Early onset puberty

[mamabear2three]

I was at the pediatrician today with my 6 year old, and found out that puberty can start as young as 7 these days and still be considered "normal" in the medical field. My daughter is already getting her 12 year molars and her ped. thinks she may start going through puberty as young as 9...  

 

She also highly recommended talking to my daughter about puberty within the next year if not sooner, so that if her friends go through it earlier than her, it has already been covered at home. She also said if we start the conversation now, it makes it that much easier to keep talking about it as she gets older, which does make sense.

 

She's already learned some when I had our baby boy just over a year ago. (she wanted to know how we would know if it was a boy or girl, so we got some basic parts down) But I my head is spinning because I figured I didn't need to even think about this until she was 10 or 11. 

 

Thoughts? Suggestions on books that are age appropriate but cover everything? The book I went over with her before just talked about basic body parts.

[Terabith]

Well, my almost 9 yr old who is having some development was dx today with central precocious puberty.  They're doing further testing but may treat it bc there are some serious effects (socially, psychologically, and also with regards to adult height).  So I would consider asking for a referral to a pediatric endocrinologist or at least a bone xray/ hormonal blood test. 

 

As far as books, I really like It's Not the Stork and It's So Amazing.  The American Girls Body book is also very good, but it's pitched more towards the 10 yr old crowd. 

[Chrysalis Academy]

My oldest walked at 10 months, lost her first tooth at 4, started showing signs of puberty at 9, and just got her period at 11.5.  She's also 5'5".  She's just an early bloomer, but is perfectly normal.  I think we talked about the facts of life when she was about 7, and then she got really interested in puberty and physical changes at about 9.  I was always there if she had questions, but she really, really liked having books she could read on her own, and then ask me questions after she had processed on her own.  I'll come back in a bit and post some of the books that she liked the most.

[deerforest]

We've been talking about this since at least age 4 or so, starting with It's Not the Stork, It's So Amazing, and more recently It's Perfectly Normal. DD also liked the American Girl books and some others I can't recall. She's 9.5 and still not really showing any signs, but we talk about it a lot. I let her direct the questions, and it doesn't feel like this mysterious "thing". It's just normal life.

[mamabear2three]

my daughter has been early at everything - she walked at 8 months, had her first tooth at 3 months, lost her first tooth before all her friends etc. 

 

I do think that I will do research on all this and see if I would feel more comfortable with some tests run. 

[Chrysalis Academy]

Ok, I asked Shannon and she recommends two books: one is Growing Up: It's a Girl Thing by Mavis Jukes (not It's a Girl Thing, by the same author - which is for older girls, so check and make sure you get the right one, she says).  The other one she recommended for younger girls is The Care and Keeping of You: The Body Book for Girls  by Valorie Lee Schaefer, published by American Girl.

[mamabear2three]

Thanks for the suggestions!

[laughing lioness]

Our youngest dd showed signs of precocious puberty as young as 9- very different from her 2 older sisters. My niece started her period at 9- so it's in the family. Basically, we radically shifted our diet due to some health issues with dh but no diary, little/no meat other than organic and very little gluten. Her development has radically slowed. 

There is also a book called, "Period"- not sure the author- very straightforward. 

[freesia]

My oldest walked at 10 months, lost her first tooth at 4, started showing signs of puberty at 9, and just got her period at 11.5.  She's also 5'5".  She's just an early bloomer, but is perfectly normal.  I think we talked about the facts of life when she was about 7, and then she got really interested in puberty and physical changes at about 9.  I was always there if she had questions, but she really, really liked having books she could read on her own, and then ask me questions after she had processed on her own.  I'll come back in a bit and post some of the books that she liked the most.

Hey, is my dd your dd's lost twin? This (with a month here or there and a half an inch variation) is my dd, too.

 

Yes, talk to her. I'll try to find the book dd used. She also loved reading books on her own. I think it's best to be matter a fact and straight forward.

[Ameena]

Following this. DD is 7.5, and showing signs {chiefly the beginnings of body shape changes}.

 

I haven't broached the subject yet on account of her ASD.

[justamouse]

I'm going to give you a way the heck out there story about this. 

One of my daughters was at the dentist, getting her x-rays. She had her wisdom teeth coming up VERY early. 

He asked me if I let them drink milk with bovine growth hormone in it. Apparently, I did. He said that was the reason she was maturing so quickly. And she did. 

We stopped. My other girls? are heading into their teens with no wisdom teeth, and just getting breast buds. If it were one girl, I would think that it was just her particular set of genes. But it's the same with ALL of my younger girls who have never had milk with hormones. They are little sticks with no other puberty signs.

[freesia]

I'm going to give you a way the heck out there story about this. 

 

One of my daughters was at the dentist, getting her x-rays. She had her wisdom teeth coming up VERY early. 

 

He asked me if I let them drink milk with bovine growth hormone in it. Apparently, I did. He said that was the reason she was maturing so quickly. And she did. 

 

We stopped. My other girls? are heading into their teens with no wisdom teeth, and just getting breast buds. If it were one girl, I would think that it was just her particular set of genes. But it's the same with ALL of my younger girls who have never had milk with hormones. They are little sticks with no other puberty signs.

My dd only had organic milk and she got the buds at 9. For her, I think it was genes (bc I developed early--I thought it was the Soy Formula I had been on as a baby. DD was breast fed until 2 and only had organic milk. I was very surprised when she developed early bc it blew my theories out of the water.)

[Ameena]

This is on a related note, but what do y'all do with a child with early puberty & religious expectations that come with puberty? Continue to treat them as a child? Adult? Wing it?

 

I'm Muslim, and puberty starts the "adult" life in my faith. As a girl, dd would have certain expectations of her as a adult muslim woman, including fasting, wearing hijab, etc. The issue is I can easily see dd starting her cycle by age 9 or so {I was like 10.5 I think}, given the signs her body is putting forth now. But I don't see her being anywhere near ready to be an adult religiously at that age.

[mamabear2three]

I'm going to give you a way the heck out there story about this. 

 

One of my daughters was at the dentist, getting her x-rays. She had her wisdom teeth coming up VERY early. 

 

He asked me if I let them drink milk with bovine growth hormone in it. Apparently, I did. He said that was the reason she was maturing so quickly. And she did. 

 

We stopped. My other girls? are heading into their teens with no wisdom teeth, and just getting breast buds. If it were one girl, I would think that it was just her particular set of genes. But it's the same with ALL of my younger girls who have never had milk with hormones. They are little sticks with no other puberty signs.

 

Our pediatrician recommended switching to all organic dairy, I am just so surprised that the "normal" is so young now, I am surprised that 10 is average age - I was 13 and and figured I had until she was 10 or 11 before I had to worry about it!

 

My plan is to basically give biological facts as plainly as possible and keep all emotions out of it. My hope is to find a book that doesn't push any particular morality and just gives facts... I haven't looked at any yet that's why I was looking for suggestions. 

[Hunter]

This is on a related note, but what do y'all do with a child with early puberty & religious expectations that come with puberty? Continue to treat them as a child? Adult? Wing it?

 

I'm Muslim, and puberty starts the "adult" life in my faith. As a girl, dd would have certain expectations of her as a adult muslim woman, including fasting, wearing hijab, etc. The issue is I can easily see dd starting her cycle by age 9 or so {I was like 10.5 I think}, given the signs her body is putting forth now. But I don't see her being anywhere near ready to be an adult religiously at that age.

 

If my place of worship would allow it, I would let my child be a child. As much as possible. That is easier said than done, I know.

[mamabear2three]

Yes, talk to her. I'll try to find the book dd used. She also loved reading books on her own. I think it's best to be matter a fact and straight forward.

 

Yes I'd love to know what book she read! I might have to buy several and read them before I decide what will be appropriate to use now and what can wait until later.

[Tsutsie]

I wonder if their brains also develop faster, like teenager's brains would normally, if they start puberty early?

[twoxcell]

I read my dd The Care and Keeping of You a few months ago. She is 8. :)

[Chrysalis Academy]

It's not rBGH in my dd's case  - she's had only organic dairy, meat, eggs etc. her whole life, no soy, and she breast fed for 2 years.  She's just been an early bloomer since day 1.  

 

I definitely believe that stuff can lead to early puberty! Hence the choice to avoid it.  But, sometimes it just happens because you're wired that way.

[imagine.more]

I think if your daughter is under 90lbs you don't need to be too concerned about it happening within a year or two. Typically (though not always of course) girls hit puberty right around the point they hit 100lbs....which is why thinner/smaller girls like gymnasts tend to hit it later. Again, this isn't a hard and fast rule but it is a general guideline I was told by a nurse. So if your daughter hits 100lbs early then definitely be on the lookout for puberty to start any time. 

 

Anyway, my adoptive daughter got her first period at 9! It's been a bit of a struggle for her but now that she's 12 and her friends are hitting puberty it's evening out just a bit. My aunt got her period at 9 and her mother hadn't thought to explain it to her yet since she was so young. It started just before school and instead of going to school she hid in the laundry room crying all day, convinced something was horribly wrong with her. Her mom found out when she got home from work that afternoon! So yeah, my mom explained to my sister and I the ins and outs quite early (probably around 7) just in case because that experience was so traumatic for her younger sister. I plan to watch carefully for signs of puberty and if I can I'll wait until age 9-10 but if she shows signs I'll definitely explain things earlier. So since the doctor thinks her early teeth development might be a sign then I think it's worth considering broaching the topic gradually over the next couple of years. 

[Terabith]

I had always heard the weight thing, but my daughter was only 45 lbs when she started at age 8.  Now, she's gained 20 lbs in the last year, but she's still far from being overweight and she's at a Tanner stage 4. 

 

We always did organic milk/ meat/ etc from toddlerhood because of my personal history and my attempt to ameliorate the factors I could.

 

Yes, puberty does effect the brain.....hormonal swings, s*xual attraction, and even some evidence of teen cognitive growth.  The executive functioning skills are not typically present, however.

 

[IsabelC]

This is on a related note, but what do y'all do with a child with early puberty & religious expectations that come with puberty? Continue to treat them as a child? Adult? Wing it?

 

I'm Muslim, and puberty starts the "adult" life in my faith. As a girl, dd would have certain expectations of her as a adult muslim woman, including fasting, wearing hijab, etc. The issue is I can easily see dd starting her cycle by age 9 or so {I was like 10.5 I think}, given the signs her body is putting forth now. But I don't see her being anywhere near ready to be an adult religiously at that age.

I gather that back when the hijab after puberty thing started girls didn't hit puberty until about 15 or 16, so it would seem reasonable to modify it as long as you stay in keeping with the basic idea of modesty and having spiritual priorities. However I have also seen that many Muslims consider it a definite requirement, that if it was meant to be a specific age then that would have been revealed instead. Regarding Ramadan, I know that you are excused from fasting obligations for all kinds of health reasons, and given that bone development and brain development both continue after menarche, it should be OK to modify fasting requirements. Perhaps it would be a good idea to discuss puberty with other Muslim mothers?

 

 

I wonder if their brains also develop faster, like teenager's brains would normally, if they start puberty early?

The brain gets "rewired" during puberty, so to some extent a 10yo who has reached puberty might think differently from an otherwise similar 10yo who isn't going to start puberty until age 12. But as we know, that doesn't mean they magically acquire adult levels of reasoning and judgement. 

 

 

Yes I'd love to know what book she read! I might have to buy several and read them before I decide what will be appropriate to use now and what can wait until later.

I think pre-reading is a must for this kind of book, because some can be very different from others, and you could easily find there is stuff in there that you don't want your kid exposed to at this stage.

[justamouse]

My dd only had organic milk and she got the buds at 9. For her, I think it was genes (bc I developed early--I thought it was the Soy Formula I had been on as a baby. DD was breast fed until 2 and only had organic milk. I was very surprised when she developed early bc it blew my theories out of the water.)

 

Sometimes it IS just genetics, but I think that should be the outlier, not the norm.  That doesn't mean that I'm going to be giving them hormone milk. ;) Now that Drs are starting to catch on, hopefully we'll see more girls developing at later years. 

[Ali in OR]

Just another data point (or two):

 

My middle dd showed signs of entering puberty when she was still 8 (budding), a few months before her 9th birthday. We did a well-child check-up that year so I could confirm with her doctor that what I was seeing was in fact early puberty. I was concerned because dd was only 4'6" and I know not much growth happens after menarche. Her doctor wasn't worried at all and said that was still a ways off. Sure enough, dd grew 4 inches between age 9 and 10 and 3" the next year. Continued developing but didn't get her period until 12.5 years old (and grew less than .5" after that--she's just shy of 5'2"). She just had an early window for puberty.

 

Her sister is obviously on her own timetable. No signs of puberty at almost 11.5. Both have similar diets, not organic, regular milk--just different genes. I remember my mom telling the story of how she was a fluffy duck in her ballet class performance when she was in 5th grade--a full-grown, adult-sized fluffy duck, so she went through early puberty too back in the 40's/50's. My sister was also early, but I was not.

 

After that appointment with the doctor when my dd was 9, we read The Care and Keeping of You (the American Girl book) which dd would read over and over again. It's been a good book to have around for us.

[bluemongoose]

I am right there with you all.  I was not expecting this as I started very late at 15 and so did my mother before me.  I know nothing about DH side of the family, so I guess she could get her genes from them...she certainly favors his side in all other ways.

 

We have been mostly organic and we use hormone free milk and barely eat meat but it is hormone free too.

 

Anyway she is 9yo and we are just now starting buds and a bit of BO. She is sleeping a ton and eating a ton and a bit more weepy, though she has always been an emotional person. She is about 48lbs and 4'3". When we had her 9yo checkup in Jan she showed no signs whatsoever and the Dr said that was a good thing or she may not see 5'.  Lo and behold end of March the buds showed up.  I am trying not to freak out about it...I mean it is not the end of the world if she is only 5', but I think she will find it hard. People are tall in my family and my DH family with a few short stragglers intermixed in there.  She has always said she would be taller than me and I think she has her heart set on it.  Body image can be such a huge thing, I know it would be hard for her if she was shorter than I am.  I am hoping that she will grow a lot and the changes will be slow to give her time to get some height in there.

[Momling]

The "It's not the stork" and "Care and a keeping of You" are great suggestions for books. But a few thoughts...

First, my daughter had first signs of puberty at 7 at about the same time as she lost her first tooth. At 12, she still hasn't lost or grown in as many teeth as other kids... So I don't know that there is a tooth/puberty connection.

Also, I remember when she was 7 worrying that she'd start her period like at 9 or something... And while her development has been a bit on the early side, it was nothing concerning.

[Happy2BaMom]

My daughter is 8, so I'm watching this thread with interest. No signs on her, thank goodness.

 

I also wanted to pipe up about the endocrine disruptors. Yes, they are certainly in non-organic dairy and many non-organic fruits and some vegetables. But they are also in many, many other daily-use products, so modifying your diet will only reduce (not eliminate) your children's exposure to them. And while there are differences in individuals, overall, the rate of onset of puberty has dropped considerably in the last 30 years.

 

It worries me, but I can only try to protect my kids as I can.

[justamouse]

My daughter is 8, so I'm watching this thread with interest. No signs on her, thank goodness.

 

I also wanted to pipe up about the endocrine disruptors. Yes, they are certainly in non-organic dairy and many non-organic fruits and some vegetables. But they are also in many, many other daily-use products, so modifying your diet will only reduce (not eliminate) your children's exposure to them. And while there are differences in individuals, overall, the rate of onset of puberty has dropped considerably in the last 30 years.

 

It worries me, but I can only try to protect my kids as I can.

 

SO true. I should have stated that, too, that we swapped out all plastics, and did as much as we could (within reason, I'm using a computer!) in my home years ago. No plastic wrap, paraben free shampoos, you name it. 

 

Dd19 works at a completely organic hair salon and you are right, they are in everything we use as modern Americans. 

 

And it's starting to be more widely acknowledged. Here's an article from the Harvard Gazette with a pdf link to the Lancet study.   Here's an article from The Atlantic. It could even be epigenetic, and how much do we switch our children's normal hormones when we, as mothers are surrounded? This is all on chemical/brain research, but if that, then how much more endocrine disruptors? 

[Ameena]

Is there a good website or resource out there that lists all the foods / products that may contain endocrine disrupters in order of highest to lowest risk?

 

We eat a pretty conventional diet. I know our milk mostly is non-growth hormone milk, and we get organic occasionally when I can afford it. We do eat a lot of meat though, as both DD & myself do better on a high protein / high meat diet.

 

But dd has linea negra that showed up when she was 5 or so, and I know it is linked to endocrine issues. Her ped is watching it but isn't very concerned as she is convinced it just means dd is at risk for diabetes {we've checked & rechecked multiple times over the last 4 years for diabetes, and each time she passes with flying colors}.

 

 

Also - this probably sounds odd, but what exactly is "budding" when it comes to chest development? Not sure if dd is budding or not - {TMI} she has a little puffyness & what my guy friends in college used to call "asprins/m&m's on an ironing board". I never really went through budding that I recall - I jumped from nothing to a B cup in maybe 6 months when I was 10/11 or so, then in another 6mo I was a D/DD and that was it.

[Happy2BaMom]

Sorry, just getting back to this now. The resource I like best is the Environmental Working Group's Dirty Dozen List of Endocrine Disruptors. (I would link to it if I could - every time I try my screen freezes). EWG is a GREAT organization - they have lists for the most pesticide-ridden food, a cosmetics/skin care database, etc.

 

I also recommend the book Hormone Deception by Lindsey Berkson. I have also been meaning to read Slow Death by Rubber Duck and Our Stolen Future, but have not actually read them.

 

In short, we think we can dump all these chemicals into our soil, water and air via the products we manufacture and use and yet continue to believe that none of these harmful substances will circle back to bite us. It is, as Spock would say, a most curious way to live.

[TheBugs]

This is on a related note, but what do y'all do with a child with early puberty & religious expectations that come with puberty? Continue to treat them as a child? Adult? Wing it?

 

I'm Muslim, and puberty starts the "adult" life in my faith. As a girl, dd would have certain expectations of her as a adult muslim woman, including fasting, wearing hijab, etc. The issue is I can easily see dd starting her cycle by age 9 or so {I was like 10.5 I think}, given the signs her body is putting forth now. But I don't see her being anywhere near ready to be an adult religiously at that age.

 

Re: Early Puberty and Religious expectations

 

My daughter is almost eight. She is not showing any signs of puberty, but we have a friend, a tiny little eight year old girl, who is showing signs of puberty already and is developing rapidly. I had never thought about it, until discussing with her mother the early puberty. I realize that I will have to talk to my daughter about it earlier than I expected so she will understand what is going on with her friends. Although, I think she will take after me. I didn't start showing signs of puberty until 11/12 and I didn't get my period until age 14 1/2.

 

I am a Muslim. If  my daughter goes through puberty at 8 or 9, I will not require hijab or fasting. That will be my daughters choice, but I am wary of putting adult expectations on such young shoulders. I know others feel differently and I totally respect that. I believe that Islam is a reasonable religion. I also believe we have to test our children to see if they are mature enough for adult responsibilities. I think puberty is the beginning of becoming an adult, not the end of childhood.  Of course these are just my opinions and I am not a scholar.

 

I would be concerned about fasting when her growing body is going through so many changes and needing extra iron and calcium. So I would definitely discuss that with a doctor.  I also wouldn't discourage my daughter from fasting because it has many spiritual benefits, but I would proceed very carefully.  The most important issue is my daughter's self esteem in that regard, so she must know that she is in control of her body and spiritual life.

 

For a Muslim, my advice would be to pray Salat al-Istikharah, for guidance. And speak to a knowledgeable sister.

[mom2hunangirls]

Well, my almost 9 yr old who is having some development was dx today with central precocious puberty. They're doing further testing but may treat it bc there are some serious effects (socially, psychologically, and also with regards to adult height). So I would consider asking for a referral to a pediatric endocrinologist or at least a bone xray/ hormonal blood.

I agree with this. My friend's daughter had this and it was so rapid that they opted to give injections to stop the onset. It had a lot to do with her growth plates, though I don't know enough details. But I think it's definitely worth checking with a specialist.

[justamouse]

Campaign for Safe Cosmetics. 

 

they'll have the endocrine disruptors on there. 

[EndOfOrdinary]

My son is 9.5. We are definitely hitting testosterone surges. It is not just girls. His interest in sex is still minimal, but gracious is he moody as all get out. Moreover, he openly cannot explain why he is highly moody and that is not normal for him.

 

We are estrogenating both our food and water so extremely that this is to be expected. Science has been predicting it since the eighties.

[EndOfOrdinary]

This is on a related note, but what do y'all do with a child with early puberty & religious expectations that come with puberty? Continue to treat them as a child? Adult? Wing it?

 

I'm Muslim, and puberty starts the "adult" life in my faith. As a girl, dd would have certain expectations of her as a adult muslim woman, including fasting, wearing hijab, etc. The issue is I can easily see dd starting her cycle by age 9 or so {I was like 10.5 I think}, given the signs her body is putting forth now. But I don't see her being anywhere near ready to be an adult religiously at that age.

I honestly do not know large amounts about your faith, so I apologize in advance if I say something offensive or ridiculously impractical. It is ignorance on my part and not intended.

 

Is it possible to make the transition a bit longer? Could she be allowed smaller very selective amounts of food during a fasting like Ramadan? Like broth or juice? Given some important roles which stretch out over four to six years before she is given all of the weight of the religious expectations?

 

Could she wear the hijab, but recognize that she should still be allowed to do much of the silly things young girls are allowed to?

 

Is it possible for her to be seen as a partial adult who gets a few of her own choices, but still rests much of her authority with you? Could this be a process which goes on for a few years of transition? Almost like you are dolling out the experience as her judgement center starts to keep up with her body.

 

I personally find rights of passage that you are describing to be so important to a culture that I would hate for your daughter to miss out on the experience through nothing she had control over. I am currently planning my wedding without any family or females. I had no idea how much of a right of passage this is emotionally for women and how much it would effect me for my experience to be so very "un-normal." I have never been "girly", but somehow it is very difficult to not have a gaggle of giggly girls/women helping me transition into a new part of my life. I hope you can find a way to make the experience special for her!

[The Girls' Mom]

I have to say that growth does not always slow or stop early with early periods. I got mine at nine. My daughters all three got theirs at 10. We are all over 5'7". The twins were about 5'1" before they started, and the ped. said they would be lucky to grow another two inches. At 14, they are still growing with the tallest almost at 5'8".

[Mswin15]

Aside from the early onset of puberty I think it is great to have those conversations as a natural part of life as they grow up. My children are 4,6,8 and all of them know about the birth process. We've always used the official names for body parts and explained to them basic anatomy and function. We are Christians so we teach them in the context of how God made their bodies and for what great purpose. My oldest is 8 and she has know what a period was since she was probably 4. Just a basic age appropriate explanation of how a woman's body prepares for pregnancy each month. When the "how to babies get in a mommy's tummy?" questions have come we have said that babies start very small with a tiny part of a daddy and a tiny part of a mommy. The Usborne Body Book has a basic explanation of sperm and eggs so they understand those parts of the story.

 

Finally a few weeks ago I realized it was time to explain the "whole process" to my 8yo daughter and gave her a basic explanation of sex (once again in the context of how God made us). I really wanted to be the first one to talk to her about all of these things. It was SO not a big deal. I'm so glad I got to explain to her how her body would change one day and the baby making details. She got the facts, from me, in the context of our belief system. It really is just a long conversation that starts when they are little and continues as they get older. Don't hesitate to tell her how her body will change. I started developing when I was 7 years old and started my period when I was 10. I SO wish I would have had these conversations with my mom and felt good about the changes in my body instead of ashamed. 

[IsabelC]

:iagree:   It is really good to be able to teach information contextually, within the framework of your principles. All of us, whether religious or not, can have a positive but moral outlook on physical things, and communicate this to our dc.

[Little Women]

There have always been girls who started early, but it was not common as it is today.    I think there is something we are doing differently, either in milk as BGH or in our environment (many plastics are estrogenates and few of us can avoid them entirely).   

 

With my oldest, she was clearly starting to develop around 8yo, and it pretty much freaked me out.    I wound up cutting out milk with rBGH, and her development stopped entirely for several years.   She didn't really go back, but she did cease to move forward.    By the time she picked back up with developing, she was 11 or so, and started at 12yo.      None of my others developed early, after that.      I'm sure it's not the case for everyone, but in our case, I'm pretty sure it was something in the milk.   

[TheBugs]

Is it possible to make the transition a bit longer? Could she be allowed smaller very selective amounts of food during a fasting like Ramadan? Like broth or juice? Given some important roles which stretch out over four to six years before she is given all of the weight of the religious expectations?

 

Could she wear the hijab, but recognize that she should still be allowed to do much of the silly things young girls are allowed to?

 

Is it possible for her to be seen as a partial adult who gets a few of her own choices, but still rests much of her authority with you? Could this be a process which goes on for a few years of transition? Almost like you are dolling out the experience as her judgement center starts to keep up with her body.

 

I personally find rights of passage that you are describing to be so important to a culture that I would hate for your daughter to miss out on the experience through nothing she had control over. I am currently planning my wedding without any family or females. I had no idea how much of a right of passage this is emotionally for women and how much it would effect me for my experience to be so very "un-normal." I have never been "girly", but somehow it is very difficult to not have a gaggle of giggly girls/women helping me transition into a new part of my life. I hope you can find a way to make the experience special for her!

I think your advice is great and I love what you say about the importance of rights of passage. I missed a lot of that in my own upbringing (which was not Islamic, I am a convert).  It seems like there should be some sort of ceremonial aspect to starting the period.  It's fine to wear a hijab and still act like a child. You actually see that a lot in Muslim communities. Some Iittle girls want to just look like their mommies. In some families, little girls start wearing hijab before they hit puberty as part of the transition. And of course, many muslim women do not wear hijab, so it depends on the culture of the family.

 

And with the fasting, many families start having their children fast part time (usually around age 7). They might start just fasting until noon. 

[TheBugs]

She got the facts, from me, in the context of our belief system. It really is just a long conversation that starts when they are little and continues as they get older.

 

That's really great advice. It is a long conversation. We've been talking in little bits about the whole thing because I have endometriosis, so I get unwell around the time of my period and so I have explained about what the womb is and how it works.

 

I was thinking about this thread because I knew a woman from another country (where I guess they didn't have health class) who was the daughter of a single mom who didn't want the same fate to befall her daughter. She was taught to stay away from boys, but not explained how it all works. She went through puberty early. All she was taught about the period was that it meant that you could get pregnant. So as a young girl she was terrified. She didn't want to sit where a boy had been, or get too close at school. I guess the lesson I took from that is that is really important to give accurate information without instilling fear.

[ChrissySC]

I have always been open myself.  I begin by teaching the body parts early on.  I like to not use funny names, and I never have.  No matter which book you think you might read, do read it first!  I accidentally grabbed one that explained sex far too early and included oral.  Umm ... NO.  :lol:

 

Yet, as I read all of the concerns ... my dd started at 11, and at 13 is a triple D, 145 lbs, and 5'6.  Did you catch that she is 13?  We focus on balancing diet.  I think that much can be said about the changes in diet and our focus as parents to make our children healthy.  I am a robust 5'8 and 200 lbs, and this has been our concern with all of the girls.  Perhaps the early changes could equate to being a much healthier individual, and thus the body responds and matures quicker as a result?  Something to consider?

 

I do remember by second grade for both of the older girls that I had to purchase undershirts.  It was not but a grade or so later that I was looking for training wear or modified styles.  Their weight and height, all three of them, have always been above the norm but within proportional ranges.

 

Evolution of the human? 

[jbsoil]

When my ds went for his 8 year old check up at the Peds office, she noticed some early signs of puberty and sent us to the local children's hospital for bloodwork and x-rays.  His bloodwork came back normal, but his x-rays did show a bone age of an 11-12 year old.  Our ped said to be on the look out for other signs and to start discussing puberty with him.  Thankfully, no other signs have developed.  My girls (age 6) are already showing very early signs as well.  We've recently switched to organic milk and meats.  I'm hoping this will slow down their development.  I did not develop until a teenager, but dh was an early bloomer. 

[Guest]

I was just shy of 16 before any puberty signs appeared. This is typical for my family, though. My youngest sister started the earliest at 12. I am hoping dd will be somewhere in the middle. She has always been pretty much dairy free her whole life due to food allergies in the family anyway. Maybe that will help?

 

My sister suggested "How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex" by Linda and Richard Eyre

 

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_5_12?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=how+to+talk+to+your+kids+about+sex&sprefix=how+to+talk+%2Caps%2C239

 

She says "Where Did I Come From" is also good. 

 

http://www.amazon.com/Where-Did-I-Come-From/dp/0818402539/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_y

 

The same author has another book written for older kids, too.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Whats-Happening-Me-Guide-Puberty/dp/0818403128/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_y

[ChocolateReignRemix]

I was at the pediatrician today with my 6 year old, and found out that puberty can start as young as 7 these days and still be considered "normal" in the medical field. My daughter is already getting her 12 year molars and her ped. thinks she may start going through puberty as young as 9...  

 

She also highly recommended talking to my daughter about puberty within the next year if not sooner, so that if her friends go through it earlier than her, it has already been covered at home. She also said if we start the conversation now, it makes it that much easier to keep talking about it as she gets older, which does make sense.

 

She's already learned some when I had our baby boy just over a year ago. (she wanted to know how we would know if it was a boy or girl, so we got some basic parts down) But I my head is spinning because I figured I didn't need to even think about this until she was 10 or 11. 

 

Thoughts? Suggestions on books that are age appropriate but cover everything? The book I went over with her before just talked about basic body parts.

 

What your doctor told you does not fit the current diagnostic criteria for precocious puberty (which is different than early puberty.) Pubarche before 8, thelarche before 7 and menarcge before 10 are the current thresholds for precocious puberty.

 

Basically, precocious puberty is a possible medical condition while early puberty is simply a child entering puberty at the low end of normal.

 

Contrary to what have been stating above, there is not strong evidence for bovine growth hormones playing a role in early puberty.  Obesity is currently a significant risk factor, and there is evidence for xenoestrogens playing a role in early puberty.

Oddly enough, the newest research is showing that boys are starting to enter puberty slightly later, which also seems to be related to obesity.

 

And just as an FYI, the current median age of menarche in the US is 12.43.  In 1973 the median was 12.75 so there has not been a significant decline as many seem to believe.  There is evidence for a significant decline the median since the 1840s based on data from Europe, however that decline appears to be caused by increased caloric intakes and better nutrition.