopened packages of breakfast cereal/crackers/whatever somewhere separate and out of sight until ready to package.

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I'd wonder why they feel constantly hungry.

 

How are you determining what their portion size should be?

 

Also, what kinds of foods are they eating?  

 

They're not really hungry. They're just used to snacking when they're bored. They believe that's hunger. 

 

For portion size, I serve what seems to be a reasonable amount--maybe the size of a fist, as someone mentioned. But they always want full-sized seconds and insist they're still hungry. I think I need to start cooking badly! Not to toot my own horn, but I'm a pretty good cook, and I love to cook and bake. But I do notice that when they're served something they don't love, they're much more quickly satisfied with one small portion of it. They don't recognize that, though, and believe their desire for more is hunger. 

 

We eat everything. There's definitely more junk than I like, but for the most part, we eat lots of basic food. Bread seems to be a major downfall. I can't keep it in the house without fighting over its appearance and "necessity" at every meal, and without discovering that my youngest has been secretly snacking on it when I'm not looking. I even buy those skinny multigrain flatbreads that they complain about, and still they want it all the time. If fluffy whole wheat bread makes it into the house, you'd think someone brought over cupcakes :lol: I can't ever buy a treat, like a box of sugary cereal (rare, usually from Whole Foods, so not even really bad!) or cream of wheat without having to argue over it every morning until it's gone. 

[Momof3littles]

I'll toss out there that the bread thing may actually indicate they are dealing with something like insulin resistance.  I speak from experience.  Really.  It truly leaves me so, so hungry.  It isn't about snacking, it is about truly feeling hungry and like I need to shove something in my face asap, even though I just ate.That type of almost addictive drive toward it is fairly common in people who are more in the insulin resistant end of the spectrum.  It is a big continuum, and some people really do produce more insulin in response to a carb load, and that can leave them hungrier in the end.  It can look like "constantly wanting to snack" but really be more than that.

 

 

 

 

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

As someone who tends toward insulin resistance despite not being overweight I can get very hungry very quickly after eating a carbier meal (bagel, cereal, etc. will leave me hungrier an hr later than if I hadn't eaten).  What happens is that carb load causes my blood sugar to rise, and my body likes to pump out too much insulin in response to that load.  That drops my blood sugar too low too fast, leaving me hypoglycemic in the end.  If someone hasn't experienced this, they are fortunate.  I have never had a weight issue, but I can absolutely understand how some overweight folks truly ARE hungry a lot of the time. 

 

If possible, I'd make sure all meals and snacks include a balance of protein and fat with any carbs.  So cheese plus apple slices, or avocado or guacamole with veggies, or nut butter plus a small apple sliced up, cottage cheese with some berries (naturally lower in sugar compared to many fruits), smoothies made with unsweetened almond milk and lower sugar fruits, cottage cheese and tomatoes, hardboiled eggs plus some fruit or veggies, that type of thing.

 

I would start there, as you may find they successfully self-regulate much more effectively without you having to do anything else.

 

That's interesting. I have noticed my youngest go through what seems like a blood-sugar crash when I've told her she can't snack anymore, which seemed impossible given what she'd eaten already. But maybe it is? 

 

They do almost always have some fat and protein with snacks (peanut butter and cheese are very common), but maybe not enough to counteract the carbs? DH and I lean toward a primal diet, so we always have lots of fat/protein snacks in the house, but of course the kids prefer whatever carb is handy, and they complain if I try to push the fat/protein instead of or alongside the carbs. And our dinners are almost always carb-free or very low carb. For example, I'll make burgers and salad for dinner. The girls will eat their burgers with a skinny flat bread instead of a bun, and there's rarely a carb-based side unless I've picked potatoes or beets from the garden. More often it's a green salad or tomato salad or sliced avocado. I guess I need to start paying closer attention to breakfast and lunch...

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I'll toss out there that the bread thing may actually indicate they are dealing with something like insulin resistance.  I speak from experience.  Really.  It truly leaves me so, so hungry.  It isn't about snacking, it is about truly feeling hungry and like I need to shove something in my face asap, even though I just ate.That type of almost addictive drive toward it is fairly common in people who are more in the insulin resistant end of the spectrum.  It is a big continuum, and some people really do produce more insulin in response to a carb load, and that can leave them hungrier in the end.  It can look like "constantly wanting to snack" but really be more than that.

 

We cross-posted, sorry. So how do I handle this? This is my food-sneaking kid, and also the kid whose weight and health I'm most concerned about. Do I just eliminate all grain-based carbs from the house and ensure that she's eating only carbs from fruit/veggies/dairy, etc? Is this something I can reverse at this point or is it something she'll always live with now? 

 

I'm reading all the replies, thank you all so far. 

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I have the same problem. 

 

The biggest thing is breakfast.  I need a high protein breakfast to do well.  Otherwise..crash and burn and like I'm starved.

 

This is how DH and I eat, but we're all burned out on eggs. I need to find some other high-protein options. 

 

And I really want new dishes, because the plates and bowls we have are HUGE. DH didn't want to spend the money, but I think we need to. 

[73349]

With a kid sneaking food, you might also want to read Child of Mine by Ellyn Satter. She recommends thinking carefully about what and when you offer (and dinner is probably the least important meal), and letting kids eat as much or as little as they choose of the foods you're offering. The book explains why. (She's a professional nutritionist and family therapist.)

[Truscifi]

Our easiest change was smaller plates and bowls. We also mostly cut out buying/keeping carbs in the house, and when we do have something as a treat we just let them have it every night until it is gone. Sometimes it is a small dessert item, sometimes a loaf of white bread. We also added green smoothies during the day to get more fruits and veggies in. That may not work for a sensory kid though. Even for me sometimes the texture is a bit much. I have to make sure I blend it very well.

[Katy]

The easiest way to do that in my family is for me to plate the food FOR everyone, and wrap up leftovers and put them away BEFORE anyone sits down to eat.  If I plate the meals, portion sizes are automatically half.  If they plate, they put twice as much on their plates.  Putting away leftovers and giving everyone a serving of dessert (so they don't feel deprived) helps.

 

Also, old-fashioned square meals, a single serving of dessert, and a huge glass of milk or iced tea helps too.

 

If people are getting hungry more often I tend to evaluate whether they haven't had enough exercise recently (insulin issues cause hunger) or whether they're just gearing up for a growth spurt.

[Seasider]

Restaurant style plating of the food with extra salad and veggies set on the table works well here.

[Katy]

9 people posted while I responded...  Coconut oil and exercise help insulin resistance too,  as well as making sure there's more calories from protein and fat than there is from carbs.

[Momof3littles]

Well, if it is something like IR, then it can get worse the more you bombard the body with those insulin spikes.  That's what eventually leads to diabetes from IR, so it isn't a minor thing.  She may not be IR at all, I'm not trying to diagnose her, but offering you a suggestion of something you might want to keep an eye on or talk to your doctor about.  IR is actually fairly common.  I have PCOS, and IR is frequently present to some degree in most women with PCOS.  Some experts think the insulin situation causes the other hormones to be out of whack, since insulin is the "master hormone" for other hormones in the body.  5-10% of women of childbearing age have PCOS, and insulin resistance just in general is more common than that.  Just something to consider talking to the doctor about and keeping an eye on as time goes on.

 

For my own kids, I would try cutting back on the grains a lot to see if things straightened out.  It is more complex with the sensory aspect and the sneaking of food, as forbidding can sometimes backfire.  But not having it as available as a primary snack or accompaniment to most meals might be a start.  If you are already primal-ish that should help. 

 

edited to add that exercise does improve insulin sensitivity, so I'd continue to encourage activity for the whole family, as clearly that's a good thing no matter what.  The concern with IR is that it is closely tied to metabolic syndrome and other health concerns. so it is something to be aware of, if she does have some of those tendencies (and obviously talk to your physician, since that's the only way to get a proper diagnosis).  I have found IR to often be brushed off or not looked at in those who are not overweight already, however, even though it isn't an uncommon condition.

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

Restaurant style plating of the food with extra salad and veggies set on the table works well here.

 

OK, I can't multiquote anymore, it seems, but whitehawk also mentioned this. I do plate the food, but I never thought to leave the main course in the kitchen (unless it's soup or something) and make sure I have the veggies/salad on the table. That's a great idea. And I just decided I'm going to BJ's right now to get those new dishes. They're cheap and much smaller. The bowls alone are probably half the size of the ones we have now. 

[Miss Tick]

Go slow if that helps people adjust.

 

Maybe start by just using the new plates at lunch, or something?

 

Some of the gluten-free crackers are good, perhaps substitute those sometimes at first?

 

It is ok to ruin or of things sometimes. I'm just getting comfortable with that idea.

 

Can you make some of this "not your idea"? Doctor says, or nutritionist says, somebody else to blame?

 

Good luck. Sounds like a rough hill to climb.

[Mommyof4ks]

We bought smaller plates, and we have fruits and veggies out all the time for snacking. I try not to focus so much on portions as what they are eating. Not many people over eat veggies. :) The trick is only eating junk when you go out to eat and not having a bunch of sweets, boxed foods, or bread in the house. :) That is hard, because I love ice cream.

[Mrs Mungo]

Examples of snacks at our house:

 

• energy bites (there are lots of different recipes for these, but most have some sort of nut butter, plus dry milk and other ingredients)
• apples with peanut butter or cheese
• cover a whole wheat tortilla in peanut butter and banana slices (or you can use a whole banana), then slice into pinwheels
• large pepperonis and cheese rolled up together
• hummus, pita, feta, olives, sliced peppers, grape tomatoes
• cottage cheese with fruit
• egg salad on toast
• full fat yogurt
• other kinds of fruit with string cheese or mini babybel or other cheese (my kids love brie)
• broccoli with a cheese dipping sauce
• homemade granola bars

 

[Laura Corin]

We don't limit overall food, but I serve onto plates and make sure that there is a great deal of plain steamed vegetables and things like brown rice or brown pasta.  It's hard to overeat if you are taking in a lot of fibre at the same time.

 

I don't make leftovers of things that I think of as 'good in moderation', so there are no second helpings of those.  

 

L

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

 

Examples of snacks at our house:

 

• energy bites (there are lots of different recipes for these, but most have some sort of nut butter, plus dry milk and other ingredients)
• apples with peanut butter or cheese
• cover a whole wheat tortilla in peanut butter and banana slices (or you can use a whole banana), then slice into pinwheels
• large pepperonis and cheese rolled up together
• hummus, pita, feta, olives, sliced peppers, grape tomatoes
• cottage cheese with fruit
• egg salad on toast
• full fat yogurt
• other kinds of fruit with string cheese or mini babybel or other cheese (my kids love brie)
• broccoli with a cheese dipping sauce
• homemade granola bars

 

 

We do eat a lot of similar things, but we've fallen off the wagon on others. I'm paranoid about peanut butter and nuts because we'll be having a peanut-allergic friend over weekly starting in September, but normally that's a great option for us. I'm not even sure if Sun Butter is safe for her, I'll have to check. DD9 won't eat yogurt or cottage cheese in any form, but DD12 and I like them. I really need a Whole Foods or TJ's to open near here so I don't have to make that long drive every week!

 

Can you share your cheese dipping sauce recipe? That would make veggies go very quickly here, I think. 

 

Thank you!

[Ripley]

My kids eat with their eyes, so moving to smaller plates worked well. 

 

If we were eating soup, they wanted it filled to the brim and always a second helping. Moving to smaller bowls didn't change that, but it did cut their soup meal portion in half. The kids didn't notice or care enough to comment on the smaller portions. They still got their bowls filled to the brim followed by that second helping LOL. It was a victory all around :thumbup: everybody was happy!

 

My priority was to change physical habits first, and worry about the mental habits later. If they asked, I only said "we're aiming for better nutrition" and kept it short and generic. It was hard for me not to engage, but my efforts paid off. I didn't have it in me to fight portion control on multiple fronts. Once everyone adjusted to the new portions and that was no longer a battle, I opened up the floor to discussion/comments. But by this time, many of their standard arguments ("I'm still starving") were no longer valid. They had grown somewhat used to smaller portion sizes, had seen some physical benefit to them and most importantly knew they'd survive. 

 

Another idea might be trickier with certain kids, but worked well for us - we downplayed second helpings.

 

Instead we offerered dessert later if they were still hungry. My kids bought into it because they were entranced by the word DESSERT.  Then I gave them a healthier dessert. For us that was cream and berries, bananas dipped in dark chocolate and rolled in nuts, popcorn with nutritional yeast, juicing from the vitamix poured into popsicle molds, and various fruits counted as desserts once they got a dollop of fresh whipped cream! (Our goal was portion control but also smarter eating. For us that meant more fats in the kids' diet.)

 

Or we offered "second dinner" in a few hours if they were still hungry. Many times this was leftovers, but the kids had to take them from the fridge and warm them up. That was usually a deterrent and accurate judge between true hunger vs. boredom hunger. But sometimes it'd be something small like a serving of guac and chips, a cup of full fat yogurt turned into a faux split (walnuts, sliced bananas, frozen strawberries), or an ounce of cheese with a slice of turkey. 

 

One last thing I did with pre-packaged foods was to show them what was considered a serving size. So when we'd go to Subway and the kids wanted their own bag of chips ... we saw that each bag counted as two servings. So they would share a bag instead. Not always happily at first. But I was happy because eating out got cheaper again LOL.  At home we do the same. So if the loaf of bread calls one slice a serving, we eat half a sandwich or an open-faced sandwich that meal. I didn't get into the nitty gritty of product serving size vs. food chart serving size because it didn't serve my higher purpose LOL. Fortunately the kids never though to ask or challenge it! 
 

[Mrs Mungo]

 

 

Can you share your cheese dipping sauce recipe? That would make veggies go very quickly here, I think. 

 

 

 

My kids like the cheese dip (and pretzel bite) recipe here (my eldest learned to make the pretzels):

http://www.smells-like-home.com/2012/01/soft-pretzel-bites-with-cheese-sauce/

[mommymilkies]

I feel your pain!  I portion out my kids' food at dinner already.  They can share the leftovers and have learned to divide up leftovers so it's fair.  I try to fill the plate with vegetables and meat and starches are a side for most meals.  I am hypoglycemic and bread actually fills me up IF it is homemade and I slather it in butter.  Adding protein and fat to your carbs really will help so much.  I would work on the snack suggestions above-portioned out, if needed like in a tackle or bead box.  Then teaching them how to portion food out.  Also-the water idea, definitely!  A glass of water, soup or salad or crudites right before dinner will fill them up on veggies and water to help their digestion. 

[SadieMarie]

I tell them it takes time for their brain to get the message from their stomach that they are full. So if dd is going for more than I think is healthy I will just say that she can have more if she is still hungry in twenty minutes.  That way I am not saying she can't have it, just that she needs to wait.  Often she forgets all about it.

[Reefgazer]

If you are a family of 4, only cook 4 normal sized portions.  When those are gone, just tell everyone who wants seconds that there is no more left.  Make sure you always have an excess of fruits/veggies, though, so they *have* to choose those if they are truly hungry.

[gardenmom5]

...without making kids feel deprived or self-conscious or acting (and feeling!) like the food police?

 

My kids are not great self-regulators, and our portion sizes have been out of control for so long that trying to cut back now is causing some major unhappiness. I always frame my actions and discussion in terms of health and never weight, but they're pre-teen girls, so the weight thing is already on their minds (as much as I hate hate hate it!!!).

 

They believe they that they're constantly hungry, particularly my youngest. She's also a food sneaker with sensory issues, so she feels like she needs to constantly be eating :( We eat fairly healthful food, just too much of it. For both budget and health reasons, we ALL need to cut back. But I'm starting to feel like a miserable nag who's starving her children. And I'm starting to get annoyed over it, which is not a great association to be making!

 

Any ideas would be very helpful. Thanks!

 

what makes you think they're NOT hungry?  increase the amount of fiber and protein in the diet as they are filling.

 

popcorn makes a great and cheap snack.  (don't buy microwave popcorn - that's expensive, and burns . . . . )

[rebbyribs]

.They believe they that they're constantly hungry, particularly my youngest. She's also a food sneaker with sensory issues, so she feels like she needs to constantly be eating :( We eat fairly healthful food, just too much of it. For both budget and health reasons, we ALL need to cut back. But I'm starting to feel like a miserable nag who's starving her children. And I'm starting to get annoyed over it, which is not a great association to be making!

 

If it's a sensory thing, gum between meals might be helpful.  The xylitol stuff is supposed to be good for your teeth.  

[Um_2_4]

For snacks, I get those snack size ziploc bags and portion out and put in a "snack box" (medium size sterlite box). Everyone can choose 1 thing from there and a cheese stick or cheese cubes (also bagged in fridge drawerr) and grapes (also bagged) or cherry tomatoes (also bagged) or other fruit (usually apple, peaches, bananas or melon balls). I also get portion cups from a restaurant supply store (really cheap like 100 for $3) and make up cups with yogurt dip or PB for dipping.

Yes it costs a few pennies for the baggies/cups, but I figure I am saving in less wasted food and better serving sizes. Plus I use them in packing DH's lunch and the savings alone there versus his buying snacks from the vending machine is $$$$.  Like for a while I used to get prepackaged nuts off Amazon, but found I can get bulk nuts from Winco and package into the smaller snack size bags for less.

 

Also I used to do this for snacks at home, I had for each kid a set of measuring cups (I mainly use the 1/4c, 1/2c and 1 c) and say you can have 1 scoop (I pick the size) of cereal for a snack or of nuts or of pretzels, etc.  Maybe I should go back to that, but I like my other system as it saves time during the day.

[Aelwydd]

They believe they that they're constantly hungry, particularly my youngest.

I feel like that sometimes. I suspect it's actually the body's way of saying it's nutritionally starving. And that's not a hit on your food selection, BTW. It's more an indictment of how a lot of supposedly healthy foods like veggies come to market with a nutritional deficit, due to conventional farming, genetic alteration, prolific use of pesticides, exposure to heat while in transit, processing, etc.

 

That isn't to say that veggies and such have no nutritional value, but it does make sense that the body keeps demanding greater amounts to satisfy its needs.

 

Processed foods are much worse! So if you're going to allow second or third servings, I definitely agree it should be from a raw or unprocessed food.

[gardenmom5]

:iagree:  also, the body will interpret thirst as hunger.  make sure they're drinking enough water.  not sugary drinks (even fruit juice is loaded with sugar.)

I feel like that sometimes. I suspect it's actually the body's way of saying it's nutritionally starving. And that's not a hit on your food selection, BTW. It's more an indictment of how a lot of supposedly healthy foods like veggies come to market with a nutritional deficit, due to conventional farming, genetic alteration, prolific use of pesticides, exposure to heat while in transit, processing, etc.

That isn't to say that veggies and such have no nutritional value, but it does make sense that the body keeps demanding greater amounts to satisfy its needs.

Processed foods are much worse! So if you're going to allow second or third servings, I definitely agree it should be from a raw or unprocessed food.

 

[gardenmom5]

this evening, I was thinking about the fact I would eat instead of sleeping when I was tired.  so, make sure they get enough sleep too.

:iagree:  also, the body will interpret thirst as hunger.  make sure they're drinking enough water.  not sugary drinks (even fruit juice is loaded with sugar.)

 

[Arcadia]

She's also a food sneaker with sensory issues, so she feels like she needs to constantly be eating :(

 

Would chewing gum be okay or would that be a slippery slope? Crunching carrots help too. My kids just crunch an uncut carrot each if they just need to munch while doing their work.

[December]

The idea of cutting back on children's food portions due to budget issues just makes me feel sad.  My husband went to bed hungry every single night because portion sizes were limited in his family due to poverty.  His parents didn't know either, because if he or his siblings acted like they were still hungry after eating dinner their mom would start freaking out and then they'd feel guilty for making her feel bad, so they'd pretend to be fine and then lay in bed for hours with their stomachs grumbling. It's made him kind of hyper vigilant about making sure our kids always have had enough to eat before going to bed.  So if it were me, based on seeing how painful of an experience that was for my husband, I would try to find some other option besides restricting how much a child can eat at dinner. Maybe more rice and beans and other cheap staples or even looking into getting some kind of food assistance? As long as it's healthy foods, I'd much rather err on the side of my child eating a little more than absolutely necessary than risk them feeling hungry.

[kiwik]

The problem with feeling hungry is that it can be depression, boredom, tiredness, thirst etc or it can just be hunger. With the one you are concerned about - do they have allergies? I eat when I have hayfever because I am trying to settle my stomach and plain bread is the best thing.

[LibraryLover]

More good fat and good protein, less cereal , crackers & bread. Peanut butter on small apple slices, cheese, hard boiled (or any eggs) eggs, chunks of tuna on a salad etc are going to keep kids fuller longer. Some kids may need two eggs. Two eggs will make you full, but two pieces of toast makes many people hungry. Avocados, tuna on salads on in wraps, olives etc can satisfy because of fat content. Growing children don't have to be worried about good fat, but I would be worried about high carb snacks. They seem to be appetite revers. ;) as an experiment, I'd also get rid of chips except maybe blue corn tortilla chips for guacamole), crackers, all juice, and low fat yogurt with sugar. (Cheese sticks are cheaper and more filling.) . Water all the way, unless your children do well with full fat or two percent milk. I'd also schedule in two protein/ fat snacks-- probably mid morning, and mid afternoon.

 

I agree with the boredom thing. Wandering around leads to poking in the fridge. Engaged activity is critical.

[Tanaqui]

1. As everybody else has said, get smaller plates. Your brain uses visual cues to help determine fullness. That's why if you trick people into eating a bowl of soup that constantly refills, many of them will just keep eating. Likewise, whether you have a large bag of popcorn or a small one, most people leave about 1/3 of the bag behind when watching a movie.

 

2. Location rules. If you're eating a meal, eat it in the kitchen or dining room ONLY, and have the food for seconds on the counter (if you're in the kitchen) or in the kitchen (if you're in the dining room) so that anybody who wants seconds has to actually get up and refill their plates.

 

If anybody in the family wants a snack, the rule has to be that they eat it in the kitchen, sitting at the table, and if it's not a piece of fruit it should be served on a plate or in a bowl - no munching directly from a bag of chips in front of the TV. That little bit of extra effort is enough for most people to only eat if they really are hungry. If you're out and about, the rule should be that you don't eat while walking around. You find a place to sit down first. Again, that bit of effort will stop most people from boredom eating.

 

3. Don't buy anything you don't want them eating. People are less likely to mindlessly munch on carrots and hummus than they are on ice cream and cookies. If they ARE eating the carrots and hummus, they probably are really hungry - after all, they're entering puberty. You have to expect them to actually be pretty hungry a lot of the time while they're growing. But you'll feel better about it if they're filling up on fruits and vegetables than if they're filling up on junk.

[TammyS]

They're not really hungry. They're just used to snacking when they're bored. They believe that's hunger. 

 

 

Schedule ALL eating, including snacks.  If they are hungry just tell them that they can eat at whatever the next meal time is going to be.  The can be hungry.  It is not harmful.  Once you institute this and stick to it, the bored snacking will go away for the most part. 

 

I completely disagree with those who say "all free amounts of healthy snacks".  It might reduce the caloric problem, but it doesn't solve the root problem, which is using food for entertainment. 

 

Here, we have breakfast at 6:30, snack 1 at 9:30-10 (basically they get a snack while I exercise, so it depends on when I get started), lunch at 12:00, snack 2 at 4:00 and dinner around 7p.  Then we're done.

 

Yes, sometimes they are hungry.  They still have to wait.  A little bit of feeling hungry never killed anybody.  It teaches them self control and mental/emotional strength.  It teaches them they can be uncomfortable for a period of time without it damaging them, which translates into less whining about the various discomforts of life (too hot, too cold, too tired, work is too hard, whatever).  I firmly believe that one of the jobs of parents is to teach our children that discomfort is not the end of the world and we can work through it without whining and inflicting misery on those around us.

 

[EmilyGF]

There's a whole book on this topic, Mindless Eating by Wansink.

 

One of the most powerful parts of the book was the story of when he gave a talk about how using bigger plates translates to people eating more. Afterwards, there was a reception that was set up with two stations for ice cream. One side had bigger bowls, the other had smaller bowls. When they were done serving themselves ice cream, they went into the "reception" room, where their ice cream was weighed. Guess what - the people with bigger bowls had taken about 30% more ice cream, despite having just gone to a lecture on how people are influenced by the size of their plate. The point was that even when you know the tricks, you still get tricked.

 

Some of his suggestions have been covered (keep healthy food in sight or on the table, unhealthy food out of sight and not on the table, use smaller plates). Still it is a good read. We listened to it aloud on a family road trip, which helped hubby get the picture. There is no way he would have read it alone!

[QueenCat]

 

 

I completely disagree with those who say "all free amounts of healthy snacks".  It might reduce the caloric problem, but it doesn't solve the root problem, which is using food for entertainment. 

 

Here, we have breakfast at 6:30, snack 1 at 9:30-10 (basically they get a snack while I exercise, so it depends on when I get started), lunch at 12:00, snack 2 at 4:00 and dinner around 7p.  Then we're done.

 

Yes, sometimes they are hungry.  They still have to wait.  A little bit of feeling hungry never killed anybody.  It teaches them self control and mental/emotional strength.  It teaches them they can be uncomfortable for a period of time without it damaging them, which translates into less whining about the various discomforts of life (too hot, too cold, too tired, work is too hard, whatever).  I firmly believe that one of the jobs of parents is to teach our children that discomfort is not the end of the world and we can work through it without whining and inflicting misery on those around us.

 

 

Since I snack when I'm hungry, rather than on schedule, I allow the same for my children once they are old enough to get it on their own. Yes, sometimes one must wait due to circumstance (i.e. not home). No, it doesn't kill them to occasionally wait but why wait when it isn't necessary (other than due to some arbitrary rule)? And if one isn't hungry at the scheduled snack time, are yours required to eat or forfeit until the next scheduled time? We are individuals in our family, and do not all have the same needs. We do eat dinner together, and by a certain age, kids are pretty good at regulating themselves so they'll be ready to eat then. And if they aren't hungry, they sit & visit, and perhaps eat later (not a common occurrence, but I am the one most likely to do it, not one of the kids). I strive to set an example for healthy eating patterns, which I can see that I've done.

 

[MistiDelaney]

You might try Dollar Tree...or a resale shop.  I got my favorite small plates at Value Village. Twenty five cents each.

 

;)

And I really want new dishes, because the plates and bowls we have are HUGE. DH didn't want to spend the money, but I think we need to. 

 

[MistiDelaney]

One more idea that I haven't heard mentioned.  Are those snacks that can't be resisted mainly wheat based? The way you describe your children sounds an awful lot like my husband before he was diagnosed with celiac.  He was always hungry and he was obsessed with bread.  I kid you not, he once went out at 2am when we came home late and he remembered that we were out of bread - even though it was the only thing we were out of. 

 

If none of the other excellent ideas work, you might have a look at what it is that they "need".  If it always seems to be the same ingredient, you might consider whether they have a food sensitivity.

[Momof3littles]

OP, you could also see if they will tolerate almond or coconut flour based recipes.  There are some pretty amazing ones out there.  They are generally high fiber and more filling.  Some straight coconut flour recipes take a LOT of eggs due to how much liquid coconut flour soaks up, so then there's the added protein from the eggs.  I might see if those are tolerated by the sensory kid (maybe not).  Elana's pantry and and alldayIdreamaboutfood have recipes that turn out nicely for us.

[LibraryLover]

This thread is a bit worrisome to me. Before I reduced portion sizes, I'd make sure they were enough nutrients in the form of proteins and good fats in the food I was serving. Are the kids in a growth spurt? It's possible they really are hungry. A fist size of what kinds of foods? Refined carbs make some people hungrier. Children eating eggo waffles over eggs, or Kix cereal with skim milk are not going to feel full for long. That's not enough nutrients to satisfy or prevent blood sugar issues. Start days off with a plate of scrambled eggs. (No juice). Have snacks of cheese and nuts. Have them keep their water bottles full and encourage them to stay hydrated. Take a walk after a lunch of chicken salad (but no refined carbs), hummus and carrots.etc Change the food and see if it makes a difference.

I live near a Whole Foods and. TJ's and I don't think their basics are better than a good general market like Publix etc TJs has so many refined and packaged snacks. WF is better, but more costly.

 

Basics:

Eggs

Nut butters

Cheeses

Avocados

Full fat yogurt

Full fat cottage cheese

Seeds

Nuts

Beans

Tuna

Fish

Chicken

Beef

Hummus

Olive oil

Coconut oil

Sesame oil