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What do you do when there's NOTHING to spend on Christmas?


Jenny in GA
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Dh and I have more money to spend on gifts than we've ever had before. We both grew up poor, so it was fun to buy gifts for awhile. I still like buying gifts. I enjoy giving gifts. But after awhile, it is just more stuff. Christmas has been so stressful for the past 7 years because we visit family over Christmas. I decorate, shop, and then ... what? We open gifts before we go and leave them, or take them along which is a pain, or a combination of both. I feel like December is wasted because we don't take the time to really celebrate Christmas. This year we are going to do things differently. We are going to spend the month leading up to Christmas actually celebrating it - we'll bake cookies and go caroling, we'll find a service project, we'll memorize the rest of Luke 2: 1-20. We'll even put together a Christmas program for my parents and IL's. Starting Christmas Day we'll give gifts for 12 days. One day the kids will each get an audio book and we'll listen to one of them. Another day they'll all get new sleds and we'll go sledding. Another day they'll each get a new winter hat (probably the day before they get the sled :) ). Another day they'll each get 1 or more books. Other days we'll get movies and boardgames. I know we'll use all the things and I enjoy getting them for the kids, but it is too much. Next year, I'm going to plan better. My kids like the stuff we give them, but I know we had just as happy times when I was a kid and I was lucky to get a very used bike. Like you, we spend lots of good quality time with the kids, but I want to make it more of a focus.

 

We are doing something like this as well. I am trying to get all my shopping done before 12/1. Then, every day of December we'll celebrate the season in some way...so we can all enjoy it. Some days we'll just read a seasonal book or watch a movie. There is free ice skating nearby so we'll do that, as well as attending some free Christmas concerts. We'll go caroling at a rehab facility, see a local library's gingerbread house display, make crafty gifts and/or do baking, etc. For the first year in a while I'm actually looking forward to December!!

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Our last 2 1/2 years have been so rough, so I completely understand what you are going through. We decided to use our financial woes as a time to establish some Christmas traditions in our house.

 

1. Advent Calendar: a small cookie or candy, or a note of encouragement

2. Best Sugar Cookie Decorator: we have a contest to see who creates the best Christmas themed sugar cookie

3. Christmas Tree: if you have no tree, wait until Christmas Eve. Lots will basically be giving these away. Our kids loved waking up to a Christmas tree fully decorated by Santa.

4. We each pick a Christmas movie to watch leading into Christmas day. (popcorn, homemade treats)

 

 

Everyone else has pretty much said it already. When I watched the movie "Running on Empty" I loved the idea that a gift cannot be something that is store bought. It has to be something you found or made. Take your kids on a walk or hike, let their imaginations run wild.

 

Finally, there is always an organization that is willing to help. There are also those of us on the boards that probably have excess sitting around the house to donate.

 

Keep us posted!

 

***I should also add that we have decided to abide by the gift-giving strategy from one of the wise advice givers on this board: Something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read.

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We are not this bad off but things are tight and I grew up in a house where that was the norm. And this is the problem I see with SANTA and nobody truly understands unless they have been there. Your post makes me so happy I never taught my dd about Santa and completely fit my reason for not doing so. SANTA is NOT REAL. We have never taught our child about Santa for this exact purpose. Not all kids get equally. That doesn't mean they were bad and it doesn't mean anything other then some parents don't spoil their children. I would sit down with them and tell them that there is no such thing as Santa if they don't already know. It is better then them feeling like they did something wrong all year.

 

Having your kid not be expecting a ton of stuff has nothing to do with Santa. He was real, St. Nicholas, Bishop of Myrna, and has a beautiful , generous story of giving his fortune away to those in need. His story has morphed, but it is no less real.

 

My kids love St. Nick, love Santa, and don't expect to have their every wish fulfilled on Christmas because they know it's NOT ABOUT THE GIFTS.

 

Here's my pinterst board on inexpensive Christmas stuff to do.

 

Here's my Magic Childhood board with fun ideas-many are free.

 

Experience over stuff.

 

Another great idea--hit the Thrift Store, get some movies, and make a movie basket. Popcorn, pretzels and some kisses, melt the kisses with the pretzels, set up a fort and watch the movies in the fort.

 

Here's a link to a pinterest Paper Doll search. Print some out, get a paper kraft box at the craft store, paint it up (stripes, squiggles, make it fun and an heirloom-not something throwaway), cut out the paper dolls (or let the kid cut them out). Don't underestimate the allure of paper dolls.

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I haven't read all of the replies, so apologies if this has already been mentioned. Depending on what area you live in, there may be a local MOMS Club. Since they are non-profit, they always need to do charity projects, fundraisers, etc. Many of those moms are trying to clean out their own kids' toys before Christmas. You can call them or write to them and they would probably love to give you many gently used toys!! If there is none in your town, try a different town close to you.

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Hi, it's the OP checking back in. WOW, this has turned out to be an amazing thread! Thanks for everything that was said. I especially like all the ideas of activities. We already have a tradition of baking cookies and then driving through the neighborhoods looking at lights on Christmas Eve while eating some of them. I think we will just beef up things like that this year. I have really great kids; they find a lot of pleasure in simple things like that.

 

I received a lot of personal replies and will be replying to them shortly; thanks for being patient.

 

It makes me feel good to think this thread might have helped several other families.

 

Thanks again,

OP

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You could take the $25 dollars and purchase what you need to make sandwiches and hot chocolate. Then take the children and give the sandwiches out to the homeless. Even if you only give sandwiches and hot chocolate to five homeless your children will have great experience. Just a thought.

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Honestly, I would probably go to Dollar Tree and pick up some small gifts. A lot of their stuff is junk, but they do have nice books and coloring books (all sorts of the same ones that are $4-5 each at Walmart for $1 each) puzzles, balls, little Disney figures, craft kits, bubble baths, bath mitts, flashlights, batteries, bungee cords, small tools, hair accessories for girls, etc.

 

In addition, get $1 roll of wrap to wrap their gifts, and a box of chocolates and candy canes, which you could split between them.

 

They could each get 3–4 small gifts to unwrap, and a little candy.

 

That's what I would do.

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Honestly, I would probably go to Dollar Tree and pick up some small gifts. A lot of their stuff is junk, but they do have nice books and coloring books (all sorts of the same ones that are $4-5 each at Walmart for $1 each) puzzles, balls, little Disney figures, craft kits, bubble baths, bath mitts, flashlights, batteries, bungee cords, small tools, hair accessories for girls, etc.

 

In addition, get $1 roll of wrap to wrap their gifts, and a box of chocolates and candy canes, which you could split between them.

 

They could each get 3–4 small gifts to unwrap, and a little candy.

 

That's what I would do.

 

 

I've been thinking about this since the thread started yesterday, and I've about come around to this same place, with a few adaptations.

 

1. I would still go through every bit of crafting supplies I had in my house and try hard to come up with a few simple projects to make and put under the tree.

2. I think the folks who suggested coupons for things like staying up an hour or two late on a Friday night or baking cookies with Mom or getting to choose the DVD one night are onto something. Every one of those coupons could be wrapped up separately, and most of them wouldn't actually cost you anything more than the bit of paper you write or print them on.

3. I love the idea someone else tossed out about giving a game for the family to play as a gift. So, I think I'd devote a chunk of the budget to that, looking at sales flyers and discount stores to get the best possible price (Target has Monopoly for $9 at the moment, Yahtzee for $8, Sorry for $10.), then spend the remainder very carefully at the dollar store.

 

If you spent $10 on a game, $3 on candy and bought four dollar store items for each kiddo, then added a few coupons, that would allow for a Christmas day that included a few small things for each kid to open, some edible treats for all of them and a few rounds of a game for the whole family.

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(((HUGS))) to all struggling. I remember reading an article years ago about a family who had no money for Christmas and they decided to give each other service as gifts. If I recall, they drew names, and spent the weeks leading up to Christmas performing "secret" acts of service for that person--doing their chores before they could get to them, leaving kind notes, etc., and then on Christmas morning they revealed who had who. I wish I could find the actual story, because I always thought it was such a beautiful concept and so in keeping with the idea of Christmas and what Christ would want for His birthday.

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This thread had me dig out my fabric stash, and today I started handsewing a pillowcase. I am handsewing because I have very little time to actually sew and by the time I set up my machine my time will be over daily. Plus I can bring it with me to the kids activities and bible study to work on. I also called my sister, I have a nice sheer fabric and bias tape to make a wrap skirt for dd for dance class so this weekend sister is going to roll hem the bottom with her serger. So that is 2 gifts for free out of fabric I forgot I owned down in the rubbermaids in my basement. I am no seamstress, I can barely do a straightline with my machine but I can make these.

 

I also decided that for my nephew and dd5 I can make homemade playdough and take some cookie cutters out of my holiday baking stash and give those. and the same with homemade fingerpaint, put in babyfood jars. That just leaves the boys. I don't feel as freaked out now. I know my ex will pull a big "I'm better than your mom because I bought xyz" but my kids are smart they see it for the ploy it is with him.

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There are charities and organizations. You do what you have to do. Been there, done that, and going through it again.

:iagree:

This year, we're signed up with a local charity for Christmas and food pantry. Everyone is getting hit hard. Last Christmas was worse for us, but we made do and focused on family traditions instead of gifts. I like the idea of serving those during the holidays -- even if one is going thru tough $$ times. Hope this helps! We'll get thru this. :grouphug:

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I grew up this way -- mom always managed to come up with ways to make Christmas special that had nothing to do with gifts, and I don't think any of us felt deprived, even the years when my dad was gone (military), or we were basically homeless (military -- we almost always PCSed late in the year).

 

We'd go walk around light displays, join in caroling at local nursing homes. Sometimes we'd join them for crafts and baking. We also did the sing-alongs at local churches.

 

Gifts were usually homemade, and then we'd usually get a clothing item and a couple of books, all from the thrift store. Often, there would be a coupon book for things like staying up late, getting out of a chore, getting to pick dinner or a (free) family outing, etc.

 

For Christmas dinner, we'd either eat on the ship (dad was in the Navy, and often had duty Christmas Day), or we'd work at a soup kitchen -- either way, we got a nice, free meal out of it, too, but at the time we mostly saw it as giving service.

 

A $25 budget can stretch a long way with some creativity. We really didn't feel as poor as we were.

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I agree that charities and other organizations might be able to help. Also, the last time I was at a thrift store they had a lot of toys, some which were still in the box! (And selling for just a dollar or two.) Maybe get ahold of a local church to help?

 

I don't know the ages of your kids -- maybe you mentioned in a later post. We went through a Christmas like that about 8 or 9 years ago. We had nothing to give each other. Our kids scraped together their own money to buy a little Christmas tree!

 

I wanted to make it special. I tried to make a point of not complaining in front of them. We played Christmas music all the time, made fun artsy Christmas craft projects to hang up out of old magazines, things like that. I made a soup that to this day we call "Poor Soup" (just a big pot of beans with anything else I could find in the kitchen to put in it...) Our kids were old enough that we could explain to them that Daddy didn't have a paycheck that Christmas, and things would be a little different, but we'd still have fun. We told the kids they had to each think of something to "do" for Christmas instead of buying a gift. So, for example, one daughter learned a special Christmas song on her violin to play for us on Christmas Eve.

 

Funny thing, my kids bring up that Christmas fondly, as a real special one.

 

Your children might be quite a bit younger, in which case I'd probably focus more on getting cheap toys at a thrift store, especially if they believe in Santa Claus.

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THis is my kids too. They don't care if something is used, as long as they can still enjoy it.

 

One year (when they were younger) I scored big time on some nice lego sets at a yard sale. It was a huge lego Christmas for a song, but they didn't care.

 

Last year we wanted to get sleds, but couldn't find them (sold out) anywhere! I just found some at a yard sale (the same ones we were looking at for $39) and I got two of them for $7 barely used.

 

UNFORTUNATELY, the kids were with me when I found them or they would be going under the tree.

 

Dawn

 

My kids like the stuff we give them, but I know we had just as happy times when I was a kid and I was lucky to get a very used bike. Like you, we spend lots of good quality time with the kids, but I want to make it more of a focus.

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OP, you have so many wonderful ideas already in this thread, but here are a few that came to mind when I was reading this.

 

1) Free Little Library: See if you have any in your area and scope out a few books for your kids. Normally, it's a leave one, get one honor system, but I can't imagine anyone begrudging a family a few books for Christmas gifts even if you don't have any to leave in their place. You could always take a few to replace them with later on if you feel the urge to do so.

 

2) Probably best for your youngest: gather up all the broken bits of crayon you can find and make new swirly crayons in fun shapes. You can google how to do this if you don't already know, and if you don't have any fun molds, ask your friends if they have some you could borrow. Pair with a $ store coloring book.

 

3) "Write/Illustrate Your Own Book" Kits - $ store blank journals, new pen or pencil from a $ store multipack split among the three, maybe split a set of $ store colored pencils or markers among the kids for illustrations. They could always swap colors if they need more than what they received.

 

4) Do you have mason jars, glitter, and small toys that somehow have lost their homes/family members/original set, etc? If so, divide and package these items up for each child and market it as a make your own snow-globe kit. If the kids want their "scenes" to remain stationary, you'd need a glue gun. Otherwise, they could be free-falling.

 

5) a small and prettily packaged box of salt dough ornaments you specially shape and paint for each child based on his or her current passion(s) - date the backs and talk up how they can hang them every year and hang on their own trees when they grow up

 

These next two were taken from a friend who needed homemade/inexpensive gifts for her kids a couple of years ago:

 

6) bottle pop lids - paint something the kids will love on the inside and protect with mod podge or similar. Turn into necklaces, hair items, or magnets. This assumes you have most items needed already around the house (old business or store magnets you might have around the house can be cut up and reused to make a pop bottle lid magnet set).

 

7) autographed pics of kids' favorite movie or tv personality - she would write to the celebrity and receive the pics for free - not sure of all the details since we aren't too celebrity crazy here, but her kids loved them

 

Another idea the whole family could do:

 

8) Have each person either make something from stuff they already have or choose an item from something they have that they think someone in the family would love and regift to that person. This might work out best if names are drawn.

 

I hope your Christmas ends up being so much more special and wonderful than you ever imagined it could be. Sending you lots and lots of hugs!

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I asked on my FB about a month ago, if anyone would decorate for Christmas if they had no money for gifts.

 

I was feeling depressed at the moment and really could not fathom buying anything much for our 8 children for Christmas.

 

On top of that : Birthdays: 2 sons will be 3 and 5 on December 22nd, and our daughter will be 13 on the 28th.

Mine and my twin sister's is the 21st and there are several more nieces, nephews, SIL, and another sister born in December.

 

I know we have all year to plan. But it seems to sneak up, and I hate buying gifts ahead of time and trying to hide them!

 

We have alot of medical debt this year that was life saving and unavoidable.

 

I am trying to think of better ways too to have family time, and make cookies, etc.

 

Our basement flooded when we got a new tub, so dh and ds cleaned it out finally and paid $55 to dump it.

 

I am still finding out that some clothes,toys,movies and books are ruined :(

 

Even in boxes some molded :(

 

I am trying to let it all go and recover with grace. Counting my daily blessings.

 

I did find a flyer for Toys for Tots and I plan to mail it in and see what happens!

 

I also have a FB local page for Free items that I have been blessed to give and receive FREE items including some clothes and toys.

 

dh is delivering a very nice stove to a poor family tonight.

 

That is essential to my Christmas: Giving to people even needier than ourselves even when we have debt.

 

I believe God will bless us if we do give for His Glory and not our own.

 

My baby girl ( 5 months now ) makes us all smile and feel blessed everyday! I know our kids would be ok if they knew we just could not afford anything, and we have had rough years when I only bought 1 item per child at a thrift store.

 

Last year after my surgery and roughest pregnancy, I decided to just draw names so we get a person in our home to buy or make a gift for and pray for.

 

We drew names again this year and have $25 per person to spend. This is my estimate. I am not worried about the baby ( she will be happy no matter what she gets)

 

My 2 year old asked me for a dinosaur and the next day I found a great deal on one from a local lady. I met her and she knocked $10 off without me asking!

I thanked God for that, and now he will be happy and I will be having a dinosaur party for our 2 boys who share a birthday. I got another dinosaur free that just rolls, but also found some $1 dinosaour train toys at our local Teacher's Aid this summer.

 

I am trying to sell books to pay for food and some more gifts.

 

DH is upset that the policy at work has changed and he no longer gets his vacation pay even if he cannot take a vacation. That was always our Christmas money, for food, travel, gifts, and higher bills.

 

I think we will also be helping our oldest 2 earn some $$ to help the family their Youth group is helping this year.

 

We also got the Shoebox ministry started in our church several years ago and enough donations were given that the Youth got to shop for the kids and fill some boxes.

 

So, I definitely think that no matter the situation, we should give to others and show that to our kids.

 

I have seen my children get so many toys at my mom and dad's house that we had to stuff our van to get it all.

Now that my dad has passed away due to cancer, my mom has alot less to spend and has her own business.

 

She shocked me the other day and kept our little ones while giving me some $$ to buy her some gifts for our kiddo's! How I wish I had had time to shop online, but I made the best of the situation and found a V tech Reader for my struggling reader. It was on clearance and is supposed to hav 6 free downloadable books to put on it. I found some other sturdy toys that will get on her nerves! All the noises, but they were cheap. So, she was happy and that made me happy. She still has 2 of our kids to buy for but will probably give them $$ ( I hope). I can't buy what they are wanting.

 

I got another gift that I was going to return and traded her some ornaments for it! It can seem crazy, and watching shows like the Grinch, Miracle on 34th street, It's A Wonderful Life, etc.... those help me get perspective. Friends and family are more important than any gift.

 

And I cannot forget that dh let me spend the $$ from the pool that we thought we wouldn't get on gifts, food, and gas!

 

I still have a few things to buy and will have to pray and wait. I hope Toys for Tots will accept us. I have no idea what the criteria is, but have the application so I will see.

I am hoping they will help us replenish some board games, and building toys?

Anything would be appreciated.

 

My son has the drum on his head right now that I got for $2.50 with instruments in it. I saw it at Target last year for $25!!

Still, something in my gut yearns to see every child get a gift to remind them of the Greatest gift of all: JESUS!

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