No-shoes houses in sandal weather

[poppy]

I see that you think that I am incredibly rude. But that is okay because I have thick skin. ;)

 

Actually, when I do have non Asian guests over, I give consideration to their worries about stinky feet or fungus issues and provide my unused disposable slippers from my airline travels. I never ask guests to remove socks. Actually, most guests assume this courtesy and remove their shoes without my having to ask. I am guessing that they assume this is my preference because I am Asian.

 

I understand your embarrassment issue. Honestly, I do. But I don't believe that a guest or a stranger has the right to do whatever they want in my home either. So yes, "c'est la vie!" And people, the best policy is to always consider the other person. That is why I do the best that I can and provide slippers since we have a no shoe (not no sock) policy.

 

Sorry, I should have used past tense, I used to think it was incredibly rude.  Obviously I've come around to the c'est la vie thing.   

 

I think most guests remove shoes not because you're Asian but because they probably notice you removing your shoes when you enter, and they probably see a pile of shoes in the entry to the house. I think that is just common sense and how most people handle it, for any culture.

 

I am a little curious about whether no-shoes people remove their shoes if the hosts do not?

[skimomma]

LOL.  No, my floors are not always covered in mud, leaves, etc. 

 

We wipe our shoes any time we come in.  If it's yucky outside, we take them off.  If some mud gets in, we clean that area.  If it's rainy, we put a towel or old (washable) rug on the floor and take our shoes off there.   Sure, occasionally someone will track something in without noticing but that's rare and we clean it right up.  We also clean up our dog's poop and don't leave it in the yard for people to walk in. 

 

So we are not tromping through the house with mud and dog poop all over our shoes and leaving it there.  :lol:  

 

If that's the image people have of those of us who don't require guests to take their shoes off, it's no wonder you are disgusted by us. :lol: :lol:

 

Well, FTR, I did not say I was disgusted.....just curious.  :001_smile:

 

In our case, it is a moot point because we where huge knobby winter boots for 6 months of the year and "wiping them off" would do nothing to stop the tracking.  Plus, who wants to wear those indoors anyway?  I don't even have a dog but we live in the city and the snowplow is always dumping things in our driveway, sidewalk, and yard that come from other locations.

 

I realize people have different experiences, I just wondered what people who lived in less harsh climates might expect to experience.  It rains everywhere sometimes.  I wondered if people tended to clean their floors more often than I do or if there is a different tolerance level for dirty floors.  We are used to very clean floors and we don't clean them often, so walking in with shoes on even just a normal day would require more effort on my part to keep the same standard we are used to.  

[skimomma]

Shoes on is pretty normal everywhere I have lived.  Pennsylvania, Ohio, Massachusetts, New Hampshire.  So you can chose to think most people in those states let their kids play on floors covered in unfathomable filth. Or you can just think of it as a cultural preference that really doesn't make much difference either way.

 

 

I think you took my question a to a bit more of an extreme than I intended.  I was really just curious as to how the inevitable tracking was handled.  We have had the occasional repair person come into the house during the winter who did not take off their boots (of course) and cleaning up the tracking of slush/salt/mud was more than a minor chore.  Obviously the climate, layout of house, floor material, etc.... will result in different amounts of tracking.   I honestly do not have any emotional attachment to the practice either way.  I swear!

[marbel]

Well, FTR, I did not say I was disgusted.....just curious.  :001_smile:

 

In our case, it is a moot point because we where huge knobby winter boots for 6 months of the year and "wiping them off" would do nothing to stop the tracking.  Plus, who wants to wear those indoors anyway?  I don't even have a dog but we live in the city and the snowplow is always dumping things in our driveway, sidewalk, and yard that come from other locations.

 

I realize people have different experiences, I just wondered what people who lived in less harsh climates might expect to experience.  It rains everywhere sometimes.  I wondered if people tended to clean their floors more often than I do or if there is a different tolerance level for dirty floors.  We are used to very clean floors and we don't clean them often, so walking in with shoes on even just a normal day would require more effort on my part to keep the same standard we are used to.  

 

Others had said they found it disgusting.  So it was more of a general "y'all who find it disgusting" not you personally. 

 

 

[marbel]

When I say "it's a cultural thing" about Asians feeling like houses should be shoes off, I just mean it's the norm in terms of etiquette for cleanliness sake. I never meant to imply it was some ancient tradition or religious observance.

 

Obviously as we've seen in this thread different culture have different customs. Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off.  Apparently in Canada, it's shoes on.   In both cases I would say "it's a cultural thing".  As opposed to "Southerns like clean houses and Canadians like vomit and feces on their floors."  Or "Southerns don't care about guest's comfort while Canadians do".

 

 

I don't live in the south but my husband from Georgia didn't grow up in a shoes-off house.  His southern relatives all wear shoes indoors and think we're weird that we walk around in socks. 

 

I should have done a poll.  :cool:

[Arcadia]

See, the party thing is where it really strikes me as weird. Over for coffee or a playdate, sure, I can roll with no shoes. But a party? The thought of all these people carefully getting ready and picking out a great outfit . . . and then wandering around in house slippers, idk, it just cracks me up.

 

My friends with no shoe policy have their parties in their backyard so problem solved :)

 

ETA:

My dining room and kitchen floors are tiled. You are welcome to keep your shoes on as it is easy to clean up any dirt tracks. It is the carpeted areas that my hubby has issue with.

[Lady Florida.]

 I have a burning question for all of you who always wear your shoes indoors:  Are your floors always covered in water, mud, sand, pine needles, and gravel?!?!?  .  On any given day, there is a 70% chance that the ground right outside every door of my house has either snow, slush, water, road salt, mud, gravel, pine needles, dog poo, or a mixture of some/all of the above. 

 

No, not at all. Of course there's never slush here  :lol: but also it's unlikely that there will be anything else to track in, including mud. Sand is gets tracked in of course, but even if everyone took their shoes off at the door, the dog would bring it in, or it would blow in. Speaking of dogs (segue to dog poo) our dog goes in the back yard not the front. We clean it up daily, or every other day at least. Neighbors are considerate enough to not allow their dogs to go in other people's front yards, or if they do they clean it up. You rarely see anyone around here walking a dog who isn't carrying clean up bags. I do know people who have issues with neighbors allowing their dogs to poo in someone else's yard and not cleaning it up. Naturally, it's usually in the yard of someone who doesn't have a dog, or doesn't even like dogs. We're fortunate to not have that problem in our neighborhood.

 

 

 

Obviously as we've seen in this thread different culture have different customs. Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off.  Apparently in Canada, it's shoes on.   In both cases I would say "it's a cultural thing".  As opposed to "Southerns like clean houses and Canadians like vomit and feces on their floors."  Or "Southerns don't care about guest's comfort while Canadians do".

 

 

I think there are two different "cultures", for lack of a better word here. One is that if you are someone's guest you feel honored and you want to make your host as comfortable as possible. The other is that if someone is your guest, you feel honored and want to make them as comfortable as possible. I come from the latter, and fortunately so does dh. Neither is wrong. They're just different but that's probably why those of us on each side are a bit thrown off by the other's view. We all want to show respect, but some of us think the bigger amount of respect should come from the host while others think it should come from the guest.

 

I just wondered what people who lived in less harsh climates might expect to experience.  It rains everywhere sometimes.  I wondered if people tended to clean their floors more often than I do or if there is a different tolerance level for dirty floors.  We are used to very clean floors and we don't clean them often, so walking in with shoes on even just a normal day would require more effort on my part to keep the same standard we are used to.  

 

That makes sense that you would have questions. It rains during the rainy season here and is dry most of the time during the dry season. Obviously it doesn't snow, so that's never an issue. We don't have "real" dirt. Our dirt, our soil, is sand. Sand just isn't that dirty, even when wet. However, I did live in NJ the first 14 years of my life, and we only knew a few people who were no-shoes people. They were considered odd. Most people wore and/or allowed shoes in their house. In winter, people wore boots over their shoes, so you just took those off at the entrance, and your shoes were clean. 

[Lady Florida.]

You rarely see anyone around here walking a dog who isn't carrying clean up bags. 

 

Quoting myself. I must have missed this when I previewed, however the dogs often are carrying clean up bags. :D   Bags On Board are pretty popular around here. 

[zoobie]

When I say "it's a cultural thing" about Asians feeling like houses should be shoes off, I just mean it's the norm in terms of etiquette for cleanliness sake. I never meant to imply it was some ancient tradition or religious observance.

 

Obviously as we've seen in this thread different culture have different customs. Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off. Apparently in Canada, it's shoes on. In both cases I would say "it's a cultural thing". As opposed to "Southerns like clean houses and Canadians like vomit and feces on their floors." Or "Southerns don't care about guest's comfort while Canadians do".

 

I'm a native Southerner and thought shoes off was an Elsewhere thing. Shoes off would be highly informal and simply not done by the old school generation. My grandmother wore stockings until she wasn't able to pull them up herself, even when she wasn't planning on leaving the house. Bare feet to her meant poverty (she grew up the oldest of 11 children of a sharecropper before the Depression and didn't notice the Depression because wasn't everyone dirt poor?). You wore shoes, and your best shoes, to someone's house. Though my friend's grandmother who has always been wealthy told me she could tell I had been "raised right" because I didn't kick my shoes off at the door. Ha!

 

Anyway, I've never had anyone be rude about the preference. If there are no shoes in a pile at the door, I keep mine on. If there's a pile, I ask. :)

[Lady Florida.]

Shoes off would be highly informal and simply not done by the old school generation. 

 

Yes, this too. If you took your shoes off in someone's house it meant you were very comfortable there. It was only done in the home of family or such close friends that they were like family. To take them off in the home of someone you didn't know well would be to presume a level of familiarity that you didn't actually have.

[Pawz4me]

I have a burning question for all of you who always wear your shoes indoors:  Are your floors always covered in water, mud, sand, pine needles, and gravel?!?!?  My house would be a horrible mess after one day if we wore shoes inside.  On any given day, there is a 70% chance that the ground right outside every door of my house has either snow, slush, water, road salt, mud, gravel, pine needles, dog poo, or a mixture of some/all of the above.  I cannot fathom cleaning that up every day.  Nor can I imagine how uncomfortable it would be for kids to play on the floors or for someone who chooses to go barefoot.  I could see it in an apartment or somewhere where it is always dry and warm, but not in any locations I have ever lived.  I do not know anyone IRL that wears shoes indoors so it is never a real discussion, but every time this topic comes up, I so want to ask!

 

We are most definitely a "shoes on" kind of family, and I think our floors are pretty clean.  We have good quality mats outside each door, and everyone learned from a very young age how to properly wipe their shoes off before coming inside. :)  Our main in/out doors are both accessed through the kitchen, and I vacuum that floor once a day (mainly because of pet hair) and mop once a week.  It's close to mop time and I promise you could walk around in white socks and not pick up any dirt.

 

I also keep throw rugs inside each door, but those rarely get much of anything on them.  I shake them out once a week before mopping.

 

FWIW, I don't know anyone IRL who routinely takes their shoes off when coming inside.  I've never met anyone who did it, and I'm 51.

 

ETA:  We have a good stand of grass in our yard and concrete garage, driveway, porch and patio.  No mud, gravel or pine straw anywhere around, and dog poo is cleaned up twice a day, plus the dogs do their business in back corners of the yard where no one usually walks.  So there's nothing at all icky right outside any of our doors.  On the few days a year when we get ice, sleet or snow . .  well, mostly we just stay inside on those days and wait for it to go away. ;)  If we can't do that then we take boots off in the garage unless they're just wet.  If they're just wet then wiping off on the mat takes care of it.

 

[Pawz4me]

When I say "it's a cultural thing" about Asians feeling like houses should be shoes off, I just mean it's the norm in terms of etiquette for cleanliness sake. I never meant to imply it was some ancient tradition or religious observance.

 

Obviously as we've seen in this thread different culture have different customs. Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off.  Apparently in Canada, it's shoes on.   In both cases I would say "it's a cultural thing".  As opposed to "Southerns like clean houses and Canadians like vomit and feces on their floors."  Or "Southerns don't care about guest's comfort while Canadians do".

 

 

I've lived in NC all of my 51 years and have never met any "shoes off" people.  Never.  It would be considered extremely rude here to ask someone to remove their shoes before coming into your home.  If someone wanted to take their shoes off I would be okay with it, but I would think it was weird unless it was family or a close friend who I knew preferred being shoeless.

[Anne]

In Alaska, most homes I have been in are "shoes off".  I can't think of anyone I know who has a "shoes ON" home. 

 

I have never asked anyone to remove their shoes in my house, but I've never had anyone keep them on, either (except visitors from out of state!!)

 

Anne

[Hunter's Moon]

I always thought it was rude to take my shoes off in someone's home, unless of course they request it. I feel like I am taking the liberty to do something that is personal.

 

I don't know. I guess I am a weirdo. :-P

[a27mom]

I used to be a shoes off person in my home, but would have considered it rude to take my shoes off; and odd to be asked to take my shoes off in the home of someone who was not family or a very close friend, unless I accidentally walked someplace very dirty, (though why would I do that on my way into someone's home? ). I don't have any friends who have "no shoes for guests" homes. And even though most people I know take their own shoes off in there homes generally, you usually put shoes on while you are hosting a gathering,

 

I have to wear shoes now because of foot pain. (I used to be barefoot all the time I was home so that theory doesn't work for me.) so if you make me take my shoes off I would have to walk to a chair and stay there pretty much the entire visit.

 

Most people where I live have walkways to their home which are cleared when guests are coming, so guests are not walking through mud etc. to enter someone's home. People generally don't tromp through dirt if they are going to a gathering at someone's home, because you try to keep your shoes clean. I teach that to my children quite regularly. Also everyone has mats to wipe your shoes. If you were doing something earlier which might cause your shoes to be dirty you have shoes to change into in the car. It is really not an issue for normal visits.

 

Of course it is pretty normal around here for people to sit on the ground outdoors. So what little residual that would be on someone's shoe in your home is not a health issue. Kids are encouraged to dig in the dirt around here as well, so playing on a carpet that had shoes on it, not a problem.

[katilac]

  Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off.   

 

 

I don't think so. I've lived in Louisiana, Florida, and Tennessee and I have never been asked to take my shoes off. Here in Louisiana, we go barefoot a lot, and we think we're being NICE when we put on shoes to visit someone, lol. 

 

I have never encountered any sort of conflict over this issue IRL, but I have a burning question for all of you who always wear your shoes indoors:  Are your floors always covered in water, mud, sand, pine needles, and gravel?!?!?   

 

We don't have snow or slush. We have plenty of dirt, dust, leaves, and pine needles. People wipe their shoes off before entering. If it's super messy outside, we might add an indoor mat as well, or even a towel as well if it's a casual teen thing. We have a brick foyer, so even if they're slack about wiping their feet, just walking on 2 mats and a towel to get inside takes care of the worst of it. 

 

With limited or sedate company, we don't notice much difference. With 20 careless teenagers, yes, we have to sweep, mop, and vacuum when they leave. We would have to do this even if they had the world's cleanest feet in brand new slippers, though - they seem to exude dirt and crumbs. 

 

I can certainly imagine people taking off big boots if they're trudging through the snow, but I figured they would trade them for regular shoes once inside, not just go around in socks. I guess you have to hope people have those heated floors!

[Lady Florida.]

Most people where I live have walkways to their home which are cleared when guests are coming, so guests are not walking through mud etc. to enter someone's home. People generally don't tromp through dirt if they are going to a gathering at someone's home, because you try to keep your shoes clean. I teach that to my children quite regularly. Also everyone has mats to wipe your shoes. If you were doing something earlier which might cause your shoes to be dirty you have shoes to change into in the car. It is really not an issue for normal visits.

 

 

 

Yes. Just like the poster who was trying to picture the dirty floors of those of us who don't have a no shoes rule, I'm trying to picture homes where you have to tromp through the mud to reach the front door and when you get there, there isn't even a mat to wipe your shoes.  :confused1:

[skimomma]

 

 

I can certainly imagine people taking off big boots if they're trudging through the snow, but I figured they would trade them for regular shoes once inside, not just go around in socks. I guess you have to hope people have those heated floors!

 

It is the general rule around here to bring slippers when visiting people.  I always do because my feet get very cold and most people do not heat their houses above 60 degrees in the winter.  Many people have a basket of slippers and/or big wool socks for guests to wear if wanted/needed.

 

I will say that I have never asked anyone to take their shoes off.  Because it is the general local practice, everyone just does.  In fact, more than once we have had elderly visitors and I thought it was probably too much trouble for them to take off their shoes.  I told them they were free to leave them on and that it was fine, but none ever took me up on the offer.  If someone did leave their shoes on, I would never ask them to remove them.  The mountain of shoes and boots piled on everyone's boot porches is sort of the implied "request."

 

On a funny side note, I threw dh a surprise birthday party many years ago.  I had about 40 people in my home waiting for dh to come so we could surprise him.  It was winter.  It was easy enough to hide the cars.....I had them all park on different streets.  But I did not even think about the boots until people started arriving and asked what to do.  There was no way dh was going to miss 40 extra pairs of boots piled on the boot porch.  We had to do some fast work with a couple of empty garbage cans (with lids) to hide the evidence.  So, there are definitely logistical downsides to the no-shoe policy! 

[skimomma]

Yes. Just like the poster who was trying to picture the dirty floors of those of us who don't have a no shoes rule, I'm trying to picture homes where you have to tromp through the mud to reach the front door and when you get there, there isn't even a mat to wipe your shoes.  :confused1:

 

I wish I could show you my house right now.  A mat is not even going to touch what we are walking through to get around.  Our whole boot porch is lined with mats.  The floor of my car looks like a mud pie with sprinkles right now.  We are still wearing winter boots every day but plenty of standing water and mud is mixed with the melting snow.  And those darned PINE NEEDLES.  Those will be the death of me.  Despite not wearing our boots/shoes indoors, those needles are everywhere.  

[QueenCat]

When I say "it's a cultural thing" about Asians feeling like houses should be shoes off, I just mean it's the norm in terms of etiquette for cleanliness sake. I never meant to imply it was some ancient tradition or religious observance.

 

Obviously as we've seen in this thread different culture have different customs. Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off.  Apparently in Canada, it's shoes on.   In both cases I would say "it's a cultural thing".  As opposed to "Southerns like clean houses and Canadians like vomit and feces on their floors."  Or "Southerns don't care about guest's comfort while Canadians do".

 

 

It's not a southern thing......... I've lived in the south for 26 years. Only twice have I been asked to leave the shoes at the door. Both were by Asian families (one Japanese, one Korean). When it's muddy out, kids do leave their shoes on the porch.

 

[ItoLina]

I live in Hawaii and every house here is "shoes off". It would be really weird to keep your shoes on, though I don't think most people would be offended by it. It would just be like wearing a big giant flashing sign that says "I am not from here". Lol. I have lived here for 13 years now, and I find that when I go back to the mainland to visit relatives I feel really weird leaving my shoes ON when I go into a house, like in am being rude or something. My kids were totally confused when we went back to the mainland. They automatically took their shoes off and left them at the door everywhere we went. Most of our friends and relatives found it amusing. :-) So I think it is totally just what you are used to.

 

Kids and adults alike here also all run around barefoot....everywhere, indoors, out doors, etc. I do require my kids to wear shoes outside. I find it gross to run around a playground or other public area in bare feet, but I don't feel like it's gross to go barefoot in someone's house.

 

That said, my dad just can't bring himself to take his shoes off when he visits, it makes him feel uncomfortable, so he wears shoes in our house and it doesn't bother me.

[Above The Rowan]

When I say "it's a cultural thing" about Asians feeling like houses should be shoes off, I just mean it's the norm in terms of etiquette for cleanliness sake. I never meant to imply it was some ancient tradition or religious observance.

 

Obviously as we've seen in this thread different culture have different customs. Apparently in the US South, it's shoes off. Apparently in Canada, it's shoes on. In both cases I would say "it's a cultural thing". As opposed to "Southerns like clean houses and Canadians like vomit and feces on their floors." Or "Southerns don't care about guest's comfort while Canadians do".

 

I have lived on the west coast, east coast, and now all over Ontario and haven't yet met anyone or been in anyone's home who did NOT take off shoes upon entering. It's not even something that has ever had to be requested, it's just done.

 

So I would say its not a regional thing even, as much as just a personal preference?

 

I was completely FLOORED at how many people on this board from Canada said in another thread once that leaving shoes on was normal for them - I had always just assumed that MOST if not all homes in Canada were No Shoe Zones lol. Mind blown.

 

I am with skimom - i can't even imagine what he state of my floors would be if we left shoes on. If its not snow here, it's mud.

 

Plus I am barefoot at almost all times, or as much as I can get away with given how cold it is here lol. I can't imagine wearing shoes all of the time.

[marbel]

It is the general rule around here to bring slippers when visiting people.  I always do because my feet get very cold and most people do not heat their houses above 60 degrees in the winter.  Many people have a basket of slippers and/or big wool socks for guests to wear if wanted/needed.

 

<snip>

 

So, that kinds grosses me out.  I really don't want to put on slippers that other people have worn.  I don't know if they have athlete's foot or toenail fungus, kwim?  And they don't know if I do. 

 

Great story about the party though.

 

Boot porch?   A porch just for boots?  Everyone has one?  

[Sun]

It is the general rule around here to bring slippers when visiting people.  I always do because my feet get very cold and most people do not heat their houses above 60 degrees in the winter.  Many people have a basket of slippers and/or big wool socks for guests to wear if wanted/needed.

 

:svengo:  Oh my goodness! Where do you live that people keep their houses so cold? Most of the houses that I go in around here are 68-72 in the winter. 60 sounds very, very cold to me for an indoor temperature!

[skimomma]

So, that kinds grosses me out.  I really don't want to put on slippers that other people have worn.  I don't know if they have athlete's foot or toenail fungus, kwim?  And they don't know if I do. 

 

Great story about the party though.

 

Boot porch?   A porch just for boots?  Everyone has one?  

 

I'm with you on the slippers.  I always bring my own.  And I guess no one would really wear them without socks but I still wouldn't be too excited about it.  My neighbor's basket is filled with thinner washable slippers (Dearskin, I think) and she washes those after every use.  The big wool socks are a different story.  I do offer those to people but again, they are usually worn with socks and I wash them between wearings.  

 

A boot porch is the catch-all term for an enclosed porch.  Most people here have them.  Some are part of the actual house (that is the case with ours) while others are temporary plywood structures that people add to their main doors October-May.  They serve mainly as an air lock so that when you open the door you are not getting a direct blast of cold air into your living space.  But this is also where people put on and take off boots/shoes and cleats.  You usually store them there as well.  Ours is nice and big so we have seating to make putting boots on easier, a few hooks for really wet/snowy/muddy outwear, and I also keep our garbage/recycling bins, snow shovels, gaiters, snowshoes, and such out there.  We do not use any other doors during the winter (except in an emergency).  Very elaborate ones have closets, boot heaters, and other goodies.  

[solascriptura]

So, that kinds grosses me out. I really don't want to put on slippers that other people have worn. I don't know if they have athlete's foot or toenail fungus, kwim? And they don't know if I do.

 

Great story about the party though.

 

Boot porch? A porch just for boots? Everyone has one?

But don't you try shoes on at the store that others have tried on? Although most stores provide those barely there stockings, I rarely see people wearing them.

[solascriptura]

It's not a southern thing......... I've lived in the south for 26 years. Only twice have I been asked to leave the shoes at the door. Both were by Oriental families (one Japanese, one Korean). When it's muddy out, kids do leave their shoes on the porch.

 

Please, refer to us as Asians. Not Oriental. I am saying this in the kindest way possible.

[solascriptura]

While we are a shoes off home, I usually defer to the host's preferences. actually, I am surprised at the strong opinions that this thread has brought out! I must say, the people here definitely have a lot of strong opinions. ;)

[Cammie]

I live in a "shoes off" culture.  No one is asked to take them off, people just do it.  There are no slippers or booties for the guests at the door either!  Often, if it looks like too much trouble you might mention "oh, its ok, you can leave them on" but most people won't do it.  For a party in my neighborhood most ladies will leave on fancy high heels or other dress shoes that go with the outfit.  My dh has been known to decide what socks to wear depending on whether or not he thinks he will have to remove his shoes wherever he is going.  It is just the polite thing to do.  It is funny how living in a culture changes perceptions.  When we watch US TV we are horrified to see shoes on furniture, shoes on beds, shoes everywhere!

[laundrycrisis]

I would take neon colored ankle socks.  I wouldn't mind being conspicuous about it - I would show off my bright socks and smile while doing it.

 

If someone wants my shoes off, fine, but that doesn't mean I want to go barefoot in their house, so I won't. 

[BlsdMama]

As a mama with crawlers, we don't do shoes in the house. When we were looking for a house to buy, a functional entry way where kids and guests could remove shoes was really important to me.

 

My skin crawls at the idea of Cate crawling through filth on her hands and knees and putting her sweet little hands in her mouth.

 

I don't ask guests to take off their shoes, but I definitely prefer it. I never thought of a cute little sign or odd slippers but I love both ideas.

 

To the mama who said she's lived in the South for a while but never been asked to remove shoes except by Asian families, I have to ask if your mother is Southern? The reason I ask is because must Southern families are hospitable to the extreme and would not ask a guest to remove their sites. I would not. (And I am not Southern, I would just feel uncomfortable asking but actually have a preference.) But if you watch, I suspect you would notice several families who do not wear shoes in their homes and their children remove their shoes at the door. ;)

 

It never occurred to me actually that it would be okay to leave shoes in while visiting someone's home.

[BlsdMama]

As a mama with crawlers, we don't do shoes in the house. When we were looking for a house to buy, a functional entry way where kids and guests could remove shoes was really important to me.

 

My skin crawls at the idea of Cate crawling through filth on her hands and knees and putting her sweet little hands in her mouth.

 

I don't ask guests to take off their sites, but I definitely prefer it. I never thought of a cute little sign or odd slippers but I love both ideas.

 

It never occurred to me actually that it would be okay to leave shoes in while visiting someone's home.

[SproutMamaK]

I have lived on the west coast, east coast, and now all over Ontario and haven't yet met anyone or been in anyone's home who did NOT take off shoes upon entering. It's not even something that has ever had to be requested, it's just done.

 

I'm with you as far as the Canadian contigent goes. I've never been to anyone's home in Ontario where anyone has kept their shoes on (except possibly delivery people, lol). If someone continues to wear their shoes in the house, most people would probably think they were really distracted by the conversation or something similar and forgot to remove them.

[Above The Rowan]

When we watch US TV we are horrified to see shoes on furniture, shoes on beds, shoes everywhere!

Ditto this!

[QueenCat]

:svengo:  Oh my goodness! Where do you live that people keep their houses so cold? Most of the houses that I go in around here are 68-72 in the winter. 60 sounds very, very cold to me for an indoor temperature!

 

That's what I was thinking............ people tend to heat higher, not lower than me............ and mine is around 68.

[QueenCat]

Please, refer to us as Asians. Not Oriental. I am saying this in the kindest way possible.

 

My apologies.......... I edited it.... when I was initially writing, I had a brain freeze as I knew it wasn't the best choice in words but I forgot what was........... old age.

 

[QueenCat]

To the mama who said she's lived in the South for a while but never been asked to remove shoes except by Asian families, I have to ask if your mother is Southern? The reason I ask is because must Southern families are hospitable to the extreme and would not ask a guest to remove their sites. I would not. (And I am not Southern, I would just feel uncomfortable asking but actually have a preference.) But if you watch, I suspect you would notice several families who do not wear shoes in their homes and their children remove their shoes at the door. ;)

 

It never occurred to me actually that it would be okay to leave shoes in while visiting someone's home.

 

That was me. My mother isn't southern. But it is rare that others have a place where I could imagine putting my shoes. Nor do others take their shoes off, and I still have them on. Adults certainly keep their shoes on in the areas I've lived, for the most part. They might be in slippers if I've shown up for just a quick drop in, to drop something off....... or barefoot in the summer. They'd look at me like I was nuts if I just took my shoes off. And I'd find it bizarre if a guest took their shoes off at the door when they walked in my house.

[Lady Florida.]

 

 

Boot porch?   A porch just for boots?  Everyone has one?  

 

Oh good. I'm not the only one who wondered about that. 

 

I'm so happy to live in a warm climate. I know many people don't like our summers or our bugs or they want four seasons. That's great if you like it, but I don't want to live some place where a boot porch is even necessary.

[marbel]

But don't you try shoes on at the store that others have tried on? Although most stores provide those barely there stockings, I rarely see people wearing them.

 

I wear them.  I take my own in case the store doesn't have them.   Or, I take the type of socks I'd be likely to wear with the shoes.  I don't wear shoes other than sandals without socks. 

[a27mom]

I have lived on the west coast, east coast, and now all over Ontario and haven't yet met anyone or been in anyone's home who did NOT take off shoes upon entering. It's not even something that has ever had to be requested, it's just done.

 

So I would say its not a regional thing even, as much as just a personal preference?

 

I was completely FLOORED at how many people on this board from Canada said in another thread once that leaving shoes on was normal for them - I had always just assumed that MOST if not all homes in Canada were No Shoe Zones lol. Mind blown.

 

I am with skimom - i can't even imagine what he state of my floors would be if we left shoes on. If its not snow here, it's mud.

 

Plus I am barefoot at almost all times, or as much as I can get away with given how cold it is here lol. I can't imagine wearing shoes all of the time.

Lol. I have lived on the west coast, east coast, Midwest, and my mom is from Ontario so I visit there frequently. I have never known anyone who expected guests at a gathering to remove their shoes upon entering the home. Close friends and family yes, but it seems presumptuous in the home of an acquaintance.

 

For those who are concerned about their crawlers on the floor, do you let them play outside and crawl in the grass? I don't really see the difference...

[poppy]

As a mama with crawlers, we don't do shoes in the house. When we were looking for a house to buy, a functional entry way where kids and guests could remove shoes was really important to me.

 

My skin crawls at the idea of Cate crawling through filth on her hands and knees and putting her sweet little hands in her mouth.

 

I don't ask guests to take off their shoes, but I definitely prefer it. I never thought of a cute little sign or odd slippers but I love both ideas.

 

To the mama who said she's lived in the South for a while but never been asked to remove shoes except by Asian families, I have to ask if your mother is Southern? The reason I ask is because must Southern families are hospitable to the extreme and would not ask a guest to remove their sites. I would not. (And I am not Southern, I would just feel uncomfortable asking but actually have a preference.) But if you watch, I suspect you would notice several families who do not wear shoes in their homes and their children remove their shoes at the door. ;)

 

It never occurred to me actually that it would be okay to leave shoes in while visiting someone's home.

 

Well, I think just about everyone on this board is or has been "a mama with crawlers".    As for the bolded, an analogy might be, if everyone in your neighborhood was a nudist, would you feel comfy having the kiddo play on the couch where bare bums have been, then sticking those hands in her mouth? Saying this as someone who's a little grossed out by other people's bare feet.  I know some people have "house slippers" but I've never seen these even once in my 40 years on earth.

 

I do watch the host for cues about whether they prefer shoes on or off. I think that's common courtesy. I wouldn't dream of taking off my shoes if the hosts left theirs on.  And that's how it is probably 90% of the time. 

 

I did go to a church meeting where I walked in to a home I'd never been in before, and saw a ton of shoes in the mud room, so I took mine off and threw them into the pile...... then I realized that was just the family's shoe storage, and everyone else in the meeting was dressed formally and with shoes.  Including the host.  Whoops! I felt silly. But luckily I had on a lovely pair of wool socks, not my normal slightly-dingy whites, so it was all good.

[joannqn]

When I read a thread like this, I wonder if part of the reason Americans have foot problems is we do wear shoes all the time. Honestly, I couldn't stay in a house where I couldn't wear my shoes with the amount of arch support I need. I would have to apologize and leave, it would not be worth the pain.

 

I could when I was 20 and living in Japan, and I don't remember people there having a arch problem without shoes (although maybe I just didn't pay attention). I know my chiropractor has encouraged me to stretch and strengthen my feet and to try to go shoeless for short periods, and perhaps this is part of it - maybe be people like me have enabled our feet not to tolerate going shoeless.

 

But in any case, I can't. Sad, I know. No one in the states has asked me to, and I don't think I could do it for more than a few minutes even to be polite.

I was a barefoot as often as I could manage until I developed foot problems.  Now I have to wear shoes if I want to be on my feet long enough to do chores or cook dinner.

 

 

I have never encountered any sort of conflict over this issue IRL, but I have a burning question for all of you who always wear your shoes indoors:  Are your floors always covered in water, mud, sand, pine needles, and gravel?!?!?  My house would be a horrible mess after one day if we wore shoes inside.  On any given day, there is a 70% chance that the ground right outside every door of my house has either snow, slush, water, road salt, mud, gravel, pine needles, dog poo, or a mixture of some/all of the above.  I cannot fathom cleaning that up every day.  Nor can I imagine how uncomfortable it would be for kids to play on the floors or for someone who chooses to go barefoot.  I could see it in an apartment or somewhere where it is always dry and warm, but not in any locations I have ever lived.  I do not know anyone IRL that wears shoes indoors so it is never a real discussion, but every time this topic comes up, I so want to ask!

Most of my family likes to be barefoot in the house, but we wear shoes indoors as well.  I never ask people to take their shoes off.  Between four kids, two cats, and a dog my floors get dirty with hair, food, etc.  It's visible in the main rooms because the floors are wood.  I vacuum those rooms every day.

[Melissa in Australia]

Going to someone's house tonight and I'm not sure they are a shoes-off house or not.  I think it is fine, of course, for people to request no shoes in the house. But as a guest I have a dilemma.

 

I really despise going about barefoot.  I don't like bare feet in my house either.  I think bare feet can be worse than shoes (not always, but there are warts, infections, etc). Of course if a guest comes over and takes off shoes and has no socks on, I don't scold them.  But ick. 

 

So, it's sandal weather and I was thinking of wearing a summer skirt and sandals.  Would you take socks to put on, which will look stupid with the skirt, or just wear black pants with black socks even though it looks too wintry for the weather?  Typically at home I wear white athletic socks but that will look too casual even with pants. 

 

Weird question, I know. But I can't be the only person who doesn't know what to wear on the feet in a shoes-off house. 

 

I personally know people who do carry socks to put on their feet.

 

 I have to wear my shoes in as I have special prosthesis to stop the agonizing pain in my feet. I cannot wear sandals, just ugly black lace up granny shoes whatever the temperature.

[Above The Rowan]

Lol. I have lived on the west coast, east coast, Midwest, and my mom is from Ontario so I visit there frequently. I have never known anyone who expected guests at a gathering to remove their shoes upon entering the home. Close friends and family yes, but it seems presumptuous in the home of an acquaintance.

 

For those who are concerned about their crawlers on the floor, do you let them play outside and crawl in the grass? I don't really see the difference...

And that's why I say it's not at all a regional culture thing. I have yet to be in a Cdn home that would have been ok with me waltzing in with my outdoor shoes on. But I have seen many others on this board from Canada say the opposite. Funny.

[katilac]

 

I did go to a church meeting where I walked in to a home I'd never been in before, and saw a ton of shoes in the mud room, so I took mine off and threw them into the pile...... then I realized that was just the family's shoe storage, and everyone else in the meeting was dressed formally and with shoes.  Including the host.  Whoops! I felt silly. But luckily I had on a lovely pair of wool socks, not my normal slightly-dingy whites, so it was all good.

 

:lol:

[skimomma]

That's what I was thinking............ people tend to heat higher, not lower than me............ and mine is around 68.

 

The average age of the housing in my area is very old and most houses are poorly insulated so heating is expensive.  Despite the climate, most people here are very active outdoors, whether for work or recreation.  When your indoor temperatures are lower, it is easier to acclimate outdoors.  That is my not-so-educated theory anyway.  We set our stat at 60 day and 50 night which we all find comfortable enough.  But we are also a casual community so most people wear hats indoors and even scarves, wrist warmers, etc....  Long johns are part of the daily clothing for 1/2 of the year.  I have more sets of long johns than I do shoes.

[skimomma]

Oh good. I'm not the only one who wondered about that. 

 

I'm so happy to live in a warm climate. I know many people don't like our summers or our bugs or they want four seasons. That's great if you like it, but I don't want to live some place where a boot porch is even necessary.

 

We are forecasted for 6-8 inches of new snow tomorrow.  I am starting to think the bugs and heat would be OK......

[Laura Corin]

The average age of the housing in my area is very old and most houses are poorly insulated so heating is expensive.  Despite the climate, most people here are very active outdoors, whether for work or recreation.  When your indoor temperatures are lower, it is easier to acclimate outdoors.  That is my not-so-educated theory anyway.  We set our stat at 60 day and 50 night which we all find comfortable enough.  But we are also a casual community so most people wear hats indoors and even scarves, wrist warmers, etc....  Long johns are part of the daily clothing for 1/2 of the year.  I have more sets of long johns than I do shoes.

 

I agree - whether when we lived with air conditioning in a hot climate or now living with heating in a cooler climate, we have not designed a big difference between inside and outside.  Our heating is set at between 13 and 15 degrees C.  Like you, I wear sweaters and long johns indoors.

 

L

[Lady Florida.]

 

 

A boot porch is the catch-all term for an enclosed porch.  Most people here have them.  Some are part of the actual house (that is the case with ours) while others are temporary plywood structures that people add to their main doors October-May.  They serve mainly as an air lock so that when you open the door you are not getting a direct blast of cold air into your living space.  But this is also where people put on and take off boots/shoes and cleats.  You usually store them there as well.  Ours is nice and big so we have seating to make putting boots on easier, a few hooks for really wet/snowy/muddy outwear, and I also keep our garbage/recycling bins, snow shovels, gaiters, snowshoes, and such out there.  We do not use any other doors during the winter (except in an emergency).  Very elaborate ones have closets, boot heaters, and other goodies.  

 

Thank you for explaining this. I now know what you're talking about. I've seen these in both New Jersey and Tennessee, but they didn't have a name. 

 

 We set our stat at 60 day and 50 night which we all find comfortable enough.  

 

Oh my! We turn the heat on when it gets down to 50 degrees. Cold here is a damp cold that goes right through you. I remember visiting dh's grandmother in Tennessee once in winter. It was 25 outside and it felt the same as 40 feels here. The humidity level makes a big difference.

 

I agree - whether when we lived with air conditioning in a hot climate or now living with heating in a cooler climate, we have not designed a big difference between inside and outside.  

 

I can take the heat outdoors in summer. If I couldn't, I'd never be able to weed my garden. However, wiithout A/C humidity can ruin or shorten the life of your indoor stuff. Wood furniture and cabinets get ruined. The bathroom would grow mold from the combination of outdoor humidity and shower moisture. I remember when A/C wasn't the norm and everyone put a few kernels of rice in their salt shaker to keep it from clumping. There is no breeze in summer, even at night unless you live on the beach. If we opened the windows the air would stagnate. 

[Laura Corin]

 

I can take the heat outdoors in summer. If I couldn't, I'd never be able to weed my garden. However, wiithout A/C humidity can ruin or shorten the life of your indoor stuff. Wood furniture and cabinets get ruined. The bathroom would grow mold from the combination of outdoor humidity and shower moisture. I remember when A/C wasn't the norm and everyone put a few kernels of rice in their salt shaker to keep it from clumping. There is no breeze in summer, even at night unless you live on the beach. If we opened the windows the air would stagnate. 

 

I understand - I lived in Hong Kong which is close to 100% humidity for most of the summer, with regular typhoons passing through and monsoon rains the rest of the time.  We used to run the air conditioning for the humidity, but just not keep it very cool.

 

Scotland is also not a dry place, so I also understand that temperatures in winter feel colder in humidity - 13 or 15 degrees C with good clothing does work though.  For reference, my normal indoor clothing in winter is camisole, turtle neck, fleece, possibly down vest, long johns, wool socks, slippers and lined jeans.

 

L