Blueridge Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 ...how would you recover your self respect when mingling with that crowd again? :crying: Whether giving a speech, teaching a class, playing a clarinet solo, something done with your whole heart and effort but falling very short of your goal, how would you process the embarrassment and move on? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in NH Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 I would be honest with the people in the group about my embarrassment. Acknowledge the performance did not meet your own expectations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 It really depends on my relationship to that crowd/audience and what exactly went wrong. More often than not, I've found that other people don't judge me as harshly as I judge myself. I have a tendency to blow my foibles out of proportion and think that something went much worse than it actually did. So for me, it's usually worked out better just to blow it off and move on - rather than trying to "fix things" by saying something. I've often said something after such an incident only to find that people had no clue what I was talking about. Again, it really depends on the variables of the situation. But if you're in doubt, and could go either way, I'd recommend just moving on as if nothing happened. ETA: and of course, process the "learning" from the situation so you can meet your standards and be happy with your performance next time. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Izzy Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 There's pretty much no chance I'd ever be performing in front of a crowd because I really am that shy. But if I think I said or did something embarrassing I might address it to that person. And then they usually tell me they have no idea what I'm talking about. I get a little self conscious sometimes. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blueridge Posted January 7, 2013 Author Share Posted January 7, 2013 Thank you. I am extremely self critical and very shy. I sang a solo for a church concert, tried my absolute best, but heard the recording...oh, so bad I would call it repulsive. I never want to do it again. Ever. Those poor sweet people. Such a complete failure. I pray time will help. Gosh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4kiddies Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 Thank you. I am extremely self critical and very shy. I sang a solo for a church concert, tried my absolute best, but heard the recording...oh, so bad I would call it repulsive. I never want to do it again. Ever. Those poor sweet people. Such a complete failure. I pray time will help. Gosh. I think that we as women tend to be hard on ourselves and it probably wasn't as bad as you think it was. Also, I'm sure that people saw that you put your heart and soul into it and can appreciate it. And, lets be honest, you got up and sang in front of a crowd-I'm sure the majority of them wouldn't have the guts to do it themselves so don't be so hard on yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 Uh . . . I could send you the video of my best friend and me singing a karaoke version of The Way We Were in front of a bunch of people at a scrapbooking weekend. I can guarantee that whatever you did could not possibly be as embarrassing as that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkle Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 :grouphug: Let me just say, that unless the people there were especially musical, they probably didn't even notice. My dh does a lot of music at church, and it's inevitable that every time he blows it (or thinks he does), those are the times people will come up afterward and compliment him for playing so well. :D Don't let it worry you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garddwr Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 Oh it's happened to me. LOL Let's just say...time heals. :closedeyes: This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 Now that you've shared the details of the situation, I can honestly say I wouldn't worry about it. :grouphug: First, recordings always seem to sound worse (or at least "feel" worse) than the original. I've been recorded both singing and speaking before, and it always sounds different to me (not usually in a positive way). Secondly, the people who heard you singing also got to experience your expression and emotion. You said you put your heart into it, and I'm sure they felt that. That's what people respond to more than the actual singing. Some people sing perfectly but without much feeling. Others may not sing perfectly but you can feel and connect to the meaning of the song because they put so much feeling into it. I'd rather listen to the latter singer any day. You did not have the benefit of seeing that piece of the performance when you listened to the recording of yourself. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LMD Posted January 8, 2013 Share Posted January 8, 2013 This is exactly why I don't sing in front of people anymore. I have crippling performance anxiety and can't stand to listen to myself recorded. Other people say that they didn't notice and enjoy it, but I'm cringing! I'm sure it wasn't as bad as you think, and in this case I wouldn't say anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blueridge Posted January 8, 2013 Author Share Posted January 8, 2013 Thank you all. I am trying not to think about it, and don't think I will mention it to anybody. So glad it's over lol! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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