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Horrible tragedy. Would you tell your child?


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#1 Rivka

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 06:38 AM

Every year my family goes to a one-week intergenerational church camp. We've made wonderful friends there whom we see every year, and sometimes we have contact with them in between. This past year, my 7yo became friends with an 8yo girl who was there for the first time.

Yesterday, that little girl's 5 or 6-year-old brother died in his sleep.

I am so horrified. Devastated. I can't imagine what that family is going through. I know their whole community is reeling, and so is much of our camp community.

I don't know whether I should tell my 7yo. I can't imagine telling her, and how scared it would make her. And yet, if this family comes back to camp next year, my 7yo would need to know what they had been through and why the little brother wasn't with them. And yet, if they don't come back, she would never need to know.

I can't imagine telling her. I'm still so shocked and upset. What would you do?

#2 stripe

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 06:54 AM

I would. A few years ago, a man I knew dropped dead of a heart attack while playing soccer. All the kids who were friends with his kids were at a minimum, told what had happened and were therefore expected to be extra loving to the kids, especially the older girl, who was about 7 or 8. I think it helped his children that other kids knews. I have told my kids when people they know have died. They have also attended funerals, as well as visited a cemetary multiple times to visit the grave of a friend of my husband's whom they knew. We haven't had too many family tragedies, mostly sickness and accidents, but we did have a baby who died during delivery.

I think it is horribly difficult, but probably important for her to comprehend that people don't just always die when they are ancient. I think, if she is friends with the girl, it would be nice if you could help your daughter reach out to her. I don't know ultimately if it does make a lot of difference why someone dies, in terms of what the effect is on how other kids perceive it. I might suggest (not to mislead but because ultimately it must be true) that he was somehow sick but no one knew. I think the idea of suddenly dying without warning might be the scariest part. But I am not sure.

:grouphug:

#3 elegantlion

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:11 AM

I am so sorry for their loss, your community's loss. :grouphug:

Yes, I would tell her. However, you don't have to tell her how he died. I would speak in general terms, she'll see that you're upset and pick up on that probably anyway.

:grouphug::grouphug:

We've always shared about death with ds. I can't hide the emotion anyway and I think it's okay for our kids to know we're sad and grieving.

#4 momma2three

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:13 AM

I would tell her, but I think that I would tell her that you don't know the specifics. I think it would be really traumatic to an 8 year old to hear that a child around her age just went to sleep and didn't wake up.

#5 WoolySocks

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:19 AM

I would tell her, but I think that I would tell her that you don't know the specifics. I think it would be really traumatic to an 8 year old to hear that a child around her age just went to sleep and didn't wake up.


:iagree: If you think it would be hard for you to tell her right now because of your own emotions and shock, I think it would be ok to wait a bit if you don't think she'll hear about it elsewhere. :grouphug: I'm so sorry. This is so incredibly sad. :crying:

#6 marbel

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:23 AM

Yes, I agree - tell her and leave out the details.

Is there any place other than your camp where she may see the girl? You might wait till it's closer to the camp if so. Something like "you may see Lily at camp this year. She might be sad because her little brother died." And then take it from there.

#7 Chris in VA

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:25 AM

So sorry for your loss.

If you don't see them except during the camping, I might wait until she's older. I do think death is part of life, iykwim, so I'm kinda surprised I feel this way!

Alternatively, I might wait until they know more about the reason he died (if they are finding out now), and then share. I don't think I'd say he died in his sleep--I could see all kinds of sleep fears coming from that.

:grouphug:

#8 jelbe5

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:35 AM

I would tell her - death is part of life. Has she lost another loved one or a pet? Or is this her fist experience with death?

I would not tell her the boy died in his sleep. Just that he died and you are not sure about the circumstances.

:grouphug: So sorry for your loss.

#9 Country Mouse

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:39 AM

:grouphug:
I'm so sorry.

I agree with the others who have said to tell her, but not that he died in his sleep.

#10 dwkilburn1

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:48 AM

So sorry for such a tragic loss in you circle of friends, and it will be difficult to talk to the kids for sure. I would tell her, but I might wait until I knew why exactly he died. The death of a child will result in an autopsy most of the time to rule out foul play (awful to think about but the authorities never know you know?). Will there be any way for you to find out the cause in a few weeks?

#11 Parrothead

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 08:00 AM

I think perhaps she should know. But I'd not tell the details if your dd has anxiety issues.

#12 Starr

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 08:21 AM

She will ask you how and why so I would wait until I hopefully could answer the how part. :grouphug: Be ready to make her friend a card or send flowers or something tangible she can do with you.

#13 klmama

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 08:24 AM

With a child that young I think you should wait a bit to tell until YOU have processed it better. In the meantime, you may find out why he died. Obviously, there was a cause other than just going to sleep! If she asks and you still don't know why he died, just tell her so.

#14 MBM

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 09:13 AM

I would tell my child, but I would make sure she understood that for a child that age to die in his sleep is extremely unusual.

#15 SparklyUnicorn

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 09:22 AM

You might be surprised and she might take it better than you imagine. I've had to tell my kids about deaths and they usually don't react much at all.

#16 besroma

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 09:23 AM

I would tell her, but I think that I would tell her that you don't know the specifics. I think it would be really traumatic to an 8 year old to hear that a child around her age just went to sleep and didn't wake up.


:iagree: This is what I would do.

I am so sorry. That is incredibly sad.

#17 In the Rain

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 09:53 AM

I would tell her, but I think that I would tell her that you don't know the specifics. I think it would be really traumatic to an 8 year old to hear that a child around her age just went to sleep and didn't wake up.


:iagree:

#18 abbeyej

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:16 AM

I would tell, but I would not frame it as "died unexpectedly in his sleep" -- that could just be too terrifying for many, many kids. I would explain that it was a horrible tragedy and he had died, and we didn't know the details yet. I might speculate that something might have been wrong with his heart, and that perhaps we'll find out later, but mostly I would focus on modeling a reasonable response to the grieving process rather than the details of what happened.

How horribly sad for that family. Just so utterly awful. :(

#19 justLisa

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:18 AM

That is just awful, I am sorry for the loss in your community.

It may be hard not to say anything. Even if they don't go someone is bound to say something about it.

#20 NorthwestMom

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:37 AM

I disagree with most of you.

If the only place you might see this family is at camp, and they might not return next year, then I would not tell her unless I was certain they were going to see each other. Your dd has only spent time with this family for one week in the past - it's not like they have an established, ongoing relationship. I would not provoke the trauma, grief, and fear this is sure to cause over an acquaintance. You dd is very young. I would only tell her if it was a certainty she would find out in another way if I did not.

#21 Heigh Ho

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:39 AM

I would tell her as a part of involving her in whatever your family plans on doing to support the other family. Send flowers, a card, attend memorial?
My sons had a close friend that passed unexpectedly & the best thing for them was attending the memorial. The priest's words were appropriate for the friends and gave them much comfort. In the months that followed, they had questions about the medical care during the passing, as well as if lack of good medical care during life had caused the death.

#22 Cassy

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:39 AM

I would tell her, but not immediately. It was only relatively recently that she saw them all, so she'll have very clear, vivid memories of them. Also, I'd wait until I'd come to terms with it a little better myself, so that I could support her properly.

I agree that death is a natural thing. My father died of a stroke when I was 8 yo, and I was hugging him as he died. A number of close relatives died in the few years that followed. I still always find the death of someone young horrible, shocking, disturbing. At some point she needs to know, but maybe not now.

#23 *Michelle*

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:42 AM

I'm so sorry for your community's loss. If it were me, I would definitely tell my children. Whether or not I would get specific would depend on the child. We've had to be very open with our oldest about death, but he doesn't see it as something to be afraid of. We've even talked about death as a kind of falling asleep and waking up in Heaven, mainly because he asked about the line in his prayers that says, "if I die before I wake..." Like many things, I think children will take their cues from their parents.

#24 mytwomonkeys

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:44 AM

i would save the talk for when you need it. next year before you attend camp you can talk to her then. that gives her a little more time to mature. it gives you more time to pray and reflect on the right words to share it. :grouphug:i'm so sorry that happened. it breaks my heart to read.

#25 farrarwilliams

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 11:36 AM

I am usually very up front and honest with my kids about death. But this is a case where I might not say anything. It's so out of the blue, so unusual, and not a family that she'll see again soon or possibly ever. I just think that unlike a death caused by an accident or a long term illness, this might be hard to put into a context that isn't just plain scary.

If I did say something, I think it would be in context of sending a sympathy card or something along those lines.

#26 Word Nerd

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 11:39 AM

I'm not sure how I would handle it, but I don't see how withholding the fact that the child died in his sleep would be perceived as less scary.

Edited by WordGirl, 07 October 2012 - 11:42 AM.


#27 farrarwilliams

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 11:44 AM

I'm not sure how I would handle it, but I don't see how withholding the fact that the child died in his sleep would be perceived as less scary.


I think it's easier to understand when there's been a specific cause of death, which they don't know yet in this case, it sounds like. Also, that the idea that you could go to bed seemingly perfectly healthy and young and never wake up is scary even to me as an adult.

#28 Crimson Wife

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 11:45 AM

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:
I would tell your kids, but say that the doctors are trying to figure out what happened (which is presumably the case). I would also offer to let your kids draw a picture or make a craft to send with your sympathy card.

#29 justamouse

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 12:04 PM

Wow, how tragic! That poor family and your community!

In all honesty, I don't think I would tell her HOW, because I know my 6 YO would be terrified to close her eyes at that point. I would share that the child passed, because the alternative that they get surprised isn't fair, but I would say something like they had a health problem that no one knew about.

#30 swellmomma

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 12:34 PM

I would. This summer one of my little beaver scout's baby brother was killed when his mother backed over him. Because I knew if we returned to scouting we would see this family I told the kids.

Growing up my cousin went to a sleep over at a friend's house during summer vacation. They slept in the tent in the backyard. The friend died of a heartattack in his sleep, and my cousin was the one to wake up and find the body. He was freaked out to say the least (the friend had a heart defect but no one predeicted this). I know that kids that knew this boy, from classmates, to neighborhood playmates etc were all informed of his death. I do believe they waited until cause of death was determined to prevent kids from being scared to fall asleep. I know my cousin was terrified to sleep incase he didn't wake up. Once cause of death was determined parents could say his heart was broken and couldn't work right anymore etc. And assure their kids that they were safe to fall asleep at night.

I am sorry to hear about your friends and their loss.

#31 Crimson Wife

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 12:56 PM

I would say something like they had a health problem that no one knew about.


I wouldn't say that because that might make the child worry he/she might have one, too.

#32 Spy Car

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 01:12 PM

Every year my family goes to a one-week intergenerational church camp. We've made wonderful friends there whom we see every year, and sometimes we have contact with them in between. This past year, my 7yo became friends with an 8yo girl who was there for the first time.

Yesterday, that little girl's 5 or 6-year-old brother died in his sleep.

I am so horrified. Devastated. I can't imagine what that family is going through. I know their whole community is reeling, and so is much of our camp community.

I don't know whether I should tell my 7yo. I can't imagine telling her, and how scared it would make her. And yet, if this family comes back to camp next year, my 7yo would need to know what they had been through and why the little brother wasn't with them. And yet, if they don't come back, she would never need to know.

I can't imagine telling her. I'm still so shocked and upset. What would you do?


:grouphug: I'm sorry.

With my child I would tell him. But he is the sort who seems to handle things best when he has the full truth. You know your child best.

Warm wishes and condolences Rivka.

Bill

#33 momto2Cs

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 02:20 PM

I would. A few years ago, a man I knew dropped dead of a heart attack while playing soccer. All the kids who were friends with his kids were at a minimum, told what had happened and were therefore expected to be extra loving to the kids, especially the older girl, who was about 7 or 8. I think it helped his children that other kids knews. I have told my kids when people they know have died. They have also attended funerals, as well as visited a cemetary multiple times to visit the grave of a friend of my husband's whom they knew. We haven't had too many family tragedies, mostly sickness and accidents, but we did have a baby who died during delivery.

I think it is horribly difficult, but probably important for her to comprehend that people don't just always die when they are ancient. I think, if she is friends with the girl, it would be nice if you could help your daughter reach out to her. I don't know ultimately if it does make a lot of difference why someone dies, in terms of what the effect is on how other kids perceive it. I might suggest (not to mislead but because ultimately it must be true) that he was somehow sick but no one knew. I think the idea of suddenly dying without warning might be the scariest part. But I am not sure.

:grouphug:



:iagree: and :grouphug:

#34 tex-mex

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 02:22 PM

I would tell her - death is part of life. Has she lost another loved one or a pet? Or is this her fist experience with death?

I would not tell her the boy died in his sleep. Just that he died and you are not sure about the circumstances.

:grouphug: So sorry for your loss.

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

#35 athomemom

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 02:26 PM

:iagree: If you think it would be hard for you to tell her right now because of your own emotions and shock, I think it would be ok to wait a bit if you don't think she'll hear about it elsewhere. :grouphug: I'm so sorry. This is so incredibly sad. :crying:


:iagree:

#36 Georgiana D

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 02:39 PM

So sorry! I can't even imagine what their family is going through right now. Yes, I'd tell my child but only in the most generic terms. Nothing about the sleep part.

#37 Truscifi

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 02:55 PM

I would tell my ds. I would try to keep it general but would answer specific questions if he asked them, which he probably would.

I'm sorry for you and yours that you are having to deal with this, and for the family that lost their son. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

#38 Rivka

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 06:48 PM

Thanks for the support, everyone.

It helps to realize that I don't need to make a decision immediately. I can wait, and maybe talk to some of the other parents whose kids played with this family, and see if any information is made publicly available about the cause of death.

As many of you said, I am particularly reluctant to put the idea into her head that children can go to bed healthy and abruptly die without warning. I don't know if that will turn out to have been the case or not, and honestly, I am not close enough to the mother that I can be sure that I will ever know what happened. The little boy was adopted from Ethiopia, and I wonder if there might have been underlying health problems that the family was aware of.

I think that ultimately she probably needs to know. Even if this poor family never returns to camp, I'm sure there will be other children there who know what happened. I'd rather she learned it from us than from them. She is a very, very sensitive kid who still really struggles with the death of my FIL a year and a half ago even though she hadn't had a lot of contact with him due to illness and distance.

I just can't imagine how that little boy's mom will get through this, or what Alex's friend is going through right now. It is just awful to contemplate. I do know that her church community seems to be rallying round (they live several hours away) and I hope they will be a steady source of comfort.

#39 TranquilMind

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 06:58 PM

Every year my family goes to a one-week intergenerational church camp. We've made wonderful friends there whom we see every year, and sometimes we have contact with them in between. This past year, my 7yo became friends with an 8yo girl who was there for the first time.

Yesterday, that little girl's 5 or 6-year-old brother died in his sleep.

I am so horrified. Devastated. I can't imagine what that family is going through. I know their whole community is reeling, and so is much of our camp community.

I don't know whether I should tell my 7yo. I can't imagine telling her, and how scared it would make her. And yet, if this family comes back to camp next year, my 7yo would need to know what they had been through and why the little brother wasn't with them. And yet, if they don't come back, she would never need to know.

I can't imagine telling her. I'm still so shocked and upset. What would you do?


I'd tell her when it came up naturally in conversation. Or maybe tell her right before you go, why the friend might seem sad.

#40 Caroline

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:03 PM

Rivka, I am so sorry for your loss. I knew a family where something similar happened. They put their two year old to bed, and she died in her sleep. I had a daughter the same age, and it shook me to the core. Hugs to you.

I didn't have to tell my kids because they never met this family. (They were friends with my DBIL and his family and I met them at a bridal shower Nd a baby shower.)

My thoughts are with you.

#41 Catherine

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 07:24 PM

My dh and I have talked before about the fact that we were glad that the first death of a relative our kids had to confront was not a very close person. If it had been, I'm not sure how the kid would have handled it. Because death and dying can be so difficult to accept for sensitive children, more exposure, and having a chance to observe how we adults handled it was a bit comforting for them. So I would definitely be in the camp of telling her, at some point, maybe without the scariest part (that he just died in his sleep).

I think it's also important to allow\encourage them to make contact with the grieving sibling, if she's inclined. It might help both of them a bit.

#42 Elizabeth in MN

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:20 PM

I would tell her, and even that he died in his sleep. This is a good way to explore death while it is close enough to touch her heart but far enough away for it not to overwhelm her with her own loss. I'd also have her send a card of condolence to her friend, because that's what we do for friends.

Why would I tell her that the boy died in is sleep? So that she knew he died without pain and suffering. SIDS can still happen up to the age of six, though it's very rare over the age of one.

#43 trlt

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Posted 08 October 2012 - 08:11 AM

Why would I tell her that the boy died in is sleep? So that she knew he died without pain and suffering. SIDS can still happen up to the age of six, though it's very rare over the age of one.


Perhaps if her dd was older that might be a comforting thought. At that age I think a child (I know mine would) would be worried about going to sleep and dying of having another loved one go to sleep and die. If the OP wants to tell her dd that the boy died she can reassure her dd that he died without pain/suffering without giving specifics. I remember being 9 years old and having an aunt who died and my mom and grandma kept saying that it was painless, she died in her sleep. Perhaps that comforted them but it did not comfort me at all....I was just too worried about my loved ones going to sleep and never waking up.

#44 CyndiLJ

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Posted 08 October 2012 - 08:57 AM

So sorry to hear of this loss, it must be a true nightmare for the parents.

You know, we Americans are very odd about death. We have become so distanced from so many truths of life...people live and they die, our food (meat) was once living and animals were killed and butchered so we might have food, terrorism exists in many parts of the world and tens of thousands of people go to sleep at night in fear for their lives.

Our modern culture has perpetuated the myth that everything should always be wonderful, we should be sheltered from all the pain, sadness and violence that still exists but we somehow have managed to distance ourselves from.

What it does is keep our children, and ourselves, living in a state of denial that bad things happen, that death is part of life. Then when it IS encountered, we don't handle it well for we have not had anything modeled for us.

When our son was in 3rd grade, sadly, one of his Cub Scout mates and also a classmate was killed in an automobile accident. We pondered what to do about it and finally decided to take off work with Matt so he could attend the funeral. It was an open casket. We went, we talked about death in very concrete terms, we cried a little and he saw the grief and tears of the family which could not be contained. We held hands and walked by the casket to pay our respects.

It was one of our better decisions as parents. Two years ago we lost our 22 year old nephew and we all went to the funeral and lived in grief for awhile as we hugged and sobbed with my brother and sister in law. Our kids, while sad, handled it very well and now have a clearer understanding of the death and grieving process.

Our job as parents is not to hide hard truths or experiences from our kids, but to walk with them through it hand in hand until they are strong enough to walk through them alone. If we never allow them those building block opportunities, how can they deal with things in a healthy manner when they are older and faced with situations without us? And I guess I feel that starts when they are young, and 7 or 8 is old enough to begin to understand that death occurs, it is heartbreaking, and here are some things you can do to comfort friends who are grieving.

Just my experiences,
Cindy

#45 Night Elf

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Posted 08 October 2012 - 09:18 AM

We pondered what to do about it and finally decided to take off work with Matt so he could attend the funeral. It was an open casket.


But kids are different and we should respect their wishes the same as we would an adult. When my grandfather died, I was 13 yrs. old. I did not, not, not want to see him in that open casket but my mom and grandma forced me to go up to it. I was also forced to look at my father when he died when I was 21. In both cases, I have a very difficult time remembering what they looked like when they were alive. When I think of either of them, the first visual I have is of them in the coffin. I think that's a sad thing indeed. Am I too sensitive? I guess I am. I'm sorry there are people in the world who suffer but I just don't believe anyone should be forced to suffer with the idea that others live it all the time. That opens a huge can of worms as to what we should force our children to experience in the name of making them aware of suffering in the world. Personally, I count myself lucky that my family doesn't have to live in fear of our lives.

#46 CyndiLJ

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Posted 08 October 2012 - 01:02 PM

But kids are different and we should respect their wishes the same as we would an adult. When my grandfather died, I was 13 yrs. old. I did not, not, not want to see him in that open casket but my mom and grandma forced me to go up to it. I was also forced to look at my father when he died when I was 21. In both cases, I have a very difficult time remembering what they looked like when they were alive. When I think of either of them, the first visual I have is of them in the coffin. I think that's a sad thing indeed. Am I too sensitive? I guess I am. I'm sorry there are people in the world who suffer but I just don't believe anyone should be forced to suffer with the idea that others live it all the time. That opens a huge can of worms as to what we should force our children to experience in the name of making them aware of suffering in the world. Personally, I count myself lucky that my family doesn't have to live in fear of our lives.


I don't think you are too sensitive at all, for I know there are many very much like yourself. I didn't explain clearly enough that had we not allowed our son to attend and view the funeral, it would have been more about our own feelings about it all rather than his sensitivity over it. While I won't say he was chomping at the bit to go, he was not at all unable to deal with it and when we approached him and asked him if he wanted to or not, he said he did and felt it was important. I would not have forced him to, but I was extremely glad he didn't want to back away from the experience and was willing to do so as he said "because it might make his mom and dad feel better to know his friends care and will miss him, too."

I still do think, though, that while I do count myself as extremely lucky that my family doesn't have to live in fear for our lives, our cultural and purposeful distancing ourselves from the extreme suffering of others also makes their suffering go unheard and unwitnessed. That, in turn, leads to our own inaction. Our own lack of suffering allows us the great privilege of living a very insulated, protected life. We all have to raise our children in the ways we feel called to do. I want my children to work to make the world better for others, to be moved to action. For us, that may look different than in other families...that's why we are all so different!

Mainly though, bringing this closer to home, I would far rather our children learn to view death...and life...as normal parts of being human, not as something to necessarily fear and avoid. I want them, while they are still able to process it with loving parents, to experience it, talk about it, learn how to work through grief and comfort others in their own. I have always felt our job is not to shelter them from the realities of life, but to help them understand it. That being said, of course I don't advocate showing bloody battle scenes over and over to young children. Everyone has their decisions to make about these sorts of issues, and what is right for one family is not right for another. For us, this approach has worked well.

Cindy

#47 Catherine

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Posted 08 October 2012 - 02:17 PM

Wise words. I think you are right on all counts.

#48 Rivka

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 05:39 PM

A little more news. "No one has any idea" why the little boy died, so my thought that perhaps there were pre-existing health problems that the family was aware of was wrong.

I just found out that CPS removed the daughter, Alex's friend, from the home while the parents were investigated for neglect. At least she was placed with her paternal grandparents, so she wasn't in a strange foster home, but her mother and father had to have supervised visits only. I am crying for that little girl right now, separated from her parents at the time she needed them most. And thinking of how badly her parents must have needed to hold and look at their living child for reassurance, and how that was taken from them. She is back home now, but that was four days of separation.

I just can't imagine any of this. Hug your kids tight, everyone.

#49 ma23peas

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 05:56 PM

I would not tell her...you said they only meet once a year and there is no guarantee they will come next year. I err on the side of the wisdom of Corrie Ten Boom's father...let me (the parent) carry that knowledge until I feel you are ready to handle it. If they saw each other daily and /or your daughter would definitely hear it then I would address it but under the circumstances you shared, I would tuck it close to my heart and cover their family in prayer.

#50 justLisa

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 06:12 PM

A little more news. "No one has any idea" why the little boy died, so my thought that perhaps there were pre-existing health problems that the family was aware of was wrong.

I just found out that CPS removed the daughter, Alex's friend, from the home while the parents were investigated for neglect. At least she was placed with her paternal grandparents, so she wasn't in a strange foster home, but her mother and father had to have supervised visits only. I am crying for that little girl right now, separated from her parents at the time she needed them most. And thinking of how badly her parents must have needed to hold and look at their living child for reassurance, and how that was taken from them. She is back home now, but that was four days of separation.

I just can't imagine any of this. Hug your kids tight, everyone.


Oh my Rivka this is just so sad :( Hugging mine for sure


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