Thursday and Friday with no spotting or cramping or anything I went ahead with planned field trips, just trying to stay busy and distracted and not think about it.
Saturday, I started having spotting. It was pink and only when I wiped, but not every time, just sort of light and sporadic. So I decided I better not leave the house. But nothing happened.
Sunday, the spotting became brown and there was more of it. Continued sticking around home, but nothing else happened.
Today, it became red, sometimes with brown mixed in, and it's not just when I wipe anymore but on a pad, too. It's been like a light period all day. I've been mildly crampy on and off. I figured today would be the day I would officially miscarry.
But here it is, after midnight, and it still hasn't officially happened. I haven't left my house for three days because I'm scared it will happen while I'm out somewhere, and I feel like a prisoner here. I've already started canceling scheduled events, probably can't get the kids to scheduled activities this week, I know it sounds petty all things considered, but I hate feeling "stuck" at home.
I don't know what to expect exactly, it didn't take this long last time from the time I started bleeding. I lost it by the next day. I dread it every time I go into the bathroom. I am a nervous wreck because I'm supposed to be able to retrieve it for chromosomal testing and I am still not sure how I'm supposed to accomplish that without it just slipping away down the toilet bowl or whether I'll recognize it for being definitely "it" and not just other tissue or whatever.
I am so sad that this is going to be my third loss in a row, I am so stressed over what to expect, when, how to retrieve it. I am exhausted and having an impossible time falling asleep and keep feeling like I have to go to the bathroom again and again to check what's going on.
I just want this over with. I can't even stand it anymore.
I think I might call the doctor's office first thing in the AM and ask them if they can just do a D&C or something so this can be over with and so THEY can retrieve whatever they need to retrieve for testing. But who knows if they'll say yes or how long I'd have to wait for that to be scheduled or if it will happen on its own before then.
I could REALLY use some sympathy right now. This is just miserable.
ETA: update page 13
Edited by NanceXToo, 25 September 2012 - 03:53 PM.