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Need Hive backup: unexpected surgery & breastfeeding


AndyJoy
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So after months of back pain, an x-ray showing minor disc damage, and unsuccessful PT, I went to a spine specialist yesterday and today. An MRI showed I have a large "most likely benign" tumor compressing my spinal cord to the point that the Dr. is shocked I can walk and haven't had urinary issues. Up until now everyone has assumed the pain was just caused by the repetitve baby care.

 

So I'm obviously freaking out a bit because my next step is to see a neurosurgeon ASAP to have surgery. I don't have details yet, so I don't k ow exactly what this will mean in terms of medication, time, expected recovery timetable, etc.

 

Part of my concerns are what this will mean for breastfeeding DD. She just turned 1, and I had no plans to wean her until close to age 2 like DS. That was pretty easy given his age. But she is very attached to nursing and still wakes at least once in the night and is inconsolable 95% of the time unless I nurse her. She nurses to sleep at both nap time and bedtime, and nurses 2-3 other times.

 

So I'm hoping for help, advice, support, BTDT, whatever, in addition to prayer for me! I have a good pump and have been able to pump well previously, but we've never done it consistently, just more of a "gee whiz it might be nice to have this option" thing. I'm apprehensive of how DD is going to handle the change if I can't nurse, and I'm really sad at the possibility that I may need to wean. Fortunately she's way more accepting/clingy to Daddy than DS was at this age, so that should help.

 

Please help me out here with some ideas/encouragement!

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I had surgery (ovary removed) when dd was 10 months old and exclusively breastfeeding.  I made sure every med I got was as breastfeeding-compatible as possible, and I pumped and dumped once right after the procedure and that was it.  Can you call the lactation consultant at the hospital where you delivered for advice?  Also, I think I got lots of info from Dr. Hale's site  http://www.infantrisk.com/  Good luck!  This type of thing is always scary!  (I'm going in for a breast ultrasound of a suspicious lump on Mon and now I'm nursing a 5 month old.  Hoping to not have to go through this again!)

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:grouphug:

 

With youngest dd, I had to stop breast feeding early than planned due some unpleasant medical stuff.  We were able to keep the nap time cuddles and bedtime snuggly times - just without the nursing.    Best wishes for you and your little one!

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You may want to consider pumping and freezing to prepare for immediately after surgery.  Than see how long you need pain meds and how long you have to be on the meds. Your dr can tell you how long the meds will stay in your system after you quit taking them.  That way you can use your frozen milk during that period. You will have to pump and dump while on pain meds after surgery to keep your milk supply up. The other consideration is this surgery going to be painful enough that you won't be able to pump or nurse. It can be done. Hugs.

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I'm sorry for your unexpected news. I hope the surgery and recovery goes well. :grouphug:

 

If they give you typical narcotics like Percoset, etc., those are safe for nursing. I've gotten them with every c-section. Ask what they will give. Look up the drugs in Dr. Hale's book. Most probably online now, or your ped should have it or access to it. If ped is unhelpful, an IBLC (I think I'm missing a letter there...) will be able to tell you. The back surgeon will be clueless and will tell you to not nurse as a CYA.

 

I was nursing DD2 before my last c-section. She didn't nurse while I was in the hospital for 3 days, and I didn't pump. The newborn nursed, but you know how much they eat, so negligible amounts. I went right back to nursing her when I got home. She did fine without me there. If I had been home, no one would've gotten her to sleep without a fuss. The hospital time might break her of the middle of the night nursing without quashing nursing altogether. That would be stressful while recouperating!

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C-sections are pretty invasive surgery and the pain meds used for that are entirely breast feeding compatible. I would be very up front with the surgeon and your care team about that. That said, I might practice some days with a sitter if I had a chance. I found when my kids were that age, they would be fine without breastfeeding if I wasn't there. And then the would resume when I got back immediately.

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I think you'll be able to find a pain med(Percocet, as others have mentioned) that will be safe.  When I had some unexpected medical issues come up while I was nursing, I just asked at the hospital for a breast pump, and they were always able to get one from maternity for me to use.  BTW, my ds was always able to resume nursing just fine once I was back home.  I hope everything goes smoothly for your surgery((hugs)). 

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Yep, ask for Percocet. I had to have my gallbladder removed when my youngest was 3 months old. I was freaking out! She was so little, had never had a bottle, and no formula. I researched a ton. I asked for a list of all meds they would use during the surgery and looked them up in Dr Hales book. Turns out, everything was A-okay. I nursed her in the prep room immediately before surgery. I gave my mom a bottle of thawed breast milk to give her, just in case. And I had planned to feed her immediately upon waking. Thankfully I only needed Motrin once for recovery but I had Percocet if needed. You shouldn't have to wean and don't let the doctors tell you otherwise. My experience is that most doctors are ignorant when it comes to breast feeding. I've had SO many doctors look at me like I'm a weirdo for nursing past a year old and spout off very wrong information. My nursling is now 2.5 and still nursing....usually only when she's tired though.

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I think it's probably possible to find drugs that are compatible with breastfeeding. You might talk to your child's doctor and have him/her send a list of preferred drugs to the surgeon ahead of time. I'm sorry you've been handed this shock!

 

Also, if you do need to wean earlier than planned, there are still other ways to be close to your baby, and it will be okay. I felt pretty guilty that I had to give up wearing, cosleeping, and nursing for more than a couple of minutes with my fourth baby because I was pregnant again when he was only 16 months old (my other gaps are larger, and my other babies were babies for longer), but it was harder on me than on him. We just found other ways to be close.

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I'm a little concerned for you having back surgery, then holding a one year old to nurse and hurting yourself. One year olds move and pull on you more and back surgery takes awhile to heal, and you are not supposed to lift during that time. Please see what the surgeon says and what your options are so you can have a good outcome.

 

My other thoughts are that if you are unable to nurse for several days, your family will be taking care of your baby and the baby will get used to not nursing (and wean), and being older, may not be interested in resuming. That happened to me.  YMMV

 

Best wishes for a successful surgery.

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I'm a little concerned for you having back surgery, then holding a one year old to nurse and hurting yourself. One year olds move and pull on you more and back surgery takes awhile to heal, and you are not supposed to lift during that time. Please see what the surgeon says and what your options are so you can have a good outcome.

 

My other thoughts are that if you are unable to nurse for several days, your family will be taking care of your baby and the baby will get used to not nursing (and wean), and being older, may not be interested in resuming. That happened to me. YMMV

 

Best wishes for a successful surgery.

Yes, the physical ability to nurse in a safe position post-op has been on my mind. For the last couple months I've nursed while lying down with her, except for the occasional quick nip in public where she basically sits up on my lap. I don't know yet what positions will be safe/comfortable. DH has been doing all the baby lifting whenever he's home before we knew about the tumor just to help me rest my back. Hopefully my mom will be coming to help.

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Thank you all for the help and encouragement. I'm trying not to stress/obsess especially since I don't have details yet. I think it's easier for me to think about the nursing issue than to grapple with my fear about the surgery :( I tried pumping after DD went to bed but wasn't successful so I'll try again tomorrow.

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I had ACL surgery when my daughter was around 1 year old. I weaned right before the surgery, but it was so close to the surgery that the hormone crash ran right into the surgery, I don't recommend that timing! I had hormone crash and after surgery issues compounding each other.

 

Either wean at least few days before if you won't be above to nurse safely after the surgery or wait until later. I have no idea what I was thinking. Well, actually I wasn't thinking...

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You won't need to pump and dump. Go to kellymom.com and LLL and find an lc that can give you good info. Most physicians know surprisingly little about breast feeding and even less about meds and breast feeding. Your little one is not at risk for respiratory depression at her age unless she has some major medical issues. I wouldn't even bring up nursing at all.

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I think you would be wise to check out both the websites mentioned AND any local LLL person who has experience in this area. BUT I think you should also remember that you are not having minor surgery. Find out from the surgeon how long you are expected to be hospitalized. I would estimate 4 days, but more is certainly not outside the realm of possibility, I am guessing. Your plans re: your daughter depend on this. Also, it's likely you will have a period of significant disability afterward during which lifting, moving much, and generally caring for small children, will not be possible. The surgeon will almost certainly tell you to wean your daughter first-it will make his or her life less complicated...and yours as well. Please keep in mind that you are setting priorities for your own health, future health, and ease of mind, and decide accordingly. If your daughter must be unexpectedly weaned now, SHE WILL BE FINE. And I say this as someone who nursed her kids until they were preschoolers, so believe me, I am very sympathetic to your situation. ((hugs)) to you-I will be thinking of you!

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C-sections are pretty invasive surgery and the pain meds used for that are entirely breast feeding compatible. I would be very up front with the surgeon and your care team about that. That said, I might practice some days with a sitter if I had a chance. I found when my kids were that age, they would be fine without breastfeeding if I wasn't there. And then the would resume when I got back immediately.

 

Yup. The infantrisk center linked above is who you should contact about the medications. Bring the phone number with you to your appt to have the doctor talk to them, and decide what works. He can tell them what he would use and they can suggest alternatives if need be. Also bring the number ot the hospital for the anesthesiologist. 

 

And I bet your kid does great if you aren't there. Mine would always fall asleep for dad without nursing, on the rare times I wasn't around, but never for me. 

 

I'd maybe look up some alternate positions to nurse in, or ask the doctor what positions you will be able to sit in or lie in or whatever. Maybe side lying nursing? 

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Yeah, the pain meds are not a big deal. I've taken percocet, darvocet, Tylenol with codeine, and vicodin/lortab  and all were fine breastfeeding if the baby wasn't at tiny infant. (not all at once, lol! That's over three kids, and almost 10 years of nursing and counting)

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I had surgery five days from when DD turned one.  She was still breastfeeding….and breast milk made up probably 90% of her calories.  I was in the hospital for two days.

 

 

What I did was pump before so that there was some BM at home for her.

 

Pump and dump right after surgery.

 

Then, DH brought her to the hospital twice each day to nurse. My breasts were a little sore, but she was fine. :)   She did eat more normal food then.  Once I was back out, she went back to nursing normally….and didn't wean until she was two.   

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My oldest was 16 months when I went into preterm labor with his little sis. He had to stop nursing *immediately*.

Interestingly, he never really quit asking. So when little sis was born, 2 months later, he just picked right back up. They tandem nursed for more than two years.

 

You guys should be fine :)

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First of all, you won't have to wean. Don't worry about that.

 

My friend went through what sounds like a very similar situation. The cyst started in pregnancy and she had to wait to have the surgery shortly after the baby was born. I believe in second opinions, but this was one case in which the surgery was very necessary. My friend did have some nerve damage that was clearly there before the surgery--that's why earlier is better. My friend researched and found the best surgeon. 

 

I think she was concerned about breastfeeding and researched a lot about the safety of the meds. I think she may have pumped and dumped milk but only for a VERY short time, maybe the day and day after the surgery. I don't remember her complaining of pain after the surgery so she may not have had to take meds for long in any case.

 
Her hospital stay was short--maybe a day, or two at the very most--which was a lot different than my dd's spine surgery. I was so surprised when I saw her because she was walking around and seemed very functional just a few days after.

 

She got a lot of help with the baby and the kids. I think her mom may have come for the baby and friends took turn with the other kids for the first couple of weeks.

 

From our family's experience with spine surgery, I think I can safely say the initial pain of the surgery only lasted a few days. My dd had to be careful for six months but that was because her bones had to heal. If you're not dealing with bone healing, the full recovery will be relatively short. My daughter had pain after surgery that lasted weeks, but that was due to her nerves being irritated for months before and she had the position of her spine corrected during the surgery and her nerves were shifted around. It took awhile for them to settle down, but then they were fine and she's pain free. I'm rather confident that you won't be dealing with that, though.

 

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I was also going to say, my MIL had spine surgery in her 70's and her recovery wasn't that awful either.  She was only in the hospital one night and looked surprisingly good just a couple days later and was getting around the house.  It was a while (6 weeks?) until she was totally back to her baseline, but the recovery was certainly better than I expected for a woman in her 70's!  :grouphug:

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The main concern is not the drugs-- it will be AndyJoy's ability to move and lift afterwards.

 

I had back surgery a few years ago-- ruptured disk (L4-L5) and a bone spur that poked into my spinal cord was removed.  They were able to go in through my tummy.  The first week was miserable (painful and I have a HIGH pain tolerance) I was not allowed to eat solid food for the first 3 days-- (so getting your required calories may be an issue too). 

 

I was home the next day (24 hours total in hospital).  I could not lift more than 10 pounds for the first few weeks-- and I could not bend either (Dr's orders plus it was too painful)

 

It would be very difficult to nurse a toddler under those circumstances (even rolling to side while in bed was risky and painful). 

 

Talk to surgeon about procedures (going in through back verses front) and expected recovery limitations-- do ths BEFORE the pre-op appointment if possible so you and your family support can be prepared.  Most likely the Dr will just give you his best guess-- and not will really know until after the surgery.

 

 

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I think you would be wise to check out both the websites mentioned AND any local LLL person who has experience in this area. BUT I think you should also remember that you are not having minor surgery. Find out from the surgeon how long you are expected to be hospitalized. I would estimate 4 days, but more is certainly not outside the realm of possibility, I am guessing. Your plans re: your daughter depend on this. Also, it's likely you will have a period of significant disability afterward during which lifting, moving much, and generally caring for small children, will not be possible. The surgeon will almost certainly tell you to wean your daughter first-it will make his or her life less complicated...and yours as well. Please keep in mind that you are setting priorities for your own health, future health, and ease of mind, and decide accordingly. If your daughter must be unexpectedly weaned now, SHE WILL BE FINE. And I say this as someone who nursed her kids until they were preschoolers, so believe me, I am very sympathetic to your situation. ((hugs)) to you-I will be thinking of you!

Thanks for this. I know intellectually she'll be fine, but the thought of nilursing being interuppted or cut short hurts emotionally, you know? I enjoy it, even as annoying and painful as it can be.

 

I'm working hard at prioritizing myself, as I know that's really what everyone needs here anyway. I'm so glad she's 1; it does make this less frustrating for me.

 

I may not really be able to wean her very gradually. It sounds like we may be talking surgery right away.

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The main concern is not the drugs-- it will be AndyJoy's ability to move and lift afterwards.

 

I had back surgery a few years ago-- ruptured disk (L4-L5) and a bone spur that poked into my spinal cord was removed. They were able to go in through my tummy. The first week was miserable (painful and I have a HIGH pain tolerance) I was not allowed to eat solid food for the first 3 days-- (so getting your required calories may be an issue too).

 

I was home the next day (24 hours total in hospital). I could not lift more than 10 pounds for the first few weeks-- and I could not bend either (Dr's orders plus it was too painful)

 

It would be very difficult to nurse a toddler under those circumstances (even rolling to side while in bed was risky and painful).

 

Talk to surgeon about procedures (going in through back verses front) and expected recovery limitations-- do ths BEFORE the pre-op appointment if possible so you and your family support can be prepared. Most likely the Dr will just give you his best guess-- and not will really know until after the surgery.

Yes, that's my concern too more so than the drugs. Nursing is already painful now due to my back. I really have no idea what I will be able to tolerate post surgery at this point. It looks like my mom will come and dh has lots of leave and has a new position that will allow him to work from home! So this is good, at least. I have a friend watching my son while I go to my appointment; DH and DD will come with me. Unfortunately we're 3 hours from Los Angeles, so that makes logistics harder.

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I was 1000% pain free after my back surgery (L3 and L 4).

 

The only problem was I could not lift my arms for 2-3 weeks afterward. It's apparently a side effect of the surgery but not everyone experiences it (my mother did not after hers).

 

While my surgery was unplanned, it was the best thing I could have done. After 30 years of chronic back pain I have been 99.9% pain free.

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