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"But I don't want to forget English!"


Giraffe
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DD is 5. We have struggled for years to get her to speak Turkish (DH's native language). We are spending at least this school year and very likely next year living here in Turkey to promote language acquisition, among other reasons. She attends a private school here and is immersed in the language all day.

 

I met with her teachers the other day and they are concerned that while she is making progress, she is not advancing as fast as they would like language-wise and at this rate she will not be ready for first grade here. She is a smart cookie, intelligence and manipulation wise. She understands EVERYTHING people say to her in Turkish, but will pretend not to when it suits her. She will sometimes respond in Turkish, but usually in English.

 

She has expressed more than once a preference for Turkey over America and actually has friends here whereas in the US she has none.

 

I've been trying to get to the root of the problem while we are on holiday for the New Year's weekend. She said she's afraid she will forget English. She's mentioned this before and while it seems absolutely ridiculous to me, I think I may in fact be the problem. She has TONS of bilingual (and tri/quad) examples around her, but she is convinced.

 

Advice? Please?

 

 

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She has TONS of bilingual (and tri/quad) examples around her, but she is convinced.

 

Are the bilingual examples around her age or adults?

Also it is common for children to pretend not to understand any language when it suits them. Maybe set up an "english hour" when you and your daughter can read english books or watch english cartoons?

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She may be genuinely concerned about forgeting her English since she is obviously immersed in the language by living there and going to a local school. Are you afterschooling her in English or are you focusing in her Turkish studies and leaving English aside for the time being? If you are formally afterschooling in English I would discuss with her how this will help her not to forget the language. I would remind her about whatever plans you have to make sure this doesn't happen, like spending the summers in the US, having English speaking playgroups etc.

 

Having said that, it might also be a diversion tactic. Is she a perfectionist? She might have high expectations for herself and she may feel she is not living up to them. If she is feeling she is not able to speak Turkish as well as she would expect by now, may be this is a way of protecting her self image? Just some thoughts to ponder. Kids are tricky....

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Sorry I didn't come back to this sooner - we were out of town and internet was sketchy.

 

All (well, all I can come up with) of her examples are adults. The kids are still learning.

 

She is inundated with English. I speak English to her, the TV is mostly in English (though I recently switched her cartoons back to Turkish), I read to her in English, we have British friends she plays with. If anything, I think she needs more Turkish, not English.

 

I think she is a perfectionist. She wants to do things right. That being said, she is coming out more Turkish-wise and speaking with family and friends more. Perhaps it's just coming slowly, but for crying out loud we have been here (this time) for 8 months! Her first words were Turkish and we are here every summer. Everyone expected her to acquire the language much faster than this.

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Sorry I didn't come back to this sooner - we were out of town and internet was sketchy.

 

All (well, all I can come up with) of her examples are adults. The kids are still learning.

 

She is inundated with English. I speak English to her, the TV is mostly in English (though I recently switched her cartoons back to Turkish), I read to her in English, we have British friends she plays with. If anything, I think she needs more Turkish, not English.

 

I think she is a perfectionist. She wants to do things right. That being said, she is coming out more Turkish-wise and speaking with family and friends more. Perhaps it's just coming slowly, but for crying out loud we have been here (this time) for 8 months! Her first words were Turkish and we are here every summer. Everyone expected her to acquire the language much faster than this.

 

I'm not very knowledgable, so take this with a grain of salt... but is she in situations where she has to speak Turkish because nobody speaks English and she wants or needs to interact? If perfectionism is the problem, then she might have to be in that sort of situation to make progress.

 

Nan

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I'm not very knowledgable, so take this with a grain of salt... but is she in situations where she has to speak Turkish because nobody speaks English and she wants or needs to interact? If perfectionism is the problem, then she might have to be in that sort of situation to make progress.

 

Nan

 

This is exactly why we made the decision that DD and I would stay in Turkey this year and DD would attend school here. When she's with me she defaults to English (naturally) and she wasn't getting enough exposure to kids and situations where she HAD to speak Turkish. It's made worlds of difference, but still she's got this block.

 

Maybe I'm over thinking it, but I am concerned that she won't be ready for first grade in the fall. The rigor ramps up significantly and the teachers will not hold her hand like they do in K. She has to be conversant by Fall.

 

Yes, we could just go back to the States and give up, but our long term plan is to live here, and to do that she has to be speaking Turkish in order to attend school.

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